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RE: Being a 21 year old master and wanting older woman. - 2/22/2011 2:16:10 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
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quote:

ORIGINAL: anthony69

I do find it interesting the various amounts of advice I have been given for personal growth, I'm assuming. It's not that I am immature or lack life skills because thats not the case, it's Me wanting to know a more different approach to finding woman more older than I.


Older women aren't necessarily any different to younger. Personally, I would not worry about their age in the sense that you treat them differently because if it. The age is your 'kink', your 'preference' but it doesn't help to feel approached only because one is older... most women like to know you are approching them as a person and as a potential, rather than just a number. Women are women, regardless of age... you approach them with 'romance' or ' bluster' or 'gentlemanly' or as a 'rogue' depending on your personality and on the type of person you are and are attracted to... not differently depending on their age. Older women aren't 'old', they are just 'older'.

The places you go to may alter though. You may find that meeting older women is easier in some places more than others.

_____________________________
RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to anthony69)
Profile   Post #: 101
RE: Being a 21 year old master and wanting older woman. - 2/22/2011 2:58:39 AM   
watersign69


Posts: 16
Joined: 2/21/2011
Status: offline 		Dam this has giving birth to a wide range of conversations. Is there such a thing as to much good advice? I'm starting to feel overwhelmed with constructive criticism!

(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 102
RE: Being a 21 year old master and wanting older woman. - 2/22/2011 3:38:02 AM   
tazzygirl


Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
Status: offline
quote:

The places you go to may alter though. You may find that meeting older women is easier in some places more than others.


Yeah, we old chicks have an earlier bedtime, dont like to dance or go to clubs, hate drinking and could care less about sports.

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 103
RE: Being a 21 year old master and wanting older woman. - 2/22/2011 4:26:49 AM   
Sundowner


Posts: 2549
Joined: 3/11/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: anthony69
... how do I go about establishing my self as a young master thats interested in older woman?


FR

I employ people. I employ young people and older people. I employ more younger than older, but I value both. I have senior staff who are younger and I have senior staff who are older. Similarly some junior staff are older, some are younger.


My point is that I am personally quite convinced that in the everyday world people have different strengths and weaknesses, mostly unrelated to age (and very often unrelated to experience). I suspect this is equally true in the specialised world of bdsm.


Personally I like younger people rather more than older people of my own agegroup - as employees, as friends, and particularly in bed (or bound and kneeling). I have found that it is very difficult, but possible, for an older person to build a close relationship with a young person; difficult simply because most people prefer to relate to their own agegroup. The way to do it AMAZING SECRET REVEALED HERE -----> is to meet and talk to as many people of the sort one likes (whether that's younger people, same agegroup people, older people, blacker people, submissive people, people with fewer limbs or more tattoos - whatever) and to seek to get to know them.

So for young people seeking an older person as a partner my advice, and thus my advice to the OP, would be simply to go meet and talk to the sort of people one admires; with some of them you are likely to build a relationship.


(Of course in the specialised case of young submissives seeking an older master my advice would be send me a PM).







(in reply to anthony69)
Profile   Post #: 104
RE: Being a 21 year old master and wanting older woman. - 2/22/2011 5:01:24 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
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quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

quote:

The places you go to may alter though. You may find that meeting older women is easier in some places more than others.


Yeah, we old chicks have an earlier bedtime, dont like to dance or go to clubs, hate drinking and could care less about sports.


Oh pffft Tazzy... you know I didn't mean that. But he's not going to find what he wants at an under 30's Disco evening is he?

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RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to tazzygirl)
Profile   Post #: 105
RE: Being a 21 year old master and wanting older woman. - 2/22/2011 5:11:49 AM   
reekon


Posts: 39
Joined: 2/16/2011
Status: offline 		I don't think age is a factor, if your Dom your Dom. aproach a 30-40 year old the same way you would aproach a 20 year old. if you have to change who you are to get the woman the sham may last for awhile but eventualy the cards will fall and your hand will be exsposed. be you, if your a true Dom trust me they will see that

(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 106
RE: Being a 21 year old master and wanting older woman. - 2/22/2011 6:35:52 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Innisint
IMO, years of experience is over valued. What matters is within a relationship or scene both parties are being fulfilled. Of course with time experience in, say, Shibari will be improved; but if a simple knot is enough to maintain a bondage scene and both people are happy who can judge that the novice isn't really a master at bondage....

We'll have to disagree here.  There is a difference between excelling at something rather than just being 'good enough to get by'.

quote:

This is true in nearly all things. When I was a child I loved children cartoons. Now I find plot holes, lack of character development...a masterful cartoon for children can be unwatchable to me now. The child doesn't care how I judge though...they just laugh and enjoy.

Exactly!  You care more about the entertainment value because you have acquired a higher standard.  You don't seek to watch those same cartoons when there is no child (the person who is new to being entertained) present.  You go for the higher standard that actually entertains you.

quote:

Finally, for those with years of experience in BDSM and think they have mastered some particular skill I'd evaluate myself if I were you. Odds are there is some room for improvement even now. First, focus on improving yourself then judge others. We are all of us works in progress in life and BDSM.

Who says that we don't?  It's not a case of we've learned our share and now we're done.  I'll always be in pursuit of being better,  It's not like I earned My leather or started presenting on topping techniques and said 'hey, I'm done now'. 

The irony about this subject is that ten years from now, when you've spent a decade investing yourself on skill and knowledge, you might just feel differently about it than you do today.  Just like those cartoons, you're skill level that was once 'just good enough to get by' will pale in comparison to what you'll be able to do ten years from now.  You might just look back and see the difference and improvement and find that worthwhile.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Innisint)
Profile   Post #: 107
RE: Being a 21 year old master and wanting older woman. - 2/22/2011 7:05:07 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline
quote:

We'll have to disagree here. There is a difference between excelling at something rather than just being 'good enough to get by'.


But you don't have to excel in something to be happy... some people reach a certain level and it rocks for them.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

The irony about this subject is that ten years from now, when you've spent a decade investing yourself on skill and knowledge, you might just feel differently about it than you do today.  Just like those cartoons, you're skill level that was once 'just good enough to get by' will pale in comparison to what you'll be able to do ten years from now.  You might just look back and see the difference and improvement and find that worthwhile.



I always find the biggest issue though Lady Pact is that people automatically assume that age = experience, not that people don't wish to look back ten years from now and find they now have more experience. And sometimes people just hit a peak and never improve because it's beyond their ability, even if they take another ten years to learn. You don't have to be the best at whatever you do to excel, you just have to be happy... which is why there is so much stress and unhappiness around IMO.


_____________________________
RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 108
RE: Being a 21 year old master and wanting older woman. - 2/22/2011 7:34:08 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
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quote:

ORIGINAL: RCdc
But you don't have to excel in something to be happy... some people reach a certain level and it rocks for them.

No argument.  As with most anything else, people will view the subject differently.

quote:

I always find the biggest issue though Lady Pact is that people automatically assume that age = experience, not that people don't wish to look back ten years from now and find they now have more experience. And sometimes people just hit a peak and never improve because it's beyond their ability, even if they take another ten years to learn. You don't have to be the best at whatever you do to excel, you just have to be happy... which is why there is so much stress and unhappiness around IMO.

In fairness, I didn't say that age = experience.  Time, continued learning, and application certainly do. 

There's a difference between being the best and being your personal best.  I highly doubt that I'll ever be the best at any of this.  That doesn't mean that I can't strive to be the best that I can personally be.  I haven't hit My peak yet. 

As always, My regards to your Master.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 109
RE: Being a 21 year old master and wanting older woman. - 2/22/2011 8:27:24 AM   
0ldhen


Posts: 2221
Joined: 12/27/2010
From: Henhouse in Trolltopia, Harleyville USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

quote:

The places you go to may alter though. You may find that meeting older women is easier in some places more than others.


Yeah, we old chicks have an earlier bedtime, dont like to dance or go to clubs, hate drinking and could care less about sports.


Let's not forget our naptime, doctors appointments, and how long it takes us to get anywhere because we drive so slow.

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Everyone crashes. Some get back on. Some don't.

Za'beeta Regal, Et Vogo O' Lurwadra'd Wyka Go Abosh Inunsey.

(in reply to tazzygirl)
Profile   Post #: 110
RE: Being a 21 year old master and wanting older woman. - 2/22/2011 9:01:12 AM   
leadership527


Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: porcelaine
The gender bias on this subject is rather intriguing. The OP is too young to be considered master worthy but a woman in his position is rarely questioned regarding her desire for submission or slavery. Although their life experiences may vary, she's at the same age point as her male counterpart. But we rarely bat an eye in protest.
Really? Why would it be intriguing? It seems to me to accord perfectly with the basics of male/female selection patterns from a vanilla standpoint and also align well with normally expected patterns of authority. I wouldn't bat an eye in protest because it makes total sense.

And for the record, not all of us guys would select a 20-something slave. That was out of the question for me even when I was in my 20's.

~Jeff


_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to porcelaine)
Profile   Post #: 111
RE: Being a 21 year old master and wanting older woman. - 2/22/2011 9:03:25 AM   
leadership527


Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: watersign69
Dam this has giving birth to a wide range of conversations. Is there such a thing as to much good advice? I'm starting to feel overwhelmed with constructive criticism!

*laughs* been there, done that, got the t-shirt. Best medicine for that is walk away from the thread for a few days :)


_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to watersign69)
Profile   Post #: 112
RE: Being a 21 year old master and wanting older woman. - 2/22/2011 9:18:21 AM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline 		Hi Anthony.

I didn't see your first profile, but from what I assumed from the comments, it seems like watersign69 is an improvement. However, you should clean this up:

quote:

I'm a 21 year old dominant male undergoing training in mastering the art and life style of Being a Dam.


It wasn't anthony we objected to, but the 69, not sure why you kept it. I think it makes you look like a HNG.

quote:

Second consideration, drop the 69 at the end of your nic. It looks like an XBL gamertag.


So, you're an Expert on Whips? Can you do what LadyPact, Hausboy, and others say? http://www.collarchat.com/m_3574391/tm.htm. This is precisely why I am skeptical of 21 year olds.

But good for you for having an open mind on this thread!

(in reply to watersign69)
Profile   Post #: 113
RE: Being a 21 year old master and wanting older woman. - 2/22/2011 9:40:01 AM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: watersign69

Dam this has giving birth to a wide range of conversations. Is there such a thing as to much good advice? I'm starting to feel overwhelmed with constructive criticism!

Just wait until the deconstructive criticism hits ya.
Welcome to the boards.


_____________________________

Owner of asterion

Metawhore.... the sound of a metaphore when gagged
Free woman
Resident thread finisher
To my stalker:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LN2lP_7J7GI&feature=fvwrel

(in reply to watersign69)
Profile   Post #: 114
RE: Being a 21 year old master and wanting older woman. - 2/22/2011 9:55:56 AM   
BonesFromAsh


Posts: 1362
Joined: 6/17/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kalikshama

It wasn't anthony we objected to, but the 69, not sure why you kept it. I think it makes you look like a HNG.



Just a thought...his new name, watersign69, leads me to believe his astrological sign is cancer. 


(in reply to kalikshama)
Profile   Post #: 115
RE: Being a 21 year old master and wanting older woman. - 2/22/2011 10:05:23 AM   
watersign69


Posts: 16
Joined: 2/21/2011
Status: offline 		The 69 is at the end of my name because I am a water sign cancer. I do not play video games, never have never will, not my cup of tea. Any who I if it helps any I feel i can relate better with people in general older than I. Personally I feel I'm a older sould in a younger mans body is all!

(in reply to BonesFromAsh)
Profile   Post #: 116
RE: Being a 21 year old master and wanting older woman. - 2/22/2011 10:11:08 AM   
watersign69


Posts: 16
Joined: 2/21/2011
Status: offline 		The age is not what is important to me it's,
the fact that an older woman has lived longer and knows what she wants! The turn on for me is more so the personality and individual than age, its just a number after all.

(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 117
RE: Being a 21 year old master and wanting older woman. - 2/22/2011 10:16:40 AM   
BonesFromAsh


Posts: 1362
Joined: 6/17/2010
Status: offline 		Anthony,

The profile looks much better...more realistic and believable. 

I would like to suggest a couple things, though.  First, I would copy the entire profile and paste it to a word document to do a spell and grammar check.  Second...as an 'expert' in poetry, maybe you could offer an example in your journal. 

Good luck.

(in reply to watersign69)
Profile   Post #: 118
RE: Being a 21 year old master and wanting older woman. - 2/22/2011 10:42:43 AM   
NocturnalStalker


Posts: 3858
Joined: 12/4/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: watersign69

The 69 is at the end of my name because I am a water sign cancer. I do not play video games, never have never will, not my cup of tea. Any who I if it helps any I feel i can relate better with people in general older than I. Personally I feel I'm a older sould in a younger mans body is all!


I am just going to comment that a lot of people are going to automatically assume that "69" means something entirely different and hold it to greater assumption considering what this website is about.  I can respect that you want older partners and feel that your mind belies your age however at the moment the "69" could be the difference between a response and an unread, deleted. 

For me if I get a message from a woman with the following in her name: "whore, bitch, slut" I automatically disregard what they may have to say.  I read them but it doesn't provoke much thought in me to reply back.

Since I have gone for more than two sentences without any sarcastic remarks I will say that a woman probably doesn't want to feel that she is being used for a "sexual conquest."  If I was to place myself in their position, seeing a mail from a 21-year-old male with a "69" in their name promotes that thought of interest being extended only to the bedroom as opposed to genuine like. 

TL;DR - You're fighting an uphill battle by wanting an older female at such a young age as is...might as well take more precautions.


_____________________________

"The road I walk is paved in gold to glorify my platinum soul."

(in reply to watersign69)
Profile   Post #: 119
RE: Being a 21 year old master and wanting older woman. - 2/22/2011 10:48:58 AM   
tazzygirl


Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: 0ldhen


quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

quote:

The places you go to may alter though. You may find that meeting older women is easier in some places more than others.


Yeah, we old chicks have an earlier bedtime, dont like to dance or go to clubs, hate drinking and could care less about sports.


Let's not forget our naptime, doctors appointments, and how long it takes us to get anywhere because we drive so slow.


Eh? Can you speak up dearie???

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to 0ldhen)
Profile   Post #: 120
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