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AnimusRex -> RE: So you're a Tea Partier? (11/27/2010 12:49:44 PM)
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How fun! Allow me to write both sides now, M'kay?
Lefty: "So you're a Tea Partier?"
Conservative: "Yes, I identify with the principal of a smaller, less intrusive central government."
Lefty: "So you are opposed to the PATRIOT Act which allows the government to read your email and tap your phone without a court order?"
Conservative: "No. I fully support the unlimited power of the President during wartime, as outlined by the Bush Administration. But I identify with the principal of a smaller, less intrusive central government."
Lefty: "So you want to weaken the government so that big corporations will control our lives?"
Conservative: "No. I want to control my own life. Limiting the power that the government can exert over our lives inherently limits the power of specials interests to coop that power. But I won't bother to explain how lack of government regulation puts me on an equal footing with billionaires who control the marketplace. But I identify with the principal of a smaller, less intrusive central government."
Lefty: "The Tea Party is backed by the Koch brothers. You are a slave to corporate interests and you don't even know it."
Conservative: "David Koch has been a lifelong supporter of libertarian causes. That means he identifies with the principal of a smaller, less intrusive central government. Like me."
Lefty: "But deregulation serves Koch's corporate interests."
Conservative: "First, when you talk about deregulation, you fail to differentiate between common rules which support free exchange by prohibiting fraud, and convoluted exception-based regulations which creates perverse incentives, encourages fraud, and limits free exchange. "Common rules" are of course purely theoretical- no one has ever actually seen one in practice. For instance, the rule against blowing up mountaintops and letting the toxic waste flow downstream and poison the streambeds and water supplies of others, is one of those exception based regulations that we hate.
Secondly yes, Koch Industries utilizes the services provided by government, such as roads, ports, utility infrastructure, or protections such as police, fire, and education. But it is outrageous that they be asked to pay for it. After all they write articles demanding a smaller, less intrusive central government from the comfort of a Medicare-provided scooter. Like me."
Lefty: "So... you believe that Sarah Palin and Christine O'Donnell are geniuses then?"
Conservative: "No. I think that they are vacuous retards whose public statements often sound like giddy beauty pageant contestants replying to a question about world peace. But I enthusiastically voted for them, and I share many of their views on the principal of a smaller, less intrusive central government. A smaller less intrusive government that outlaws masturbation and bans books."
Lefty: "But you do oppose health-care reform and want big insurance corporations to control our health-care, don't you?"
Conservative: "No. Speaking broadly, I am against paying for routine medical care through a third party bureaucracy. It distorts the market by distancing the consumer from the price signals which regulate supply and demand, and control costs. I don't think you can fix this by putting the government in control of an even bigger third party bureaucracy.
I think you can fix this by having people pay for their own health care- for instance, who doesn't have $50,000 laying around in their trust fund to pay for medical care? Besides, anyone who can't afford to pay $5,000 per week for chemotherapy can simply leave the marketplace, and voila, problem solved! Simple really.
It's one of those principals of smaller, less intrusive central government that I mentioned."
Lefty: "Racist."
Conservative: "I am not a racist."
Lefty: "You're actions speak louder than words."
Conservative: "What actions? Just because we paint posters of Obama as an African witch doctor, and call him a foreigner, an alien who isn't like Americans, just because we make pictures of his logo as graffitti on Mt. Rushmore, and say he is a Kenyan-born Muslim radical, why, thats because we identify with the principal of a smaller, less intrusive central government. Like me."
Echo chambers are a fun place.
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