Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Where do i pay for fantasy


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> Where do i pay for fantasy Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Where do i pay for fantasy - 5/25/2011 6:24:45 AM   
TheAmazinSub


Posts: 4
Joined: 5/25/2011
Status: offline 		Hello Mistresses =) I just turned 18 and i'm essentially interested in paying a Femdom to fulfill my fetish desires. So i have a few embarassing questions..

1.) Where do i go about finding these places? I'm not interested in attending a club, I want to go to a professional femdom environment, and pay for a few fetishes, that's all...

2.) Isn't 18 old enough, or do i have to be 21?

3.) I REALLY REALLY want to be tied up /handcuffed & beatened (punching/kicking/smacking), spanked (belt), AND bad breath smelling. Lol i'd like it to be VERY realistic, like as if she was actually trying to beat me. I want to feel it DAYS after, I want to have marks...Would MOST do it exactly like that? (Idk how it works)

4.) How much would you GUESS the above would cost (bad breath, punching/kicking, and brutal spanking)

5.) Are the sessions USUALLY recorded, so i can watch it later or no?

I don't plan on telling them i never really experienced any of the fetishes i'd like to accomplish (Besides getting hit with the belt earlier in life), but please don't suggest me to have them go lighter on me. That would be a waste of my money, and not my fantasy..Also can you please tell me how the place USUALLY works (Like do they charge hourly, do they do the fantasy exactly how the SLAVE likes)..I'd hate to go and embarass my self, just to find out they won't accept my request.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Where do i pay for fantasy - 5/25/2011 6:36:45 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline 		1. Do a google with your location and dominatrix or dungeon
2. I guess it depends where you are
3. Up to you and her to discuss it (sorry, not suppling wank fodder)
4. Depending where you are, I guess somewhere between $200 and $300
5. NO

You call them or email them in advance and negotiate what you want to have done, not every Domme will cater to every fetish.

I would also suggest that you are honest with them, they won't go lighter, but they might just help you to get into the mood and explain a few things, you know if you're in there they will be able to tell from your reactions that you're new.

Oh and bear in mind, while something might look very hot in a video, the actual sensations might not be to your liking at all, you might find out the hard way that you are not a masochist...

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to TheAmazinSub)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Where do i pay for fantasy - 5/25/2011 6:45:28 AM   
ChatteParfaitt


Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
Status: offline 		Alrighty then. TheAmazinSub has listed himself as a dominant in his profile.

OP: This speaks of some confusion which you might want to clear up before you spend big bucks on a fem domme.

As to your other questions, a good fem domme gets paid to fulfill your fetishes. Look for the Max Fisch (sp?) ads for pro dommes. And remember: cheapest is not always best.

I would avoid a pro that did not have a dungeon, and was not an expert. Which means avoid prostitutes, they just play at being domme.

Tell your pro the truth about your experience or lack thereof. They are like any professional, they more they know, the better service they will give.

Good luck.


_____________________________



(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Where do i pay for fantasy - 5/25/2011 6:58:11 AM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline 		Amazin, they will know if you are lying. Trust me. A pro domme can clock a man a mile away. Tell the truth. You have nothing to lose.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to ChatteParfaitt)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Where do i pay for fantasy - 5/25/2011 7:05:00 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt


I would avoid a pro that did not have a dungeon, and was not an expert. Which means avoid prostitutes, they just play at being domme.




A lot of pros rent dungeon space, it's quite common, real estate and equipment (not to mention sound proofing) tend to be very expensive and a lot of them have vanilla careers as well to avoid the burn out and being too financially dependent on domming.

Now what I find a bit odd is, the OP couldn't find out anything like that, but he signed up today and hit us with that question... I would think if he found us so easily, he would find more about dungeons and dommes in his area with a simple google search...

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to ChatteParfaitt)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Where do i pay for fantasy - 5/25/2011 7:06:52 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

Amazin, they will know if you are lying. Trust me. A pro domme can clock a man a mile away. Tell the truth. You have nothing to lose.


I think the question "What kind of experience do you have" and then a few detailed questions will tell them pretty much if he's making stuff up or not.

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Where do i pay for fantasy - 5/25/2011 7:09:55 AM   
TheAmazinSub


Posts: 4
Joined: 5/25/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt
Alrighty then. TheAmazinSub has listed himself as a dominant in his profile.

OP: This speaks of some confusion which you might want to clear up before you spend big bucks on a fem domme.


Oops! Believe me, I'm far from a dominant person unforunately =( I was in a rush when creating this profile, and i wasn't paying attention. I intended on going back to edit my profile explicitly later when i was in the mood to.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

Oh and bear in mind, while something might look very hot in a video, the actual sensations might not be to your liking at all, you might find out the hard way that you are not a masochist...

I mean, it turns me on just thinking about it. For years i ALWAYS fantasize about it. I may not be a hardcore one, but i know i'm one, even if it's just light..I'll find out when i go.


Thanks for the replies so far =)

(in reply to ChatteParfaitt)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Where do i pay for fantasy - 5/25/2011 7:10:53 AM   
ChatteParfaitt


Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze


quote:

ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt


I would avoid a pro that did not have a dungeon, and was not an expert. Which means avoid prostitutes, they just play at being domme.




A lot of pros rent dungeon space, it's quite common, real estate and equipment (not to mention sound proofing) tend to be very expensive and a lot of them have vanilla careers as well to avoid the burn out and being too financially dependent on domming.

Now what I find a bit odd is, the OP couldn't find out anything like that, but he signed up today and hit us with that question... I would think if he found us so easily, he would find more about dungeons and dommes in his area with a simple google search...


Well I meant more "have access to dungeon space." I didn't mean the pro had to own the space, my assumption is most share.

And I agree, a pro will know in a NY second if the OP has experience or not.

I think he's looking for recommendations (I would be). Perhaps someone from Tulsa will steer him in the right direction.


_____________________________



(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Where do i pay for fantasy - 5/25/2011 7:18:16 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TheAmazinSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

Oh and bear in mind, while something might look very hot in a video, the actual sensations might not be to your liking at all, you might find out the hard way that you are not a masochist...

I mean, it turns me on just thinking about it. For years i ALWAYS fantasize about it. I may not be a hardcore one, but i know i'm one, even if it's just light..I'll find out when i go.


Thanks for the replies so far =)


Well, a few years ago when I was a pro domme, a guy came to me and wanted a brutal harsh whipping, OWK style, no warm up, told him I won't do it without warm up, dangers and all and nope, not a bullwhip, single tail... Asked him about the experience he had and he mentioned quite a lot of crops, paddles and whips, sounded believable, so I warmed him up and he started screaming and yelling like crazy, I thought he hasn't safeworded and it's part of his game (some people get off on that) mind you at that point it was still just a spanking with my bare hands. He was trashing and yelling so much, that I thought I risk "breaking the mood", especially since he yelled that he had "forgotten this freaking word that makes you stop", turns out he couldn't take even a spanking. I sat him down, reminded him of the "experience" he claimed, and he told me that he did watch those videos so often....

It wasn't a nice experience for him, so just be honest and let them guide you, they do have more experience and can lead you in another direction in case one thing doesn't work out as it did in your fantasy...

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to TheAmazinSub)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Where do i pay for fantasy - 5/25/2011 7:20:49 AM   
TheAmazinSub


Posts: 4
Joined: 5/25/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TheAmazinSub

I don't plan on telling them i never really experienced any of the fetishes i'd like to accomplish


I didn't exactly say i planned on being dishonest, I was implying if they didn't ask, i didn't plan on telling them i was new..

(in reply to TheAmazinSub)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Where do i pay for fantasy - 5/25/2011 7:24:07 AM   
ChatteParfaitt


Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
Status: offline 		If they don't ask about your past experience, run (don't walk) away.

A pro will have an intake type of interview (or perhaps questionnaire) to determine experience level, fetishes and fantasies, possible medical issues, etc.


_____________________________



(in reply to TheAmazinSub)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Where do i pay for fantasy - 5/25/2011 7:25:10 AM   
ChatteParfaitt


Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
Status: offline
quote:

mind you at that point it was still just a spanking with my bare hands. He was trashing and yelling so much, that I thought I risk "breaking the mood", especially since he yelled that he had "forgotten this freaking word that makes you stop", turns out he couldn't take even a spanking.


Okay that did crack me up.




_____________________________



(in reply to ChatteParfaitt)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Where do i pay for fantasy - 5/25/2011 7:25:43 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze
. . . mind you at that point it was still just a spanking with my bare hands. He was trashing and yelling so much . . .


Seriously - even just a spanking? Were you using a knuckleduster or something?

_____________________________

http://www.domme-chronicles.com


(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Where do i pay for fantasy - 5/25/2011 7:29:01 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TheAmazinSub


quote:

ORIGINAL: TheAmazinSub

I don't plan on telling them i never really experienced any of the fetishes i'd like to accomplish


I didn't exactly say i planned on being dishonest, I was implying if they didn't ask, i didn't plan on telling them i was new..



Oooh, that sounds like a bad news policy, TAS. Imagine if they're used to men who are really, really into getting beaten up. Besides, I'm certain that an experienced pro-domme will know that you're holding back on the truth, and once she sees that, she might just lose the confidence to do anything at all.

_____________________________

http://www.domme-chronicles.com


(in reply to TheAmazinSub)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Where do i pay for fantasy - 5/25/2011 7:29:18 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline 		Nope, and I don't even have huge hands or anything, he just seriously couldn't take any pain, in his fantasy he possibly could and I am sure there was a lot of rhythmic movement going on while he watched various OWK videos where guys were whipped and possibly convinced himself he would be able to endure it, just when he felt actual pain, he simply couldn't take it.

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to PeonForHer)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Where do i pay for fantasy - 5/25/2011 7:34:19 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

Nope, and I don't even have huge hands or anything, he just seriously couldn't take any pain, in his fantasy he possibly could and I am sure there was a lot of rhythmic movement going on while he watched various OWK videos where guys were whipped and possibly convinced himself he would be able to endure it, just when he felt actual pain, he simply couldn't take it.


What, like river dancing, maybe?

Strange that the disconnect between fantasy and reality was *that* big, though. We're talking yawning chasm, here.

_____________________________

http://www.domme-chronicles.com


(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Where do i pay for fantasy - 5/25/2011 7:47:43 AM   
TheAmazinSub


Posts: 4
Joined: 5/25/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze


quote:

ORIGINAL: TheAmazinSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

Oh and bear in mind, while something might look very hot in a video, the actual sensations might not be to your liking at all, you might find out the hard way that you are not a masochist...

I mean, it turns me on just thinking about it. For years i ALWAYS fantasize about it. I may not be a hardcore one, but i know i'm one, even if it's just light..I'll find out when i go.


Thanks for the replies so far =)


Well, a few years ago when I was a pro domme, a guy came to me and wanted a brutal harsh whipping, OWK style, no warm up, told him I won't do it without warm up, dangers and all and nope, not a bullwhip, single tail... Asked him about the experience he had and he mentioned quite a lot of crops, paddles and whips, sounded believable, so I warmed him up and he started screaming and yelling like crazy, I thought he hasn't safeworded and it's part of his game (some people get off on that) mind you at that point it was still just a spanking with my bare hands. He was trashing and yelling so much, that I thought I risk "breaking the mood", especially since he yelled that he had "forgotten this freaking word that makes you stop", turns out he couldn't take even a spanking. I sat him down, reminded him of the "experience" he claimed, and he told me that he did watch those videos so often....

It wasn't a nice experience for him, so just be honest and let them guide you, they do have more experience and can lead you in another direction in case one thing doesn't work out as it did in your fantasy...


Hmm, by trashing do you mean crying? Just curious, I can't remember hearing that word before besides trash talking.

I got a question, did alot of the people end up not enjoying their first time with you? This is something i must experience, i just hope i don't regret it. If i do, i'll at least not act like that guy from your story..


(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Where do i pay for fantasy - 5/25/2011 8:02:19 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline 		No by thrashing I mean flapping, flailing around like I stuck his fingers into an electric socket, trying to break out of his restrains (sorry, missed an H but maybe you are familiar with the expression thrashing around like a fish on shore - you get the idea) and yes, screaming and crying...

This guy was an exception, usually people who were new came and said so, you sit down with them and you try to find out what they are trying to achieve, you tell them what to expect, you also mention that some things might be quite different in real life and actually experiencing them than they were in their fantasies. The more honest somebody is, the better it turns out usually, you know if somebody claims that he has experience in something and then he doesn't, you do wonder a bit, you also wonder a bit if he was honest about his medical issues and you are more distrustful of everything he said, which doe have an effect of how you interact.

My advise would be, you do tell her that you always wanted to experience it, and let her run with it.

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to TheAmazinSub)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Where do i pay for fantasy - 5/25/2011 8:05:41 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer


Strange that the disconnect between fantasy and reality was *that* big, though. We're talking yawning chasm, here.


Not really, you know quite a lot of people fantasize about something and they aren't prepared for the reality. I mean just think about the ever popular "I wanna live in your cellar for the rest of my life, chained and beaten, tortured..." I do wonder how they would feel being chained there for 2 days with a bucket as a toilet and ignored because I might not be in the mood to torture them... Or guys who fantasize about "toilet service" because fantasies just don't smell...

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to PeonForHer)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Where do i pay for fantasy - 5/25/2011 8:20:32 AM   
OttersSwim


Posts: 2860
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline 		OP, I would agree with being honest.  Look, if you find yourself tied up there and she is not hitting you hard enough...you can easily ask her to hit harder.  Frankly, for a first time visit, she is likely to start slow and light and see how you do - it takes nothing to "ramp it up" if you are doing okay with it, but a couple of strikes harder than you are prepared for will entirely color if not ruin your experience.

Be straight up honest with her, and when you get up there, actually feel what is happening to you - it is not a macho contest to "endure".  It is something to "ride", fully experience, and hopefully enjoy.  There is no shame in crying out, in tears, or admitting that you have a pain tolerance. 

Especially your first time.  You are paying to have an experience.  Don't let your bravado get in the way of your actually experiencing it.

< Message edited by OttersSwim -- 5/25/2011 8:21:01 AM >

_____________________________

I am on a journey of authenticity and self.

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> Where do i pay for fantasy Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.109