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MadamMistique -> safe words (3/30/2011 7:22:05 AM)

safe words...do you use? what do you think of use of safe words?
would like views of Dommes and subs ?



OsideGirl -> RE: safe words (3/30/2011 7:26:24 AM)

I firmly believe in safewords, especially if you don't know each other well. We still use yellow and red after 11 years together. I haven't called a safeword in years, but it's there just in case something weird pops up.



LaTigresse -> RE: safe words (3/30/2011 7:27:33 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadamMistique

safe words...do you use? what do you think of use of safe words?
would like views of Dommes and subs ?



Within the type of relationship that I require......how I build that relationship.......safe words are meaningless.



DesFIP -> RE: safe words (3/30/2011 7:30:10 AM)

If I have a cramp, I'll just tell him that. If however, he hits an emotional trigger it isn't uncommon for me to be unable to speak.
I'm gagged a lot, so it's important for me to have a gesture so he knows there's a problem that requires removing the gag for me to tell him about.

Oddly enough, and I don't know why this is so, it's easier to use a gesture to indicate distress than it is to tell him.



porcelaine -> RE: safe words (3/30/2011 7:46:45 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadamMistique

safe words...do you use? what do you think of use of safe words?
would like views of Dommes and subs ?


Greetings,

Safe words are not a part of my relationships. Why do i need to be "safe" with my partner? If there's a problem i let him know and we go from there. i suppose there is some usefulness for those that play casually. But i couldn't fathom it outside of those circumstances.

Namaste,

~porcelaine



Ishtarr -> RE: safe words (3/30/2011 7:56:50 AM)

I don't generally use safewords, even when playing with strangers.

I have no problem articulating an issue when it comes up and don't need to have a code word to express that something is wrong.
I've yet to encounter (to my deep sorrow) a gag that manages to shut me up so I technically don't really need a gesture for that either, though I still use one especially when I'm playing with strangers.



LadyPact -> RE: safe words (3/30/2011 8:16:37 AM)

I use safe words.  Both for casual play and when I'm playing with clip.  Still use yellow for slow and red for stop.  They work just as well now as they did in the beginning.

While it's true that a lot of people say that they can articulate a problem, a lot can't.  Plus, in one word, "red" gets My attention pretty fast. 

If I'm remembering correctly, the last time clip had to call his safe word was last August.  It had to do with the heat.



Kana -> RE: safe words (3/30/2011 8:23:12 AM)

I believe in safe words. Words like Hi, hello, kind etc...

And I don't like mean words, like Fuck off, they tend to get one embroiled in fisticuffs.



porcelaine -> RE: safe words (3/30/2011 9:04:17 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana

And I don't like mean words, like Fuck off, they tend to get one embroiled in fisticuffs.


*modest swoonage* i love that word... fisticuffs. :)

i'd echo a safe word or two to you. But given the height disparity that might be hazardous to my health. [:D]

Namaste,

~porcelaine



mnottertail -> RE: safe words (3/30/2011 9:08:37 AM)

Oh, is it fisticuffs you're after so early in the morning Mrs. Thomas O'Herlihy?



Kana -> RE: safe words (3/30/2011 9:11:03 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: porcelaine

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana

And I don't like mean words, like Fuck off, they tend to get one embroiled in fisticuffs.


*modest swoonage* i love that word... fisticuffs. :)

i'd echo a safe word or two to you. But given the height disparity that might be hazardous to my health. [:D]

Namaste,

~porcelaine



No skullduggery please



ResidentSadist -> RE: safe words (3/30/2011 9:15:13 AM)

“It’s a whip my dear. It’s supposed to hurt.”

Safe words have never been of much use to me really . . .  it negates the fear factor if they have ultimate control.

I am very empathetic and read body language very well.  I use common sense and situational awareness.  After all, when you have a masochist sexually and emotionally aroused on a mix of fear, pain and passion to a peak that is far beyond the point where the pleasure/pain threshold blurred together so your every torturous touch only causes another quivering orgasmic rush . . . they are so high on endorphins you could cut one their limbs off and they wouldn’t feel it.  What good is a safe word in that state of mind?  I have to be the one to watch what is happening so there is no permanent damage.

And if there was a safe word, what would it be used for?  Why would someone want to stop me from hurting them and scaring them so badly that they are left quaking in a puddle of their own piss, blood and cum?



CreepyStalker -> RE: safe words (3/30/2011 9:21:33 AM)

I don't see the point in safewords; 90% of the time they get ignored anyway.



porcelaine -> RE: safe words (3/30/2011 9:23:58 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

Oh, is it fisticuffs you're after so early in the morning Mrs. Thomas O'Herlihy?


That was profoundly wrong! i'm not that kinky! [:D]

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana

No skullduggery please


And ruin my chastity? Not a chance. :)

Namaste,

~porcelaine




IrishMist -> RE: safe words (3/30/2011 10:54:53 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: MadamMistique

safe words...do you use? what do you think of use of safe words?
would like views of Dommes and subs ?


I, myself, do not use them; however, I DO encourage others to make use of the 'safe feelings' that they bring.



SailingBum -> RE: safe words (3/30/2011 11:06:55 AM)

The safe word I use most often is "This is gonna hurt you a lot more than me"

BadOne



leadership527 -> RE: safe words (3/30/2011 11:27:53 AM)

I think safe words are a useful tool if one engages in "scenes" where "no" might mean "yes". In such a situation, if you want to allow "no" at all, then you're going to need some other words to mean "no". Since Carol and I don't play in this way a safe word would be superfluous.



DarkSteven -> RE: safe words (3/30/2011 11:28:01 AM)

I like the security they bring, that I'm not going to hurt a sub more than she can take. Or if I do and she didn't safeword, not my problem.



myotherself -> RE: safe words (3/30/2011 11:43:02 AM)

~fr~

I use 'red' as a safeword, but to be honest I've never had to use it for a long, long time.

When I did casual play in clubs with a very dear Dom friend of mine, he knew what I could take and we never got to the point of safewording.

With Master, although it's a relatively new relationship, we play really hard but he's always stopped just short of me needing to safeword.

Observant, intelligent sadists are a REAL pain in the ass! And the boobs. And the feet. And...and...[:D]




sexyred1 -> RE: safe words (3/30/2011 11:51:53 AM)

I think safewords are useful; especially when you are a very vocal sub and tend to scream, moan or say no, oh no, oh my god, blah blah blah.

This way, the other person knows when you use your safeword, they may have gone a bit too far and now the no, really does mean no and is not being uttered in simple abandon.



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