RE: I know a scammer on the site (Full Version)

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LadyConstanze -> RE: I know a scammer on the site (11/18/2010 8:42:29 AM)

What I don't like in LA is the fake friendliness that you find there very often and that you have to drive everywhere, for me civilization is having public transport. LA has lovely corners and I have several friends who live there, I like it a bit better than I used to, but it's one of the places where I don't mind leaving.

LA is sort of a world of its own, my luggage once got delayed and I needed a dress for an evening event so I just went to a boutique, very helpful shop assistant, she helped me in and out of dresses and then the clincher "Who did your boobs? They look marvelously real..." Which kind of sums up LA for me, everything needs to be plastic.

I guess your attitude towards driving is different than mine, I enjoy fast cars or bikes and speeding with them, but there is a difference doing a little tour for fun and speed and driving several hours. I prefer to just getting on a plane instead of being stuck behind a wheel for hours and (oh horror of all horrors) read a map!



RapierFugue -> RE: I know a scammer on the site (11/18/2010 8:53:40 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze
I guess your attitude towards driving is different than mine, I enjoy fast cars or bikes and speeding with them, but there is a difference doing a little tour for fun and speed and driving several hours. I prefer to just getting on a plane instead of being stuck behind a wheel for hours and (oh horror of all horrors) read a map!


Yes I love road trips. Air travel drives me round the bend these days, unless it's short hops like London-Carcassonne or London-Milan. And even then I prefer the driving of the rental car that follows.

And the advent of sat nav now means no more map reading hassles, and no more nightmares finding small roads in French & Italian villages (where they often save on local taxes by not bunging street name signs up). Not to mention not getting lost in Italian cities (an old hobby of mine from way back). Plus you can choose whether to go the scenic route, or blat down the autoroute/autostrada.



LadyConstanze -> RE: I know a scammer on the site (11/18/2010 9:04:00 AM)

Well, the whole security stuff for air travel is a bit ridiculous but again, that's a loss less inconvenient than the whole driving through foreign traffic, especially since most of the rest of the world drives on the proper right side of the road and in Britain you get that nasty habit of driving on the wrong side... How much easier to take cab to the airport, fly, arrive, take cab to hotel, take shower, go to business meeting... or if it's in the spare time, explore the city by walking, I adore cities where I can just walk around or hope on public transportation, then explore some more. Each time I tried to walk in LA a car stopped and asked if my car has broken down, they couldn't believe somebody would walk just because they like it...



RapierFugue -> RE: I know a scammer on the site (11/18/2010 9:46:07 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

Well, the whole security stuff for air travel is a bit ridiculous but again, that's a loss less inconvenient than the whole driving through foreign traffic, especially since most of the rest of the world drives on the proper right side of the road and in Britain you get that nasty habit of driving on the wrong side...


Britain, Japan and Australia, actually, to name but three, IIRC.

And it's the correct side. Most people are right handed. You should always have your strongest hand on the wheel. So you should be changing gear with your left hand. Ergo, the correct side of the road to drive on is the left. Not that I mind driving on the right anyway, although for the first 200 miles I tend to switch on the sat nav's "remind me which side of the road I'm supposed to be driving on when I switch the car on" feature, so it pipes up when I come out of their (excellent, clean, inexpensive, delicious food filled) motorway services.

And I enjoy driving in foreign traffic. In the UK the Law see me as something of a "overly keen speed merchant", whereas in a) France I'm more sober than 95% of the other drivers and in b) Italy I'm not even in the top 50% of nuttiest drivers. I love driving abroad.

Oh, and this is a huge plus; from about a third of the way into France southwards (i.e. the bottom 2/3rds) Plod don't use helicopters, and their POS French patrol cars usually run out steam around 120 mph. Therefore even if they do request your presence at the side of the road you can play your "au revoir" card and fuck off into the distance. Ditto their bikes; they generally use BMW K (or sometimes R, which are even slower) series, which struggle to top 140 with all the cop kit on, whereas your average Japanese litrebike (and mine is far from average) doesn’t get breathless this side of 180. Oh and there’s no reciprocal European legal traffic framework (yet), meaning that, even if by some miracle they do manage to get your number, there’s very little they can actually do about it. They can huff and puff and send letters, but they're totally impotent.

So long as you tone it down within 2,000 metres of the Péage booths (which they kindly signpost), where they like to sit in the bushes with laser guns, you’ll be fine – people think Péage tickets are timed but they’re not; it’s merely the guys with laser guns radioing ahead.

I consider European roads my playground, and with good cause.



PeonForHer -> RE: I know a scammer on the site (11/18/2010 10:09:24 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: RapierFugue
. . . . and in b) Italy I'm not even in the top 50% of nuttiest drivers. I love driving abroad.


I've heard about the motorists in Rome.  It's supposed to be hilarious to see, so long as you're watching through a telescope. 



RapierFugue -> RE: I know a scammer on the site (11/18/2010 10:42:31 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

quote:

ORIGINAL: RapierFugue
. . . . and in b) Italy I'm not even in the top 50% of nuttiest drivers. I love driving abroad.


I've heard about the motorists in Rome.  It's supposed to be hilarious to see, so long as you're watching through a telescope. 


It's great fun , but it's not as crazy as it's painted most of the time because traffic so bad there that no-one (not even the Italians) can get up to any reasonable speeds. Personally I think they're crazier in Torino but for god's sake don't say that to a Roman, coz they're very proud of their driving.

A few highlights of my continental driving "career":

a) Doing 160 mph down the autostrada in a sports saloon ... and being flashed to move over by a Quattroporte, who came through doing something north of 180. Plod followed, on full disco, about 10 seconds later, trying manfully to catch him, but failing dismally.

b) driving out of Torino, I tacked on behind 2 women wearing what I took to be burqas, in a brand new Fiat Cinquecento. They were driving like loons - the poor little Fiat was being leant over at crazy angles as it tried to get them round corners at the speed they'd decided was "safe". I was impressed. I was even more impressed when, reaching the outskirts and getting onto the dual-carriageway, they pulled over and let me past (Italian road manners are generally excellent, as long as you remember the entire place is one giant race track) and as I overtook them in a sports saloon at about 130 I looked across and saw ... 2 nuns [sm=applause.gif]

c) Being chased (while in a car) by a very keen French police car for some 40 Km, somewhere around the centre of France. Every time I got away the traffic built up, and I won't take silly risks, so had to slow. Eventually, concerned I was getting too close to the end of the Péage (where they'd be able to radio on to have the barriers locked to prevent my escape) the traffic opened up and I really opened the taps. About 10 seconds later their POS Peugeot's engine expired in a cloud of steam and smoke [:D]

d) having a rental Fiat booked back in with a certain well-known rental company as "excellent condition" when in fact I'd blown the engine to bits about 2 miles down the road (it had had a lean, hard week, poor thing) and had had (with 2 mates helping) to push the thing in. As it turned out the rental place manager (being Italian) didn't give a flying fuck. "You shouldda called me, I'd ave come and got you! Eets too ot to push bloody car!" Bless him.

e) getting lost (pre sat nav days) in Northern France and accidentally crashing into a field, then pushing on through said field (too boggy to stop), out the other side, through a hedge, to find I'd just gone straight through the back garden of the hotel I was booked into. I knew it was the right hotel coz I'd wiped out their sign in the garden. I got bonus points for walking calmly to the rear desk and casually asking the boggled concierge if it was too late for lunch? (I got a bollocking ... followed by an excellent lunch).

f) Complaining about the gear-change on a newly picked-up rental Fiat and watching in amazement as the manager, demonstrating it was fine, had the gearbox fall half out while changing gear, onto the road, taking the gearstick with it, out of his reach. Sodding loud noise, that. Him: "fucka me! Is'a fucked!" Cue upgrade.

g) Breaking down late one afternoon in northern Italy, due to a fucked reg/rec unit on my then Kawasaki. Breakdown bloke comes out, explains "issa fucked mate", takes one look at my downcast face, and says "but I'm just off to a party - you wanna come? Issa be good!". So I go to a fantastic party in a little villa, then on to a nightclub his mate owns, then (pissed as a fart) crash at nightclub, in one of the backrooms (with some lovely Italian female company). The next morning he wakes me by bringing me coffee and a pastry, then drives me to the local Kwak spares place, fixes my bike, and sends me on my happy way.

etc, etc ... I could go on for hours, and frequently do.



undergroundsea -> RE: I know a scammer on the site (11/27/2010 6:01:36 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: strangedesire
quote:

ORIGINAL: undergroundsea
a number of otherwise legitimate dominant women ask for a tribute as a gesture of sincerity

Really, who does this? Why would you want to narrow your dating pool down to people dumb enough to send cash to strangers?


I invite you to browse profiles as if you were a submissive man looking for a dominant woman and I am sure you will come across such profiles. In some cases, the wording is not in the profiles and this demand is placed after exchanging some emails.

Also, in this thread itself there is talk of a seemingly genuine dominant woman who would ask for a monetary tribute saying it was her way to weed out flakes. There have been various threads in the past where some dommes posted they have such a policy and defended it. In her case the amount was $1. It is usually a larger amount. Also, I expect that some of the negative response she got, even though the amount was small, was because the approach she used is shared by scammers--it was not so much the amount but the concept and principle.

Because some genuine dominant women and some seemingly genuine dominant women make this demand, it becomes more understandable that a given sub might have agreed to it.

quote:


My point is that any adult who can't read should not even be able to log onto this site, this site is exclusively for adults.


quote:

let's face it, if she wanted to get rich from it, she'd have to put in a lot more work than actually just working, it simply took care of guys with multiple identities and no desire to follow through. People tore into her for being a scam artist, obviously $1 seems to be a fortune for some...


Above, the first quoted text suggests men should not send money and is critical of ignoring the warning to not send money to others. The second quoted text suggests they should send money to demonstrate they are sincere. It is this type of mixed message which creates the confusion and lessens the power of the CollarMe warning.

I have had some difficulty with this thread and see a double standard, which offends me at some level. There exist issues that each men and women face on this board. There is a difference in the general response when men rant about a commonly faced issue versus when women rant about a commonly faced issue.

Scams do exist. It is unfortunate that they exist. And I always side with the person deceived. I do so when it is an old lady who signed a check to a conman who came to sell something at her door. And I do so when it is a sub who sent money to a domme and it turned out to be a scam. It must be frustrating for someone to be told their problem is trivial, does not really exist, or if it happens it must be their fault.

I invite folks to think about what would lead someone to fall for a scam. A scammer places before them something they might want and then preys on their trust or unmet want. I think it is understandable that one might try to trust, or one might take a chance for sake of hope to feed the unmet want. I don't think doing either is so wrong that on top of the injury from the scam they should be insulted and told they are dumb. If one wants to tell them to use better judgment next time, fair enough. Can it be done in a more compassionate or respectful manner? Saying it the way it has been said feels disrespectful similar to how it would be if a woman who was deceived and used sexually was then called stupid for being deceived, or if one said something similar to a domme who went to meet someone who she thought was genuine and it turned out he was not.

Cheers,

Sea



GreedyTop -> RE: I know a scammer on the site (11/27/2010 11:14:36 PM)

~FR~

I wanna road trip with RF... .



october77777 -> RE: I know a scammer on the site (12/3/2010 9:14:53 PM)

Maybe I am cynical, but this thread started with someone simply asking if they process they used to notify the site about a scammer was correct, and they somehow wound up getting flamed (and repeatedly).  Someone even accused the person reporting the scam as being partially responsible for the scam since he or she got duped.  It seems to be a strange social phenomenon where no matter how you start a thread, someone will inevitably tell you how stupid you are.  Its like hiding behind a keyboard makes everyone a complete ***hole; aggressive for no reason and with no point.

I think if someone starts a thread even with something as innocuous as "Hey how is everyone's day?" someone will tell them its none of their damn business or it's their own fault for not knowing or something stupid like that.

Why is that?



CountrySong -> RE: I know a scammer on the site (12/3/2010 10:02:47 PM)

OP [image]http://www.collarchat.com/micons/m21.gif[/image]Hey report the scammer to me. I just love messing with scammers. It's my hobby!
They trust in an effot to get money.[sm=duel.gif]I counter and parry with a request for information - the obit for their not dead former Dom who sadly died of cancer or maybe the court case number for their former Dom who is now in jail because the neighbor reported him for abuse. They dodge and counter with a hearty "what are you and internet stalker" or a pitiful sobbing "you need to trust me master."

[sm=fight.gif]The battle of wits rages on. (Okay I will admit that most quite after a short time and are only half-wits.) But, a few valiently struggle on desperately hoping to gain a few dollars.

Sometimes the game goes on for days and once we made it last for almost two weeks. Ahh - the memories of that one![sm=hearts.gif]

All in all I find it highly amusing. If fact I think I'll go find another one just for fun. Let's see slaves, looking for every type of person, with no real info on their profile, hot bodies, and looking for older, balding, fat guys with some money. Wow that was easy and look there are 10 pages of them. PARTY!!!



vancraft -> RE: I know a scammer on the site (12/3/2010 10:15:04 PM)

this reminded me of a cracked article of a guy messing with a scammer. http://www.cracked.com/article_16234_having-fun-with-419-scammers.html

just copy paste it, the link is being a dick [:@]



LadyConstanze -> RE: I know a scammer on the site (12/4/2010 4:33:31 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: undergroundsea

Because some genuine dominant women and some seemingly genuine dominant women make this demand, it becomes more understandable that a given sub might have agreed to it.

quote:


My point is that any adult who can't read should not even be able to log onto this site, this site is exclusively for adults.



quote:

let's face it, if she wanted to get rich from it, she'd have to put in a lot more work than actually just working, it simply took care of guys with multiple identities and no desire to follow through. People tore into her for being a scam artist, obviously $1 seems to be a fortune for some...



Above, the first quoted text suggests men should not send money and is critical of ignoring the warning to not send money to others. The second quoted text suggests they should send money to demonstrate they are sincere. It is this type of mixed message which creates the confusion and lessens the power of the CollarMe warning.

<snip>

I have had some difficulty with this thread and see a double standard, which offends me at some level. There exist issues that each men and women face on this board. There is a difference in the general response when men rant about a commonly faced issue versus when women rant about a commonly faced issue.

<snip>






Sea,

you have always problems if BDSM is not the way you want it to be.

Now apparently a woman who asks for $1 to show that you are a real person who won't waste her time, that you are not somebody with is the same as a scammer, oh if you do have a problem with that, hand me an onion so I can shed a tear for you.

If you don't get the difference between $1 to verify you are a real person who doesn't have multiple identities and writes to you on several accounts and somebody who tries to get money out of you, I'm not sure it's a good idea to be let out of the house without a keeper. Seems that only guys are allowed to complain about time wasters, the women, oh they deserve it.

I seriously have a problem with your double standard and frankly with you coming across like a hypocrite.

And nope, I never asked for as much as $1, but if I would and somebody would throw a Paddy about the scam, I would gladly give them $1 in small coins and invite them to insert such coins. Btw if you would like to send me a donation of $1, just say so...



CountrySong -> RE: I know a scammer on the site (12/5/2010 3:34:32 AM)

Yeh Haw, I just got another scammer! That was so much fun! It looks like Indiana is heating up with the scammers again. There used to be a whole nest of them there a couple of years ago. All with former masters who died of cancer.
The moment you offer to go meet them they get cold feet and want to have you send them $650 so they can come and be your no limits slave. [sm=car.gif] Yeah right!!! (By the way that was not the only red flag. there where others. No cam, no pic, no phone and could not reach a pay phone to use a cheap calling card I would have given her, in a licensed profession but no business license in any state she gave me, major issue with grammer and spelling, ignoring the content of my previous messages what did not agree with what she wanted, etc)
Anyway it is catch and release so fair warning she is still out there on Cm hunting for suckers to scam! Good luck and stay sharp.



GreedyTop -> RE: I know a scammer on the site (12/5/2010 3:39:54 AM)

DAMN!! youre GOOD at this, CS!!



undergroundsea -> RE: I know a scammer on the site (12/17/2010 9:53:28 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze


Here is text from my post:

quote:

Also, in this thread itself there is talk of a seemingly genuine dominant woman who would ask for a monetary tribute saying it was her way to weed out flakes.


In the text above, I am giving the woman you describe benefit of doubt that she was genuine based on your description. Here is more text from my prior post:

quote:

Also, I expect that some of the negative response she got, even though the amount was small, was because the approach she used is shared by scammers--it was not so much the amount but the concept and principle.


I have not described the woman you describe as a scammer in my prior post. I have said that some of the response she received occurred likely because the approach--to ask for a monetary tribute--is shared by scammers. I doubt that people who objected were really concerned about parting with a dollar for its amount but about whatever sending the dollar represented, whether it was letting someone who they perceived to be a scammer win, whether it was the idea of a double standard, or whether it was something else.

To respond to your comments directed at me, in general I do not respond to profiles that ask for a monetary tribute. If you do not ask for money for a sub to prove he is sincere, then you are obviously using intelligent reasoning to make this determination. I am simply saying that others can do the same and that asking for tribute is not driven by necessity but by opportunity. Furthermore, I am comfortable with how much my involvement in BDSM speaks for me as one who is not going to disappear when the opportunity to meet presents itself, and what kind of person I present myself to be via my profile and letter.

I find the message behind asking a tribute to have a double standard. It is overtly saying that I am being judged as likely being guilty and must prove otherwise but must accept that the woman is sincere. Furthermore, it is saying that her time is valuable whereas mine is not, which is also a double standard. I am relying on information in profile and communication to gauge the person and am not asking the person to do something I am not doing.

If I came across the profile or demand from the woman you describe, I would likely pass on it on principle. And, frankly, I find the amount odd and the offer to return the dollar odd, which is more likely to leave me uncertain about what is happening.

quote:

If you don't get the difference between $1 to verify you are a real person who doesn't have multiple identities and writes to you on several accounts and somebody who tries to get money out of you, I'm not sure it's a good idea to be let out of the house without a keeper


Let us continue for sake of discussion. I welcome hearing your perspective about how subs might distinguish between someone asking for a $1 to verify one is a real person versus someone who tries to get money from them.

quote:

Seems that only guys are allowed to complain about time wasters, the women, oh they deserve it.


Please point me to the text that allows you to form this conclusion so that I may clarify. I am saying that guys should also be allowed to vent or complain.

quote:

I seriously have a problem with your double standard and frankly with you coming across like a hypocrite.


Please point me to the text that allows you to form this conclusion so that I may clarify. What specifically have I said that sets a different standard for myself than I ask for others?

I have tried to pick my words appropriately for this post. If my post does have elements of a reactionary tone, it is because I see unfriendly sarcasm and attacks directed at me. Would you help me understand the reason for why you directed those comments at me? If it is something I did and I can do it differently next time, I am open to that idea.

I might not always succeed but I try not to direct personal attacks at others. I find it hard to avoid them when I feel the same are directed at me. Would you entertain my request to not direct such comments at me so our communication can be free of them?

Cheers,

Sea






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