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LadiesBladewing -> RE: For those who use 3rd person speak... (4/26/2006 4:47:50 PM)
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Properly used, third-person speech does not have to butcher the English language, nor does it have to be difficult to understand or annoying. I actually use it in areas not related to anything in the lifestyle, because professional technical documents and academic papers are always written in the 3rd person.
When I first started using 3rd-person speech, it was part of my monastic training, as I studied for my ordination, and, eventually, for my extended studies as a Justiciar for our Order. I learned many things about the value of separating oneself from situations through neutral, carefully structured language. When I came into the lifestyle, 3rd person speech was already something I was familiar with, including the self-discipline and focus that it required. During my years in service, I spoke in 3rd person at all times, used it in all written communication including internet, and used it publically as well (even with family and friends). Of course, my family and friends had already been exposed to it (and to periods of absolute silence lasting as long as a month at a time) as part of my spiritual disciplines, so nobody was horribly freaked out by it. My employers even provided me with work that I was able to do under the constraints of language and silence required -- and it was respected by my co-workers (yes, I worked for a wonderful and very unusually open company at the time... it wouldn't be possible in the job and with the company that I'm with now.)
For our servants who are charged to use 3rd-person speech, they are required to use it in all formal and casual conversations within the House, and in public as well. They are required to use it in all written and internet conversations, and in all public venues unless excused, though depending on their circumstances, they may be excused from using it at work, and may be excused from using it around family members (though it is much more likely that they will have limited contact with individuals who are not supportive of their life-choice while they are required to maintain that level of discipline. It isn't a permanent discipline in our House, and not every servant is required to go through it).
I can understand that some people may get annoyed with those who use 3rd person speech, especially because so many who use it do not bother to learn how to use it with any grammatical accuracy. It would be my suggestion that, for those who are assigned to use 3rd person speech, they do everything in their power to learn how to use it correctly and gracefully. To me, that would be a -big- part of the discipline of using it in the first place. Then, I would say to those who insist on being annoyed that, perhaps, they might want to consider that their annoyance is, in a way, a form of laziness -- they don't want to take the time to interpret what people are saying... they'd rather have it be -easy- to hold a conversation than to respect the discipline that the individual using 3rd person speech is attempting. Even if they are attempting it with poor grammar, at -least- they are making the attempt to do something that is challenging and that requires thought and dedication.
That being said, this abbess wishes each and every one of you a pleasant and worthwhile evening.
Lady Zephyr
quote:
ORIGINAL: valeca
...I have three questions.
How many of you, Dom* and sub alike, use it in real life? I've seen some people get very defensive about their use of it along with the explanations as to why it's used, and it made me wonder if it is, in fact, a part of their dynamic or off-line personalities.
For those whose reasoning is because they're told to use it by their Dominant, does this same order apply when speaking off-line?
And finally, how many, if any, have used it in a public setting?
*I recognise that the number of Dominants who use it is significantly less than their submissive counterparts, but I have seen it used.
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