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RE: Financial Domme's?Yea right - 8/30/2010 10:06:34 AM

VideoAdminAlpha

Posts: 3876
Joined: 7/25/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

quote:

ORIGINAL: rulemylife

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

There isn't anything that the mods can do---it's a FREE site, that means that the pros have the same rights on the other side as anyone. Being a pro or findom doesn't make someone a scammer.

Why isn't there anything the moderators can do?

We are often told by the mods on the message boards that our comments are against the TOS, yet I consistently see profiles clearly violaing the TOS.

By CM's own definition asking for money qualifies as a scammer and a TOS violation.

Well, if it means that much to you, my best suggestion is to write to Support and volunteer to monitor profile reporting. They will be happy to have your help.

Please do not answer for us. :) We have lots of folks volunteer for that job, and usually, *koff* they have their own agenda on policing. We do not accept their offer.

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You can't please all the people all of the time.Unfortunately there are times you cannot please any of them :( You can only do your best, and hope they realize that.

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Post #: 101

RE: Financial Domme's?Yea right - 8/30/2010 10:10:53 AM

ResidentSadist

Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline

quote:

I am truly amazed at just how many so called "Financial Domme's" there really is on this website.

Really folks, how can you be surprised by sex industry professionals on any dating site? Haven't you ever been to any of the other sites? CM has a low proportion of hookers with whips compared to most sites. Some sites are 99% pros.

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Post #: 102

RE: Financial Domme's?Yea right - 8/30/2010 11:15:24 AM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

Really, VAA? Well, I guess the whiners will just have to use that HIDE funtion like the rest of us. :)

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Post #: 103

RE: Financial Domme's?Yea right - 8/30/2010 11:42:11 AM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

*waves hand madly* I wanna volunteer!! No agenda!! I promise!!

(well, yanno, aside from the obvious: "you've ignored TOS.. GTFO"

edited for dyslexic typing

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Post #: 104

RE: Financial Domme's?Yea right - 8/30/2010 1:19:00 PM

PeonForHer

Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: VideoAdminAlpha
We have lots of folks volunteer for that job, and usually, *koff* they have their own agenda on policing. We do not accept their offer.

Yep, I bet they'll all be biased, prejudiced, bad-tempered and inclined to go nutty at regular intervals. But surely you do get the occasional male applying as well, don't you?

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Post #: 105

RE: Financial Domme's?Yea right - 8/30/2010 1:20:04 PM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

*smacks Peon*

brat!!

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Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

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Post #: 106

RE: Financial Domme's?Yea right - 8/31/2010 11:21:31 AM

asilentscream

Posts: 17
Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline

I agree with Lady Eternity about the findommes on here. My gripe with them isn't so much that they're doing what they're doing because it is a legitimate fetish that people do seem to enjoy, so I hear. And I can't fault someone so much for seeing an opportunity. My problem is that it really does bog down this site. It's the sheer numbers.

I don't really get mad about it, it does make me wonder though. How did this many of them seem to get here all at once? I know word spreads fast, but damn, it's kind of crazy. And I've seen firsthand how it happens. One person sort of has a domination kink, finds this site, tells alll of their friends, they find this site and say "LOL, look at the freekz" and even more of them find this site, and suddenly a perfectly legitimate personals site is bogged down. Not that it's impossible to meet real people here, I've met and talked to many wonderful people from here.

The sheer numbers do make me wonder though. The one thing that does irk me about it though is that to me it sort of cheapens the lifestyle. What I mean by that is that there's many people, male and female, who are in this lifestyle and know it's right for them and seek someone genuine and who feels the same about the lifestyle and finding a connection. I think a lot of, for lack of a better term, outsiders see this and misconstrue what it means and try to exploit it.

So this whole thing leaves me conflicted. Yes I believe most of thoes types are lazy, but I also realize they may have a desperate and legitimate need for the money, such as being a student or caring for an ailing family member. But at the same time, I can't help but be a bit irked about a lifestyle that I feel is important to me being exploited.

Really though, I think I'd be in favor of some kind of setting or check mark that people can click when creating a profile that has to do with the findomme thing so that profiles like that can be easily filtered out of search results.

But at the same time, that opens a whole new can of worms that could, when thought about to ridiculous extremes, theoretically end in demands for check boxes and settings that would allow people to filter out anything they found annoying. Maybe the best idea is to just live with it.

< Message edited by asilentscream -- 8/31/2010 11:25:31 AM >

(in reply to Charles6682)

Post #: 107

RE: Financial Domme's?Yea right - 8/31/2010 11:29:43 AM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

At the same time, the number of findommes or pro dommes doesn't effect some of us at all. The number of profiles that include this don't bother Dominant women, Dominant men, or submissive women for the most part. It really does effect only those who are searching Dominant female profiles. Submissive males who are happily collared, such as the OP of this thread stated in another post here:

quote:

ORIGINAL: Charles6682

Collarme is a good website.It does a good service for the BDSM community.I have been on this site for year's now.It was through this website that I found the job that I now have where I get paid to be dominated,go figure that one!It was throough my job that I found the right Lady finally to collar me.She is a beautiful African-American Goddess with a great personality.While I can't agrue that there are fake's on here,there are also some real people who are actually who they say they are.As with anywhere in life,you will alway's have the fraud's and the genuine.The bigest lesson I learned from all this is that patience is a virtue.Common sense help's determine who is just here for the kink's and who is here because they truly know,this way of life is truly who they are.

It seems to Me it shouldn't effect such a happy male already belonging to a Dominant.

Also, what happens on a website really doesn't say crap about the lifestyle as a whole. I'm in the lifestyle and I can promise you that, in My view, this computer that I'm staring at isn't it.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to asilentscream)

Post #: 108

RE: Financial Domme's?Yea right - 8/31/2010 1:07:05 PM

hngnyc

Posts: 24
Joined: 3/24/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

At the same time, the number of findommes or pro dommes doesn't effect some of us at all. The number of profiles that include this don't bother Dominant women, Dominant men, or submissive women for the most part. It really does effect only those who are searching Dominant female profiles.

I disagree with this. Those "business" minded profiles often provide excellent wank fodder. They are tailored to reenforce their targets fantasies along with some promise of reality. Many of those crap messages that serious women are getting are from men who are in a state of mind created or enchance by those marketing driven profiles. And it's never the state that relationship or play seeking women want.

While the target of these profiles are men, women suffer as well.

Also, the notion that financial domination is a common kink is unfortunate. It is far more likely that men are simply trying to trade some cash for attention. Don't legitimize it.

It makes sense that collarme does not want to battle with those who try to profit. But it is disappointing, and misguided that the more vocal women around here take the "it's not my problem" postion. You're wrong.

-hng

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 109

RE: Financial Domme's?Yea right - 8/31/2010 1:10:26 PM

VaguelyCurious

Posts: 5264
Joined: 12/2/2009
From: United Kingdom
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: hngnyc

Many of those crap messages that serious women are getting are from men who are in a state of mind created or enchance by those marketing driven profiles. And it's never the state that relationship or play seeking women want.

Well that may be the case, but I don't know whether I'd *want* to be with someone so easily influenced by what others tell them should turn them on.

I've managed to meet some utterly fantastic men from this site, so that argument doesn't really hold too much water for me.

So sorry, but in this case *you're* wrong.

_____________________________

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Post #: 110

RE: Financial Domme's?Yea right - 8/31/2010 3:37:08 PM

LadyConstanze

Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline

Can somebody explain what the problem is? Most of the people who complain seem to complain about others who don't want them or expect something of them, a bit like "add hot water, instant relationship". Alright, somebody wants money, skip, move on, not like you have to pay to be here or anything.

I'm not overly keen on having dangly bits waved around, occasionally I get an email with dangly bits on full display, oh dear, big deal, delete delete...

How about those guys who want to financially domme me? You know living forever in my basement (sorry, that's the garage and my car is more important than you) and expecting me to care for them, should I report them too? What's that than a case of financial domination? Sending the Mistress out to work so you can eat and live in my freaking basement? Sorry, rather have rodents, possibly less of a problem and they might even be cuter and with 2 cats and a dog I don't really have to worry about them that much.

Finding somebody who's compatible is not going to be easy, finding somebody who's compatible and has your kink is a lot harder, why do people think they should get all that delivered on a silver plate because they joined that site? It's been a few years since I signed up, nowhere did I notice the guarantee that I would be hooked up.

Oh yeah, and sending money to Nigeria is a bad idea, sending money to strangers is not all that bright...

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Those who do and those who don't!

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Post #: 111

RE: Financial Domme's?Yea right - 8/31/2010 3:47:29 PM

Twoshoes

Posts: 1218
Joined: 7/27/2010
Status: offline

The worst is when you find someone with a compatible personality, similiar D/s interests, similiar values and completely different life goals.

Now that is what really sucks.

(in reply to LadyConstanze)

Post #: 112

RE: Financial Domme's?Yea right - 8/31/2010 4:03:55 PM

VaguelyCurious

Posts: 5264
Joined: 12/2/2009
From: United Kingdom
Status: offline

Welcome to 'living for the here and now', fella!

Not every relationship you have has to aim for forever-you've been indoctrinated by the grown-ups.

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Post #: 113

RE: Financial Domme's?Yea right - 8/31/2010 4:08:13 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: hngnyc
I disagree with this. Those "business" minded profiles often provide excellent wank fodder. They are tailored to reenforce their targets fantasies along with some promise of reality. Many of those crap messages that serious women are getting are from men who are in a state of mind created or enchance by those marketing driven profiles. And it's never the state that relationship or play seeking women want.

While the target of these profiles are men, women suffer as well.

Also, the notion that financial domination is a common kink is unfortunate. It is far more likely that men are simply trying to trade some cash for attention. Don't legitimize it.

It makes sense that collarme does not want to battle with those who try to profit. But it is disappointing, and misguided that the more vocal women around here take the "it's not my problem" postion. You're wrong.

-hng

We'll have to disagree on this one. The twenty-something year old findomme is getting just as many emails on the subject as those of us who don't fit the category. In fact, when the stereotype that you mention is reinforced, it only makes them easier for us to spot. We're not so stupid on the female end of this to be unable to pinpoint it. Trust Me. The emails are entirely different and I can promise you that I've had more than one laugh on My side of the screen from the sheer lack of experience and stereotype feed.

A kink doesn't have to be popular for it to be legitimate. If we were talking about roman showers, rather than financial domination, a thread such as this one would probably violate TOS for insulting the kinks of others.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to hngnyc)

Post #: 114

RE: Financial Domme's?Yea right - 8/31/2010 4:25:16 PM

Twoshoes

Posts: 1218
Joined: 7/27/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: VaguelyCurious

Welcome to 'living for the here and now', fella!

Not every relationship you have has to aim for forever-you've been indoctrinated by the grown-ups.

Hahhahaha. Yes, these grown-ups...

(in reply to VaguelyCurious)

Post #: 115

RE: Financial Domme's?Yea right - 8/31/2010 4:28:25 PM

tiggerspoohbear

Posts: 19141
Joined: 6/27/2010
Status: offline

~Fast Reply~

If'n ya don't like the profile, then hide it. I spend plenty of time doing that when I'm just looking through profiles on the other side just for the hell of it. Ain't hard to do. Suck it up buttercup and move on.

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Post #: 116

RE: Financial Domme's?Yea right - 8/31/2010 4:32:30 PM

VaguelyCurious

Posts: 5264
Joined: 12/2/2009
From: United Kingdom
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Twoshoes

Hahhahaha. Yes, these grown-ups...

Ok fine, I was being silly, but seriously: just because your life goals are different doesn't mean you can't share something amazing. We're taught to be looking for the one to buy a house and raise children and have pets and get old snuggled on the couch arguing about the remote with, but you don't *always* have to be on the search for that...

_____________________________

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Post #: 117

RE: Financial Domme's?Yea right - 8/31/2010 10:19:16 PM

Charles6682

Posts: 1820
Joined: 10/1/2007
From: Saint Pete,FL
Status: offline

LadyPact,I can't argue with that post you put on here.I am happily collared.I am also trying to meet like minded people on here as well.I get weird message's from FinDomme's on here out of the nowhere.It probaly shouldn't bother me.I need to remember my own word's.Like anywhere in life,there are those who are real and those who are not.Common sense is what make's all the difference.

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(in reply to VaguelyCurious)

Post #: 118

RE: Financial Domme's?Yea right - 9/2/2010 8:09:07 AM

Myles

Posts: 94
Joined: 2/2/2005
Status: offline

Pro Dommes are one thing as OP said money exchanged for services rendered....for the most part (now this is just my opinion) It appears that a bunch of lazy women have found a way to live high on the hog from other peoples hard earned cash.

(in reply to PeonForHer)

Post #: 119

RE: Financial Domme's?Yea right - 9/2/2010 10:25:26 AM

tiggerspoohbear

Posts: 19141
Joined: 6/27/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Myles

Pro Dommes are one thing as OP said money exchanged for services rendered....for the most part (now this is just my opinion) It appears that a bunch of lazy women have found a way to live high on the hog from other peoples hard earned cash.

And this is just MHO, these so-called lazy women living high on the hog wouldn't be doing so if there weren't idiotic people who are very willing to part with their "hard earned cash".

_____________________________

"RABBIT IS GOOD, RABBIT IS WISE".

"I'm a baaa-aaad pussycat".

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Post #: 120

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