RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke

RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (Full Version)

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BitaTruble -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/14/2011 3:19:44 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: HeatherMcLeather She's probably going to be rally pissed off at me for revealing all this very personal stuff, and I'm pretty sure I'll pay for it, but I don't care. I hope you don't get into truble because you really did nothing more than reiterate what she has already said herself. OP - You are willing to give individuals a chance not to be total fucking twatwaffles. Hope for the best, prepare for the worst. Usually pretty good advice to follow but perhaps not seen for what it is because of the sheer quantity and verbiage of your OP. You've got Heather and from what I've read from her, her style and grace.. her fierce loyalty to you, she rocks so you ain't doing so bad.. and that's good.

BitaTruble -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/14/2011 3:28:37 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: YSG You cannot honestly say that a man has a "fair chance" at being one of the 2%. That is slanted and sideways thinking. That means she expects 98% of the men she meets to be complete scumbags. If she really is having that "fight or flight" feeling whenever she speaks to a man, she needs to get into counseling, ASAP. Geoff.. life ain't fair, sweetie. You were supposed to learn that on the black top in middle school. Given Hannah's background, if she didn't have that fight or flight feeling, I would suspect she has a screw or two loose and, perhaps could use some therapy but most of us who have been through a ringer or two put up walls for defense, not offense and the failure to do that after having the lesson pounded into you so many times by so many different men would be foolish at best and dangerous at worst. She has exposed her vulnerability to Heather.. that's good enough. She doesn't need to show the rest of the world, nor apologize to the rest of the world for protecting herself. None of us do.

Aynne88 -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/14/2011 3:30:26 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Icarys quote: Hannah, it didn't zip over my head and you didn't need to be snatty either. No shit men that go to whores treat them differently as a matter of fucking fact John and I have used the services of a very hot escort on more than one occasion, but it was fun, and hot and sexy and umm she made a ton of money, did some partying with us, and left with a fat tip. Whenever she is in town she calls and we hang out. I'm sure you've noticed that prostitutes were brought up and looked down on while most everyone has skipped over the fact that she uses men with seemingly little regard to them as a human being. Meh, I see what I see but she doesn't affect me is my motto. Icarys, I did, past tense, and absolutely, but you are incorrect on one thing, I don't are nor did I put down that she was a prostitute at all, what I took umbrage with was and is her scathing criticism of men. I find it to be almost opposite. Also, a whore is a whore I suppose, but getting a 45k vehicle or expensive jewelry as opposed to getting 100 bucks and a beating for a blowjob, well....I guess I'm just a better negotiator. Who knows, maybe because I sought out sugar daddies back then and had one on one relationships where they spoiled the fuck out of me made me not be hateful to men, like I said, I feel remorse for it at times, but these were successful men that owned businesses, had college educations, etc. They were just as much in the game as me. I never once criticized anyone for being a sex worker, and I wouldn't since I don't find anything to criticize about it. I do however think if you choose a profession like hooking, stripping or anything else where your trade pussy for cash, don't whine about how badly men treat you after. Pretty woman was a movie if I recall. Hannah/Heather....I totally get what you are saying and I don't disagree with it at all, I do disagree that all men are assholes because you have lived a life associating with guys that buy women like commodities. Of course you are only going to be meeting the lowest common form of them. I doubt the men you meet at a photography class or a class in learning french cooking at the same type of men that want a blowjob in their car. My customers in the bar, the less savory ones that is, are NOT men I would hang out with in real life. It's hypocrisy I know but the men that women meet in strip clubs are usually not the ones they date, take out, and treat with respect. And let's not forget the men that don't go to strip clubs ever. I tried for years to drag my ex-husband to those kind of places and to get him to try a threesome, nope, not gonna happen. So, yeah, there are plenty of good men out there, I hope you get to meet more of them. I mean that.

Icarys -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/14/2011 3:39:17 PM)
quote: Which eliminates most men since they simply dont want to spend the time to prove to me that they are honest and can be trusted, they seem to go find someone easier to get into the sack. Not that this is about you or me..I'll say this. I personally look for someone who handles their baggage with grace. Baggage doesn't bother me until it manifests itself in problematic ways. As in she can't enjoy a night out and let her hair down because she's worried I'm gonna try and fuck her if I hold her hand and tell her I think she's pretty or sweet. I won't jump through hoops, go out of my way or spend ridiculous amounts of time in an effort to prove anything to the person I'm interested in. They will have the ability to see me for who I am as I do them and be open from day one to being in a relationship or they'll miss the point and be passed on. Doesn't mean they have to be open to being in a relationship with me..just ready in general and have their shit together upstairs. Many of us if not all have baggage but it's how we carry it that matters.

PeonForHer -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/14/2011 3:42:20 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: BitaTruble She has exposed her vulnerability to Heather.. that's good enough. She doesn't need to show the rest of the world, nor apologize to the rest of the world for protecting herself. Nope. On the whole I agree. But fear or hatred hurts oneself, as well as the person one hates or fears. I suspect Geoff is well aware of that. It takes a while to get to that realisation, though.

LadyPact -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/14/2011 3:43:31 PM)
Fast reply. Explaining why there are good reasons to hate males, doesn't mean that you don't have an underlying hatred for them. It just means that, to your mind, you have an excuse.

RedMagic1 -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/14/2011 3:44:22 PM)
Hannah Lynn: that was a powerful read. Thank you. It is a mistake to expect greater understanding and acceptance by revealing tragedy. Those who accept you would have accepted you anyway. I find that tragedy and struggle is most useful when it is a tool to help other people. Someone else is facing a terrible situation. I can say something about me, or someone I have known. On another site, just yesterday, I told a story about a woman I loved who had turned to prostitution at the age of seventeen. I didn't tell the story because I wanted something. I told the story because I thought other people needed to hear it. Turn those experiences into a tool for good. Use them to heal others.

Aynne88 -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/14/2011 3:45:40 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact Fast reply. Explaining why there are good reasons to hate males, doesn't mean that you don't have an underlying hatred for them. It just means that, to your mind, you have an excuse. Rocks out the perfect answer succinctly once again. Nail on the head. [:)].

tj444 -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/14/2011 3:47:50 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Icarys I won't jump through hoops, go out of my way or spend ridiculous amounts of time in an effort to prove anything to the person I'm interested in. Well, lets put it this way... if a guy's goal is to get me into the sack by the third date, it aint gonna happen! Most people put up a front, they try to present themselves as they think someone wants them to be. For me, there needs to be enough time and interaction for me to know the real person beneath the facade.

Icarys -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/14/2011 3:49:05 PM)
quote: Also, a whore is a whore I suppose I wasn't saying anything about you putting down prostitutes. Yes a whore is a whore..one thing though on that whole issue. Could anyone really expect to get Mr. Right when dealing with so many right now's? I wouldn't expect to go to a corner to buy crack and find the nicest dealer the earth has ever known. We make our beds in life and then cry about it being messed up when we bought the sheets, the mattress and made a living from it then tried to have a good nights sleep after it with the "one's we love". Did she really think she was gonna meet and upstanding wonderful top-shelf sorts when you're looking on the floor. She was after money, they sex..both used one another and I'm sure didn't have much respect for the other person in that situation. Hell she still uses men and I'm sure it's justified to her because she was treated so badly while trying to grab a buck from a fuck and suck. Anyway you look at it..it just doesn't seem to add up to a positive. know what i mean.

Icarys -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/14/2011 3:50:39 PM)
quote: Most people put up a front, they try to present themselves as they think someone wants them to be. For me, there needs to be enough time and interaction for me to know the real person beneath the facade. Do you think you could tell the difference between the two? Most people would say yes but it isn't true.

LinnaeaBorealis -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/14/2011 3:57:03 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Icarys quote: Most people put up a front, they try to present themselves as they think someone wants them to be. For me, there needs to be enough time and interaction for me to know the real person beneath the facade. Do you think you could tell the difference between the two? Most people would say yes but it isn't true. I agree that it isn't true that you can tell the difference. There are many abused & dead spouses who thought they knew the person they were marrying. After all, they spent X amount of time together, that must mean something, right? There are duplicitous people everywhere. So ya pays yer money & ya takes yer chances, I figure. A couple of times that has worked out so beautifully for me. A couple of times not so well. But I don't profess to know every single time someone is getting over on me.

hlen5 -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/14/2011 3:59:26 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: HeatherMcLeather ................And I wanted you to see a little bit of what I see. To understand one of the many things that I find so very amazing about her Hanners started this thread at my urging, because I wanted you all to understand her better. I'm somewhat regretting doing so now, I am thinking, maybe it wasn't the best idea after all. I have nothing to add to all the opinions on here. Anything I would have posted has been covered. I have to say I am sooooo glad you found each other. "When the student is ready, the teacher appears....." I love your loyalty to her and that she is as fiercely loyal to you. Godspeed to both of you.

BitaTruble -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/14/2011 4:00:56 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact Fast reply. Explaining why there are good reasons to hate males, doesn't mean that you don't have an underlying hatred for them. Nor does it mean you do. The woman is willing to take people as individuals. She wants them to prove worthy of her trust and respect... that doesn't sound like someone who hates to me.. it sounds like someone who hopes.

ChatteParfaitt -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/14/2011 4:02:02 PM)
Ah the duality of human nature! A do-gooder by day and a rapist by night! I admit to being very pro Hannah for a simple reason, she reminds me of me when I was younger. I, too, was used and abused at an early age and had to learn how to toughen up fast. It takes an enormous emotional toll. It may take many more years for Hannah to heal, but you know what? She'll get there. She's a survivor, and I have great admiration for survivors. I have also been accused of being a man hater, back when, like Hannah, I had more than enough reasons to fall into that cliche. But my mistrust of human being is not gender specific. This doesn't mean I can't trust, it just means I'm careful who I trust. Hannah and Heather's relationship says a great deal about who Hannah is, to me. And though I've not talked to both on the phone, it's my most definite conviction that they are not the same person. That is the standard accusation to make when you don't understand how dual natured human beings really are. We're all partly male, partly female, partly good, partly bad, we're all bi to some degree, and we're all switches. Granted, some more than others, and some bury who and what they are and commit the worst kind of lie: when you lie to yourself.

tj444 -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/14/2011 4:06:20 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Icarys quote: Most people put up a front, they try to present themselves as they think someone wants them to be. For me, there needs to be enough time and interaction for me to know the real person beneath the facade. Do you think you could tell the difference between the two? Most people would say yes but it isn't true. Given enough time, I would get a reasonable picture of what someone is really like. It takes time tho, eventually a persons true self does surface imo, for most, unless they are a psychopath. I am reasonably good at reading body language and there are other ways of digging deeper, subtly testing someone, etc. My ex told me once that I never asked a question that I didnt already know the answer to. [:D]

sunshinemiss -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/14/2011 4:12:02 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: HannahLynHeather ..., we're talking hundreds of the fuckers. and not just low lifes, no, i'm talking school teachers, priests, politicians, lawyers, doctors, contractors, all sorts from every walk of life. regular fucking pillars of society. and they are pretty much all the same. up in the respectable world where most of you have lived your whole lives, its hidden. the wonderful, caring, intelligent men in your lives tuck it away until they come downtown and meet me. then they take off the masks they wear for your benefit and show their true colours. where i used to live, down in the gutter so to speak, its out in the fucking open, stripped naked and on display for all to see. the viciousness, the callousness, the infantile sense of entitlement, the ignorance, the insecurities, the fragile over-inflated egos, the manipulativness, the childish vindictiveness, the selfishness, the greed, the savegry and violence, and the sheer unimaginable self-centered, egotistical stupidity verging on outright idiocy. and the lies, the endless web of fucking lies they spin to justify themselves. you wouldn't believe the number of pathetic little overgrown mummy's boys who fucked me and then cried like babies while i held them and soothed them and then beat the shit out of me because i'd seen them like that. and the shit they tell us, men trust whores with their deepest secrets. and trust me ladies, you sure as fuck do not want to know what your loving husbands, sons and fathers really think of you. hannah lynn Hannah Lynn, I've chosen not to read the other responses before posting. I think your words are amazing in their rawness. I think you have some very valid points. You have seen the underbelly of the world, the shadow as Jung would call it, and you have been harmed by it. Not many people see it over an extended period of time. It can have devastating consequences. I've talked a time or two about going to a strip club - the one and only time I ever went. I was shocked by how many "regular guys" were there. I thought it would be seedy and full of low lifes. It wasn't. It did make me wonder what men thought of "real women". For the record, I never thought you were a man-hater so much as you spoke the ugly truth that many of us don't want to acknowledge. I've always respected you for that. Some people just haven't experienced it and are simple unaware. I would remind you, also, that women can be as devious and hateful and disgusting and hurtful as men can be. This is not to negate what you've said so much as to add to it. I wish you only the best, sunshine

tj444 -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/14/2011 4:19:24 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LinnaeaBorealis quote: ORIGINAL: Icarys quote: Most people put up a front, they try to present themselves as they think someone wants them to be. For me, there needs to be enough time and interaction for me to know the real person beneath the facade. Do you think you could tell the difference between the two? Most people would say yes but it isn't true. I agree that it isn't true that you can tell the difference. There are many abused & dead spouses who thought they knew the person they were marrying. After all, they spent X amount of time together, that must mean something, right? There are duplicitous people everywhere. So ya pays yer money & ya takes yer chances, I figure. A couple of times that has worked out so beautifully for me. A couple of times not so well. But I don't profess to know every single time someone is getting over on me. I dont look at a person thru rose colored glasses, I know everyone has good and bad. I simply want to get to know the range of good and bad in them and if the bad part is acceptable to me or not. Perhaps the many abused and dead spouses were not very good at reading their spouse, the signs may very well have been there but they didnt see them, but in many of those cases (not all) it was family and friends that did see those signs...

Icarys -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/14/2011 4:28:47 PM)
Confucius say "You sell pussy for living, you end up paying for it". ~SweetandSourDong

LadyHibiscus -> RE: guys suck, but i'm not a man-hating dyke (6/14/2011 4:29:42 PM)
I like Hannah even more. Hib, who just hopes for that 1%

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