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CallaFirestormBW -> RE: Do you expect your sub/slave to drop everything? (9/23/2010 11:57:37 AM)
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I can tell you how this would play out at our household. First, there would be a schedule in place, that would enable your time to be arranged so that projects like candlemaking and advertising would be taken care of, and so that youngsters would be cared for, fed, and supervised -- and if I wanted my servant to -be- someplace with me in the evening, I would make sure to arrange for child-care so that that could happen, as well as working within a schedule that would allow my servant to be properly rested and physically capable of doing whatever I chose.
That being said, in response to the OP, yes, sometimes I -do- require my servants to drop what they're doing, regardless of how important they think that it is, though, for me, it would be foolish to make a habit of it, since I have to clean up the messes that come out of doing so (my job, as the boss).
Sometimes, however, we make our lives much more drama-filled and create busy-ness to keep from having to inter-relate, and part of me wonders, from reading your post, whether that may be part of what is going on here. Deadlines are missed all the time in the real world, and even when we're diligent, things slip, and yet the world doesn't end. Plans change, and yet life manages to go on -- so making a huge issue out of changed plans sometimes hides other issues that have not been resolved, and which the workload is used to "cover up" and legitimize. I've learned myself, over the years, that there is virtually NOTHING that is going to complete disintegrate if we miss a deadline, or have to re-schedule. If inventory is low this weekend because the one to whom you answer required your attendance rather than spending the time building inventory, then he gets to accept that there won't be as high an income coming in from your business this weekend (including possibly having to make up a shortfall in overhead, if that is an issue, so that sufficient future materials which might have been paid for out of that additional income can be obtained). Those are part and parcel of the complexities of being in the position of leadership in a relationship. I get to say "drop what you're doing and get over here and do what I want"... but I'd better be prepared to either catch what will fall because I demanded that attention, or be prepared for the repercussions of letting that thing drop.
The thing is, it sounds to me like you're still, for the most part, holding on to the control of your life and your situation. That may be ok -- but it sounds to me like you're resisting this last little bit of giving up that control, and you need to ask yourself whether the world really -would- fall apart if you let go, or whether you're CREATING mountains (out of molehills) to avoid yielding in that last measure.
Calla
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