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RE: Suggestions for collarme - 10/6/2010 10:44:24 AM   
WyldHrt


Posts: 6412
Joined: 6/5/2008
Status: offline
quote:

With respect to ratings-
It strikes me that the idea of users conspiring is a bit paranoid. Furthermore, it's easily fixed- you're only allowed to rate a person's email once or assign them a single rating- hence no bumping by repeated mails.

You've obviously never had the pleasure of someone creating multiple usernames in order to get around being blocked by you. It's more akin to multiple online personality disorder than conspiracy, and it happens fairly often. With a 'rating system', each username would be able to blacklist...er... give another person a low rating for not answering their mail.

I also have to wonder how such a thing would work as regards the mail filters. Many people use them, and the filtered mail goes directly to the bulk folder. Most delete these mails unread. Should people get a low rating for using the mail controls made available on the other side?

As for women who don't answer cmails, many here start out answering all or at least most of their mail, but stop sending polite rejections sometime around the 100th 'I didn't want you anyway, you fat ugly whore!' reply. It never ceases to amaze me how some of the most polite first cmails are followed by the worst vitriol when you say 'Thanks, but no thanks'. Penalizing women who choose to avoid such unpleasantness by simply not replying to those they are not interested in or those who have obviously not read their profile hardly seems fair.

This is yet another reason that a 'rating' actually tells you nothing at all about a person. Thinking that someone immature enough to reply to a polite mail with a nasty insult will give an honest rating of the person who rejected them is a bit naive. There are also many cases where an exchange begins politely, but deteriorates rapidly after a few mails. Do you get to change the rating you gave when Mr/Ms.Nice turns into Mr/Ms.Shithead around the 4th cmail? How about when you find out that the 'single' person you are conversing with is actually married and cheating?

This idea has been brought up before, but there really isn't a way to make a 'rating' system that won't be abused in one way or another. As has been said, it is akin to blacklisting and I can't really see the staff wanting to deal with all the 'he said, she said' complaints that would likely result.


_____________________________

"MotherFUCKER!" is NOT a safeword!!"- Steel
"We've had complaints about 'orgy noises'. This is not the neighborhood for that kind of thing"- PVE Cop

Resident "Hypnotic Eyes", "Cleavage" and "Toy Whore"
Subby Mafia, VAA Posse & Team Troll!

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Profile   Post #: 61
RE: Suggestions for collarme - 10/6/2010 12:08:04 PM   
tiggerspoohbear


Posts: 19141
Joined: 6/27/2010
Status: offline 		One thing no one has pointed out is that for 4 pages now everyone has suggestions. So instead of posting them here, and I'm not saying this is wrong or right, why not send the suggestion to CM as they're asking for them. They can either work it out if it's feasible, or not if it's not. Or am I being a simpleton here (entirely possible) and people are actually sending their ideas in?

Juuuuuuuuuuuuuuuust askin..................

_____________________________

"RABBIT IS GOOD, RABBIT IS WISE".

"I'm a baaa-aaad pussycat".


(in reply to WyldHrt)
Profile   Post #: 62
RE: Suggestions for collarme - 10/6/2010 1:13:09 PM   
hertz


Posts: 1315
Joined: 8/7/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

~FR!

Hertz~

MY ADD may be kicking in.. but are you advocatiocating some sort of kicking of one liner POSTS on forums?


Yes, I am.

quote:

Because many of the best posts ARE one liners.. and some folks, like myself, only do one liners..


I agree. But most of the worst are also one-liners.

quote:

one liner emails from mst folks are ok.. annoying sometimes, yes.. fine from friends.. ok, from others (if one finds them witty)..


Again, I agree. But in the hands of someone with an agenda, they are really disruptive and poisonous.

quote:

I iz confuzzled..


It's only a debating point. I can see loads of problems with it as a blanket policy myself.

A compromise would be to delete any one liner, without question, when someone has complained. This would allow for witty and inoffensive replies to remain, and troublesome one-line attacks to be dumped without having to go through much in the way of Moderation. If it's had a complaint, and its one line, then out it goes...


(in reply to GreedyTop)
Profile   Post #: 63
RE: Suggestions for collarme - 10/6/2010 1:29:31 PM   
hertz


Posts: 1315
Joined: 8/7/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: tiggerspoohbear

One thing no one has pointed out is that for 4 pages now everyone has suggestions. So instead of posting them here, and I'm not saying this is wrong or right, why not send the suggestion to CM as they're asking for them. They can either work it out if it's feasible, or not if it's not. Or am I being a simpleton here (entirely possible) and people are actually sending their ideas in?

Juuuuuuuuuuuuuuuust askin..................


Personally, I find this sort of collaborative discussion quite useful. As you say, we could, as individuals, send our ideas in. In fact, I believe we have been asked to. But sometimes, our ideas are not as good as they seem to us, or might benefit from a tweak someone else can provide. Twenty heads working together on a problem might be better than twenty individuals making individual efforts. Maybe. (Uh-Oh! That sounds like Collectivism...)

(in reply to tiggerspoohbear)
Profile   Post #: 64
RE: Suggestions for collarme - 10/6/2010 1:36:29 PM   
diablarosa


Posts: 63
Joined: 10/3/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: hertz

quote:

ORIGINAL: tiggerspoohbear

One thing no one has pointed out is that for 4 pages now everyone has suggestions. So instead of posting them here, and I'm not saying this is wrong or right, why not send the suggestion to CM as they're asking for them. They can either work it out if it's feasible, or not if it's not. Or am I being a simpleton here (entirely possible) and people are actually sending their ideas in?

Juuuuuuuuuuuuuuuust askin..................


Personally, I find this sort of collaborative discussion quite useful. As you say, we could, as individuals, send our ideas in. In fact, I believe we have been asked to. But sometimes, our ideas are not as good as they seem to us, or might benefit from a tweak someone else can provide. Twenty heads working together on a problem might be better than twenty individuals making individual efforts. Maybe. (Uh-Oh! That sounds like Collectivism...)



My thoughts exactly. i think it's a better idea to engage in open conversation, as well as sending suggestions privately. We can do both.

(in reply to hertz)
Profile   Post #: 65
RE: Suggestions for collarme - 10/6/2010 1:42:13 PM   
diablarosa


Posts: 63
Joined: 10/3/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SaharahEve


quote:

ORIGINAL: diablarosa

I noticed collarme is looking for suggestions. A few thoughts of my own...

1. Give us users the ability to create and maintain our own chat groups, like on fetlife.

2. Give us more options for our profile orientations. Dominant, submissive, slave and switch just doesn't seem to be enough.

3. It would be cool to have more formatting control of our profiles.

4. Try to get rid of the spam and troll accounts.

Just off the top of my head...I'm sure I can think of more.



Not a bad. Like others here, I'm not particularly crazy about Fetlife's color choices; black and red is so BDSM cliché. I do believe Collar Me needs an upgrade, overall, however. I would list my suggestions, but then I already made a post about this very subject on my blog almost a week ago: http://saharaheve.com/blog/



Saharah Eve:

"Everyone wants to make a dime off their internet brainchildren, and it's perfectly reasonable for Collar Me to do the same. But as it stands now, your ad system can sometimes be a little too distracting. I for one don't like the image of a giant drooling twat stuffed by a fucking machine as a segue right before My bio text. Call Me picky. "

LMAO!!! But really, so true. I think the ads are one of the most annoying features on the site because of their placement. Ads are a necessity of internet life, so I'm not saying get rid of them. They just need to be scaled down a little and placed more tastefully...

(in reply to SaharahEve)
Profile   Post #: 66
RE: Suggestions for collarme - 10/6/2010 1:45:23 PM   
diablarosa


Posts: 63
Joined: 10/3/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: WyldHrt

This idea has been brought up before, but there really isn't a way to make a 'rating' system that won't be abused in one way or another. As has been said, it is akin to blacklisting and I can't really see the staff wanting to deal with all the 'he said, she said' complaints that would likely result.



I think your right, WyldHrt, the more I think about it. Rating systems can be abused. And yeah... there are plenty of creeps who will misuse it.

(in reply to WyldHrt)
Profile   Post #: 67
RE: Suggestions for collarme - 10/6/2010 8:31:17 PM   
Bella1965


Posts: 285
Joined: 12/12/2006
From: NYC
Status: offline 		G'evening all:



quote:

ORIGINAL: diablarosa
SaharahEve:
"Everyone wants to make a dime off their internet brainchildren, and it's perfectly reasonable for Collar Me to do the same. But as it stands now, your ad system can sometimes be a little too distracting. I for one don't like the image of a giant drooling twat stuffed by a fucking machine as a segue right before My bio text. Call Me picky. "

Could you warn a gal first? Jeez, now I have chocolate soy milk all over my screen. Thanks a lot.


Stay safe, play nice & share your toys w/ others...





Bella

_____________________________

Life shouldn't be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly shouting..."Wow! What a ride!

(in reply to diablarosa)
Profile   Post #: 68
RE: Suggestions for collarme - 10/6/2010 8:44:24 PM   
VideoAdminAlpha


Posts: 3876
Joined: 7/25/2008
Status: offline

_____________________________


You can't please all the people all of the time.Unfortunately there are times you cannot please any of them :( You can only do your best, and hope they realize that.

(in reply to tiggerspoohbear)
Profile   Post #: 69
RE: Suggestions for collarme - 10/6/2010 8:46:12 PM   
VideoAdminAlpha


Posts: 3876
Joined: 7/25/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: hertz

quote:

ORIGINAL: tiggerspoohbear

One thing no one has pointed out is that for 4 pages now everyone has suggestions. So instead of posting them here, and I'm not saying this is wrong or right, why not send the suggestion to CM as they're asking for them. They can either work it out if it's feasible, or not if it's not. Or am I being a simpleton here (entirely possible) and people are actually sending their ideas in?

Juuuuuuuuuuuuuuuust askin..................


Personally, I find this sort of collaborative discussion quite useful. As you say, we could, as individuals, send our ideas in. In fact, I believe we have been asked to. But sometimes, our ideas are not as good as they seem to us, or might benefit from a tweak someone else can provide. Twenty heads working together on a problem might be better than twenty individuals making individual efforts. Maybe. (Uh-Oh! That sounds like Collectivism...)



The thing is, only some of "us" are looking on these forums, and some of "us" that are involved in receiving from that link are not. There is some crossover, but it would be MUCH more effective to use the link......just sayin

_____________________________


You can't please all the people all of the time.Unfortunately there are times you cannot please any of them :( You can only do your best, and hope they realize that.

(in reply to hertz)
Profile   Post #: 70
RE: Suggestions for collarme - 10/6/2010 10:32:50 PM   
cloudboy


Posts: 7306
Joined: 12/14/2005
Status: offline
quote:

Not a bad. Like others here, I'm not particularly crazy about Fetlife's color choices; black and red is so BDSM cliché. I do believe Collar Me needs an upgrade, overall, however. I would list my suggestions, but then I already made a post about this very subject on my blog almost a week ago: http://saharaheve.com/blog/


You put forth an interesting commentary.

I like the CM message board b/c its straight-forward, simple, and easy to navigate. I like its antiquated look. I agree with you about the intrusive porn ads, and I don't know too much about the trolls and scam artists.

I don't know the root causes or fixes, but it has struck me that the message board seems in a rut -- and I think many threads get killed by a kind of cliquey, herd snarkiness and piling on. Sometimes all I need to read is the OP, and I know with 85% certainty where a thread is going.

From a personal standpoint, the posters that I had on my "favorites list" have almost all, across the board stopped posting. So, I've lost my guideposts for finding good discussions and observations. At least L&M returned. Sometimes I'm just reduced to searching domiguy's posts to see him go back and forth with his various targets for cross examination. Being an old fart, I've also found it difficult to connect with the new posters here. That's probably on me, though.

As for contrarian dicks, they are welcome in my world, provided they can defend logical positions. Impeachment is often better than sex....

I do invite you to post about your cyber-male experiences.

P.S. What gets me is how few screen-names I see in the various forums. It strikes me that the volume of readers has dropped here by 50%.

< Message edited by cloudboy -- 10/6/2010 10:41:54 PM >

(in reply to SaharahEve)
Profile   Post #: 71
RE: Suggestions for collarme - 10/6/2010 10:39:40 PM   
WyldHrt


Posts: 6412
Joined: 6/5/2008
Status: offline
quote:

LMAO!!! But really, so true. I think the ads are one of the most annoying features on the site because of their placement. Ads are a necessity of internet life, so I'm not saying get rid of them. They just need to be scaled down a little and placed more tastefully...

I use Firefox and have never seen an ad, giant drooling twat or otherwise, in the middle of a profile. FF keeps them politely to the side and bottom of the page. Fellow giantdroolingtwatpicphobics might want to try a change of browser.

~HelpfulWyld


_____________________________

"MotherFUCKER!" is NOT a safeword!!"- Steel
"We've had complaints about 'orgy noises'. This is not the neighborhood for that kind of thing"- PVE Cop

Resident "Hypnotic Eyes", "Cleavage" and "Toy Whore"
Subby Mafia, VAA Posse & Team Troll!

(in reply to diablarosa)
Profile   Post #: 72
RE: Suggestions for collarme - 10/6/2010 11:28:23 PM   
SaharahEve


Posts: 231
Joined: 6/25/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: cloudboy

quote:

Not a bad. Like others here, I'm not particularly crazy about Fetlife's color choices; black and red is so BDSM cliché. I do believe Collar Me needs an upgrade, overall, however. I would list my suggestions, but then I already made a post about this very subject on my blog almost a week ago: http://saharaheve.com/blog/


You put forth an interesting commentary.

I like the CM message board b/c its straight-forward, simple, and easy to navigate. I like its antiquated look. I agree with you about the intrusive porn ads, and I don't know too much about the trolls and scam artists.

I don't know the root causes or fixes, but it has struck me that the message board seems in a rut -- and I think many threads get killed by a kind of cliquey, herd snarkiness and piling on. Sometimes all I need to read is the OP, and I know with 85% certainty where a thread is going.

From a personal standpoint, the posters that I had on my "favorites list" have almost all, across the board stopped posting. So, I've lost my guideposts for finding good discussions and observations. At least L&M returned. Sometimes I'm just reduced to searching domiguy's posts to see him go back and forth with his various targets for cross examination. Being an old fart, I've also found it difficult to connect with the new posters here. That's probably on me, though.

As for contrarian dicks, they are welcome in my world, provided they can defend logical positions. Impeachment is often better than sex....

I do invite you to post about your cyber-male experiences.

P.S. What gets me is how few screen-names I see in the various forums. It strikes me that the volume of readers has dropped here by 50%.


Thank you, Cloudboy.

About the cliquey herd snarkiness (well put), I think I know what you're saying. Don't think Fetlife is without it's cool kids, though. People can be just as arrogant and snarky and tribal over there, too.

Good points about participation. Over the past few months I've noticed the same thing about conversation contribution here. It seems only the die hards and ice cream cone people are left at times. I don't care if it gets down to three people left here; I still love this place, though a little bit of renovation would do wonders.

And...post about my cyber male experiences? Pshh. You just want to know how I indoctrinated Amayos!


_____________________________

Saharah


S a h a r a h E v e . c o m

nanshakh.com



(in reply to cloudboy)
Profile   Post #: 73
RE: Suggestions for collarme - 10/6/2010 11:43:01 PM   
SaharahEve


Posts: 231
Joined: 6/25/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: WyldHrt
I use Firefox and have never seen an ad, giant drooling twat or otherwise, in the middle of a profile. FF keeps them politely to the side and bottom of the page. Fellow giantdroolingtwatpicphobics might want to try a change of browser.

~HelpfulWyld


I see them on all the browsers I use: FireFox, Safari, Opera, Explorer. Trick is, unregistered/logged out visitors perusing bios on the site will see that special feature. Sample below. Ok, no drooling twat this time; just a girl on all fours with a flogger in her mouth, but still...

Sample Ad

ETA: Photo was borked. Made a link instead. Goodnight!

< Message edited by SaharahEve -- 10/6/2010 11:49:56 PM >

_____________________________

Saharah


S a h a r a h E v e . c o m

nanshakh.com



(in reply to WyldHrt)
Profile   Post #: 74
RE: Suggestions for collarme - 10/6/2010 11:52:17 PM   
joshua69


Posts: 84
Joined: 2/19/2006
Status: offline 		My suggestion, more about Me.

(in reply to SaharahEve)
Profile   Post #: 75
RE: Suggestions for collarme - 10/7/2010 7:16:47 AM   
cloudboy


Posts: 7306
Joined: 12/14/2005
Status: offline
quote:

And...post about my cyber male experiences? Pshh. You just want to know how I indoctrinated Amayos!


No, he is a separate and probably compelling topic -- but on your site you said that you had surfed the net for about eight (8) months as a "male." For the record, I fully support such activities, and I was wondering how that went and what you learned from it?

quote:

I see them on all the browsers I use:


I agree, Firefox does not move or hide the Porn Ads from my CM surfing experiences. At this point, I tend to regard them as titillating wallpaper.

< Message edited by cloudboy -- 10/7/2010 7:21:09 AM >

(in reply to SaharahEve)
Profile   Post #: 76
RE: Suggestions for collarme - 10/7/2010 7:50:24 AM   
Acer49


Posts: 1434
Joined: 8/7/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: samboct

From my perspective- the major problem of this site- and this is known to some of the admin people- is that anonymity brings out some of the worst in people. There's been a downward spiral of rudeness and I suspect that some way to either reward people that respond to their emails or discourage those who send one liners is needed. I've been on sites where there are transactions taking place- and a user rating scheme of the transaction has helped clean things up terrifically. I keep toying with some kind of notion like that for this site. Finding a way to increase the number of positive interactions compared to negative interactions will bring fresh faces.

Sam


This sounds like black listing, which I am not in favor of, people can make their own determinations without any kind of list


_____________________________

Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself.
Harvey Fierstein

(in reply to samboct)
Profile   Post #: 77
RE: Suggestions for collarme - 10/7/2010 8:02:29 AM   
hardbodysub


Posts: 1654
Joined: 8/7/2005
Status: offline 		First a question, then a suggestion.

Q: the OP said
quote:

I noticed collarme is looking for suggestions.

Where was this? Other than this thread, I haven't seen anything. I'd just like to see what CM said to solicit suggestions.

My suggestion (my apology if it's already been mentioned. I read many but not all of the prior posts):

Do a little technical housekeeping to make CM work better for Mac owners using Safari or Firefox. I didn't realize that I had a browser issue until yesterday when someone commented that they could barely read my profile because of the black text on a dark blue background. I never even knew it had a dark blue background. It doesn't show up that way on Safari or Firefox. And I could do nothing on the "Edit Profile" page to change it in either of those browsers. I had to run Parallels to run Internet Explorer under Windows to see what was going on, and to access the color palette on the Edit Profile page. Pain in the ass.

(in reply to Acer49)
Profile   Post #: 78
RE: Suggestions for collarme - 10/7/2010 8:04:22 AM   
VideoAdminAlpha


Posts: 3876
Joined: 7/25/2008
Status: offline 		The link is on the scroll bar of the forums; when you see it, click it and you will be taken to a place where you can write your suggestion. There is also a link for volunteers for lots of the other areas in CM.

Edit to add: There is also a feedback link.

< Message edited by VideoAdminAlpha -- 10/7/2010 8:07:24 AM >

_____________________________


You can't please all the people all of the time.Unfortunately there are times you cannot please any of them :( You can only do your best, and hope they realize that.

(in reply to hardbodysub)
Profile   Post #: 79
RE: Suggestions for collarme - 10/7/2010 8:07:01 AM   
Acer49


Posts: 1434
Joined: 8/7/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: diablarosa

I noticed collarme is looking for suggestions. A few thoughts of my own...

1. Give us users the ability to create and maintain our own chat groups, like on fetlife.

2. Give us more options for our profile orientations. Dominant, submissive, slave and switch just doesn't seem to be enough.

3. It would be cool to have more formatting control of our profiles.

4. Try to get rid of the spam and troll accounts.

Just off the top of my head...I'm sure I can think of more.



If you want to make cosmetic changes to the site, that is fine, but do not kid yourself, people are leaving the site because they are tired of the individuals they have encountered,  and all the cosmetics in the world is not going to do anything to change that. I enjoy the forums, but after a while, it simply repeats itself. The few times I was on fet life, I found it a chore to maneuver.


_____________________________

Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself.
Harvey Fierstein

(in reply to diablarosa)
Profile   Post #: 80
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