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RE: will a sub/slave girl choose Asian master/dom? - 4/22/2011 4:28:57 PM   
juliaoceania


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Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
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quote:

Yes I would see it as just as wrong to be prejudiced against people for their finances, their family background, their weight, their religion and so on. Yes as Julia is saying we are all prejudiced in some way or another, it is human nature to be prejudiced, however some of us fight this and try to judge people on what they say and what they do rather than other factors, while others, like you, glorify prejudice and hail it as your personal truth.


The world is filled with such bigoted and prejudiced people who judge others on things they cannot control instead of the content of their character. The world is changing, slowly, but changing it is. Even though many people harbor ideas like these, they are somewhat less likely to say it openly, unless they have the anonymity of the computer, of course

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to nephandi)
Profile   Post #: 61
RE: will a sub/slave girl choose Asian master/dom? - 4/22/2011 4:37:35 PM   
porcelaine


Posts: 5020
Joined: 7/24/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

I suppose if that was the extent of my commentary on the subject it would indeed be "grandiose", but considering I also said that parents shouldn't butt in unasked it isn't as grandiose as you would paint with the way you quoted me.


i'm not in the habit of speaking for parents because i know people do their own thing behind closed doors. i've encountered individuals with differing degrees of parental involvement for various reasons. i don't take the liberty of saying what is good or bad, but merely indicate what i'm willing to accept in my private life.

But since the subject is intricately linked with her and she is not a common topic of discussion for me on any venue of this nature, this is my final response. i entertained your comments out of respect for our familiarity, but it is sincerely one of those no fly zones where there's nothing you can remotely posit that will reach me. i don't say that to be rude, but i simply don't invite commentary in this area in my life.

Namaste,

~porcelaine

_____________________________

His will; my fate.

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Profile   Post #: 62
RE: will a sub/slave girl choose Asian master/dom? - 4/22/2011 4:44:14 PM   
subbykat


Posts: 115
Joined: 4/9/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: renzhengshu

curious to know how sub/slave girl think of Asian master/dom


Why not? Kind of a strange question. It depends on the Asian Master/Dom.

(in reply to renzhengshu)
Profile   Post #: 63
RE: will a sub/slave girl choose Asian master/dom? - 4/22/2011 4:59:29 PM   
nephandi


Posts: 4470
Joined: 9/23/2005
From: Cold and magickal Norway in a town near Bergen!
Status: offline 		Greetings

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

The world is filled with such bigoted and prejudiced people who judge others on things they cannot control instead of the content of their character. The world is changing, slowly, but changing it is. Even though many people harbor ideas like these, they are somewhat less likely to say it openly, unless they have the anonymity of the computer, of course


Yes thankfully the number of bigoted people are decreasing. What I find so sad though are those that are proud of their prejudice, when I find a prejudice in myself I see it as a flaw and do what I can to get rid off it, I am not always successful, but I do try, some people however call their prejudices brutal truths or some other such nonsense and wear them as a badge to prove that they are better than others, and I am not sure if I should be angry or sad when I meet such people.

I wish you well.


_____________________________

Whatever you think you can do or believe you can do, begin it. Action has magic, grace and power in it.--Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Futon torpedoes, make love not war!--Aswad


(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 64
RE: will a sub/slave girl choose Asian master/dom? - 4/22/2011 5:02:57 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		It isn't prejudice, it's personal preference. Prejudice is using the law to keep the minority downtrodden. Me refusing to date a guy who isn't 6' tall and thus doesn't turn me on, is personal preference. If I had to date and have sex with people I am not attracted to, then I would stay home with my vibrator.

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Profile   Post #: 65
RE: will a sub/slave girl choose Asian master/dom? - 4/22/2011 5:10:44 PM   
nephandi


Posts: 4470
Joined: 9/23/2005
From: Cold and magickal Norway in a town near Bergen!
Status: offline 		Greetings

quote:

i'm not in the habit of speaking for parents because i know people do their own thing behind closed doors.


This in combination with your attitude that parents should be allowed to do whatever they want with their kid's an no one else should dare criticize a parent is what leaves many children in hell as what goes on behind closed doors is not always nice.

quote:

i've encountered individuals with differing degrees of parental involvement for various reasons. i don't take the liberty of saying what is good or bad, but merely indicate what i'm willing to accept in my private life.


Obviously, and while the law say your daughter is mature enough to vote, mature enough to drive, mature enough to buy a gun she better ask her handler's permission first as if it do not fit your personal preferences she is in trouble. You really can not see why people would have a problem with this?

quote:

but it is sincerely one of those no fly zones where there's nothing you can remotely posit that will reach me


I wonder how many psychopaths have said the same. I am not calling you a psychopath here I am just saying that your attitude is quite similar to some of those I have met and seen interviews with.

quote:

i don't say that to be rude, but i simply don't invite commentary in this area in my life.


The areas of my life I do not invite cometary on I do not mention on public forums. Perhaps it is rather that when people did not immediately fall before your feet praising you for having views both on inter racial relationships and the freedoms deserving of an adult daughter more fitting the 1950's than 2011 then you just could not take the criticism?

I wish you well, and I pray that your daughter grow a backbone and decide to take control of her life instead of being controlled by her handler...eh I mean mother.


_____________________________

Whatever you think you can do or believe you can do, begin it. Action has magic, grace and power in it.--Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Futon torpedoes, make love not war!--Aswad


(in reply to porcelaine)
Profile   Post #: 66
RE: will a sub/slave girl choose Asian master/dom? - 4/22/2011 5:37:20 PM   
porcelaine


Posts: 5020
Joined: 7/24/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: nephandi

I wish you well, and I pray that your daughter grow a backbone and decide to take control of her life instead of being controlled by her handler...eh I mean mother.


Your behavior reminds me of the wannabe bullies i see on other sites. You post over and over drilling home a point that the intended party has ignored. You're convinced that repetition makes you appear larger in some fashion. Your pitiful side remarks do nothing and couldn't begin to touch me with a road map provided for your benefit.

You see, i've danced with real movers and shakers. This is but a minstrel show at a paltry carnival. And the mini jabs are akin to arrows that the Lilliputians would vault. It's nothing. Empty. Minuscule.

i've always wondered about people like you. i question what drives them on their virtual crusades and why they sincerely believe that keystrokes would ever intimidate anyone with a modicum of self-esteem. But the very pathetic part is how you keep referencing my daughter in your comments. You cannot let it go. It's almost quasi obsessive in a way. Such strange fruit indeed.

Namaste,

~porcelaine


_____________________________

His will; my fate.

(in reply to nephandi)
Profile   Post #: 67
RE: will a sub/slave girl choose Asian master/dom? - 4/22/2011 5:38:48 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

It isn't prejudice, it's personal preference. Prejudice is using the law to keep the minority downtrodden. Me refusing to date a guy who isn't 6' tall and thus doesn't turn me on, is personal preference. If I had to date and have sex with people I am not attracted to, then I would stay home with my vibrator.



Preference is saying you like tall men... prejudice is when you assume that short men have Napoleon Complexes and are trying to compensate for their lack of stature, and then you stereotype all short men based upon this prejudgment. A bigot is a person that when someone points out to them that they have prejudged a short person as something they are not, and then they stubbornly refuse to let go of that prejudice and cling to it no matter what the evidence of the contrary.


< Message edited by juliaoceania -- 4/22/2011 5:41:29 PM >

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 68
RE: will a sub/slave girl choose Asian master/dom? - 4/22/2011 9:10:47 PM   
Aynne88


Posts: 3873
Joined: 8/29/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: nephandi

Greetings

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

The world is filled with such bigoted and prejudiced people who judge others on things they cannot control instead of the content of their character. The world is changing, slowly, but changing it is. Even though many people harbor ideas like these, they are somewhat less likely to say it openly, unless they have the anonymity of the computer, of course


Yes thankfully the number of bigoted people are decreasing. What I find so sad though are those that are proud of their prejudice, when I find a prejudice in myself I see it as a flaw and do what I can to get rid off it, I am not always successful, but I do try, some people however call their prejudices brutal truths or some other such nonsense and wear them as a badge to prove that they are better than others, and I am not sure if I should be angry or sad when I meet such people.

I wish you well.



Nephandi, are you dating an Asian man or something? Seriously your dog with a bone attitude is weird.  I have spent my entire adult life dating or married to Asian men so please stop this obsession you have with calling me or Porcelaine racist unless of course you know something I do not from two decades of fucking experience. I hardly think you can call me a racist when the man I married and loved is Asian and prior to that all the men I dated were Asian. I am speaking from experience and you are just touting PC bullshit.   


_____________________________

As long as people will shed the blood of innocent creatures there can be no peace, no liberty, no harmony between people. Slaughter and justice cannot dwell together.
—Isaac Bashevis Singer, writer and Nobel laureate (1902–1991)



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Profile   Post #: 69
RE: will a sub/slave girl choose Asian master/dom? - 4/22/2011 9:11:36 PM   
nephandi


Posts: 4470
Joined: 9/23/2005
From: Cold and magickal Norway in a town near Bergen!
Status: offline 		Greetings

quote:

Your behavior reminds me of the wannabe bullies i see on other sites. You post over and over drilling home a point that the intended party has ignored. You're convinced that repetition makes you appear larger in some fashion. Your pitiful side remarks do nothing and couldn't begin to touch me with a road map provided for your benefit.


Believe what you want, however the one I see bullying here is you who bully your own daughter. Now if my words do not affect you then why are you replying?

quote:

You see, i've danced with real movers and shakers. This is but a minstrel show at a paltry carnival. And the mini jabs are akin to arrows that the Lilliputians would vault. It's nothing. Empty. Minuscule.


Oh please you can not stand on your own in a debate so you pull a my daddy is bigger than your daddy argument, seriously this is the best you can do? Where I supposed to be impressed?

quote:

i've always wondered about people like you. i question what drives them on their virtual crusades and why they sincerely believe that keystrokes would ever intimidate anyone with a modicum of self-esteem.


I have always wondered why people like you are are so intimidated by a few key strokes that they make a fool out of themselves on a forum over what others have said.

quote:

But the very pathetic part is how you keep referencing my daughter in your comments. You cannot let it go. It's almost quasi obsessive in a way. Such strange fruit indeed.


Oh did I not immediately obey you once you decided a topic was out of bounds, as how frustrating it have to be for you. Unfortunately for you I am not your poor, brainwashed daughter so I do not have to obey every word you say. Seriously woman you need to stop thinking the world is made to dance to your tune.

I wish you well.


_____________________________

Whatever you think you can do or believe you can do, begin it. Action has magic, grace and power in it.--Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Futon torpedoes, make love not war!--Aswad


(in reply to porcelaine)
Profile   Post #: 70
RE: will a sub/slave girl choose Asian master/dom? - 4/22/2011 9:12:28 PM   
Aynne88


Posts: 3873
Joined: 8/29/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

It isn't prejudice, it's personal preference. Prejudice is using the law to keep the minority downtrodden. Me refusing to date a guy who isn't 6' tall and thus doesn't turn me on, is personal preference. If I had to date and have sex with people I am not attracted to, then I would stay home with my vibrator.



Preference is saying you like tall men... prejudice is when you assume that short men have Napoleon Complexes and are trying to compensate for their lack of stature, and then you stereotype all short men based upon this prejudgment. A bigot is a person that when someone points out to them that they have prejudged a short person as something they are not, and then they stubbornly refuse to let go of that prejudice and cling to it no matter what the evidence of the contrary.



Julia so what is it then if you did indeed spend 20 plus years with short men and found that they shared traits you did not enjoy and chose to not date another one?


_____________________________

As long as people will shed the blood of innocent creatures there can be no peace, no liberty, no harmony between people. Slaughter and justice cannot dwell together.
—Isaac Bashevis Singer, writer and Nobel laureate (1902–1991)



(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 71
RE: will a sub/slave girl choose Asian master/dom? - 4/22/2011 9:16:51 PM   
nephandi


Posts: 4470
Joined: 9/23/2005
From: Cold and magickal Norway in a town near Bergen!
Status: offline 		Greetings

quote:

Nephandi, are you dating an Asian man or something? Seriously your dog with a bone attitude is weird.  I have spent my entire adult life dating or married to Asian men so please stop this obsession you have with calling me or Porcelaine racist unless of course you know something I do not from two decades of fucking experience. I hardly think you can call me a racist when the man I married and loved is Asian and prior to that all the men I dated were Asian. I am speaking from experience and you are just touting PC bullshit.


No I am not dating an Asian man, I however have enough wisdom not to judge everyone based on their race. The few men you have dated are not experience with the whole Asian race or are you saying every man of Asian decent have been between your legs? You are like a person who have had a few bad experiences with black people and then turn around and say everyone who is black is a certain way no matter their nationality, personality or upbringing. You are stereotyping a whole raced based on your few relationships, that it racism plain and simple.

I wish you well


_____________________________

Whatever you think you can do or believe you can do, begin it. Action has magic, grace and power in it.--Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Futon torpedoes, make love not war!--Aswad


(in reply to Aynne88)
Profile   Post #: 72
RE: will a sub/slave girl choose Asian master/dom? - 4/22/2011 10:08:52 PM   
porcelaine


Posts: 5020
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: nephandi

Oh did I not immediately obey you once you decided a topic was out of bounds, as how frustrating it have to be for you. Unfortunately for you I am not your poor, brainwashed daughter so I do not have to obey every word you say. Seriously woman you need to stop thinking the world is made to dance to your tune.


You seem determined to tell me how i should live, think, interact with my daughter, etc. It's freakish. Pretty soon you'll be addressing helpful hints to my inbox and infecting me with your presence with the heartfelt intent of liberating the oppressed. But that's merely a smokescreen. It really isn't any of that. You get off on the interaction.

Does it trip your switch? Fill a space that you cannot plug? Help a girl out! Because seriously, your behavior has the makings of homegrown batshit. But true to form you are adding a touch of 'elegance' to the process. A new fangled stalker chic i suppose. In a captivated demented kind of way of course. i think i need a protector.

Namaste,

~porcelaine


_____________________________

His will; my fate.

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Profile   Post #: 73
RE: will a sub/slave girl choose Asian master/dom? - 4/23/2011 12:09:45 AM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline 		FR~ to no one in particular.

The part that I've not seen a lot of in this particular discussion (or perhaps I didn't read it well enough and missed this) is the reality that CULTURE does play a part in an individual's development, outlook on the world, understanding of gender and gender roles, heck how one does the dishes and what a toilet is supposed to look like and what kind of bed people sleep on. Every aspect of our lives is touched by culture. To pretend that people of a certain group (any group) do not have similarities based on their upbringing and their culture is just blindness by choice.

There are absolute truths about certain people. DNA, genes, biology. There are ALSO cultural similarities that are generally true about large swaths of people. To say that one person is very extended-family focused is THE EXACT SAME THING as saying they are momma's boys. It's just saying the same thing through one's own filter. It does not change the fact that culturally speaking, the people of that group (whatever the group is) tend to be family-centered rather than individual-centered.

Depending on one's perspective, different traits will be seen in positive or negative ways. This is also not racism in my mind, but it is understanding the world through one's own cultural lens. For example, here in Korea it is perfectly acceptable for older people to push and shove younger people - even if it makes the younger person fall down and get hurt. It is considered respectful to allow them that, and the younger person will apologize for being in the wrong place. The older person has after all earned that level of patience from the younger people. This is a cultural norm that the people follow. I have never seen anyone act as if anything is amiss. A waygook, on the other hand, (that's "foreigner") from a more individual-focused society will not have that same perspective because of cultural norms which they have integrated WITHOUT the age hierarchy. In that case, the older person will be seen as an asshole / jerk / bitch and the waygook may find themselves yelling at the older person, putting them "in their place" so to speak. Exact same experience with completely different consequences based on culturally based norms. Which person is right? Neither? Both? It is merely experiencing something with different attitude and lens.

We can not ignore the impact that culture plays upon people. That ladies are arguing in public (even if it is online) is a product of culture. Perhaps trying to pretend to be who you are not in another culture by honoring their culture might be quite a learning experience. I've certainly found it to be so. I hold to the quote from Anna and the King - While I may respect your culture, I have not forgotten my own. Most expats that live this kind of lifestyle tend to have a similar attitude. There are some things we do not compromise on, but most things we do. For me, safety is not something I'm willing to compromise even if it violates the cultural norms of the place I'm living in. And that, of course, is an individual-focused, self-reliant cultural norm from my own upbringing.

Personally, I choose to not date Korean men - as a general practice. However, there have been a few that I've met that I would gladly date PROVIDED they were removed from this culture or it was not a serious relationship. It is the culture that puts tremendous pressure on people to behave in certain ways. I would find it unacceptable that my man would be required to go out and drink to oblivion with his work colleagues and that he would have to be with a prostitute just because his boss said so. I would not put myself in the position to be with a man who was forced into that position because of the cultural norms. The culture is what it is, and most people are not able to fight that level of pressure. The morality of it does not mesh with my own.

You may call me racist if you'd like. I call myself a realist.

best,
sunshine


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Profile   Post #: 74
RE: will a sub/slave girl choose Asian master/dom? - 4/23/2011 6:09:00 AM   
thishereboi


Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
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quote:


You have a problem because the individual is Asian. Would the idea go down if money were involved? Or background? Or would that upset your sensibilities as well? i'm not suggesting that the subject is comfortable for everyone. But i'm well aware that people exercise all measure of criteria when choosing a partner and as much as we'd prefer to think some things are never taken into consideration that isn't always the case.


Actually it wouldn't make any difference to my why you think you have to be the one to pick your daughters boyfriend. I also don't buy into the post about that claims you are only doing it because you don't think she has enough sense to pick the right man. Maybe if you had raised her to think for herself you wouldn't have to bother with this. You could just trust her to pick someone she wanted to be with.

Now are you going to answer the question or not? What are you going to do when she pops up with an asian boyfriend?


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This here is the boi formerly known as orfunboi


(in reply to porcelaine)
Profile   Post #: 75
RE: will a sub/slave girl choose Asian master/dom? - 4/23/2011 6:16:12 AM   
thishereboi


Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
Status: offline 		Well as long as she is sitting there, perhaps you could ask her a question.

How would she feel if she saw a cute white boy in the park and approached him. They started talking and seemed to hit it off. Then his mother walks over grabs his arm and drags him away. Later she finds out that although the guy really like her, his mother doesn't allow him to date blacks. Nothing racist about that is there? I bet it makes you both feel all warm and fuzzy to know his mother is looking out for her sons best interest right?


_____________________________

"Sweetie, you're wasting your gum" .. Albert


This here is the boi formerly known as orfunboi


(in reply to porcelaine)
Profile   Post #: 76
RE: will a sub/slave girl choose Asian master/dom? - 4/23/2011 6:24:31 AM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline 		Certainly I can't speak for porcelaine, but I would like to address something about this. There was a gal who approached me while I was talking with a French man. When she arrived, I introduced them. She turned to him, and she said, "J'taime" (sp)... And both he and I were shocked. I asked her if she knew what it meant, she said no, and I told her "Don't say that to a French man.". She asked why not. He and I exchanged odd looks, and we both said AT THE SAME TIME, "Because French men are very dangerous." We then went on to talk about how the French man is a product of his culture and can easily break a woman's heart. It was all very positive and laugher filled, with all appreciating the interaction.

Was it racist / xenophobic of me to say that French men are dangerous? I don't think it was. I adore French men. (And they adore me oo la la). They ARE dangerous to a naive young woman's heart, though. And if you don't know that, you've never met a French man. *laughs*

There IS a reality about certain cultures. I don't mind warnign naive, younger people about them. My grandfather and grandmother told me that "boys are after only one thing." Is that sexist? I don't think so. This is the same way I see porcelaine's discussion with her daughter. Do I know this to be fact? No. (and please feel free to correct me if I'm wrong, porcelaine).

I do know mothers. And I know grandparents. And I know ME when my niece was beginning to date. And I know about different cultures.

I daresay that were porcelaine's daughter to show up at the door with an Asian boyfriend, she would be gracious and kind and accepting. I expect she knows her daughter well enough to trust her judgment, to know she had considered a number of factors (including cultural differences) before deciding to embark on what truly can be a difficult reality. I also expect that porcelaine would see the PERSON and not the RACE.

It is not uncommon for authority figures to warn naive, younger people about consequences of their behavior, to look deeper at a problem, to watch out for some commonalities. To pretend otherwise is naive.

best,
sunshine

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to thishereboi)
Profile   Post #: 77
RE: will a sub/slave girl choose Asian master/dom? - 4/23/2011 6:34:45 AM   
thishereboi


Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
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quote:

I daresay that were porcelaine's daughter to show up at the door with an Asian boyfriend, she would be gracious and kind and accepting.
I would hope so, but she refuses to answer the question, so we will never know.

I expect she knows her daughter well enough to trust her judgment, to know she had considered a number of factors (including cultural differences) before deciding to embark on what truly can be a difficult reality.
Well according to her post one of the reasons she has decided to make the restriction was because her daughter lacked the judgment skills to decide for herself.

I also expect that porcelaine would see the PERSON and not the RACE.
If that there were true, she would be dismissing the potential boyfriends one at a time as they proved themselves unworthy. She wouldn't put a blanket restriction on "all asian men"


_____________________________

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This here is the boi formerly known as orfunboi


(in reply to sunshinemiss)
Profile   Post #: 78
RE: will a sub/slave girl choose Asian master/dom? - 4/23/2011 6:38:21 AM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline 		It's interesting to see that you are focusing on one person and not the topic. I've asked some pretty pointed questions, made a number of observations about culture, given examples, and yet you just want to hound one woman about her relationship with her daughter.

I suppose it's easier to do that than it is to address an actual issue.

best,
sunshine

< Message edited by sunshinemiss -- 4/23/2011 7:01:18 AM >

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

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Profile   Post #: 79
RE: will a sub/slave girl choose Asian master/dom? - 4/23/2011 6:40:12 AM   
domiguy


Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline 		I believe that 99% of all Asian men should be jettisoned into the Sun along with all of our elderly.....And Filipinos.

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Profile   Post #: 80
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