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RE: Are there kinks you won't talk about on CM? - 9/20/2010 3:03:40 PM

CreativeDominant

Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: VaguelyCurious

There's a blog entry a friend wrote that I thought might be relevant to a current thread, but in it he's discussing pretty dangerous stuff and I didn't feel comfortable posting a link-I ended up copping out and cmailing the OP just for their own interest.

It got me thinking back to a discussion I remember having with Lady P when I was pretty new-she said there were things she wouldn't post the specifics of on the forums in case someone inexperienced tried them and it went wrong. I was kind of offended at the time-I thought the duty of care was with the reader, not the writer, but I get what she meant now-I don't want anyone else's accidents or bad experiences on my head, even indirectly.

I think she was talking about needleplay, and it got me wondering:

Are there kinks you won't discuss on CM, for whatever reason? Is it that you don't want to be responsible for encouraging other people to behave irresponsibly, or you don't think they'll be received well, or the experiences are just too private, or something else entirely?

As Stephen noted, there are an awful lot of things I won't discuss on CM, some of them having to do with kink. Part of that is because there are aspects of my life that I don't care to share with the world at large and part of that is because there are certain stances I have that I will only argue about for a little while and then, upon the realization that I am unlikely to change someone's mind...or the converse, they are unlikely to change mine...there just isn't any sense in arguing further and that tends to either kill threads or lead to the accusation that you won't back up your stance. One reason I try...thought not with much success lately...to stay away from the political threads. Things get twisted, emotionalism comes into play and pretty soon the argument denigrates into personal attacks rather than issue-oriented discussion/argument. While I am willing to do that with my political beliefs once in awhile and more willing to do it with discussions of a BDSM-D/s-relationship topic, I am not willing to put a lot of what I do PERSONALLY out there.

(in reply to VaguelyCurious)

Post #: 41

RE: Are there kinks you won't talk about on CM? - 9/20/2010 3:13:46 PM

Acer49

Posts: 1434
Joined: 8/7/2009
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quote:

Are there kinks you won't discuss on CM, for whatever reason? Is it that you don't want to be responsible for encouraging other people to behave irresponsibly, or you don't think they'll be received well, or the experiences are just too private, or something else entirely?

_____________________________

quote:

ORIGINAL: mbes

Absolutely, but it is from a privacy standpoint. What other adults do is not my decision, or place to censor.

There is no aspect about this lifestyle I will not openly discuss. Anyone is free to ask anything they like. However if it about my partner, they will need to ask her. I do not kiss and tell. I am not my brothers keeper. Just because I will discuss knife play or fake rape scene, does not mean I am twisting their arm to go out and do it, no matter how great I tell them that it is
I do not act irresponsibly nor do I try to convince others to
I do not concern myself with whatever others may think about me or my activities, that is their cross to bear.

_____________________________

Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself.
Harvey Fierstein

(in reply to mbes)

Post #: 42

RE: Are there kinks you won't talk about on CM? - 9/20/2010 3:18:14 PM

wittynamehere

Posts: 759
Joined: 2/5/2010
Status: offline

FR

I'm a private person and that limits what I'll say online in open areas. And then there are rules against a lot of the things I'd like to discuss, so I can't or I'll be banned.

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Post #: 43

RE: Are there kinks you won't talk about on CM? - 9/20/2010 5:57:48 PM

porcelaine

Posts: 5020
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: VaguelyCurious

Are there kinks you won't discuss on CM, for whatever reason? Is it that you don't want to be responsible for encouraging other people to behave irresponsibly, or you don't think they'll be received well, or the experiences are just too private, or something else entirely?

VaguelyCurious,

Yes. Both reasons apply and there's another that I feel very strongly about and that's respecting the other party. Irregardless if the individual participates in this site or others, we're all entitled to our privacy and I view those disclosures as a violation of that principle. I believe it's possible to share my opinions without providing a play by play of the things I've seen and done. More than this, I can't fathom how the information would be beneficial to the would be stranger without tainting the deliverer in the process.

~porcelaine

_____________________________

His will; my fate.

(in reply to VaguelyCurious)

Post #: 44

RE: Are there kinks you won't talk about on CM? - 9/20/2010 10:15:43 PM

MarcEsadrian

Posts: 852
Joined: 8/24/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: VaguelyCurious

quote:

ORIGINAL: MarcEsadrian

Beware what you divulge, even to vetted confidants and "lovers" you think you can trust. Despite the wooden-headed hypocrisy in doing so, there's a sacred shotgun kept under many beds.

I love that you put 'lovers' in quotation marks

I think there's some truth in this. There are things that go round my head that I doubt I'll ever share with anyone, 'lover' or not. But I suspect it's not just kinky people who are like that-I reckon everyone has the odd dark thought.

Hmmm, yes. I can be a cynical bastard, but I don't mean to put all lovers in those biting quotes. "Lover" is the most personal and intimate word I can think of, where there is more one mind among two; it's a seldom realized ideal in reality. Dark thoughts are one thing; I think nearly everyone grants impunity to the occasional bout of amoral Tourettes within the brain, but hideaway longings, passions, recurring imaginings and experiences that could only be deemed patently evil and beyond mere accidents of the brain belching up a transient what if scenario—yes, those are entirely different.

_____________________________

Omnes una manet nox

Founder, Humbled Females

(in reply to VaguelyCurious)

Post #: 45

RE: Are there kinks you won't talk about on CM? - 9/20/2010 10:24:35 PM

Kana

Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
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Are there kinks you won't discuss on CM, for whatever reason?
Nope, not really. I am pretty up front about what I like and don't. It's all part of my diabolical plan to absolutely disrupt the intranetz and confound everyone I encounter by engaging in honesty.

Is it that you don't want to be responsible for encouraging other people to behave irresponsibly,
Nope. I couldn't care less what anyone else does and if they are stupid enough to try advanced edge play without any training, any negative repercussions are on them.

or you don't think they'll be received well,
Again, couldn't care less, though I will confess to enjoying rattling others cages when I get the chance.

or the experiences are just too private, or something else entirely?
Nope. But it will be a cold day in hell before I shared something truly private or personal on a public forum board.

< Message edited by Kana -- 9/20/2010 10:36:07 PM >

_____________________________

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HST

(in reply to ResidentSadist)

Post #: 46

RE: Are there kinks you won't talk about on CM? - 9/21/2010 2:12:56 AM

ranja

Posts: 2111
Joined: 11/1/2007
Status: offline

Yes there are kinks i won't talk about... they are mainly kinks i have no clue about, so i have nothing relevant to say about them
i wish more people were like me in that respect

(in reply to VaguelyCurious)

Post #: 47

RE: Are there kinks you won't talk about on CM? - 9/21/2010 7:16:39 AM

MistressLavinia

Posts: 1110
Joined: 3/6/2009
From: DFWM in the Land of LaviKinks
Status: offline

Yes most definitely. I rarely talk about any of my kinks, but there's some I'd never talk about here or anywhere, they stay locked away- where they should be

_____________________________

If somebody offers you a lifetime supply of candy and there is just one piece, don’t eat it: It’s probably poison:
~I am: ~Petal-icious~Bitch with Tits~
~ Ravager ~Sovereign~ LaviKinKs

(in reply to ranja)

Post #: 48

RE: Are there kinks you won't talk about on CM? - 9/21/2010 5:31:46 PM

laurell3

Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline

Yes absolutely.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to VaguelyCurious)

Post #: 49

RE: Are there kinks you won't talk about on CM? - 9/26/2010 4:10:38 AM

subboi3382

Posts: 379
Joined: 8/4/2005
Status: offline

yes, they won't let me lol

(in reply to laurell3)

Post #: 50

RE: Are there kinks you won't talk about on CM? - 9/27/2010 2:21:44 PM

SubPet715

Posts: 337
Joined: 8/24/2010
From: Brooklyn, NY
Status: offline

I try not to talk about kinks period on CM...weird huh?

Reason is I don't wanna seem like one of those generic horn dogs who thinks nothing of more of this site than it being a free adult friend finder. Kinks and the like will be discussed by anyone who is polite enough to message me and is curious enough to do so. But I won't freely discuss my kinks with just anyone.

_____________________________

Passion isn't really happiness.

(in reply to subboi3382)

Post #: 51

RE: Are there kinks you won't talk about on CM? - 9/27/2010 3:22:20 PM

Madame4a

Posts: 2045
Joined: 2/4/2008
From: Washington, DC area
Status: offline

Just like LP.. I definitely refrain from talking about most types of SM activities for that reason.. the only time I will, is privately with someone I trust not to wander off and try something new on the strength of my advice only. And trust me.. it happens.. SM, in my mind, is a hands on thing and should be, in part, learned that way..

relationship crap.. particularly everyone else's relationship crap,

I'll discuss ad nauseum...

quote:

ORIGINAL: VaguelyCurious

There's a blog entry a friend wrote that I thought might be relevant to a current thread, but in it he's discussing pretty dangerous stuff and I didn't feel comfortable posting a link-I ended up copping out and cmailing the OP just for their own interest.

It got me thinking back to a discussion I remember having with Lady P when I was pretty new-she said there were things she wouldn't post the specifics of on the forums in case someone inexperienced tried them and it went wrong. I was kind of offended at the time-I thought the duty of care was with the reader, not the writer, but I get what she meant now-I don't want anyone else's accidents or bad experiences on my head, even indirectly.

I think she was talking about needleplay, and it got me wondering:

Are there kinks you won't discuss on CM, for whatever reason? Is it that you don't want to be responsible for encouraging other people to behave irresponsibly, or you don't think they'll be received well, or the experiences are just too private, or something else entirely?

_____________________________

You're crazy bitch
But you f*ck so good, I'm on top of it
When I dream, I'm doing you all night
Scratches all down my back to keep me right on

(in reply to VaguelyCurious)

Post #: 52

RE: Are there kinks you won't talk about on CM? - 9/29/2010 1:49:26 PM

SailingBum

Posts: 3225
Joined: 12/10/2007
From: Sailin the stormy sea
Status: offline

I ve done quite a few things that will never see the light of day kink or otherwise.

BadOne

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We are all so very lucky to have you with us to impart your great wisdom.

(in reply to ResidentSadist)

Post #: 53

RE: Are there kinks you won't talk about on CM? - 9/29/2010 7:18:37 PM

Carouselambra

Posts: 99
Joined: 9/9/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

There are lots of things that I will not disclose in the open forums, and a few of them are kink.

DarkSteven on 9/28/10 at 9:41 PM:

Well, I love female asses - so pretty, especially if jiggling. And I love the control of holding her in place, and getting to vary the intensity, the rhythm. When she squirms, it rubs my cock if she's OTK as well.

_____________________________

If you talk to God, you are praying. If God talks to you, you have schizophrenia. -Thomas Szasz

(in reply to DarkSteven)

Post #: 54

RE: Are there kinks you won't talk about on CM? - 9/29/2010 7:20:29 PM

Aynne88

Posts: 3873
Joined: 8/29/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Carouselambra

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

There are lots of things that I will not disclose in the open forums, and a few of them are kink.

DarkSteven on 9/28/10 at 9:41 PM:

Well, I love female asses - so pretty, especially if jiggling. And I love the control of holding her in place, and getting to vary the intensity, the rhythm. When she squirms, it rubs my cock if she's OTK as well.

n/m.

.

< Message edited by Aynne88 -- 9/29/2010 7:33:51 PM >

_____________________________

As long as people will shed the blood of innocent creatures there can be no peace, no liberty, no harmony between people. Slaughter and justice cannot dwell together.
—Isaac Bashevis Singer, writer and Nobel laureate (1902–1991)

(in reply to Carouselambra)

Post #: 55

RE: Are there kinks you won't talk about on CM? - 9/30/2010 10:04:15 AM

anniezz338

Posts: 1183
Joined: 8/17/2010
Status: offline

Yes, there is one. My off the wall guess is the ones people don't mention usually are considered taboo. Touching on taboos can be very touchy.

(in reply to ResidentSadist)

Post #: 56

RE: Are there kinks you won't talk about on CM? - 9/30/2010 4:24:03 PM

LadyRian

Posts: 486
Joined: 9/5/2010
Status: offline

Yes.

_____________________________

"Dodging bullets since 2010"

(in reply to anniezz338)

Post #: 57

RE: Are there kinks you won't talk about on CM? - 9/30/2010 10:51:47 PM

subforherMaster

Posts: 25
Joined: 7/4/2010
Status: offline

Some kinks are private and only to be discussed within the relationship. No one else needs to be in on them.

(in reply to LadyRian)

Post #: 58

RE: Are there kinks you won't talk about on CM? - 10/1/2010 10:15:48 AM

ThundersCry

Posts: 892
Status: offline

of course....
my bizz...
<eg>

(in reply to VaguelyCurious)

Post #: 59

RE: Are there kinks you won't talk about on CM? - 10/1/2010 10:44:51 AM

thatsub

Posts: 176
Joined: 5/3/2010
Status: offline

This forum is a permanent record of sorts for your CM profile, and due to privacy issues I avoid discussing certain topics no matter how interested I am.

_____________________________

Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something. Plato

Confucius say: To make a long story short, don't tell it.

(in reply to ThundersCry)

Post #: 60

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