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RE: The Platinum Unicorn that shits Golden Eggs.... - 6/6/2011 4:49:00 AM   
BonesFromAsh


Posts: 1362
Joined: 6/17/2010
Status: offline 		~fast reply to everyone!~

A big thank you to those who respnded to this rather unusually titled question.

This question, in some ways, was personal in nature for me...in others, it relates to some of the people I dealt with at work (a place where I often see people living with the consequences on their choices...not in a positive sense).
I hear how people gave up on their ideal dream and settled or accepted their reality. I'm called an idealist (albeit tempered with a good dose of reality)...a label I'm quite happy to use...and yet I've begun to re-examine some of my own Platinum Unicorns to check for viability.

I didn't want to make this personal...and stiill doesn't have to be....but there you have it. I was simply curious to read others thoughts. Thank you.


(in reply to Whiplashsmile4)
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RE: The Platinum Unicorn that shits Golden Eggs.... - 6/6/2011 4:55:58 AM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BonesFromAsh

Here's a topic I haven't come across lately whilst perusing the old threads....the elusive Platinum Unicorn.

When you realize what you seek most likely doesn't exist....how do you chose to respond?

Do you change your criteria?

Do you put your wishes on the back burner?

Do you just give up...or do you do something in between these?



*Note....credit given to sunshinemiss for the "that shits Golden Eggs" part. She's great like that!

ETA...Unicorn does not imply a poly situation. Unicorn means an legendary creature...as in possible myth.


I had this experience. I didn't think that the kind of relationship I wanted and needed to feel happy and fulfilled could be possible based on the people I was meeting and talking to.
I had resigned myself to the fact that I would wait until I met someone that came close. Close was better than nothing at all.
And then I got an email....and learned that I didn't have to compromise a single thing.
He is everything I ever wanted and fantasized about and more. I am able to be who I am and so is he.
It keeps getting better and better each day. I am a very lucky woman.

Edited to add....this flows over into all other aspects of my life too.
I am a better mom because of him. I'm pursuing a job that I love because of his support.
I've learned not to settle.

< Message edited by Aileen1968 -- 6/6/2011 4:57:49 AM >

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RE: The Platinum Unicorn that shits Golden Eggs.... - 6/6/2011 5:58:30 AM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968
I've learned not to settle.


Amen.
Life is short. You only get to live it once.
Why freaking compromise? I don't like skim milk, I don't like watered down drinks, I don't do imitation chocolate and I don't sell myself short.



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RE: The Platinum Unicorn that shits Golden Eggs.... - 6/6/2011 7:48:52 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		I don't believe in unicorns, I prefer to enjoy my real, live, horses. Which at one point in my life, was as unrealistic a dream as a unicorn would be now.

I don't much care for eggs, but I've got more gold than I ever would have imagined at one time.

I don't day dream about much of anything. I prefer to focus on what is right in front of me, attainable in the moment. Doing the best I can with what I've got. That gained me the horses and gold.

Relationships.....I have had moments of pure bliss. More than many people have had in a life time. If a woman comes a long that fits into my life..........fabulous. But I am not going to work so hard towards that goal that I am ignoring, not living, all the awesomeness I've already got.


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RE: The Platinum Unicorn that shits Golden Eggs.... - 6/6/2011 7:53:37 AM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline 		I realized long ago that life is a sinking, sucking cesspool of darkness and despair, intermittently brightened by brief moments of false hope...

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RE: The Platinum Unicorn that shits Golden Eggs.... - 6/6/2011 8:01:48 AM   
Iamsemisweet


Posts: 3651
Joined: 4/9/2011
From: The Great Northwest, USA
Status: offline 		False hope is better than no hope at all.
I actually became much happier when I accepted that no one gets everything they want. The realization made me appreciate what I already had

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The Cat: Oh, you can't help that. We're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad.
Alice: How do you know I'm mad?
The Cat: You must be. Or you wouldn't have come here.

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RE: The Platinum Unicorn that shits Golden Eggs.... - 6/6/2011 8:29:10 AM   
Madame4a


Posts: 2045
Joined: 2/4/2008
From: Washington, DC area
Status: offline 		I'm going to guess I've never actually "looked" for something... something always seems to find me...if the person fits they do.

I have to admit, I've never understand searching for... a Master, a submissive... a Mistress, a slave or whatever... I feel, just like in vanilla relationships, the best thing is to get on with your life, have fun, do things... GET OUT .. meet people... make friends... and then make sure your friends know you're OPEN.. not searching. I think searching just leads to disappointment.

When I've been single, I've tried hard to enjoy it and revel in the time I had... and not search.. funnily enough, for me... stuff just seems to come up... stuff.. people I should say...particularly the relationship I'm in now.. it completely blindsided me... and I was not searching...

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RE: The Platinum Unicorn that shits Golden Eggs.... - 6/6/2011 8:45:07 AM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig

I realized long ago that life is a sinking, sucking cesspool of darkness and despair, intermittently brightened by brief moments of false hope...



That made me laugh

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RE: The Platinum Unicorn that shits Golden Eggs.... - 6/6/2011 9:41:17 AM   
Nanako


Posts: 222
Joined: 2/7/2011
From: Glasgow, Scotland
Status: offline 		Not sure if I'll ever find my perfect relationship. only partially sure what it even would be.
I guess I put things on the backburner. Until/if it comes along, I'll settle for other people/things, keep my mind occupied, and pursue other dreams that are more feasible. but always keep it in the back of my mind ^_^


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RE: The Platinum Unicorn that shits Golden Eggs.... - 6/6/2011 11:07:28 AM   
NuevaVida


Posts: 6707
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Many years ago I realized I was spending my life planning for the things I wanted, rather than doing the things I wanted. So much unrecoverable time was wasted, but what I learned from it was to live in the present to the fullest while hoping for the future. Some of the dreams I had will never be realized - it's too late. Other things I used to dream for, I no longer want. I learned I can create new dreams and be realistic about past dreams. As my mother often told me, "Dont miss what you never had. Enjoy what you do have."



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RE: The Platinum Unicorn that shits Golden Eggs.... - 6/6/2011 11:07:58 AM   
MasterSlaveLA


Posts: 3991
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Whiplashsmile4

I'm going to shoot myself in the head with the biggest rubber band I can humanly find right now, perhaps it will knock me out for a few weeks.



Just remember to record it and put the video up on YouTube -- it'll have 500,000 hits by the end of the week!!!




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It's only kinky the first time!!!

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RE: The Platinum Unicorn that shits Golden Eggs.... - 6/6/2011 1:05:21 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		I think that Arpig might be my dream date. Do you think he'll get along with Domiguy?

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RE: The Platinum Unicorn that shits Golden Eggs.... - 6/6/2011 2:14:12 PM   
leadership527


Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline 		I don't really conceptualize the problem in this way. I wasn't "seeking" any particular thing when I ran into Carol. Instead, I look at the women that come into contact with and try to see them for who they are and who we might be. I don't measure them up against some theoretical standard. In the past, my notions of "what I seek" have proven to be dramatically incorrect so I abandoned the idea entirely.

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I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

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RE: The Platinum Unicorn that shits Golden Eggs.... - 6/6/2011 6:18:10 PM   
kiwisub12


Posts: 4742
Joined: 1/11/2006
Status: offline 		Sixteen years ago, if you asked me if i thought i would be happy with a man, i would have looked at you as if you were a tree full of owls! I wouldn't have believed you - i couldn't even visualise that a man could be nice enough for me to even associate with, much less trust with my heart - and body.

Now i'm looking at not just one, but two wonderful relationships in the last 6 years. Sometimes when you have your back turned, the unicorn comes up and lies down behind you for you to trip over. And it doesn't necessarily happen overnight either.

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RE: The Platinum Unicorn that shits Golden Eggs.... - 6/6/2011 8:09:02 PM   
windchymes


Posts: 9410
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig

I realized long ago that life is a sinking, sucking cesspool of darkness and despair, intermittently brightened by brief moments of false hope...


I wish you'd stop sugar-coating everything.



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RE: The Platinum Unicorn that shits Golden Eggs.... - 6/6/2011 10:17:00 PM   
Muttling


Posts: 1612
Joined: 9/30/2007
Status: offline 		I'm still looking.   She's elusive and hard to find, but I know she's out there.

The woman I truly connect with in kink and vanilla.   I have many dear friends who I adore, but not the one.

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RE: The Platinum Unicorn that shits Golden Eggs.... - 6/6/2011 10:46:50 PM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig

I realized long ago that life is a sinking, sucking cesspool of darkness and despair, intermittently brightened by brief moments of false hope...


See? This is why we like you, Arpig. You tell it like it is.

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RE: The Platinum Unicorn that shits Golden Eggs.... - 6/7/2011 2:08:06 AM   
Whiplashsmile4


Posts: 2305
Joined: 12/2/2008
Status: offline 		I made a comment earlier about shooting myself in the head with a big rubber band. One of the biggest issues I have with a lot of things is this amazing disconnect people have with Reality and day to day living. My idea of a Platium Unicorn is one that is with me living life in reality. One that's going to do and engage in other activities besides Sex, Kink and S&M. One that will Serve me on other levels. These levels are all ecompassing. Most of the profiles are fixated with the horn of some Unicorn riding right up their own butts (in my opinion).

Yes...beat me, fuck me, use and abuse me master. The other extreme comes off way damn too vanilla for my tastes. Not to mention the ones that appear to be more into the swinging lifestyle. Very seldom to I come upon a profile, that seriously strikes me as somebody sincerely into serving on all levels.

Then all the Kitties, Puppies and Ponies. Seriously, I want a human being. I don't have anything against a little role play, but I don't want to own a kitty, puppy, cow or pony as a 24/7 lifestyle. Not what I want.

Then there's another set of profiles I tend to blow off. It's more like the 50's style housewife ones. The whole man is the head of the household and etc. I'm not looking for a wife.

Then there are the profiles that are S&M overboard, where the focus is upon S&M a bit on par with the Swinger profiles. Oh yes, I'm so totally wanting to own somebody that's only good for S&M play and nothing else. Just gives me the complete warm and fuzzy about that. Mind you S&M play is part of the deal for me.

So many narrow profiles. JFC, I swear I'm looking for what appears to be a Platinum Unicorn of sorts. How hard is it to find a well rounded human being that into a D/s or M/s relationship? One that is somewhat grounded in reality without riding their own fantasy horns up their butts? Back to Kitties, Puppies, Cows, Ponies, Swingers, Painsluts, prisoners, 50's housewifes, Maids, Milk cows, Bimbos, Babies in Diapers and more...

Is finding a Girl that's into being a well rounded full service slave that I can mold, shape and train to my own tastes. One that can serve me in many ways, so damn difficult to find in this landscape maze? Perhaps my idea and expectations of what a true slave is for me, just ain't all that realistic. If was into wanting to own a Cow, a Puppy and long list of shit it would perhaps be easier.

So just what is reality here? Who's the one looking for the Platinum Unicorns that shits Golden Eggs? Me or so many countless others with the things they have up on their profile?

I come across a small hand full of excellent profiles, the rest half ass meet my expectations or wants.

< Message edited by Whiplashsmile4 -- 6/7/2011 2:32:32 AM >

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RE: The Platinum Unicorn that shits Golden Eggs.... - 6/7/2011 8:20:33 AM   
BonesFromAsh


Posts: 1362
Joined: 6/17/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Whiplashsmile4

Perhaps my idea and expectations of what a true slave is for me, just ain't all that realistic.



That's what it all comes down to....realistic expectations/ideals/goals.

I keep coming back to littlewonder's post where she says...

quote:


I guess if I ever felt like it doesn't exist then I would look at maybe how unrealistic my qualifications and expectations are and maybe wonder if I'm trying to sabotage myself or maybe I'm too scared to move on with my life.


Do people choose to set these types of expectations/ideals/goals for anything....relationships (d/s or otherwise)/career goals/life goals...as a way to avoid reality?

Just rambling thoughts I'm having.....

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RE: The Platinum Unicorn that shits Golden Eggs.... - 6/7/2011 9:31:24 AM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline
quote:

When you realize what you seek most likely doesn't exist....how do you chose to respond? Do you change your criteria? Do you put your wishes on the back burner? Do you just give up...or do you do something in between these?


I'm going through this now while I look for an apartment. I'm constantly reevaluating wants vs. needs. What I want exists, just not in my price range or desired locale. So for now, I'm living at Mom's.

(in reply to BonesFromAsh)
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