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misterbigg -> No responses! (10/17/2010 8:46:43 PM)
I spent countless hours refining my profile, and I took some recent photos. But even when I send messages (which are always polite and not copied and pasted) I rarely if ever get a response. I never send messages to fakes, they are really easy to spot. What's wrong??

lizi -> RE: No responses! (10/17/2010 8:59:46 PM)
I was going to give you a careful synopsis of what I got from your profile but there is something that I just can't get past immediately - even to see the rest of your profile. The multiple pictures of women you have posted. What is the purpose of that? From a woman's point of view it mystifies me that you have several pictures posted with various other attractive women. If I were a guy maybe I'd think you were a stud, but as the female type it really leaves me flat. Another thing...do all these other people in your pictures know their faces are on a kink site? You may want to reconsider your decision to put up pictures with other people in them - this isn't facebook and they might be a little ticked to find out where they've been so to speak. Pictures are good though, you may just want stick with ones of you.

Hillwilliam -> RE: No responses! (10/17/2010 9:13:47 PM)
I'm going to agree with lizi. Lose the pics of you and other women. Ladies HATE competition.

sexyred1 -> RE: No responses! (10/17/2010 9:24:48 PM)
It has nothing whatsoever to do with competition. It has to do with intent. Showing photos of multiple women ususally indicates either a player, or insecurity. If someone is truly interested in meeting someone, they would not include others in their photos, unless it was their animal pets.

DomMeinCT -> RE: No responses! (10/17/2010 9:28:45 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: misterbigg I spent countless hours refining my profile, and I took some recent photos. But even when I send messages (which are always polite and not copied and pasted) I rarely if ever get a response. I never send messages to fakes, they are really easy to spot. What's wrong?? I don't think it's a competition issue, so much as a consent issue: Do your friends/lovers/ex-partners know (and agree) that you've got their photos posted on CollarMe? It's remotely possible that anyone seeing all those people other than you might be wondering if you'll just fling their photo up next, with or without their acceptance. Ditch the pictures with anyone but you in them, then describe in your profile that you have a full/rich life with friends and how you enjoy your time.

sexyred1 -> RE: No responses! (10/17/2010 9:32:20 PM)
That was a way better response than mine, I did not think of the consent part. Of course, I would not want to be listed in someone's profile without permission and I would not grant it anyway.

rulemylife -> RE: No responses! (10/17/2010 9:34:50 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: misterbigg I spent countless hours refining my profile, and I took some recent photos. But even when I send messages (which are always polite and not copied and pasted) I rarely if ever get a response. I never send messages to fakes, they are really easy to spot. What's wrong?? I'm sorry but I can't respond to this.

stef -> RE: No responses! (10/17/2010 9:56:34 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: misterbigg I spent countless hours refining my profile, and I took some recent photos. But even when I send messages (which are always polite and not copied and pasted) I rarely if ever get a response. No response is a response, just not the one you were hoping for. They either saw something in your email, your profile or your photos that made them not want to reply. ~stef

saltie -> RE: No responses! (10/17/2010 10:23:40 PM)
Do you read the profiles before writting them? Most that write me do not. Some do read it but ignore what is there. I am clear on what I want, that this is for play only and the age if am I am looking. If to young or far I dont answer.

femasoslave -> RE: No responses! (10/17/2010 10:42:08 PM)
I agree with others about the photos you have of other women, it is completely unnecessary. Apart from that, I cannot find anything wrong with your profile. I have no idea why you havnt received any replies. Good luck

misterbigg -> RE: No responses! (10/17/2010 10:44:14 PM)
Thanks for the feedback. I only recently added the photos with other people in them. I got the idea in my head that maybe, I was coming across as too self-centered since every photo was just of me. No change in the results.

WolfyMontgomery -> RE: No responses! (10/17/2010 11:08:47 PM)
It's not wholly because of something they might find offensive. Often it is because a LOT of women here get tons and tons of emails (there's even a thread proving this somewhere lol), so many that it can be extremely time consuming to reply to every one of them. So after a woman takes a look at you, if she doesn't find you wholly compatible with her for some reason or another (maybe you have a kink she doesn't like, or she likes dark haired men instead of lighter haired men, or whatever) then she may just not reply because she doesn't have the time for it instead of letting you know she isn't interested. Other women are afraid to reply saying they're not interested, because some guys on here take that as an invitation to try and convince them that she should be, or will be rude and call her names because she said no. So it may not be due to you as a person, just their own choice in how they deal with people they see as incompatible with them. Don't worry about it, though it would be a good idea to remove any pictures of people you didn't ask if you could post. It just takes patience and finding a girl that fits you and that she thinks you fit her too. =)

MistressRosalyn -> RE: No responses! (10/17/2010 11:43:55 PM)
Yes, what all of them said. Without a doubt, dump the pictures of other women. That one friend of yours is kinda hot though, is he at all submissive? (Just kidding!) One other thing, since you are polite and very articulate, you might try hanging around on the message boards here. I often find that my interest in someone spikes once I get to know them a bit better. So perhaps the plethora of beautiful So Cal subbies on the boards here will be a bit more responsive once they get to know you. Either way, best of luck.

AquaticSub -> RE: No responses! (10/17/2010 11:50:54 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: misterbigg I spent countless hours refining my profile, and I took some recent photos. But even when I send messages (which are always polite and not copied and pasted) I rarely if ever get a response. I never send messages to fakes, they are really easy to spot. What's wrong?? Well... I was flipping through your pics and... why all the other chicks? Are they girlfriends? Play partners? Friends? If we were to hang out would I end up on there? The other pics are good - just try to lose the ones with others. The pictures of just you are awesome enough on their own. That said - if you just added the other pics and adding them hasn't changed the results, perhaps it's something in your approach. While you consider your messages polite, it's possible they aren't coming across as you intend them to. Perhaps run a few by female friends just to get their responses?

WolfyMontgomery -> RE: No responses! (10/18/2010 12:20:54 AM)
OH! Another thing to consider: If your messages have anything to do with sex, or if a large portion has to do with sex, try tossing all of that out. A lot of girls get turned off by people who start talking about what they expect/want in the bedroom right off the bat. It annoys them that you see them as sex-toys first and women second kinda thing. Try just pointing out a vanilla like that they have that is similar to yours, and running with that - you might find more girls respond to that as well.

subangel213 -> RE: No responses! (10/18/2010 2:24:55 AM)
Make sure it is obvious the message isn't copy and pasted. I never reply to those. Also don't ask questions that are answered in her profile. That makes you look like a jerk that won't take two minutes to read what she haas to say

VaguelyCurious -> RE: No responses! (10/18/2010 2:34:35 AM)
I'm sorry, OP, but 'polite' doesn't cut the mustard. You've got to be entertaining, engaging, attractive... If it wasn't your photos (pre-nonconsenting women) and it isn't your profile (I'm trusting the others when they say it's fine) then it must be your messages. How are you structuring them? When I was looking I used to go with a paragraph about the things in her profile that motivated me to message her, followed by a paragraph about why I thought we'd be a good match, followed by a one-line joke and a smiley. Not more than a few hundred words, not too much effort to write and not too much effort to read. Full of jokes and light humour. I got a pretty good response rate, but then I'm a woman, which makes things easier.

jbcurious -> RE: No responses! (10/18/2010 4:26:42 AM)
I agree with the rest of the ladies regarding the photos of other women... the rest of the advice I don't agree with. In reading your novel, I mean profile, it seemed like you were trying to hard to impress, so much of what you wrote could be summed up in a couple of sentences leaving the details to the getting to know you stage. Why not try just being yourself? It may not appeal to the masses but it will appeal to someone who is actually a match for you.

sexyred1 -> RE: No responses! (10/18/2010 9:34:20 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: VaguelyCurious I'm sorry, OP, but 'polite' doesn't cut the mustard. You've got to be entertaining, engaging, attractive... If it wasn't your photos (pre-nonconsenting women) and it isn't your profile (I'm trusting the others when they say it's fine) then it must be your messages. How are you structuring them? When I was looking I used to go with a paragraph about the things in her profile that motivated me to message her, followed by a paragraph about why I thought we'd be a good match, followed by a one-line joke and a smiley. Not more than a few hundred words, not too much effort to write and not too much effort to read. Full of jokes and light humour. I got a pretty good response rate, but then I'm a woman, which makes things easier. And you are VC, which is fab in itself! [;)]

sweetsub1957 -> RE: No responses! (10/18/2010 11:21:06 AM)
~FR~ I see that the OP has lost the pictures of other women. Good move. ~sweetsub~

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