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RE: Vanilla Sex...is it still possible? - 5/24/2006 12:12:10 PM   
dogobedience


Posts: 536
Joined: 3/30/2006
Status: offline 		What is vanilla sex? By some it is missionary, others it could be hanging upside down. 
When I  think of vanilla sex it involves NOTHING that this lifestyle offers........so no vanilla sex for me EVER. I like sex 3-5 times per day if I have time, but it will always be me in control and the property simply something I use for my pleasure!! 
Sorry if this offends some here (WTF!), I am a REAL DOM and I treat girls as property....to use......and they NEED THAT   

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RE: Vanilla Sex...is it still possible? - 5/24/2006 1:23:13 PM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline 		That depends entirely what you mean by vanilla sex. once the actual Fucking starts it is pretty much the same....it is the lead-up and the preipherals that make it BDSM. Some need to be tied up to enjoy it, others just need to be spanked first....it all depends, but yes, vanilla sex is possible and is enjoyable, it depends entirely on the dynamic the two people involved have established.

For example He bends his wife over the table and takes her from behind.....Master bends sub over the table and fucks her...what is the difference?

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RE: Vanilla Sex...is it still possible? - 5/24/2006 5:19:27 PM   
txpet


Posts: 200
Joined: 4/29/2006
Status: offline 		i may be a bit backwards.
i found vanilla sex boring. The only way i could cum during vanilla sex was if the clit itself was highly stimulated.
Master trained me to like and enjoy vanilla sex. He thinks i should be well-rounded and able to enjoy all the different ways i can be used ... and vanilla is one of those ways.
i still prefer KINK and/or pain mixed in but i can enjoy vanilla with or without the clit being touched.
Thank You, Master.

(in reply to TigerLily23)
Profile   Post #: 63
RE: Vanilla Sex...is it still possible? - 5/24/2006 5:50:09 PM   
sharainks


Posts: 499
Joined: 12/13/2004
Status: offline 		I guess that it would depend on how you define vanilla sex.  If its no oral, no anal, then I've never been vanilla and wouldn't know what to do. 

If its sex that is tender, loving and gentle with lots of oral, some anal and plenty of multiple orgasms then sure I'll go for that. 
I also tend to like variety.   About 3 years after I got into bdsm I met a man I liked and he wasn't into bdsm at all.  However I had my first multiple orgasms with him.  Vanilla has a lot to be said for it when you and your partner lose count at 30+orgasm in a two hour period. 

Only one dom has ever gotten me into that zone.  Sometimes I think the focus is too much on bdsm and too little about good sex.  I don't know about other women but I get a whole lot more open to trying new things after a couple dozen orgasms.

(in reply to txpet)
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RE: Vanilla Sex...is it still possible? - 5/24/2006 6:06:08 PM   
champagnewishes


Posts: 1310
Joined: 10/31/2005
From: Orange County
Status: offline 		Again, it depends on your definition of "vanilla sex".  I have known Doms who will have a "quickie" from time to time that falls within my definition of vanilla sex.... Thankfully those times are rare. 

I also have been with Doms who have used what i would consider vanilla sex as a warm up...  Thankfully that was only the start up to more satisfying things. 

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RE: Vanilla Sex...is it still possible? - 5/25/2006 2:31:50 AM   
Kedikat


Posts: 680
Joined: 4/20/2006
Status: offline 		My definition of vanilla sex is, " If we want to have a kid, we have to " Other than that, it is for erotic sexual pleasure.....at least for one partner :)
Almost no such thing as vanilla sex, just all the various hues of it. You can do missionary every time.........but what's in your mind? You can suspend and burn out batteries and leave leather smoking, and still yawn if it is the same old same old..........

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Profile   Post #: 66
RE: Vanilla Sex...is it still possible? - 5/25/2006 3:48:12 AM   
agirl


Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Kedikat

My definition of vanilla sex is, " If we want to have a kid, we have to " Other than that, it is for erotic sexual pleasure.....at least for one partner :)
Almost no such thing as vanilla sex, just all the various hues of it. You can do missionary every time.........but what's in your mind? You can suspend and burn out batteries and leave leather smoking, and still yawn if it is the same old same old..........



My view also. I see sex as....well, sex. I haven't felt a difference between TYPE of sex........just TYPE of partner and the mindset at the time.

agirl

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Profile   Post #: 67
RE: Vanilla Sex...is it still possible? - 5/25/2006 7:35:19 AM   
iliv2servher


Posts: 228
Joined: 5/17/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig

That depends entirely what you mean by vanilla sex. once the actual Fucking starts it is pretty much the same....


The term "vanilla" or "vanilla sex" is probably used to describe anything sexual that does not include elements of BDSM, D/S or any type of deviant behavior during the sex act.  
 
BDSM and D/S activities, as are other aspects of life, cannot be defined in exact terms.  And in my opinion, nothing is black and white. 
 
Perhaps the lexicon of WIITWD (What It Is That We Do) has not caught up with the times.  But I *do* believe that we have a consensus of opinion about what some call "kinky sex" and what others call "straight sex." 

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RE: Vanilla Sex...is it still possible? - 5/25/2006 11:47:29 AM   
txpet


Posts: 200
Joined: 4/29/2006
Status: offline 		It DOES all depend on the defintion of vanilla.
i'm finding a difficulty in discussing a lot of things because of defintions and words getting in the way. For instance ... i like pain but i don't like things that are painful. The way i use the word painful is whatever is beyond my pain threshold. Makes things confusing.
There is sex that is not oral, not anal, not BDSM and not missionary .. is that vanilla?

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Profile   Post #: 69
RE: Vanilla Sex...is it still possible? - 5/25/2006 11:49:52 AM   
txpet


Posts: 200
Joined: 4/29/2006
Status: offline 		::smile::

"deviant"
"straight sex"

These still are not defined, and possibly can not be.

Everything is subjective.
::smile::

(in reply to iliv2servher)
Profile   Post #: 70
RE: Vanilla Sex...is it still possible? - 5/25/2006 1:45:03 PM   
iliv2servher


Posts: 228
Joined: 5/17/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: txpet

It DOES all depend on the defintion of vanilla.
i'm finding a difficulty in discussing a lot of things because of defintions and words getting in the way. For instance ... i like pain but i don't like things that are painful. The way i use the word painful is whatever is beyond my pain threshold. Makes things confusing.

There is sex that is not oral, not anal, not BDSM and not missionary .. is that vanilla?
::smile:



Why not just say, "I like pain, but I do have limits."?  It's just a matter of finding a different way to explain it, then hopefully the person with whom you are involved will understand.

After talking with a number of people in the scene, I've come to the conclusion that you actually have to initiate a discussion period with them before you can expect them to always know what you are talking about.  Here on the CM Forums, people are a bit more sophisticated than someone who just happens to pop into a munch for the first time.

I think that the consensus opinion of what is considered to be "vanilla sex"  is usually defined by popular useage of the time.  For instance, oral sex wasn't as popular or mainstream until Bill Clinton proclaimed that he didn't have sexual relations with Monica Lewinsky.  In his view, or in his defense, he inferred that he didn't think that oral sex was the same as having sexual relations.  So, does that mean that oral sex is now in the catagory of vanilla?
Probably.  Leave it to our political leaders to make policy decisions and put their own spin on things. 

quote:

 

"deviant"
"straight sex"

These still are not defined, and possibly can not be.

Everything is subjective.
::smile:



By Jove, I think you've got it!  *LOL*  Yes, I agree that everything is subjective.


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RE: Vanilla Sex...is it still possible? - 5/25/2006 2:28:46 PM   
LadyCompassion


Posts: 87
Joined: 11/4/2005
Status: offline 		I think it depends totally on the individuals involved. Once some people are "awakened" they will never be the same as they were before and they will never really want vanilla sex again. But other people are going to love the new and still be able to enjoy the vanilla sex the same as they did before.
For me, however, I like vanilla sex every now and then. Its not my number one preference but I can appreciate it from time to time. But I do catch myself while having vanilla sex wishing for him to do something that is definitely not vanilla. So...maybe one can have vanilla sex with the body but in their head still be longing for something else.

(in reply to TigerLily23)
Profile   Post #: 72
RE: Vanilla Sex...is it still possible? - 5/25/2006 3:53:15 PM   
txpet


Posts: 200
Joined: 4/29/2006
Status: offline 		i responded and i believe it got lost ... if this is the second response, please forgive me.
i used the pain and painful simply as an illustration. i do try to come to a common definition with whoever i am speaking to but unfortunately sometimes forget what the definition is .. in that case, i use my definition and remind them what i mean.
Of course,when i am allowed to play before playing, i do clearly state the rules and limits.

Everything is subjective ... keeps life interesting! 
::smile::

(in reply to iliv2servher)
Profile   Post #: 73
RE: Vanilla Sex...is it still possible? - 5/25/2006 4:42:03 PM   
Sub03


Posts: 600
Joined: 4/30/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: littlesubjess

Vanilla Sex ?

no no no ... no way ... no ... not a chance, not a prayer, no way .... no ... no ... not ever ever ever ... no no no .....lol

there is no way i would EVER even comtemplate it.... i would rather watch paint dry .... i often wonder how 99.9% of the population survives on vanilla ... i surely would die of boredom ... ughh i could not imagine a fate worse than death....

i however, such is life ... but i wouldnt swap this life(stlye) for the world ... bdsm is the ONLY way for me .....

jess xxx


In total and complete agreement. I could never go back. Vanilla sex holds absoulutely no appeal to me once so ever. But then it all depends on what you consider vanilla sex. Anything i do with my Master whether its me tied up and having sex or me and Master just cuddling i dont consider it vanilla because the D/s dynamic is still there. To me vanilla sex is with a person that is completely vanilla with absoulutely no kink thrown in. That i could never do again.

< Message edited by Sub03 -- 5/25/2006 4:45:45 PM >

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RE: Vanilla Sex...is it still possible? - 5/25/2006 5:09:16 PM   
txpet


Posts: 200
Joined: 4/29/2006
Status: offline
[/quote]

In total and complete agreement. I could never go back. Vanilla sex holds absoulutely no appeal to me once so ever. But then it all depends on what you consider vanilla sex. Anything i do with my Master whether its me tied up and having sex or me and Master just cuddling i dont consider it vanilla because the D/s dynamic is still there. To me vanilla sex is with a person that is completely vanilla with absoulutely no kink thrown in. That i could never do again.
[/quote]

i agree. No matter what i do, if i am with Master, it can not be true vanilla because i am always aware of the fact that this is Master. His being my Master does not end at a certain time or in certain circumstances ... He just is.
However, if Master were to arrange for a playmate for me and the playmate want vanilla, it still would not be vanilla for me because it is doing something arranged by Master and therefore, Master is still in control.
As long as i am a slave nothing i do is vanilla.
Though there are some things that may be more vanilla than other things ::wink::

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Profile   Post #: 75
RE: Vanilla Sex...is it still possible? - 5/25/2006 5:21:31 PM   
impishlilhellcat


Posts: 4379
Joined: 3/26/2006
Status: offline 		After my relationship ended with my Previous Dom I considered going back to vanilla. I just didn't think I would be able to serve or trust anyone that much again. However, I found out VERY quickly after two vanilla dates with the same man that me being vanilla was never ever going to happen again. I had evolved and learned too much from my last relationship and I would never be happy being just vanilla or even having just vanilla sex every again. I making this transition into a pain slut with my last Dom and I found that I crave and love the pain and serving and pleasing far too much... Serving and pleasing  freaks out the nilla guys.

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RE: Vanilla Sex...is it still possible? - 5/25/2006 5:26:40 PM   
Tamerofwild1s


Posts: 1765
Joined: 12/5/2004
Status: offline 		well impish it sounds like the "previous Dom" was some guy . He must be one hell of a guy. I could never do vamilla sex either . theres just not enough stimulation in it for me. that ol song rough and ready seems about right ... wanna hook up with a stud lil girl huh? <licks my eyebrows fer ya>
 
GIT er Doneeeeeeee

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Profile   Post #: 77
RE: Vanilla Sex...is it still possible? - 5/25/2006 5:43:20 PM   
impishlilhellcat


Posts: 4379
Joined: 3/26/2006
Status: offline 		Hrrrm I dunno I think that last Dom was awwwwwwwful conceited and mean...  Are you sure you still wanna hook up ya big stud muffin you? <batts my eyelashes at you> And we can only hook up iffen ya let me call ya Big Daddy :P

< Message edited by impishlilhellcat -- 5/25/2006 5:45:11 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 78
RE: Vanilla Sex...is it still possible? - 5/25/2006 5:47:35 PM   
Tamerofwild1s


Posts: 1765
Joined: 12/5/2004
Status: offline 		ok like is this cyber sex now .. I kinda get warm and fuzzy being called Big Daddy ... have you been naughty or good ... lol. I have it on inside information too that last Dom was never mean or Sadistic

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Profile   Post #: 79
RE: Vanilla Sex...is it still possible? - 5/25/2006 5:50:36 PM   
impishlilhellcat


Posts: 4379
Joined: 3/26/2006
Status: offline 		Aww it's too bad that you say that cause I just have a thing for Mean, Evil, Sadistic Bastids and for the naughty or good thing pffft... take a wild guess

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