sunshinemiss
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Joined: 11/26/2007
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First, sorry this is so long, but since it is in fact a response to a response, I decided the original quotations were important. I couldn't vasectomize it.
ORIGINAL: Awareness
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ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss
Pot. Kettle, uh AWAREness There's a significant difference between naming yourself after an attribute you prize and giving yourself an appellation that's usually applied to a deity. Even by the standards of discourse in this forum, that is intolerably weak.
I had to think about that. I hadn't even caught the Christian reference until you just pointed it out. I was going with... The king of the Scots kind of thing - lots of "Kings" but only one King of the Kings. Boy, do I feel silly. Ha ha ... ah well. It happens... I did realize though that loads of dudes call themselves "Lord" this and that. I think that's pretty silly too. I understand you are saying you prize awareness. Sadly, I find that when applied to relationships your words show that you are woefully short on it. Just the way I see it. I don't mind giving credit where credit is due, but seriously... your next response shows it.
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ORIGINAL: Awareness
Frankly, who gives a fuck what some sub thinks.
Smart dominants, that's who. Wrong. A dominant defines his own reality - the sub can either fit into that or search elsewhere. A dominant who lets a sub define his reality is a fool.
Nobody said anything about one person defining another's reality. I certainly didn't. In real life relationships, though, a leader of any kind needs to care what the followers think. If s/he doesn't, then s/he's not gonna be a leader for very long (except of course in fear-based relationships). Any smart dominant person who is with a submissive person knows darned well that caring about their partner is a piece of the puzzle. Like it or not, that's how people are.
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ORIGINAL: Awareness]First off, you don't need her fucking validation,
Nor does she need yours. This defensive comment is irrelevant. Focus on the topic Sunny which is his perspective. Tossing in idiocy such as "Nor does she need yours" is an ego-based reaction, nothing more. It is foolish, defensive and unworthy of you.
This was not defensive. It was point and counterpoint. I don't need your validation any more than you need mine. I'm not stamping my foot here, I'm just reminding you of the reality. It's funny. I was just thinking about this today. I have been wearing kind of an odd hat. I like how I feel in it. I like that it's practical and that it reminds me that I'm an American, and it feels good. Now, the people around me (foreigners and Koreans) think I look silly. But I don't really give it much thought. I like it. I'm happy with it. It's practical. And frankly, I have the personality, strength, and chutzpah to pull it off. So I wear it. It's not defensive. It's just good.
His perspective, as you have pointed out, is the topic. Sure. But if he wants to do something that his partner hates, he probably ought to consider that. Glad he likes what he likes and knows it. Hopefully he has a partner that digs it and he's not missing out. Neither is she. Good on 'em. However, relationships of all kinds require compromise. That's just life.
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ORIGINAL: Awareness
second, your life will be greatly enhanced if you ignore 90% of the shit women say - especially in a public forum such as this one.
Depending on the woman, I can't argue that. However, the women on this particular forum - pretty smart cookies. No. The women on this forum predominantly engage in social games and mutual ego-stroking. There is very little in the way of intelligence, awareness or even dominance - with a few notable exceptions. The degree to which they engage in mutual validation is wearying. Its utter transparency to someone like myself makes the whole dog and pony show rather nauseating.
Smart women do exist here, but they tend to be quiet and thoughtful in their consideration of ideas. They do not engage in reactionary hysterics, nor are their reactions founded in ego.
This is fairly subjective. I find them pretty smart generally speaking. You don't. We'll just disagree on this. And yes, there are women who are reactionary and hysterical and their reactions are founded in their egos. So what? That doesn't change their intelligence. (And of course the men are no different).
As to the women not being dominant here. Of course they aren't - neither are the men. We are all equals here giving our opinions. None of us (or at least verrrrrrrrry few of us) are in power dynamic relationships in which d/s issues are part and parcel of posting.
As for awareness, well.... I have found a number of people who teach me a thing or two. I appreciate them. Generally, I focus on those people. That tends to work for me.
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ORIGINAL: Awareness
Most women talk utter bollocks.
And men don't? hell, you all are the ones who were born with the bollocks and cling to them like a baby to a pacifier. Of course we do. However we generally have no problem admitting that, although most of the bollocks we spout occurs when talking to each other. The only time we talk bollocks to a woman is when we're trying to get into her knickers.
Point is, in a public forum - and even in a private one - women tend to be less than honest. They talk about reality as they would like it to be, rather than as it is. Same for themselves. Men of experience know this - deal with enough women, it practically approaches the status of a universal truth.
Actually, I checked the scholarly journals and all I find are: some research says men are slightly more likely to lie, and some research says there is no difference. Please feel free to show me your data. I'd be happy to read it. I use this website: eric.ed.gov which is a scholarly website to find actual research articles. I searched for "honesty" and "gender". Feel free to check my findings.
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ORIGINAL: Awareness
The skill in life is sorting out the women you should pay attention to,
Agreed - it's important to find the people who actually know what they are talking about.
I find it fascinating that the women in this forum spend so much time criticising men individually and as a group but are so manifestly insecure they're unable to cope with any criticism of their gender. I suppose that kind of weakness is to be expected, but it's still somewhat disappointing.
I have no problem with being criticized personally. If I'm screwing up, I expect to be called on the carpet for it. If something is GENERALLY true about my gender (or age or race or profession, etc.) I can definitely hear that with the understanding that there are OF COURSE personal exceptions. That's what "generally speaking" is for. I am not going to criticize Otter or Rapier Fugue or Knight or any other of the men I respect by saying they are X when in reality that is applied to only one or a few persons or even a whole swath of people. I'd rather give people the benefit of showing me their character. If you don't like the concept of individual responsibility that I have utilized here, that's too bad. I'm not changing what I do because you make misogynistic remarks. It seems to me you are trying to humiliate me into agreeing with you. Perhaps I am not reading that right, but it sure is how it looks from over here. Regardless of your motives, I'm not going to agree with you because I know you to be wrong in this instance.
ETA: *by the way, I haven't noticed the women giving you a hard time. I haven't actually read you and the women who you argue with. I've not had the time. I'm not irritated or anything, and I certainly don't want you to feel like I'm joining a group ganging up on you - nothing could be further from the truth. I had a little time this morning, I saw what you wrote, I responded.
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ORIGINAL: Awareness
from the great unthinking herd you should ignore.
even a broken clock is right twice a day. Sometimes it's fun to poke the unthinking (or misunderstanding) doofus goons. I'm amused by the degree to which women here trot out this justification for their lack of control. Fact is, most of the female reactions here aren't based upon amusement, they're based on ego. Insecure women are manifestly unable to cope with a single dissenting view. I've proven that on more than one occasion. And you've just done it again Sunny.
That's bollocks. I have no problem with my ego. I have no problem with a dissenting point of view... as long as there is a basis and reality that backs it up. I could say that water is dry, but there is no reality to back that up. This is pretty much what you've done. You've made a sweeping statement about women that research actually disproves. THAT, I have a problem with. There are certainly areas in my life, just like everybody else, where I don't feel secure. However, I'm pretty darn secure in my intelligence and my level of awareness about people. Some might even call me an expert. On these boards, however, I'm just another person. Agree with me or disagree with me - no problem. But don't come to an argument unarmed or with inaccuracies and try to pass them off as fact.
I'm disappointed. I didn't expect you would join the ranks of insecure harpies. Fortunately, smart, secure women do exist here. They're just a little thin on the ground.
Sorry that you are disappointed, but that's not really my concern. It is, however, my concern that you call me an insecure harpy. I am neither. Your believing it, your saying it, does not make it so. I'm really not going to lose sleep over this. If you aren't able to see the kind of person I am, that says something about you and your ability to interact with a smart, secure, centered woman. (as an aside, I'd like to ask the Mods NOT to remove these posts because of a silly little name calling. I think the conversation itself is worth acknowledging... of course, it's not my decision.)
I have no beef with you Awareness - I find you to be like most people - flawed, misguided at times, sometimes a fount of wisdom and knowledge. This time, I find your words way off the mark.
Best wishes,
sunshine
< Message edited by sunshinemiss -- 6/21/2011 3:33:44 AM >
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Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14
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RE: King of Kings and loves to eat pussy... - 
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