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RE: The issue of pictures in profiles - 10/15/2010 8:54:59 PM

RedMagic1

Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Whew! Tell it, RedMagic!

Your friend, Hib

You need to come visit me once I move to Chicago! We can take sexy and mysterious coy photos of ourselves!

...and it was good timing that you posted. darkmatter viewed me just now. LadyHibiscus and I have met in real life, through CollarMe. (This seems to relate to a few threads on page one right now.) So it is possible to meet a real life (omg omg) female dominant, and be friends for a couple years now.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)

Post #: 21

RE: The issue of pictures in profiles - 10/15/2010 8:57:44 PM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

Chicago is in my plans as soon as finances allow! LUSHY, Jeff, and Domi are waiting. :)

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[page 23 girl]

(in reply to RedMagic1)

Post #: 22

RE: The issue of pictures in profiles - 10/15/2010 8:58:28 PM

RedMagic1

Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: poise

Please dont tell me that isnt your butt climbing that slope.

Of course it's me, ya silly sub-dame. I don't do false advertising. I'm looking for friends and kinkpartners, not drama.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to poise)

Post #: 23

RE: The issue of pictures in profiles - 10/15/2010 9:10:48 PM

darkmatter24

Posts: 34
Joined: 4/27/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1
OKCupid posted data after analyzing hundreds of thousands of profie photos. Pics with a face do *not* receive more responses than pics without a face. Pics that are sexy and mysterious receive way more responses than pics that are bland and drivers licency. Presence or absence of a face is irrelevant.

That's interesting, but that's not exactly what I am talking about. I can put up a picture of anything that is not me, but that doesn't address the issue I explained in the original post.

quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1
darkmatter, you sound to me like a passive-aggressive whiner, and that personality trait is more likely to stand in your way than any photo yoy may or may not post.

Lol, I respect your right to an opinion regardless of how dumb it may be.

quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1
I don't post a photo of my face, and I haver often received unsolicited email from women telling me how beautiful the waterfall in my pic is. If you are sooooo uncreative as to be unable to take a good photo of yourself that is face-free, you don't deserve to date any of my female friends, that is for sure. Stop pissing about like a little bitch and market yourself.

Regardless of your overreaching assessment of my creativity (or lack thereof) and an essential lack of good manners, I really would simply ask that you read with comprehension. Otherwise the conversation becomes a real chore.

Perhaps I wasn't clear enough saying 'profiles with pictures' when I meant profiles with pictures that show the face of the user. I thought that part was obvious, but perhaps I was wrong.

Seriously though, I merely suggested that perhaps many people around here overlook the fact that the strategy to finding somebody is a little bit different than on a dating site. As somebody else aptly noted, CollarMe is not the same as Match.com in the sense that routinely ignoring profiles without pictures (showing the person in some detail) increases the chances of running into somebody 'real'. It's almost the opposite given the social and professional implications of being 'found out'. No more and no less.

(in reply to RedMagic1)

Post #: 24

RE: The issue of pictures in profiles - 10/15/2010 9:11:16 PM

poise

Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

quote:

ORIGINAL: poise

Please dont tell me that isnt your butt climbing that slope.

Of course it's me, ya silly sub-dame. I don't do false advertising. I'm looking for friends and kinkpartners, not drama.

Whew.....I dont have to rework the fantasy then. Thank you kindly!

_____________________________

When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to RedMagic1)

Post #: 25

RE: The issue of pictures in profiles - 10/16/2010 2:01:48 AM

VaguelyCurious

Posts: 5264
Joined: 12/2/2009
From: United Kingdom
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: darkmatter24

Lol, I respect your right to an opinion regardless of how dumb it may be.

Haha! If there's one person on this board who gives good advice about how to get laid and/or navigate getting laid on the internet it's this man, darkmatter. If I were you I wouldn't brush him off so easily.

When people say 'a picture' they mean 'a picture'. Not necessarily 'a headshot' or anything that could identify you, but some kind of visual presentation of who you are and what you're about. I had a fuzzy, warmly lit one for a while that showed me lying on my stomach playing a boardgame surrounded by the remains of a party. You'd better believe that counted as a picture for most people, even though my hair was almost totally blocking my face and the little you could see was blurred by the lens.

The warm lighting made it look inviting and my position made me look relaxed-the photo told people viewing my profile some important things about me. Plus my top had ridden up at the back so if you looked carefully you could see a flash of bare skin.

Anyone who lacks the creativity to come up with *something* to display themselves isn't anyone I'd be interested in, no matter how important their job. Fuck it, even a lolcat's better than nothing...

<edited cuz my smiley went missing

>

< Message edited by VaguelyCurious -- 10/16/2010 2:03:26 AM >

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Sthetic on FetLife.

(in reply to darkmatter24)

Post #: 26

RE: The issue of pictures in profiles - 10/16/2010 3:36:16 AM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

Maybe I don't see the issues here. I post a face pic or two, and haven't had anyone recognize me from it in the vanilla world. If someone DID call me out on it, I would have two likely responses:

1. "Yeah. So?"
2. "Damn, you're right! He DOES look like me! What site were you on when you found that pic again?"

I work as an office grunt and keep any sexuality out of the workplace, and my coworkers do the same.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to VaguelyCurious)

Post #: 27

RE: The issue of pictures in profiles - 10/16/2010 4:30:25 AM

Twoshoes

Posts: 1218
Joined: 7/27/2010
Status: offline

'Amphiboly' is a funny word.
If all else fails, picture of shoes.

Edit: It's 8:00ish AM and I'm still awake, which means I'm coming up with words like 'conturnment' at an alarming rate.

Anyway, I'm sure a manipulative 3/4 camera angle and a talentsome shutterman could make me look spiffy despite feeling like I've been acquainted with a steamroller.

Hmm, immensely yellowsome steamroller. That would make a good profile picture!!!!

I better write this down for when the part of my brain that filters out terrible ideas throws all this out as 'puddlewash'.

Puddles - I like them. They don't "do", they just "are".

< Message edited by Twoshoes -- 10/16/2010 5:17:50 AM >

(in reply to DarkSteven)

Post #: 28

RE: The issue of pictures in profiles - 10/16/2010 4:41:21 AM

RedMagic1

Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: VaguelyCurious
even a lolcat's better than nothing...

Actually, that has real potential. "Mastr Gato iz in ur bedroom domnatng ur asz." If you run across a photo of a dominant cat, please let me know. I would love to have a photo that caused women to burst out laughing and at the same time think, "Wow, if he's that playful with his pictures, I wonder what he'll be like in bed."

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to VaguelyCurious)

Post #: 29

RE: The issue of pictures in profiles - 10/16/2010 4:43:25 AM

VaguelyCurious

Posts: 5264
Joined: 12/2/2009
From: United Kingdom
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

If you run across a photo of a dominant cat, please let me know.

Silly man. ALL CATZ iz dominate. Duh.

_____________________________

Sthetic on FetLife.

(in reply to RedMagic1)

Post #: 30

RE: The issue of pictures in profiles - 10/16/2010 4:44:38 AM

TotalDiscipline

Posts: 225
Joined: 5/5/2010
Status: offline

For talking I don't need a picture of that person in their profile.
For meeting I don't need one either in their profile..but I would ask one in my mail.

Pictures don't make a person better then the other.....often the opposite..

(in reply to darkmatter24)

Post #: 31

RE: The issue of pictures in profiles - 10/16/2010 4:47:03 AM

RedMagic1

Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline

No no no. For example there's this:

http://icanhascheezburger.com/2007/04/04/i-furgetted-safewurd/

but when I saw it (some months ago now) I thought "They are too cute-looking -- they must be fake"

I would need a "kneel bitch" cat.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to VaguelyCurious)

Post #: 32

RE: The issue of pictures in profiles - 10/16/2010 5:20:35 AM

Twoshoes

Posts: 1218
Joined: 7/27/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

No no no. For example there's this:

http://icanhascheezburger.com/2007/04/04/i-furgetted-safewurd/

but when I saw it (some months ago now) I thought "They are too cute-looking -- they must be fake" I would need a "kneel bitch" cat.

Cool cat that!

Also: "Awwwww".

(in reply to RedMagic1)

Post #: 33

RE: The issue of pictures in profiles - 10/16/2010 5:23:48 AM

VaguelyCurious

Posts: 5264
Joined: 12/2/2009
From: United Kingdom
Status: offline

Fine, fine, some of them switch occasionally. But to ALL HOOMINS THEY IZ DOMINATE!

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Sthetic on FetLife.

(in reply to Twoshoes)

Post #: 34

RE: The issue of pictures in profiles - 10/16/2010 6:27:10 AM

Kaliko

Posts: 3381
Joined: 9/25/2010
Status: offline

I guess I always thought that if someone says they want to see a picture in their profile before talking, that I could email a face picture of myself if I was to message them and that would be okay. That's what I always took that to mean. I would be comfortable with that. It's the posting on a public site like this that I simply can't do...there are actual policies at my job against it.

(in reply to darkmatter24)

Post #: 35

RE: The issue of pictures in profiles - 10/16/2010 6:57:25 AM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

Personally, I don't cruise profiles and I don't consider this a dating site. If it was a dating site, everybody would be looking to find someone, which isn't the case here. There are a lot of people on CM that aren't here to "date".

OP, it seems to Me that you want people to see just as much value in your profile that doesn't include a picture as those who do include a picture. That's not an issue. Everybody wants to feel that they have value. However, profiles with pics do get more attention. The site even allows for searching only those profiles with pics. Seeing some kind of image allows people to feel more connected. I'm not led to believe that you're going to get people to want to give up that feeling. I don't think it's a battle you can win.

Plenty of people post pics that are of themselves that it would be impossible to recognize them if they were walking down the street. A little creativity can go a long way in this area.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Kaliko)

Post #: 36

RE: The issue of pictures in profiles - 10/16/2010 7:16:52 AM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

I love the OkCupid trends! They have fun going through their database and providing users with pertinent info.

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“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to RedMagic1)

Post #: 37

RE: The issue of pictures in profiles - 10/16/2010 7:42:45 AM

Icarys

Posts: 5757
Status: offline

quote:

Haha! If there's one person on this board who gives good advice about how to get laid and/or navigate getting laid on the internet it's this man, darkmatter. If I were you I wouldn't brush him off so easily.

I wouldn't either because we know it's how many women you've sacked and how, that makes the difference in a man.

The guy just has to be persistent and be himself..No fancy preplanned intertwit tricks needed. If he's doing things just to get them into bed that is.

A good sense of humor once they're talking to you works fine for me when they know I actually want a long term relationship with them and I'm not just another guy who wants to get something from them.

_____________________________

submission - the feeling of patient, submissive humbleness - the state of being submissive or compliant; meekness.

Alaska Bound-The Official Countdown Has Started!
http://tinyurl.com/872mcu3
http://alturl.com/mog7m

(in reply to VaguelyCurious)

Post #: 38

RE: The issue of pictures in profiles - 10/16/2010 7:45:49 AM

Icarys

Posts: 5757
Status: offline

You've made some interesting points and I think most with half a brain recognizes them to be true with some people just not all people as I'm sure you are aware.

Welcome to the boards..stick around.

_____________________________

submission - the feeling of patient, submissive humbleness - the state of being submissive or compliant; meekness.

Alaska Bound-The Official Countdown Has Started!
http://tinyurl.com/872mcu3
http://alturl.com/mog7m

(in reply to darkmatter24)

Post #: 39

RE: The issue of pictures in profiles - 10/16/2010 8:01:57 AM

strangedesire

Posts: 360
Joined: 12/23/2008
Status: offline

I've never seen anyone who demanded that people communicating with them publicly posted face pics. I have seen numerous profiles that require a photo by email if you don't already have one. Personally, I think this is entirely legitimate.

Why? First, because if I'm looking for potential partners, there needs to be a possibility of real-time attraction. While there are people out there so jaw-droppingly wonderful that I don't care about appearances, they need to be able to put that wonderfulness out there very quickly. Your profile is nice and quite functional, but it's not personal enough to make me think that anyone would feel that way off the bat with you.

Second, and more importantly to me: Refusing to post one's photo publicly implies understandable levels of discretion. Refusing to send out photos, however, seems like paranoia. Is someone who knows you going to be hiding on this site with fake profile pictures, waiting to blackmail you? Do you think there are people out there who would be willing to publicly out themselves just for a chance to embarrass you? Are you totally incapable of uttering the words, "Oh, some guy stole my facebook picture. That's weird"?

At some point, if you want to meet people in real life, they're going to find out what you look like. If you won't show people what you look like, they will begin to suspect that you're too paranoid to meet in real life.

And if you're a US senator, or someone THAT high-profile, you shouldn't be using this kind of site. Too risky. (And aren't most senators married anyways?) If you're prone to making enemies on 4chan, step away from the internet RIGHT NOW, because those people will fuck you up. Otherwise? The odds of anything bad happening because you sent out a few photos are pretty minimal. And I say this as someone who used to work in a semi-public job, and was recognized on this site by a customer who tried to give me trouble. Anyone who thinks of "presence on a kinky dating site" as blackmail material will be too terrified to reveal how they found you there.

Final note: I don't put pictures of myself up because I think it will bring me wimmins. If I wanted to do that, I took some nice pictures of Machu Picchu a few years back that tend to spark conversation. I put out my picture to reduce responses: I want to weed out people who won't find me attractive before I waste time on them.

_____________________________

On that other site as Exegesis.

(in reply to darkmatter24)

Post #: 40

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