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NorthernGent -> RE: A men-only thread, for bragging. (4/11/2011 1:00:10 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: DarkSteven
It is a well known fact that all wimmins care about is our cocks. That explains all the effort we men put into sending them pictures that show them the little, er, I mean big, fellas.
This thread is for us to preen about our cocks, and boldly proclaim how big they are and thereby declare our masculinity. Failure to exaggerate will make you look like a weenie. In more senses than one.
I''l go first.
My cock is so big that it has its own zip code.
I was about to spin a yarn, but I may as well just tell it how it is.
I was a subject of a documentary a few year back, one of those special human beings who sits outside of the norm. You may have heard of me due to being world famous.
Long story short, I have a second brain in one of my balls and it serves as a sort of exocet missile that seeks, finds and captures. Basically, the documentary concluded that Bill Gates' reasoning capacity is about a 1,000,000th of the power of my left nut. Don't take it to heart, Bill, can't win 'em all.
I just wander around, aimlessly sometimes and not realising that my left nut brain is controlling me, and my left nut does all the work; it is in tune with my head brain. The head brain informs the nut brain that I need brunettes, dark eyes, long dark hair, and the left nut brain informs the woman, through some sort of hypnotism that I haven't quite worked out yet, that it's really in her interests to be snared by me. And they come: in droves. As things stand, I have had some sort of relationship with 2/3rds of the world's brunettes, plus turning down more than my fair share of Swedish blondes, who affable all the same, aren't really what I'm about.
My left nut has a fair sense of humour as this place is like a revolving door - two in, one out - this last month I feel like I'm drowning in brunettes. Too much of a good thing can be a burden. Now and again I wish I was just a normal lad with the same women troubles as everyone else, but thanks to my left nut life's one big fuck from morning til night.
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