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Dom Topping Dommes - 4/28/2006 11:08:51 AM

grabyourankles

Posts: 1
Joined: 10/27/2005
Status: offline

Just wondering is it common or "normal" for a Dom wanting to Top a Domme? or vise versa. Does this make either lose credibility as to them being Dom/e? I don't post here often so not sure if this has been discussed. Just looking for information.

thank you

Post #: 1

RE: Dom Topping Dommes - 4/28/2006 11:14:03 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: grabyourankles
Just wondering is it common or "normal" for a Dom wanting to Top a Domme? or vise versa. Does this make either lose credibility as to them being Dom/e? I don't post here often so not sure if this has been discussed. Just looking for information.

thank you

It's normal for stupid doms to think all female doms want to be dominated.

Switching is fairly common, and yes being a switch often confuses and loses credibility from others unfortunately (and in some circles it's completely normal and does absolutely nothing for your credibility).

Are you asking is it normal for a dominant to want to dominate someone BECAUSE the other person is a dominant? I guess that would be like any fetish or kink, some like it and some don't.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to grabyourankles)

Post #: 2

RE: Dom Topping Dommes - 4/28/2006 11:23:16 AM

valeca

Posts: 403
Joined: 1/9/2006
Status: offline

I don't think it'd be abnormal, at least.

The idea of being able to bend a dominant person to your 'will' has to be a thrill to some. Not all dominants want someone who will just 'roll over' (so to speak)...they'd enjoy the challenge.

"A thing most satisfying is something you have to work for." -- Loraith

_____________________________

~valeca, Owned and Operated by Loraith.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 3

RE: Dom Topping Dommes - 4/28/2006 11:23:41 AM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

In my case it would be considered a kink......the idea that I can take a very dominant amazonian woman and bend her to my will is pretty hefty for me.
(Additional and sick considerations would also weigh heavily in this, but this ain't Jerry Springer and I ain't going to enumerate them.LOLOLOLOL)

I have owned strong women, but never ones that identified as Dommes all the way.

Dom Topping Dommes kinda squicks me
for me it would have to be Dom Dominating Dominatrix.

See how fucked up we all are?

Well, not impossible surely.......but a certain long-long shot. So I don't really push it much.

Sincerely,
Ron
p.s. If this is another form of one of those am I alone, or so sick that nobody but me thinks of this kinda questions................

You are so NOT alone.

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 4

RE: Dom Topping Dommes - 4/28/2006 11:27:36 AM

sgtfirmhand

Posts: 2
Joined: 5/16/2005
Status: offline

If a Dom or Domme is topped I would think that makes them a "Switch"

(in reply to grabyourankles)

Post #: 5

RE: Dom Topping Dommes - 4/28/2006 11:38:07 AM

MysticFireTopaz

Posts: 50939
Joined: 4/23/2005
From: Dallas/Ft. Worth, TX
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: grabyourankles

Just wondering is it common or "normal" for a Dom wanting to Top a Domme? or vise versa. Does this make either lose credibility as to them being Dom/e? I don't post here often so not sure if this has been discussed. Just looking for information.

thank you

Occasionally I get a responses from male dominants who think all Women are really submissive and want to bring out My "true nature." Instead, they bring out My desire to add them to My blocked users list.

More commonly, I get responses from male dominants who are seeking a Domme so that they can "explore their submissive side." Normally I will ignore such a reply on Collarme.com because I don't have time for it. It diverts time from what I am really looking for, a submissive or a slave.

There was one exception, a male dominant who befriended Me in person at a local organization. He wanted to be topped to find out what it was like so we played a few times. I don't think it made him lose credibility as a dom. It wasn't an ongoing thing, just something he wanted to experience to know what it felt like.

Lady Topaz

(in reply to grabyourankles)

Post #: 6

RE: Dom Topping Dommes - 4/28/2006 11:42:16 AM

Reasonable

Posts: 459
Joined: 4/20/2006
Status: offline

I have been asked to do this by Dommes who wanted a release from stress,etc.in the past,discreetly. Remember that many began as subs and switches. But they don't want to lose face with thier subs,so they do it in private.

I politely refused,since I get no particular ego charge out of having temporary play or submission. I know it's a big fantasy thing to other Tops-but I guess I'm just too crippled by pragmatism to see it as anything but a waste of time.

(in reply to grabyourankles)

Post #: 7

RE: Dom Topping Dommes - 4/28/2006 11:42:45 AM

CrappyDom

Posts: 1883
Joined: 4/11/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline

People are so quick to start slapping labels on people. If you enjoy switching and want to call yourself a switch feel free in my book. If you have topped 100 people and submitted once and call yourself a switch fine, if you don't fine.

This is all bs about who is more domly than the next. If you crawl around on all fours, get forced to suck off men even though you aren't gay, eat scat from anyone your mistress tells you to and one day walk into a dungeon, some woman looks up at you and falls to her feet striken by the most powerful submissive feelings she has ever known and the two of you live the rest of your life together with her as your slave, does that make you a switch.

Use your life to define yourself, not the plastic badge you put on.

(in reply to sgtfirmhand)

Post #: 8

RE: Dom Topping Dommes - 4/28/2006 11:43:11 AM

jadedshadow

Posts: 23
Joined: 2/14/2006
From: MS
Status: offline

Speaking from personal experience here as the Domme being Dommed..it would take a switch. I know several Dommes that you would definitely be in for a shock if you tried to Dom them. As for loss of credibility, my question would be why? Why would someone lose credibility for allowing themselves the opportunity to learn and grow within the lifestyle from both ends of the spectrum? To me, it simply shows that they are more capable, and would give them even more credibility.

(in reply to sgtfirmhand)

Post #: 9

RE: Dom Topping Dommes - 4/28/2006 11:45:44 AM

Reasonable

Posts: 459
Joined: 4/20/2006
Status: offline

The loss of face is a gut level thing.

Many have subs simply cannot emotionally relate to amnyone unless they are felt to be an unbending Female supremacist.

Don't expect reactions in this to be logical ones-the animal rules a vast proportion of it.

(in reply to jadedshadow)

Post #: 10

RE: Dom Topping Dommes - 4/28/2006 11:49:52 AM

amayos

Posts: 1553
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: New England
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: grabyourankles
Just wondering is it common or "normal" for a Dom wanting to Top a Domme? or vise versa. Does this make either lose credibility as to them being Dom/e? I don't post here often so not sure if this has been discussed. Just looking for information.

I think we all contain an ideal we would kneel before—either mortal or immortal. For me this ideal is no doubt unattainable, as it probably is for many male and female dominants.

As for the prospect of conquering a dominant female, nay. I have no desire to bring such a creature to heel, unless she comes of her own will. The machinations involved in seducing and reinforcing her submission would weigh heavily upon my time and energy. While it can be said no worthwhile deed cannot be accomplished without some measure of pain, it is wise to balance that loss of time and energy with what will be returned to you in its stead. My interest is in the female mind unfettered by self-servitude, arrogance and narcissism. A female dominant may just as well say the same of her ideal boy. Many of us ultimately want slaves or servants that lift us, not projects that weigh us down.

(in reply to grabyourankles)

Post #: 11

RE: Dom Topping Dommes - 4/28/2006 11:51:02 AM

LadyHugs

Posts: 2299
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Dear Grabyourankles, Ladies and Gentlemen;

I am inclined to think that those Dominant men who wish to dominate a Dominant woman, is more of an insecurity trait, to which they feel the need to make it a conquest. Dominant men/women who wish to dominate another can also be a "wishful thinking" as they are attracted to each other but, must remove the dominant trait in order to successfully make it come to it's conclusion.

Unfortunately, clothing often throws male dominants off, as so many clothing for dominant women is no different for female slaves. Men are sexually attracted and visually pulled. Unless the female dominant is an extremely powerful individual, independent of the clothing, rarely are they approached as to be dominated, as their body language transmits the authority and power.

Some men, still feel that no woman is ever allowed to be a dominant, that "history" is showing men are rulers over women. Although, plenty of ancient history manifests women in the power and position of power but, they deny that or make excuses. I have had such men and, they are easy to dismiss as being naive.

Because of so many individuals who can't be discreet on the dominant side, they dare not submit to another dominant because they cannot feel safe that their credibility as a dominant will remain. Switches have a better time of it, as they openly do so. However, it really has much to do about individuals themselves.

Sometimes I have dominant men approach me and say how much they would love for me to be submissive or slave to them. Depending on that dominant, I can either take it as an insult, compliment and or teasing.

If I were to submit, I would want to be physically able to do so, from all realms that I have to submit with. However, with what is out in the community/lifestyle now;
they wouldn't qualify as to be Master to me, as few remember what it was over 30 years ago or have reached to my skills, knowledge and behaviors beyond me, which would be the only thing that would tempt me to submit. But, if I did have temptation to submit, I still would not; as I was brought up in a system that was harsh and standards of service. Since I cannot return to those standards due to my physical shortcomings from injuries, I shall never seek to submit--If I can't do it 100% I won't do it at all. But, that is just me.

Respectfully submitted,
Lady Hugs

(in reply to grabyourankles)

Post #: 12

RE: Dom Topping Dommes - 4/28/2006 11:54:41 AM

Reasonable

Posts: 459
Joined: 4/20/2006
Status: offline

You make an excellent point on the insecurity issue.

Only cripples need crutches.

(in reply to LadyHugs)

Post #: 13

RE: Dom Topping Dommes - 4/28/2006 11:56:49 AM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

LOLOLOLOLOL

Widdy, the best laid plans of mice and men gae aft aglae.

LOLOL....................

Ron

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to Reasonable)

Post #: 14

RE: Dom Topping Dommes - 4/28/2006 12:04:59 PM

mistoferin

Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHugs

However, with what is out in the community/lifestyle now;
they wouldn't qualify as to be Master to me, as few remember what it was over 30 years ago or have reached to my skills, knowledge and behaviors beyond me, which would be the only thing that would tempt me to submit.

Wow. Does that mean that you can't respect people with less years experience than yourself or feel that you could not learn new things from them? You have a few years on me but I have been doing this now for 28 years and I think that if I felt that way I would just have to throw in the towel as in one respect, you are very correct, it is hard to find people whose experience levels match my own. Fortunately though, I view each new encounter as unchartered territory and am happy to be open-minded enough to know that sometimes....a young dog can teach an old dog a few new tricks

!

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to LadyHugs)

Post #: 15

RE: Dom Topping Dommes - 4/28/2006 12:31:20 PM

CanadianGuy

Posts: 219
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: amayos
As for the prospect of conquering a dominant female, nay. I have no desire to bring such a creature to heel, unless she comes of her own will. The machinations involved in seducing and reinforcing her submission would weigh heavily upon my time and energy. While it can be said no worthwhile deed cannot be accomplished without some measure of pain, it is wise to balance that loss of time and energy with what will be returned to you in its stead. My interest is in the female mind unfettered by self-servitude, arrogance and narcissism. A female dominant may just as well say the same of her ideal boy. Many of us ultimately want slaves or servants that lift us, not projects that weigh us down.

Great answer.

I did have a female switch come after me to "punish" me for something I'd said and done, and after a few communications back and forth, she apologized, called me "Sir", and asked if we could be friends. I'm not saying that's a turnon of mine or anything, but it was nice to see. Frankly, it takes a special kind of person to re-examine themselves and admit that they aren't so rigid that they can't submit in certain circumstances. I'm not willing/able to do so, for the most part. Maybe that makes me inflexible. Maybe it just makes me sure of who I am. I'm not sure.

EDIT: Spelling error.

< Message edited by CanadianGuy -- 4/28/2006 12:33:04 PM >

(in reply to amayos)

Post #: 16

RE: Dom Topping Dommes - 4/28/2006 1:01:14 PM

MHOO314

Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline

what really pisses Me off, is Doms who do one of three things:

1. You are a lost little girl who needs My hand to bring you around
2. Shhh I really am a sub in disguise and would submit to you
3. (this I got today)---come one down to XXX and we'll take turns
WTF?

has hell frozen over yet?

< Message edited by MHOO314 -- 4/28/2006 1:03:46 PM >

_____________________________

SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor

(in reply to grabyourankles)

Post #: 17

RE: Dom Topping Dommes - 4/28/2006 1:14:13 PM

Cloudz

Posts: 836
Joined: 9/13/2005
Status: offline

MH,
Now...relax, take a few deep breaths, and tell us how you really feel...LOL.

If it helps, I have always gotten similar responses...simply human nature it seems.

_____________________________

Enjoy the Journey,
~Cloudz

"Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain."

(in reply to MHOO314)

Post #: 18

RE: Dom Topping Dommes - 4/28/2006 1:17:17 PM

fastlane

Posts: 2159
Joined: 5/26/2005
Status: offline

Well, I don't do any of those things so put that Damn whip down MH!
Hmmph, glad I got that off of my chest

Lots of interesting replies to this thread, so I'll add my own Yogism, if anyone is familiar with Yogi Berra?
You are what you are, while you are and no one else's opinion matters.....unless you let it!

Top Heavy and smiling, Kevin

_____________________________

Just because it hurts, doesn't necessarily make it a bad thing.

(in reply to MHOO314)

Post #: 19

RE: Dom Topping Dommes - 4/28/2006 2:05:12 PM

MistressImp

Posts: 162
Joined: 3/6/2006
Status: offline

My experience with this is when a Dom comes at me he's pretty much thinking with his nether regions....As LadyHugs stated sometimes the line of dress is rather blured....and I love to dress provocativly....does it offend me..... newp I often take it as a compliment because the majority of the time they are drawn to my appearence...does it annoy me... only if they keep trying after I've informed them that I have no submissive tendencies...That's about my two cents....

_____________________________

Ms Imp

Life is what you make of it, personally I'm making mine an Amusement Park with all the cool rides.

(in reply to Cloudz)

Post #: 20

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