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For the married and 24-7,a gut answer question... - 5/8/2006 4:22:31 PM

badpaliden

Posts: 96
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline

I asked this in another forum , but would like to ask it here as well. When your answer this ,WHAT is your first thought that pops throught your brain? What are you to your partner? Did you answer Hubbi/Wife Bf/Gf or was it Dom/Slave/Sub? I just thought to put this out for perusal. I know that for me it varies at time and situations.. but underneath it all lies one answer.

Post #: 1

RE: For the married and 24-7,a gut answer question... - 5/8/2006 4:41:19 PM

losttreasure

Posts: 875
Joined: 12/17/2005
Status: offline

Wife.

I don't feel that marriage in anyway compromises the D/s relationship, but in some respects... it does supercede it. In other words, while 24/7 implies submission on my part at all times, that doesn't change the fact that I would be the partner of my spouse. The reverse isn't necessarily true if I'm not married to my Dom.

*shrugs* It's semantics... I know.

(in reply to badpaliden)

Post #: 2

RE: For the married and 24-7,a gut answer question... - 5/8/2006 4:45:59 PM

BitaTruble

Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline

property

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."

(in reply to losttreasure)

Post #: 3

RE: For the married and 24-7,a gut answer question... - 5/8/2006 4:51:07 PM

slavejali

Posts: 2918
Status: offline

First thing that pops into my mind is I'm Masters partner.

What being a partner means to me is, I'm submissive to him, I am his slave, I am his wife, I am his friend, I am his lover, I am the closest person to him. The word partner has all those associations and realities for me.

I have a stronger association to the word Master than I do to his birth name.

If a vanilla person asked me what being a wife meant, I would answer that I see my role as wife as one that is submissive to her husband, which would be telling them I am his slave without saying the actual word.

I see no conflict at all between different words, most times its just like speaking the language of the person you're talking to, yet what you are saying all amounts to the same thing.

Slave and Wife means the same thing to me in action. The only difference to me is, which particular word is used as a communication tool to outside parties, neither word change the dynamics of our relationship or my association to it.

_____________________________

Freedom in Bondage

Different Strokes for Different Folks

"I'll always have a *soft spot* for Sadists"

(in reply to badpaliden)

Post #: 4

RE: For the married and 24-7,a gut answer question... - 5/8/2006 5:29:21 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

To my owners I was their slave/property. They never gave me pet names and often just called me by my name. To one of my owners I was her slave and her neice.

Right now, I use the label boyfriend/partner for all of my long-term committed relationships. I am not owned by any of them nor do I own any of them. They use girlfriend for me, among a few pet names.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to badpaliden)

Post #: 5

RE: For the married and 24-7,a gut answer question... - 5/8/2006 5:34:01 PM

RapturesDaddy

Posts: 25
Joined: 4/29/2006
Status: offline

I consider mine, my partnr, she is no less than me because she chooses to submit. We love each other first and foremost.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 6

RE: For the married and 24-7,a gut answer question... - 5/8/2006 5:37:15 PM

valeca

Posts: 403
Joined: 1/9/2006
Status: offline

Depending on the situation, all of the above, for me.

In this exact moment, I'd say I'd lean more toward what jali said, but in 30 mins, I might lean more toward what celeste said. It's all relative.

_____________________________

~valeca, Owned and Operated by Loraith.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 7

RE: For the married and 24-7,a gut answer question... - 5/8/2006 5:40:16 PM

bandit25

Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline

sub...cuz that's what I am

(in reply to valeca)

Post #: 8

RE: For the married and 24-7,a gut answer question... - 5/8/2006 5:45:29 PM

juliaoceania

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

Because I have family and friends that I do not wish to know about this choice I have made I would refer to my dom as my boyfriend or significant other except when socializing with others that know. I would also refer to him as my dom when we are in private. If I were married I would refer to him as my husband for the same reason, it takes a lot less explaining to folks then introducing my mate as "This is my dom". I know there are others that are "out of the closet", and while I respect people and the choices they make, not all of us are as free to make them the same choices.

Many of us have kids (I have a teenage son), or careers that preclude us from referring to our sub/dom as that in the eyes of the world. It is a very good question and I had thought of it myself in wondering how people refer to each other when they consider themselves lifestylers. I do not necessarily think that it is important to label your dynamic anyways. I have seen a lot of confusion on this board about labels and those who seek to identify themselves as "real" and they label others as "fake". I really like the anacronym WIIWD because of that. It is just what we do, and labeling leads to posturing about the realness and the fakeness of others. Just because someone values their sub or dom as a spouse does not mean they are not involved in power exchange. At least that is my opinion, and there are as many opinions as there are people I suppose.

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 9

RE: For the married and 24-7,a gut answer question... - 5/8/2006 6:20:40 PM

mixielicous

Posts: 1283
Joined: 4/6/2006
From: Boston area, Massachusetts
Status: offline

i am everything. when He talks of the future though, it has literally been put in this order: wifey/slave/mommy/pet

right now its slave-gf/finace, not two or three seperate roles but one.

my point is that, in our relationship they are all part of each other. so i he doesnt call me by just one.

(in reply to juliaoceania)

Post #: 10

RE: For the married and 24-7,a gut answer question... - 5/8/2006 7:14:06 PM

KnightofMists

Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

slave for both of my girls

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to badpaliden)

Post #: 11

RE: For the married and 24-7,a gut answer question... - 5/8/2006 7:28:21 PM

proudsub

Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline

Wife popped in first, hard to break old habits.

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan

(in reply to badpaliden)

Post #: 12

RE: For the married and 24-7,a gut answer question... - 5/8/2006 9:21:08 PM

PeaceInterrupted

Posts: 16
Joined: 5/7/2006
Status: offline

My hubby has always been submissive with me, but he is my hubby first and foremost and he only submits to me, but, he enjoys cotopping with me when I play with a female subbie. We have been married for 20 years, and I have to say finding myself as a Domme saved our marriage.

Peace

(in reply to badpaliden)

Post #: 13

RE: For the married and 24-7,a gut answer question... - 5/8/2006 10:32:45 PM

perverseangelic

Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline

Partner/property-"his girl" Partner in situations where property or "his girl" would cause more trouble than it's worth.

_____________________________

~in the begining it is always dark~

(in reply to PeaceInterrupted)

Post #: 14

RE: For the married and 24-7,a gut answer question... - 5/9/2006 2:50:21 AM

OnyxGoddess

Posts: 242
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline

Cruel Wife as he is my cuck. but in front of family we're totally vanilla. he can say whatever he wants but he knows i'm not going to take it lightly and that he'll have to pay for it later.

(in reply to perverseangelic)

Post #: 15

RE: For the married and 24-7,a gut answer question... - 5/9/2006 3:29:43 AM

twicehappy

Posts: 2706
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline

ScooterTrash is my Master

ShiftedJewel is my Mistress

When i asked them this questions Master responded Jewel is my wife, twice is my slave.

Mistress responded Scooter is my husband, twice is my slave.

If you ask what we are as a group you hear we are a family.

When we are in public, even around family or co workers when asked who i am they both invariably respond she is our girl.

< Message edited by twicehappy -- 5/9/2006 3:31:16 AM >

_____________________________

Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations.

The human heart is not a finite container but an ever expanding universe with all the stars contained there in.

(in reply to badpaliden)

Post #: 16

RE: For the married and 24-7,a gut answer question... - 5/9/2006 3:34:57 AM

TigerLily23

Posts: 53
Joined: 12/16/2005
Status: offline

Wife...slave...and in that order....

_____________________________

Lily

Nosce te ipsum...Know Thyself

(in reply to badpaliden)

Post #: 17

RE: For the married and 24-7,a gut answer question... - 5/9/2006 3:40:03 AM

CaptiveRose

Posts: 13
Joined: 9/7/2005
Status: offline

I'm his wife first. the mother of his children second, and slave third. Our vanilla life, right now, for the sake of the children, supercedes the bdsm relationship.

_____________________________

fit to be tied.

(in reply to TigerLily23)

Post #: 18

RE: For the married and 24-7,a gut answer question... - 5/9/2006 4:18:02 AM

kisshou

Posts: 2425
Joined: 2/11/2005
Status: offline

slave

(in reply to badpaliden)

Post #: 19

RE: For the married and 24-7,a gut answer question... - 5/9/2006 5:12:10 AM

sabswife

Posts: 188
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline

wife :)

(in reply to kisshou)

Post #: 20

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