RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke

RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (Full Version)

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sunshinemiss -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/17/2011 5:36:00 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: HannahLynHeather quote: I just know that negativity breeds negativity and although I have had some real crap happen to me, I try every day to be positive about things. Because the alternative just fucks you up even more. i agree. how the fuck do you keep a positive attitude? I've tried three times to answer this. I"m going for the short version this time. Look for the beauty around you. It is there. Every time you see / think of something ugly.... look for the beauty. sunshine

sunshinemiss -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/17/2011 6:05:31 AM)
Can folks PLEASE start putting who you are quoting? Thanks, sunshine

barelynangel -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/17/2011 6:16:49 AM)
quote: i haven't really thought it through, but i think this fact could be a useful fucking tool. while it may not lessen my distrust, it could help to unfocus it from men. merci beaucoup. i'll try keep this factor in mind. Hannah Lynn, You know, i really do think what people have been trying to tell you is that its not just MEN who are assholes in the world. The concept you are speaking of is so focused on ONE gender that it seems that you think women are all that and a box of chips. It's the complete focus on men negatively that leads people to draw on the fact you hate men and there is a fine line between fear and distrust and hate. You also need to accept the responsibility of your own choices and your own feelings. No one is going to change them for you, you have to change them yourself. If you wait for someone to change them, you are going to be waiting a hell of a long time because no one cares that much. You are only hurting yourself with your anger, and yes hate Hannah. You may want to call it distrust and whatever, but its a fine line. You placed yourself in the situations wherein this stuff festered, the thing is that i have a hard time with is what about what YOU did? How many men made global decisions about women because you used them for money as a prostitute? It does go both ways, you know. Maybe if you start taking responsibility for the possibility your own actions may have caused men to have distrust of women, you can start taking responsibility for your own feelings towards these same type of men. As for the good guys, i agree with Master of Holly -- they won't give you the time of day if what you are posting here is what you expect of them. They don't need to spend their time with a bitter, angry woman who is crass and feeling as if she is somehow entitled to them "showing" her something. Why should they want too? As the Master of Holly commented upon, quote: introduce me to a group of men that i have on good authority to be among the best, give me a really fucking good chance to get to know them, and hopefully keep them in my life. You would not have that chance. A group of men who are among "the best" would not tolerate you nor give you the chance to get to know them. Rest assured the option of "keeping them in your life" would not be a choice available to you. It's a concept of if you want to meet men who will help you change your mind about men, then you need to be a woman they want to be around. Why should they need to put up with your anger, your distrust, and your crassness? It comes down to "who are you?" To them, really Hannah, you aren't anyone. So if you want to get into THEIR inner circle, then you will need to be the type of women they enjoy. Just like these men are the type of men the women in their inner circle enjoy. You aren't entitled to men showing you any different than what you already know. You placed yourself in the situation that showed you the men you know, you worked that situation and maintained the contact and interaction with those type of men -- that is why they kept coming to you. NOW, you have to do the same thing only this time, you place yourself in the situation that will show you the different men, you have to then work that situation and maintain the contact and interaction with those type of men to keep them coming back to you and you to them. You will be sitting there a whole hell of a long time if you maintain that the best of men need to come to you and somehow prove something to you. You are wrong -- the responsibility is yours. IF you want a different caliber of men in your life, then you have to be the woman who these men want in their lives. Does it mean changing who you are -- maybe. But i think it simply may be you lowering your distrust shield a little and not allowing the anger to be the shield around you. There are men out there, men that are very enjoyable and awesome. If you want to meet them and have relationships with them, then understand, its a two way street -- you both have to work at it and not feel you are entitled in someway that they must want to prove to you the difference between them and the men AND situation that helped you build this distrust and anger. It's your responsibility to place yourself in a different situation and a different caliber of men. However, it also means you have to be a woman who chooses the different situation and different caliber of men. That isn't easy to do. The reason i say its not easy to do is because if you look at a woman she tends to always gravitate towards certain type of men or attracts a certain type. If you don't like what it is you are gravitating towards or attracting then you need to change that. Not just sit back and wait for a different type of man to come along. angel PS, Hannah Lynn, you also have to believe you are worthy of these better men. If you don't believe it, no one else will either. I hope you get some counseling and such because some of this anger and distrust you feel could very well be projected from how you feel about yourself, the choices and situations you have made, and that needs to be worked out. If you think you are worth getting to know and such and really believe it -- others will also, including the good guys.

Icarys -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/17/2011 6:17:12 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss Can folks PLEASE start putting who you are quoting? Thanks, sunshine It's down in the right hand corner as well.[:D]

Icarys -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/17/2011 6:23:16 AM)
quote: Why should they need to put up with your anger, your distrust, and your crassness? It comes down to "who are you?" As if the only way "we can prove ourselves" is to trudge through years of shit with the patience of a Saint just so we can get to the yummy center of her tootsie roll self. I'm not big on candy these days like I used to be. Not the kind with a sour outer shell, anyway.

sunshinemiss -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/17/2011 6:30:08 AM)
It's not always Icarys - sometimes it's somebody else, and frankly it's a pain in the neck to go searching for who they are talking to. I'm putting up a post under yours and here is a quote from someone else: quote: Can folks PLEASE start putting who you are quoting How can I know who that is unless I go hunting? See what I mean? sunshine /end of hijack

barelynangel -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/17/2011 6:36:19 AM)
Hi Icarys, exactly. It's like a painting so to speak, if its not really what someone wants -- be it too ugly, too abstract, too portraity, to modern etc, people will walk on by with a cursory glance and if it doesn't appeal to them on the surface, they will walk on until they find a painting they really want to look at, look deeply at and maybe continue gazing on it and deciphering it so much, they actually want to keep it with them. Now, people with other people may be willing to stop and look a little deeper than a cursory glance but the concept is the same and goes both ways. angel

Icarys -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/17/2011 6:37:02 AM)
quote: It's not always Icarys - sometimes it's somebody else I know. Just giving you a small spin. [:D]

Icarys -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/17/2011 6:52:53 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: barelynangel Hi Icarys, exactly. It's like a painting so to speak, if its not really what someone wants -- be it too ugly, too abstract, too portraity, to modern etc, people will walk on by with a cursory glance and if it doesn't appeal to them on the surface, they will walk on until they find a painting they really want to look at, look deeply at and maybe continue gazing on it and deciphering it so much, they actually want to keep it with them. Now, people with other people may be willing to stop and look a little deeper than a cursory glance but the concept is the same and goes both ways. angel Sure, I think we all do that to one degree or another. I can say that I see some good in most people. I don't know her but I'm sure there's good in her as well..I can see it I think but it's not on this thread in the context of it as far as I'm concerned. I think it goes deeper than a painting analogy and compatibility issues. There's art and then there's ART. Based on this thread it would be closer if we threw in a finger painting done in shit and blood. You might find some that would take the time to look at all the kernels and say..Hey I see a beautiful beach in that and some palm trees..look over there..There's a loving couple holding hands and kissing! Not a whole lot of people would be willing to get near it to see if there was beauty to be had. I for one have better vision..and can see just fine from where I am. I know she has good as most people do much like the men in the world. Forgive my crude add-on to the analogy.

RedMagic1 -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/17/2011 7:09:41 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: HannahLynHeather quote: I just know that negativity breeds negativity and although I have had some real crap happen to me, I try every day to be positive about things. Because the alternative just fucks you up even more. i agree. how the fuck do you keep a positive attitude? Wear sandals. Not kidding. Have heather carry your boots and knife in your backpack. Wear cool shoes. After a while you will probably want to take the cool shoes off. That is what the slave with the backpack is for. People talk a lot about how changing attitude changes behavior. Well yeah. But changing behavior changes attitude. That is car more important than many people imagine. Put on a cute top and walk outside. Don't lose eye contact with home. Just enjoy how the breeze feels on you. You can always go back inside and suit up

LillyBoPeep -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/17/2011 7:10:46 AM)
just chiming in to say that barelynangel, masterofholly, and especially Aynne hit the nail on the head for me. i met girls like this in therapy and support groups -- though i will say, for a lot of them they don't "enjoy" being the broken wing, but they are so used to it as their reality, that they aren't exactly looking to change despite saying they are, because at the end of the day change is SCARY. even when i was dealing with my issues (and i'm talking flat out having violent revenge fantasies and hurting people; especially people who seemed "threatening" to me) i was actually pretty scared when i saw myself changing and went through several reversion periods, where i purposefully took on a "don't fuck with me" attitude. it was familiar and that alone made it safe. the process of becoming someone else was more terrifying. but at the same time, if you really want to change something, you have to change it. it isn't up to other people to fix you. you fix yourself. it isn't up to other people to knock on your door and say "hello, i'm one of the best of the best, please come with me and see my world." it's up to you to be someone that those people WANT to be around. because seriously Hannah, they don't want to be around you, anymore than you want to be around the bad guys who used you. you're given this carte blanche to use your "experience and learned prejudices" to say absolutely ATROCIOUS things about people you've never met, to curse and scream, and say "fuck off" to anyone who isn't worshiping you like a little orphan Annie who made it out. you judge people by preconceived notions based off a bunch of assorted 0s and 1s on a computer screen -- well what about you? what impression are we supposed to get of you from the attitude you present us here and in other places around the forums? we have the right to make judgments, too, and you continually tells us that we're wrong about you while posting things in a way that proves us right. on one hand i feel bad for flipping out at you for bashing RF, one of the nicest people i've met here, but on the other hand, i will always defend my friends, especially when people who normally have nothing but good to say about him sit and turn a blind eye to your absolutely horrible posts about him. and of course the dismissive "they just don't get it" attitude that many people are copping is part of the problem -- Hannah herself isn't even the bulk of the problem with this thread, the majority of the problem comes from the non-Hannahs who are using her to justify their own worldview. you don't know that we don't get it, because you don't know us and we haven't written huge threads with a blow-by-blow of our issues. the fact is, a heck of a lot of us DO get it. for all the people who love their statistics so much -- you KNOW the statistics on rape, molestation, incest, and other forms of violence that women experience, so to assume that none of us "get it" when statistically, a TON of us clearly ought to, is just so short-sighted. i said before that i understand and relate to the emotions that make conclusions possible, even if i don't relate to the conclusions. i met girls like you all throughout therapy and like Aynne said, they were just tiresome to be around. "the girl who had it bad" is their definition, and they will preach it to anyone who will listen. i totally understand that; victims often feel that they've NEVER been heard, and so many of them decide to MAKE people hear them. but again, you're not someone the "best of the best" want to be around, and frankly, that's up to you. they absolutely would not tolerate you because they don't invite people like the "you" you've presented us with into their worlds, for good reason. a lot of us HAVE been victimized, traumatized, beaten up, raped, commoditized, disrespected, looked at as disposable, etc etc; Otter said your story made him feel a completely alien terror, but it didn't for me because i know where you're coming from. but believe it or not, there are people who have gone through worse things than you have (Note: i'm NOT saying that to dismiss her experience -- normally i hate that "some people have it worse, so suck it up" logic because someone having it worse doesn't change anything about what you yourself lived, and frankly it can be horrendously dismissive and disrespectful to say to a victim). have you heard any of the horror stories from girls from the Congo and other war-torn areas of Africa? but have you also seen how many of those girls turned around and became successful? they did that not by expecting some entitlement from the world around them to "prove itself" to them, but by taking what they needed to heal from the world and moving forward UNDER THEIR OWN POWER. some of them with physical injuries, fistulas, AIDS, things that will physically hamper them for the rest of their foreseeable futures, and yet they still TRY. Peon asked a pretty good question which was about the point of this thread and how we get to it. because unfortunately it's become a toxic little cycle with "men are bad!" as the final conclusion. And frankly, i don't care what you think of me, you calling someone a "bitch" is like me saying the sky's blue. it really has no weight anymore. and i'm determined to make this my last visit to this thread because it's absolutely going nowhere. One person pops in to try to offer another opinion, another person chimes in with "omgz u sew don't get it," and there's a "fuck you, you fucking fuck, you don't fucking have a fucking clue about the fucking way i've fucking lived," and it repeats itself over again. It's like cancer that won't ever heal because there's too much at stake to LET IT HEAL. You are responsible for your outcome, at the end of the day. You take the lessons you've learned through life and see how you can apply them to where you want to go tomorrow; if something you've learned is a hindrance, you have to get rid of it. And yeah, a lot of that is easier said than done. I don't think anyone's expecting you to pull a 180 tomorrow and be someone else. but frankly, i think it speaks volumes to even start off an "i don't hate men" thread with the phrase "guys suck." GUYS as a general group don't suck, there are some of them who do. but your attitude is that they all suck -- no matter what you say to us about giving people a neutral start with you, you really don't. and sometimes things like this become self-fulfilling prophecies. Anyway, that's the last I have to say. I hope things turn out well for you, but at the end of the day, that's up to you.

RapierFugue -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/17/2011 7:46:57 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LillyBoPeep but at the same time, if you really want to change something, you have to change it. it isn't up to other people to fix you. you fix yourself. it isn't up to other people to knock on your door and say "hello, i'm one of the best of the best, please come with me and see my world." it's up to you to be someone that those people WANT to be around. because seriously Hannah, they don't want to be around you, anymore than you want to be around the bad guys who used you. you're given this carte blanche to use your "experience and learned prejudices" to say absolutely ATROCIOUS things about people you've never met, to curse and scream, and say "fuck off" to anyone who isn't worshiping you like a little orphan Annie who made it out. you judge people by preconceived notions based off a bunch of assorted 0s and 1s on a computer screen -- well what about you? what impression are we supposed to get of you from the attitude you present us here and in other places around the forums? we have the right to make judgments, too, and you continually tells us that we're wrong about you while posting things in a way that proves us right. on one hand i feel bad for flipping out at you for bashing RF, one of the nicest people i've met here, but on the other hand, i will always defend my friends, especially when people who normally have nothing but good to say about him sit and turn a blind eye to your absolutely horrible posts about him. While I'm obviously touched and gratified by the kind words you and another have written (really, thank you both), I have to say I don’t feel abused or especially insulted, because she clearly has some pretty major issues going on. Doesn't make her actions right, but I find it difficult to be angry with those who’re* freaking out, even if part of that freaking out is attention seeking. I seek always to be as fair as I can be, while appreciating that, when I was younger, I too was prone to going right over the top sometimes. Everyone grows up, sooner or later. The only variable is how much damage you do to yourself in the interim. Therapy can help, but the individual has to want to change – no genuine desire to change, no progress. But hey – it’s Friday! The weekend’s here, so let’s all enjoy ourselves and chill the fuck out :) *if ever there was an apostrophe you DON'T want to accidentally leave out, it’s that one – swear to god, I checked it 4 times :)

juliaoceania -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/17/2011 7:55:23 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sexyred1 I don't think anything is going to change here. People have to deal with alot of shit in their lives. Sometimes the shit is of their own making and sometimes they just happen to step into shit. Whether you let it get to you and damage you or just wipe it off your shoe, even though that might not totally remove the bad smell, is up to you. I just know that negativity breeds negativity and although I have had some real crap happen to me, I try every day to be positive about things. Because the alternative just fucks you up even more. Amen to that!

juliaoceania -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/17/2011 8:07:43 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: HannahLynHeather quote: I just know that negativity breeds negativity and although I have had some real crap happen to me, I try every day to be positive about things. Because the alternative just fucks you up even more. i agree. how the fuck do you keep a positive attitude? One thought at a time. At least that is how I have done it, and I am not always successful, but I am much more positive than I was when I was your age. literally had to retrain my brain. I paid attention to how my thoughts made me feel. If I noticed I was feeling angry or sad or bitter or anxious, I paid attention to the thoughts that had generated those feelings. It was not as simple as thinking the opposite thing, sometimes that is impossible. I challenged the negative thoughts. If I had a thought like "You're worthless, Julia", I would turn that around to "There are many people who love me because they say I am kind, generous, intelligent, etc etc etc". If I got depressed thinking about my past, I would remind myself that my past did not define me in the future. I would constantly reach for a better feeling thought. I think sometimes people think positive thinking is bullshit because no one taught them how to do it, and it is a skill. One problem with going from negative thinking patterns to more positive ones is that people expect that they can force positive thoughts, they can't. It is a process. If you tell yourself the opposite of what you are used to thinking, it will feel like a lie, or impossible. I did this in steps. I found that depression was the worst feeling place, and anger was better than depression, and annoyance felt better than anger, and I was constantly reaching for the better feeling and the thoughts I associated with those feelings. In other words, Hannah, I think your anger feels better to you than your depression... , and then you can have good feelings like enthusiasm and joy and passion become your default setting....

LaTigresse -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/17/2011 8:13:38 AM)
Super excellent post Julia.

masterofholly -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/17/2011 8:13:58 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: HeatherMcLeather The part at the end where she makes the point of the whole post, where says she doesn't lump you all together in the same category, where she says she is forgiving and optimistic. Canonization coverage on the evening news? quote: It's not her fault that the men she's dealt with were so overwhelmingly shits. I bet it is her fault, for the most part. A few choices here: 1) She is a hideous judge of character. 2) She expects perfection and deems him a "shit" when he does not measure up and/or kiss her ass. 3) He tells her to take her bullshit and hit the curb, thus earning the "shit" title. 4) She consistently chooses men who are "shits" because that is what she considers all men to be. quote: You guys on the boards should actually be pleased, she considers the overwhelmingly vast majority of you to be in that 2% The thrill of it has me flipping cartwheels. And since I have the feeling you are both the same person I will address this here as well... quote: ORIGINAL: Hannahlyn ...trust me ladies, you sure as fuck do not want to know what your loving husbands, sons, and fathers really think of you. No, young lady, trust ME on this. Your crystal ball needs to go in for an overhaul. You have no right to verbalize how I or any other man feels toward the women in his life. I tell my wife on a daily basis what I think of her and she knows I am sincere with what I say. Do you know why? Do you have the slightest semblance of a clue as to why my wife does not doubt that she is adored, held in the highest level of esteem, and is married to man who would never cheat on her? The answer is because she deserves it. She deserves it because of the type of woman she is. I have no choice but to try to be the best husband to her because she is the best thing that ever happened to me. Heather/Hannah, if you want to be viewed as a good woman by the men in your life, then you have to BE a good woman.

tj444 -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/17/2011 8:47:23 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: masterofholly I tell my wife on a daily basis what I think of her and she knows I am sincere with what I say. Do you know why? Do you have the slightest semblance of a clue as to why my wife does not doubt that she is adored, held in the highest level of esteem, and is married to man who would never cheat on her? The answer is because she deserves it. She deserves it because of the type of woman she is. I have no choice but to try to be the best husband to her because she is the best thing that ever happened to me. What type of woman is she that keeps you from straying? Why is she different from previous women you have been with? I sincerely want to know (but only if you wish to share those reasons).

sexyred1 -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/17/2011 8:53:38 AM)
Not to answer for him, but I think the "type" of woman is the woman he fell in love with. And whatever those qualities that drew him to her, and she to him, are right for their relationship.

VirginPotty -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/17/2011 8:54:18 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LillyBoPeep just chiming in to say that barelynangel, masterofholly, and especially Aynne hit the nail on the head for me. i met girls like this in therapy and support groups -- though i will say, for a lot of them they don't "enjoy" being the broken wing, but they are so used to it as their reality, that they aren't exactly looking to change despite saying they are, because at the end of the day change is SCARY. even when i was dealing with my issues (and i'm talking flat out having violent revenge fantasies and hurting people; especially people who seemed "threatening" to me) i was actually pretty scared when i saw myself changing and went through several reversion periods, where i purposefully took on a "don't fuck with me" attitude. it was familiar and that alone made it safe. the process of becoming someone else was more terrifying. but at the same time, if you really want to change something, you have to change it. it isn't up to other people to fix you. you fix yourself. it isn't up to other people to knock on your door and say "hello, i'm one of the best of the best, please come with me and see my world." it's up to you to be someone that those people WANT to be around. because seriously Hannah, they don't want to be around you, anymore than you want to be around the bad guys who used you. you're given this carte blanche to use your "experience and learned prejudices" to say absolutely ATROCIOUS things about people you've never met, to curse and scream, and say "fuck off" to anyone who isn't worshiping you like a little orphan Annie who made it out. you judge people by preconceived notions based off a bunch of assorted 0s and 1s on a computer screen -- well what about you? what impression are we supposed to get of you from the attitude you present us here and in other places around the forums? we have the right to make judgments, too, and you continually tells us that we're wrong about you while posting things in a way that proves us right. on one hand i feel bad for flipping out at you for bashing RF, one of the nicest people i've met here, but on the other hand, i will always defend my friends, especially when people who normally have nothing but good to say about him sit and turn a blind eye to your absolutely horrible posts about him. and of course the dismissive "they just don't get it" attitude that many people are copping is part of the problem -- Hannah herself isn't even the bulk of the problem with this thread, the majority of the problem comes from the non-Hannahs who are using her to justify their own worldview. you don't know that we don't get it, because you don't know us and we haven't written huge threads with a blow-by-blow of our issues. the fact is, a heck of a lot of us DO get it. for all the people who love their statistics so much -- you KNOW the statistics on rape, molestation, incest, and other forms of violence that women experience, so to assume that none of us "get it" when statistically, a TON of us clearly ought to, is just so short-sighted. i said before that i understand and relate to the emotions that make conclusions possible, even if i don't relate to the conclusions. i met girls like you all throughout therapy and like Aynne said, they were just tiresome to be around. "the girl who had it bad" is their definition, and they will preach it to anyone who will listen. i totally understand that; victims often feel that they've NEVER been heard, and so many of them decide to MAKE people hear them. but again, you're not someone the "best of the best" want to be around, and frankly, that's up to you. they absolutely would not tolerate you because they don't invite people like the "you" you've presented us with into their worlds, for good reason. a lot of us HAVE been victimized, traumatized, beaten up, raped, commoditized, disrespected, looked at as disposable, etc etc; Otter said your story made him feel a completely alien terror, but it didn't for me because i know where you're coming from. but believe it or not, there are people who have gone through worse things than you have (Note: i'm NOT saying that to dismiss her experience -- normally i hate that "some people have it worse, so suck it up" logic because someone having it worse doesn't change anything about what you yourself lived, and frankly it can be horrendously dismissive and disrespectful to say to a victim). have you heard any of the horror stories from girls from the Congo and other war-torn areas of Africa? but have you also seen how many of those girls turned around and became successful? they did that not by expecting some entitlement from the world around them to "prove itself" to them, but by taking what they needed to heal from the world and moving forward UNDER THEIR OWN POWER. some of them with physical injuries, fistulas, AIDS, things that will physically hamper them for the rest of their foreseeable futures, and yet they still TRY. Peon asked a pretty good question which was about the point of this thread and how we get to it. because unfortunately it's become a toxic little cycle with "men are bad!" as the final conclusion. And frankly, i don't care what you think of me, you calling someone a "bitch" is like me saying the sky's blue. it really has no weight anymore. and i'm determined to make this my last visit to this thread because it's absolutely going nowhere. One person pops in to try to offer another opinion, another person chimes in with "omgz u sew don't get it," and there's a "fuck you, you fucking fuck, you don't fucking have a fucking clue about the fucking way i've fucking lived," and it repeats itself over again. It's like cancer that won't ever heal because there's too much at stake to LET IT HEAL. You are responsible for your outcome, at the end of the day. You take the lessons you've learned through life and see how you can apply them to where you want to go tomorrow; if something you've learned is a hindrance, you have to get rid of it. And yeah, a lot of that is easier said than done. I don't think anyone's expecting you to pull a 180 tomorrow and be someone else. but frankly, i think it speaks volumes to even start off an "i don't hate men" thread with the phrase "guys suck." GUYS as a general group don't suck, there are some of them who do. but your attitude is that they all suck -- no matter what you say to us about giving people a neutral start with you, you really don't. and sometimes things like this become self-fulfilling prophecies. Anyway, that's the last I have to say. I hope things turn out well for you, but at the end of the day, that's up to you. This post bears repeating^^^ with my own little addendum.....some folks just enjoy being a victim. There are plenty of people that have been vicimized but they're able to work out their issues their way without hating (or blaming since you said that you don't hate men) 50% of the world's poulation.

Icarys -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/17/2011 8:54:19 AM)
I don't know about him but I don't cheat because I think it's wrong to do so. It has nothing to do with the woman I'm with at any time. If I'm not happy in a relationship I voice my dislikes..if they aren't addressed in a manner that's satisfactory, she then leaves.

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