sexyred1
Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
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quote:
ORIGINAL: aromanholiday
quote:
ORIGINAL: highhopes4us
i really thought that i would find some replies here from subs that are well like minded...
Understood and for what it's worth, I believe the above was an honest response to the dismal negativism you got in response to a perfectly decent question. There's no need to apologize for it unless you are ordered to be polite to everybody no matter how they treat you. But you have to give it some time (a few days at least). There are a lot of different people here. Not all of us are infected with the poision that's been shot at you. Those who are not tend to have full lives, are not on here 24/7, so may not get by to respond to you immediately. :) ....
I read further and saw the mis-post comment. I even remarked up on it. My statement above still holds. I am not the least bit impressed with the initial replies to you. 
So, back to your original post:
quote:
I have a Master whom i adore....Master has taught me ALOT.....I am collared and enjoy serving my Master...my question is ,i find myself wanting to service master all the time....i guess its neediness....is there any other subs that feel like that?
(raises hand high...in a fist)
I feel exactly the way you do. Under a good master, this feeling never dies, in my experience. If anything, it gets stronger. I'm very experienced with slavery, which typically involves intense service and an intense love of service. I've been doing this for years, and I've never once experienced the so-called sub-frenzy state. I am naturally sober, calm, and careful and take the important things slow, even when I experience the emotional equivalent of finding a great treasure. But once I've verified the "treasure" is real, I always feel what you've described toward my master. And as time passes, it grows stronger. It is neediness, yes, but it's a very fine and laudable neediness. Would that more submissives experienced it. It's an emotion that, in my mind, sets off those with slave potential from those without it. A person needs that sort of passion to become complete chattel. Slavery can be very hard. This emotion, this need to serve someone you have ascertained is great, is the engine that gets you through the harder times. It is necessary to feel this.
I've found it difficult to find a master who wants to own and control me and take my service to the same intense degree that I want to give it. Most dominants I have met shy away from such intensity and need. The ones who do not are pretty rare. But I've run into them before. A handful, over a span of 20 years (to be fair I was "well occupied" during a good number of those years and not specifically looking--so maybe there are more than my personal statistics suggest). I know they exist. With a little luck, I expect I will become enslaved again to one such person in the future.
Even when you find an extremely controlling individual, your counterpart, there will be things that require adjustment on your part. Things that surprise you, things you find hard. One is that your need to serve is always harnessed his way, not yours. He may have you serving him in a manner that you do not expect or maybe even do not like. But if you truly love and need to serve, this is a relatively minor issue. (Word of warning: I have run into imitation dominants too, who say all the right words, strike all the right poses, but who, at heart, really don't want to bother with controlling someone. They take a noticeable lack of interest in your desire to serve and they do not engage it. They call this marked disinterest dominating their way, and for someone who really loves to obey, it can be hard to tell the difference between them and the real thing--but their lack of slow, gradual involvement in your life or taking the reins of control as well as your feeling of being "unused" are dead giveaways.)
Another thing that takes getting used to, and its not something you'd expect if your need to serve is extremely strong, is that some kinds of service will be hard for you. Even if you are most willing and believe you won't have any trouble carrying out any command, there are some that will trip you up. This happens, I think, because we weren't raised to live completely surrendered, we were raised to be competent, independent people, and so we have egos (much as we may not like them) and pride and lots of other urges and tendencies that work against good service. Dealing with those is something every submissive who truly needs to serve faces. It's not very pleasant to realize how much of an ego you still have and to see the many tricky ways it manifests itself. :( But with each such challenge you encounter and overcome, you feel happier and happier, more devoted to your master...and, in my experience at least, wanting to serve him, more and more.
Jeez, a little dramatic aren't you? Infected with poison?? What thread are you on? I did not read one post where they were being poisonous or mean.
As for the rest of your post, it is has too much One True Submissve Way for me to take the time to comment and it would be a derail.
Edited to say that the erudite and estimable Sunshinemiss beat me to it with her post.
It is always ironic that those who claim no one here has a life seem to be on here the same amount for how else would they know who was online?
Assumptions, they can a bitch.
< Message edited by sexyred1 -- 5/25/2011 5:06:48 PM >
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RE: sub being needy - 
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