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Jaybeee -> RE: Being in love with a slave - can a man maintain authority? (10/22/2010 10:40:38 PM)
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ORIGINAL: Zevar
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ORIGINAL: Jaybeee
Hi, this question is ONLY to Masters, not mistresses or slaves, please (although if I've PM'ed you this link, then you're here by prior invitation regardless of status and so I DEFINITELY want your considered opinion). I've "Asked a Slave" a similar question and the results were pretty uninformative, so with that refinement in mind, here goes!
Do you see any conflict between how much love/affection you can lavish on a slave, and your dominance over her? If you are IN love, do you think there's a point at which too much lovey-dovey stuff, if it starts to cut into the 'stern' times, will lead to a loss of authority? This actually hasn't been my experience in the two relationships I've had since I dropped the whole societal bs about me wanting to be in an "equal" partnership; I've led and so far, I'd gotten the mix correct. But I can't say I was IN love either time; I get the feeling all the rules will be tossed out the window when I'm head over heels.
I ask this because, at heart, I'm a kind leader. I'm quite aware that from time to time, obedience MUST be blind without , authority must be stamped without tolerance of delay but on the whole, I wish to lead with transparency and with caring; I'm not a dictator. So - what have your experiences been, striking a balance between being in love with your slave, and being a Master?
I look forward to your thoughts, gentlemen (and a couple of dear ladies too!)
Jaybeee.
Greetings Jaybeee:
Greetings and top of the morning to you, good sir!! Always a pleasure to converse with a good Irishman of learning!
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To begin I can appreciate you wanting input from those who identify as a master.
Nonetheless, it is my understanding that ANYONE can contribute in ANY forum on ANY thread on CM.
Oh I'm not disappointed in the slightest, when one raises the topic of 'love', it's quite the red rag, and one expects hordes of the fairer sex to charge !! And a couple of non-invitees have proven to be very welcome participants indeed. Pearls, they are.
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I will now present my answers’ in regard to the following questions you asked:
1] Question: Do you see any conflict between how much love/affection you can lavish on a slave, and your dominance over her?
1] Answer:
I do not see a conflict so much as I realize that I have no real interest in lavishing love toward slave who I would allow to serve me. My dominance is immutable. Therefore nothing is capable of producing conditions that would bring about conflicting issues in my ability to rule in all instances.
Love is not an affliction that it could cause me to lose control. Instead it allows me to be in control in a deeper way than I thought possible. Thus my self mastery is enhanced by my efforts of mastering my abilities to control my inner most unseen being in a strengthened focused manner.
Intriguing that you link self-mastery with mastery over her. But if I may clarify the above, do you not feel or display love for your slave?
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2] Question:If you are IN love, do you think there's a point at which too much lovey-dovey stuff, if it starts to cut into the 'stern' times, will lead to a loss of authority?
2] Answer:
Love is not a power that weakens my inner strength. I do not lose control over my mental capabilities when I am affectionate. Thus losing authority is not an option as I do not think along the lines of being able to lose what is naturally mine. But then I am 99% of the time intellectual when I master. 1% of the time I am inclined toward the emotional realm, when mastering.
While I don't wish to share your ratios, I do envy your self-control, that is something I aspire to.
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3] Question: So - what have your experiences been, striking a balance between being in love with your slave, and being a Master?
3] Answer:
Again, my ability to master is not weakened nor am I incapacitated in my capacity to master when I choose to love. I strive to balance all I do, regardless of its nature. I am of the thought that if one is a master, there is nothing to remove the internal self mastery within a master, with the exception of self disgrace. But then that would only serve to be for a period of time. Mastery is not something that is bought or acquired from another. Instead mastery is something that comes from within, where the uncompromising standards that contribute to a man reside.
Through self mastery and self examination mastery can only become strengthened, thus increasing the capacity of mastering. Loving a slave has nothing to do whatsoever with the internal realm where self mastery originates and resides. Balancing is natural as is dominance, in the natural order of Life.
Thus to consider that love cancels authority is likened to considering the wave being unrelenting to the shoreline. Regardless how powerful the lashing of the wave, the earth yields in beauty, all awhile balancing into a most perfectly formed shoreline. As though it was untouched yet somehow never the same.
I wish you most well!
Ahhh, there it is, that wonderful Celtic intermingling of passion and logic, so tragically rare in Anglo-Saxon society. This is why I never lose an opportunity to converse with any fellow of learning from the Emerald Isle and you, my good sir, have raised the bar your compatriots had already set quite high! A pint of Guinness, or glass of Jameson's to you tonight, on my tab!!
[:)]
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