RE: Any survivor want to release anger

RE: Any survivor want to release anger (Full Version)

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mnottertail -> RE: Any survivor want to release anger (9/20/2010 11:26:47 AM)
ipse dixit, but I gotta tell you, your illegitimate appeal to authority begins with the op. forget that makes you wrong on both counts, you are casting the authority as yourself. JHYH (IAM)

stef -> RE: Any survivor want to release anger (9/20/2010 11:27:08 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WhipTheHip Anyone here knows what Argumentum ad verecundiam means? I have credentials and licenses but I don't put any stock in them. I don't think they have any value whatsoever. So you can thnk what you like. I stand by the number of people I have helped. You can believe what you want to believe because you are close-minded, and you wll do so anyway. Even if i trotted out all my degrees, certifications and licenses you would still go on attacking me and positions with the same exact intensity. Who are you fooling? Dodge, lie, evade, misdirect. Who do you think you are fooling? Get lost, predator. ~stef

SeparatedSub -> RE: Any survivor want to release anger (9/20/2010 11:29:46 AM)
I'm not attacking your position, not in the least. I'm attacking the fact that your original post was simply meant as a way to troll these message boards for emotionally-damaged people.

OttersSwim -> RE: Any survivor want to release anger (9/20/2010 11:30:50 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WhipTheHip sexyred1 wrote: quote: If someone is using BDSM as an expression of anger or self hatred, then it is abusive. It is not abusive if it occurs between consenting adults for their mutual benefit. Edge play is abusive and is not sane. Half the things subs ask their Doms to do are abusive. Sewing a sub's vagina shut is not abusive? Skewering her breasts with knitting needles is not abusive? Using her as a human ashtray is not abusive? Cannning her to the point where she is left with permanent scars is not abusive? Branding her is not abusive? Sharing your sub with your friends is not abusive? Why don't you ask any normal human being which is more abusive? Ah...so now we are all "abnormal"...not "normal human beings". Dude...it's clear that pretty much every person posting in this thread finds something quite "abnormal" as we see it in your posts, what you are trying to do, and your general attitude about BDSM. "Survivors" of abuse as you call them have their own path and no one - not you, not I, nor anyone else can even pretend to "understand". Professionals who go through years of schooling don't even "understand"...they simply help by giving the person someone to talk it through with and provide -gentle- tools to help move on and through to a place of peace. What you seem to be offering is not peaceful. It is using someone's pain to satisfy a kink that you have. People don't like it, they find it quite creepy...what else do you need to know? Time to pack it in and go find another audience. This one is really getting ready to vote you off the island...

BonesFromAsh -> RE: Any survivor want to release anger (9/20/2010 11:35:38 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WhipTheHip Anyone here knows what Argumentum ad verecundiam means? I have credentials and licenses but I don't put any stock in them. I don't think they have any value whatsoever. So you can thnk what you like. I stand by the number of people I have helped. You can believe what you want to believe because you are close-minded, and you wll do so anyway. Even if i trotted out all my degrees, certifications and licenses you would still go on attacking me and positions with the same exact intensity. Who are you fooling? You might have a better chance at making your point if you offered some sort of documentation or a link to studies that address your theories. Not to mention a degree in Psychology and training in survivor behavioral treatment....something. As it is, all you offer is quote: I know several dozen survivors who have tried this. All told me they felt better afterwards, that it was very theraputic for them. It's no different than me saying "Look, I've spoken with many people about using bee sting therapy to treat pain problems. I've tried it once or twice with a friend and done a lot of reading about it. How about I give it a shot with you? What's that? Medical training....Me? Well, no, but I've read a first aid book and own an epi pen." Shall I introduce you to my hive?

VaguelyCurious -> RE: Any survivor want to release anger (9/20/2010 11:37:19 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WhipTheHip Anyone here knows what Argumentum ad verecundiam means? I have credentials and licenses but I don't put any stock in them. I don't think they have any value whatsoever. So you can thnk what you like. I stand by the number of people I have helped. You can believe what you want to believe because you are close-minded, and you wll do so anyway. Even if i trotted out all my degrees, certifications and licenses you would still go on attacking me and positions with the same exact intensity. Who are you fooling? The problem is that the activities you claim to organise violate all sorts of ethical codes which would have been drummed into you had you really had medical training. Which is why I personally don't believe you.

ranja -> RE: Any survivor want to release anger (9/20/2010 11:38:45 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WhipTheHip I know survivors are supposed to repress and bottle-up their anger, and turn it inward where it becomes self-hate and leads to depression. I know it is dangerous to the psyche of a sub to take a flogger and release her anger on a bottom, because all subs are emotionally fragile things, but I am wondering if there are any survivors here who think they would be helped by taking out their anger on a male bottom? I've been a little facetious in my wording here. I don't think most subs are emotionally fragile, and I don't think it would hurt a sub to release her anger, but the last time I posted messages here everyone else thought it was morally wrong for a sub to release her anger this way. In any event, I am curious if there are any subs who think they could benefit from this. Things have happened to me and i have been in a victim position... my way of dealing with it was to think that i was pretty unfortunate and perhaps a bit stupid. It also became clear to me that i had trust issues even before the thing happened i have felt angry and pathetic but i have never had a need to take that out on another man... if i would have to force myself to be a domly type to spank some willing male bottom to get rid of my anger... i would feel i let myself be used again by some wanker, but maybe for others it would work. For me the understanding that i could have done things differently to protect myself was the biggest positive thing... i can forgive myself, i can be smarter, i can get over this thing... without any help from a man. Power to me!!! and i have no trust issues anymore

sexyred1 -> RE: Any survivor want to release anger (9/20/2010 11:39:18 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WhipTheHip Anyone here knows what Argumentum ad verecundiam means? I have credentials and licenses but I don't put any stock in them. I don't think they have any value whatsoever. So you can thnk what you like. I stand by the number of people I have helped. You can believe what you want to believe because you are close-minded, and you wll do so anyway. Even if i trotted out all my degrees, certifications and licenses you would still go on attacking me and positions with the same exact intensity. Who are you fooling? There is no degree or credentials that I am aware of that are awarded for lack of self awareness.

PeanutTigerinBox -> RE: Any survivor want to release anger (9/20/2010 11:45:30 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WhipTheHip PeanutTigerinBox quote: "survivors are supposed to repress and bottle-up their anger, Nope, I never said that either. I believe the exact opposite. Survivors are not supposed to repress and bottle up their anger. That is very unhealthy. Here is some helpful advice for those here who wish to attack me. First get my position straight so you can know what position to attack. Or you might end up like this poster accidently agreeing with me. Before you try to explain the rules to us about how to "attack" a person you better look at what you wrote as I quoted you...and FYI it does not matter what you say later within that paragraph, you did the statement that you would know that survivors are supposed blablabla... so before claiming that you would not have said something I quote you on, you better check the crap you gave earlier which is even to find very easily as it is the first post [sm=Groaner.gif] quote: I know survivors are supposed to repress and bottle-up their anger, and turn it inward where it becomes self-hate and leads to depression. I know it is dangerous to the psyche of a sub to take a flogger and release her anger on a bottom, because all subs are emotionally fragile things, but I am wondering if there are any survivors here who think they would be helped by taking out their anger on a male bottom? I've been a little facetious in my wording here. I don't think most subs are emotionally fragile, and I don't think it would hurt a sub to release her anger, but the last time I posted messages here everyone else thought it was morally wrong for a sub to release her anger this way. In any event, I am curious if there are any subs who think they could benefit from this. < Message edited by WhipTheHip -- 9/19/2010 7:59:35 PM >

SeparatedSub -> RE: Any survivor want to release anger (9/20/2010 11:46:29 AM)
Look, I'm not going to wave around my PhD in genetics (I have no clue where it is to be honest) as you cretins probably couldn't even read the Latin. But I am supremely qualified to draw the conclusion that women are inferior to men. There is really something to be said for the brevity of the Y chromosome. I'm not quite sure why women need two X's, one works fine. Oh my goodness - did that upset anyone? I can't understand why, but really, I have years of experience in sequencing genomes and you all will just have to take my word for it.

Toppingfrmbottom -> RE: Any survivor want to release anger (9/20/2010 11:53:16 AM)
You really, really have some potentially flawed and incorrect idea's there WTH. The difference for me, for allowing Daddy to hurt me and cause me pain if he wished to, is it's not done in anger, or out of angry motivation, it's done cause he loves me and wants to provide me with the masochistic things I love. And ironically because he does love me, he won't inflict pain on me. He says it's a very dangerous road to go down for him, because there's abuse in his past, an he finds it could lead to potentially abusing the love we have by enjoying hurting me more than he cares for my dislike of the stuff he's doing. For example if I am not horny and warmed up or willing to receive such painful swatts as he wants to deliver he'll do it anyway and it'll end up with me feeling abused. He spanks me and does things to me because I am a masochist, not from abuse, but because it makes me hot. I would not let him hurt me because he has negative angry demons to express and expel. And that's a very screwed up definition of why someone is called a masochistic bottom, because not all masochistic bottoms, want someone taking anger or negative demons out on them, just cause they're masochistic. I didn't work out my anger and hurt at being abused by getting psychical with something or someone, and I am not a cold hearted bitch who's incapable of loving someone. Nor am I emotionally abusive and taking my issues out on innocent bystanders. Nor am I a shrew, Nor do I need a dom because he'll put me in my place and I can't shrew him. You either are just pulling this shit out of your hat, with no knowledge or experience to back it up, or you've run into an awful lot of insane people who need mental help from a professional not a dom. quote: ORIGINAL: WhipTheHip Subs are so funny, it is okay for their Doms to inflict pain on them, but it is not okay for them to inflict pain on a masochistic bottom. You are worried you are going to hurt a masochist bottom my taking your anger out on him? Why do you think they are called masochistic bottoms. Survivors who dont release their anger by channeling it into physical activities like I described tend to be emotionally abusive, and vent their anger at innocent bystanders and those they love. Most subs who dont vent their anger physically tend to be unlovable bitches and shrews, that is why so many of them crave a Dom. Only a Dom can stop them being the true bitch and shrew they really are. They allow their Dom ot put them in their place. They know other males can't stop their bitchy shrewness.

WhipTheHip -> RE: Any survivor want to release anger (9/20/2010 12:22:44 PM)
ranja wrote: quote: my way of dealing with it was to think that i was pretty unfortunate and perhaps a bit stupid. I have tried to find a silver lining in every unfortunate thing that has happened to me in life. I believe most bad experiences can be sublimated. I think you are wrong to fault yourself. It is possible to do everything right, and still be a victim of circumstance. ranja wrote: "i have felt angry and pathetic but i have never had a need to take that out on another man." I have treated over 200 survivors and there was a point in every one of their lives when they wanted to see their perp get a taste of his own medicine. Normal human beings believe in poetic justice. Males have testosterone and generally direct their anger into physical and sexual aggression. Females tend to internalize their anger, where the anger truns into self-hate which leads to depression. I am happy that you were able to find the road to healing on your own. Others are not so fortunate. There are survivors in their 50s who have still not gotten over their childhood abuse.

WhipTheHip -> RE: Any survivor want to release anger (9/20/2010 12:27:04 PM)
Toppingfrmbottom quote: The difference for me, for allowing Daddy to hurt me and cause me pain if he wished to, is it's not done in anger, or out of angry motivation, You have misunderstood what I wrote. I never suggested Doms should act out of anger. If you want to think a sexual sadist inflicts pain on you out of love you can think so. If you think you found someone to flog you who does not get pleasure from it, well who am I to disabuse you of your cherished beliefs.

sirsholly -> RE: Any survivor want to release anger (9/20/2010 12:28:56 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WhipTheHip sexyred1 wrote: quote: You are using the word anger in conjunction with BDSM. Here is an experiment for you to try. Search females on collarme.com and see how many have the word anger or rage in their profile. I admit i am a bit curious here...you repeatedly focus on the anger issues of female submissives in relation to the BDSM lifestyle. I am wondering if you have noted the ratio of angry submissive females to angry submissive males? Negative emotions, repressed or otherwise, can hardly be considered gender specific, nor can it be exclusive to ones BDSM orientation. And that leads to my next question...what do you think the results are when compared to all profiles, irregardless of the orientation?

WhipTheHip -> RE: Any survivor want to release anger (9/20/2010 12:32:59 PM)
quote: Toppingfrmbottom Really Toppingfromthebottom, just because you think it is okay to steal money from your top, doesn't make it right, that is just screwed up. I don't know where you are getting the idea that it is okay to do this just because you are letting your Dom play with you. I would appreciate it if you would not attribute to me things I never said, and positions I do not hold.

Toppingfrmbottom -> RE: Any survivor want to release anger (9/20/2010 12:36:18 PM)
Who said I steal money from him? Daddy is generous with the money he lets me use, I have never needed to steal it from him. If I had mentioned money at all and I didn't. quote: ORIGINAL: WhipTheHip quote: Toppingfrmbottom Really Toppingfromthebottom, just because you think it is okay to steal money from your top, doesn't make it right, that is just screwed up. I don't know where you are getting the idea that it is okay to do this just because you are letting your Dom play with you. I would appreciate it if you would not attribute to me things I never said, and positions I do not hold.

Zevar -> RE: Any survivor want to release anger (9/20/2010 12:39:06 PM)
It has been my professional experience when studying a particular field of knowledge that theory without conclusive empirical evidence does nothing to prove a theory as fact. Until you have thoroughly studied the subject you have presented, tested the theory, proven facts in a scientific conclusive manner; then all you are doing is presenting fabricated human opinion. If you were the professional you allege to be there would have never been the length of empty arguments devoid of conclusive proof. You are not only embarrassing yourself in doing such but you also embarrass the professionals you claim to be a scholar among. Professionally speaking, I question your motive, disbelieve your shallow argument, disagree with your inconclusive outcome, challenge your theory and finally feel great compassion for someone who would make a public fool of themselves. Step away from the internal glib fantasy. You have concealed nothing. Tricked no one. You have only gained insurmountable disrespect. Do you not know what you are doing to your integrity in conducting yourself in such a manner? Yesterday you were implying to know how to practice Law & now you are attempting to get others to believe you are trained in the science of Psychology? Sad, truly sad indeed!

WhipTheHip -> RE: Any survivor want to release anger (9/20/2010 12:41:36 PM)
quote: I admit i am a bit curious here...you repeatedly focus on the anger issues of female submissives in relation to the BDSM lifestyle. I am wondering if you have noted the ratio of angry submissive females to angry submissive males? Negative emotions, repressed or otherwise, can hardly be considered gender specific, nor can it be exclusive to ones BDSM orientation. And that leads to my next question...what do you think the results are when compared to all profiles, irregardless of the orientation? Most male and female survivors were abused by males. This changes the dynamic for masochistic male bottoms. I have no experience treating masochistic male bottoms. I don't really know the answers to your questions. There are a lot of things I don't know. Because males have testosterone they are more likely to direct their anger and aggression outward. In any event, I wouldn't recommend any male vent his anger through BDSM because our society has a double-standard here. Society will not have any sympathy for such a male.

SeparatedSub -> RE: Any survivor want to release anger (9/20/2010 12:41:50 PM)
AMEN to that. And for all the agnostics and athiests, I'll go with WELL SAID. quote: ORIGINAL: Zevar It has been my professional experience when studying a particular field of knowledge that theory without conclusive empirical evidence does nothing to prove a theory as fact. Until you have thoroughly studied the subject you have presented, tested the theory, proven facts in a scientific conclusive manner; then all you are doing is presenting fabricated human opinion. If you were the professional you allege to be there would have never been the length of empty arguments devoid of conclusive proof. You are not only embarrassing yourself in doing such but you also embarrass the professionals you claim to be a scholar among. Professionally speaking, I question your motive, disbelieve your shallow argument, disagree with your inconclusive outcome, challenge your theory and finally feel great compassion for someone who would make a public fool of themselves. Step away from the internal glib fantasy. You have concealed nothing. Tricked no one. You have only gained insurmountable disrespect. Do you not know what you are doing to your integrity in conducting yourself in such a manner? Yesterday you were implying to know how to practice Law & now you are attempting to get others to believe you are trained in the science of Psychology? Sad, truly sad indeed!

BonesFromAsh -> RE: Any survivor want to release anger (9/20/2010 12:45:53 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SeparatedSub AMEN to that. And for all the agnostics and athiests, I'll go with WELL SAID. quote: ORIGINAL: Zevar It has been my professional experience when studying a particular field of knowledge that theory without conclusive empirical evidence does nothing to prove a theory as fact. Until you have thoroughly studied the subject you have presented, tested the theory, proven facts in a scientific conclusive manner; then all you are doing is presenting fabricated human opinion. If you were the professional you allege to be there would have never been the length of empty arguments devoid of conclusive proof. You are not only embarrassing yourself in doing such but you also embarrass the professionals you claim to be a scholar among. Professionally speaking, I question your motive, disbelieve your shallow argument, disagree with your inconclusive outcome, challenge your theory and finally feel great compassion for someone who would make a public fool of themselves. Step away from the internal glib fantasy. You have concealed nothing. Tricked no one. You have only gained insurmountable disrespect. Do you not know what you are doing to your integrity in conducting yourself in such a manner? Yesterday you were implying to know how to practice Law & now you are attempting to get others to believe you are trained in the science of Psychology? Sad, truly sad indeed! [sm=agree.gif][sm=goodpost.gif] especially the highlighted part.

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