RE: Punishments for subby.

RE: Punishments for subby. (Full Version)

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BeautyDebased -> RE: Punishments for subby. (1/8/2011 4:06:21 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: mbes I would be leery of having a pregnant girl kneel. It may be just fine, but with all the ligaments loosening up, I'd hate to stretch something and have it cause lifelong issues. I never had trouble with my knees until after my first was born. I've found that a light swat on the ass when I know I've fucked up is more than sufficient. It's not the pain, because there isn't any, it's just the acknowledgement of the fuck-up. If I got punished every time I forgot something, though, we'd never get around to anything fun. Damn memory... lmao, If I was punished each time I forgot something I wouldn't be sitting anytime soon...if someone has a bad memory they can't help that and shouldn't be punished for it. Just like a guy with a small package shouldn't be.... lol

barelynangel -> RE: Punishments for subby. (1/8/2011 5:05:08 PM)
There is a difference between discipline and punishment to me. I didn't read past the 2nd page but did read where you stated she forgets or its not fun. It sounds like she needs a concept of discipline with regards to the expectations you have of her. So maybe it would be better to focus on teaching her discipline. For example, if she forgets a lot to do something at a specific time, then an hour before she is supposed to do said task, you can have her standing wherever the task is and make her stand there doing nothing else until its time for her to do the task, then she does it and the next time she forgets, up the anti of the time she has to be there before its due. If its a list of things, then have her write out the list the night before and have her get up before she has to in order to rewrite her list, and then have her rewrite the list every hour until her first task is supposed to be done. After she gets done with the task, have her rewrite the list again and then every hour until the next task, after that task is done have her write it again. Eventually, you can test her without having to do that to see if she can remember what it is you would like her to do and she if she can show you even with new tasks that she has figured out a way to remember to do them when she is supposed to. All in all, if her excuse is she forgets or its not fun, that's a discipline problem not a punishment one in my book. She seems to enjoy punishments so instead you as a Master need to set up the atmosphere and environment that will allow her the discipline she needs to accomplish what you want from her and reach and maintain your expectations and standards. angel

GoddessLiliane -> RE: Punishments for subby. (1/9/2011 2:24:18 PM)
Like in any relationship, if somebody really cares about you and your feelings, and they disappoint you, they will do a lot to make sure it doesn't happen again, or else they're just not that into you. It goes for any gender in any direction. With subs, they mess up, often. But they fix it in a reasonable duration of time, or I'm done. I don't waste time and I can't expect someone to change for Me if they really can't. It's not fair to Me or to them.

BalletBob -> RE: Punishments for subby. (1/10/2011 6:24:44 PM)
Have her stand in the corner. I got punished once like that, and I hated it. It cured me fast. GOOD BOY NOW, sub BalletBob

TNDommeK -> RE: Punishments for subby. (1/11/2011 1:30:29 PM)
I have a slave who punishments did nothing for her. the rice on the floor and kneeling is good...but there are better positions.....for instance, when My slave is being punished, I put her in very uncomfortable positions for a long time, at first she thinks its no big deal, after about 30 min, she stars to squirm....then comes the pain. writing lines works, but Id start with about 500 lines or so.... I have also used the chair method, make her sit on the wall like she has a chair under her...then as time progresses, add books to her lap. this work wonders for Mine. good luck to you

BalletBob -> RE: Punishments for subby. (1/12/2011 3:49:20 PM)
Hi TNDommeK. I didn't know anyone else knew about "THE INVISIBLE CHAIR". I like to do it, but not as punishment. I even wrote it in my second (Childrens) book. I think it is pretty neat, and gets people looking. Sitting Nowhere, sub BalletBob

TNDommeK -> RE: Punishments for subby. (1/13/2011 12:35:29 AM)
oh yea, I had to do it in school when I was bad, so I know how effective it can be, especially with My slave.

MasterSlaveLA -> RE: Punishments for subby. (1/15/2011 12:24:34 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MasterRaven12 I am trying to figure out a way to correct my sub when she is wrong. We have tried using a ruler to smack her breasts but it only turns her on or doesnt hurt at all. Cropping/flogging is out of the question as it is something she enjoys as is spanking. Any ideas or suggestions would be awesome. Pffft... rookies. Remove the toilet seat.... she'll be perfect after that!!! [:D]

ExSteelAgain -> RE: Punishments for subby. (1/15/2011 4:20:09 PM)
Tell her why she needs to be punished. Then have her stand nude and touch her with the crop, flogger, cane, etc....and tell her she won't feel them being used for long as you wish.

AnnaOfAramis -> RE: Punishments for subby. (1/15/2011 6:29:03 PM)
FR to no one in particular (because the OP seems to have disappeared): I used to work professionally in behavior modification. We never used punishment because it wasn't as effective as other methods and could come with a host of undesired side effects. Instead of focusing on the behavior you don't want, focus on what you do want and reinforce behaviors that are going in that direction. Google on terms like "positive training," "shaping," "behavior modification," "applied behavior analysis" etc. to find articles about this. Regards, anna

TNDommeK -> RE: Punishments for subby. (1/16/2011 1:40:36 AM)
speaking of punishment, I have to punish Mine tomorrow, for a bold face lie. I think Im more insulted over the lie, she thought Id believe than the act itself. thoughts anyone?

allthatjaz -> RE: Punishments for subby. (1/16/2011 7:04:02 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: crazyml To take this a step further, and I hesitate to do this since you're a "Master" and I don't make the same claim, you might want to consider the fact that the "failure" is not hers, but yours. As a true "Master" surely you must regard any failure in her part to meet your standards as a failure in your "Mastery"? So, perhaps Domiguy is absolutely right, perhaps when she "fails" you should punish yourself, in her presence? I think you have made a really good point here. If a submissive makes the same mistakes repeatedly there are two reasons why. She/he is either after some role-play funishment or the dominant isn't getting the message over. Funishment can be fun but its plain and simple role play. I consider any BDSM act given as a punishment is role-play because if someone is genuinely pissed off with their partner/subs actions they are going to stand them face to face and give them a dressing down. In my opinion dressing downs work. I'm not talking about shouting or throwing a wobbly which inevitably doesn't work but firmly questioning their actions and letting them know in no uncertain terms that it won't be tolerated very often does. Not sure about punishing yourself! I used to have a fem sub as well as a male sub who was known as my whipping boy. If she did something wrong then he got punished and that worked wonderfully because she didn't reap any masochistic rewards for bad behavior and she absolutely hated the attention I gave him for her actions.

kalikshama -> RE: Punishments for subby. (1/16/2011 7:17:02 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: TNDommeK speaking of punishment, I have to punish Mine tomorrow, for a bold face lie. I think Im more insulted over the lie, she thought Id believe than the act itself. thoughts anyone? Your disapproval > silent treatment, corner time.

kalikshama -> RE: Punishments for subby. (1/16/2011 7:19:57 AM)
Anna, I found this very interesting. My workplace has recently become more punitive and I am seeing undesired side effects. Would you be so kind as to elaborate as to this aspect? Thanks, KK quote: ORIGINAL: AnnaOfAramis FR to no one in particular (because the OP seems to have disappeared): I used to work professionally in behavior modification. We never used punishment because it wasn't as effective as other methods and could come with a host of undesired side effects. Instead of focusing on the behavior you don't want, focus on what you do want and reinforce behaviors that are going in that direction. Google on terms like "positive training," "shaping," "behavior modification," "applied behavior analysis" etc. to find articles about this. Regards, anna

osf -> RE: Punishments for subby. (1/16/2011 8:07:57 AM)
i don't see punishment as an act but rather an action to correct undesirable behavior i'm not a fan of punishment as to me it shows a breakdown in discipline and to my way of thinking both have a share in it i don't need to punish to hit punishment as play takes the relationship out of a reality based state my fantasies are all based on reality as a basis and not play i'm the worlds worst top

TNDommeK -> RE: Punishments for subby. (1/16/2011 2:06:33 PM)
that has been done already, and I read above about two reasons why the sub keeps repeating the offense. I dont think she likes the punsihment, I believe it could be the closeness afterwards, I think this time I will wait a while before that happens. thoughts?

AnnaOfAramis -> RE: Punishments for subby. (1/16/2011 4:21:03 PM)
Hi KK, Well for one thing, punishment is attention. Sometimes it reinforces the behavior because the person wants attention even negative attention. For another, in order to be effective punishment must occur almost simultaneously with the behavior it is intended to punish (example you burn yourself when you touch the stove... the behavior of being careless while reaching into the stove is immediately punished, and you are less likely to repeat the behavior) but, naturally, that is almost impossible to do. You aren't likely to find out the behavior occurred until after the fact, so by the time the punishment happens you are punishing whatever is occurring at that time, not what occurred before. (using the prior example, imagine if you touched the hot stove but didn't feel the pain until an hour later when you sat on the couch. You would associate the pain with the couch not the stove). So you can end up decreasing behaviors you actually want and doing nothing about the behavior you intended to punish if the timing is wrong. In order to work, the punishment would have to happen every time, on time. Any time the person got away with it, they would be reinforced for getting away with it, making the punished behavior resistant to change and making the person more likely to continue the behavior and just be careful not to get caught. This increases the likelihood of deception. Also, the person learns to fear the punishment or the person punishing rather than taking responsibility for the wrongdoing themselves. It also can lead to resentment and fear and for a while a subject may avoid doing anything for fear of doing something wrong. This can lead to decreased responses in a training situation. Just a few off the top of my head... I'm sure you can find more online if you google. Well wishes, anna

kalikshama -> RE: Punishments for subby. (1/16/2011 4:27:37 PM)
quote: It also can lead to resentment and fear and for a while a subject may avoid doing anything for fear of doing something wrong. This is exactly what has happened at work, thanks.

agirl -> RE: Punishments for subby. (1/16/2011 7:41:00 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: TNDommeK speaking of punishment, I have to punish Mine tomorrow, for a bold face lie. I think Im more insulted over the lie, she thought Id believe than the act itself. thoughts anyone? Punish if you feel the desire to, but ensure you find out why she lied also.(if you don't already know) Just as with a child, you don't want to end up with a situation where all you've managed to do is ensure she learns to be more careful with her lies. Best scenario is making it easy to tell the truth but then, that comes back to why she lied to begin with. agirl

TNDommeK -> RE: Punishments for subby. (1/16/2011 7:58:46 PM)
her lies are for no reason, like I could understand if she lied to keep Me from being mad, but literally it was a "no reason"lie. I have tried different types of punishment techniques but still she is to be punished later today.

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