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RE: GPS Tracking - Don't trust, verify - 7/27/2011 7:51:31 AM   
leadership527


Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder
It's called obedience.

And from the other side, I would call it "mastery". Honestly, if it is possible to simply "free herself" then she has not been mastered. The exchange that's going on between them is not dominance and submission as I understand it. At that point it's kinky role play -- top/bottom stuff carried out of the bedroom. But lots and lots of people find a great deal of enjoyment doing exactly that. So what's the problem?

I would say any Dom worth his weight is gonna get tired and increasingly annoyed at having to constantly exert his control over you.
Any dom worth his salt would understand that he is failing to exert any control over her. It's not that he has to exert himself. It's that the control doesn't exist at all. And, assuming she ever agreed to obey, there are also some questions about honor, trustworthiness, strength, integrity, and commitment that I think need to be asked.

After awhile he's going to say  to you "just fucking do as you're told!!" and if you don't I highly doubt most are gonna stick around for very long. Why would he?
Yeah, for me that point would be right at the moment she agreed to obey to start with. I don't really have much patience for "Sure I'll obey when it's convenient."

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to littlewonder)
Profile   Post #: 81
GPS Tracking - Don't trust, verify - 7/27/2011 8:03:35 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Mark your calendars, folks.  Michael and I might actually be close to agreeing on something.  If we're not actually agreeing, we're coming so close that it's actually worthwhile.

One good point.  There is a difference between optional and necessary.  What Michael mentions is a fun game that might be pulled out once in a while.  See, that's Me deciding to toy with someone, when I choose and how I choose.  It's not some flipping requirement.  I shouldn't *have* to keep track of your whereabouts anymore than I should *have* to slap a chastity device on you to make sure that you aren't rubbing one out without permission.  If I *need* something other than your own submission to force control on you, take My word for it.  There are ten guys lined up behind you that are more than willing to do what I say, just because I say so.

When clip tells Me where he will be, I can count on it.  Should I choose to show up, grab him by the throat, and ask him who owns him, I know that "you do, Mistress" is what I get back.  That's what I want and if I can offer an opinion here, that's what most Dominant women want.

If you want things your way, OP, try Burger King.



Edited to correct the damn title, of all things.  Which, obviously, I sucked at because it hasn't changed.  LOL.


< Message edited by LadyPact -- 7/27/2011 8:14:04 AM >

_____________________________

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Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

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Profile   Post #: 82
RE: I Admit It I........ - 7/27/2011 8:56:28 AM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		LadyP, sitting around a pool, sipping beers and talking about kink, we agreed about a lot of things!

You just gave me an idea for a new kink class, lol! My dating resume gives me the clout to teach a class for male submissive on how to De_Porn themselves and go from wanker to wanted!

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 83
RE: GPS Tracking - Don't trust, verify - 7/27/2011 9:02:01 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		My understanding is that electronic monitoring does not tell law enforcement where people are, it simply says if they are within range of the equipment, and the equipment is computer controlled to tell the monitoring when the person should be within range. So you have to be there within half an hour of leaving work or school for example.

There are keys you can put on the underside of a car to track where kids went, but you need to remove it and recharge it once a week. And you can only find out where they were when you plug the key into your computer.

However I thought you could opt to remove the 911 only GPS locator of cell phones, to allow others to find you. Just take her down to her cell phone provider and ask them to reset it. There may be a small fee. They can tell you what software is needed for you to follow the signal on your computer.

However I see a lot of validity in this. Some of us are directionally challenged and would like to know that when we get hopelessly lost, he can ride to our rescue.


< Message edited by DesFIP -- 7/27/2011 9:04:10 AM >

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Profile   Post #: 84
RE: GPS Tracking - Don't trust, verify - 7/27/2011 9:06:40 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline 		There was an experiment with this here, it was pretty effective only somebody brought up the question that if a stalker could get hold of it and use it, it would be disastrous. Must have been a year or so since I read the article, because I looked for it and couldn't find it again.

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 85
RE: I Admit It I........ - 7/27/2011 9:10:19 AM   
PainCompliant


Posts: 57
Joined: 11/15/2006
Status: offline 		What many are saying here makes a lot of sense - for them. I get it. I just know that such a trust based relationship does not work for me. Yes, I have tried it and I have walked away, frustrated. I get no satisfaction from what for me would be role play.  I need the situation to be real - what it is and who I am. I don't want to react how the script says I say should react. I want to react as is my nature, in a situation where there are real consequences.  What I seek is a process - the breaking of my independence into dependence - building to a point where I am controlled by that dependence.  Being reined in.  Being stripped of options. Being corrected when I stray.

This may require a major time and energy commitment by the person taking control. It is not the constant monitoring that some have suggested.  I envision much of the control being passive. If a chain is locked around my ankle and anchored to a locking point, there is no need for constant monitoring. A person can go about his normal life knowing that my movement is restricted to a defined area.  Nor is it never-ending. If the controlling person is skilled, the time and energy commitment decrease as his power over me grows - as I am broken and trained.

Someone referred to my profile statements concerning not turning over assets and maintaining my internet based business.  As to the business, I mentioned that because I believe I should pay my costs. I am not looking to freeload. As to assets - Prudence dictates I would not put myself in a situation where I turn over my assets and a few months or years later I am kicked out the door penniless. I understand the contradiction - keeping my assets means I am not surrendering total control. But many things are not forever or "until death do we part." It doesn't make sense to "trust" someone on that scale in the sort of interaction I seek.

Some have and others certainly will read what I have written and declare "fantasy," implying that what I seek is not possible in reality. What they are actually saying is that it is not possible within their unwavering view of reality.  Can't argue with what someone believes, but don't have to accept their perception as my own.

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
Profile   Post #: 86
RE: I Admit It I........ - 7/27/2011 9:14:05 AM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		shakes head...another person living in a fantasy world who just doesn't get it and refuses to get it.

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Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

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Profile   Post #: 87
RE: I Admit It I........ - 7/27/2011 9:17:46 AM   
PainCompliant


Posts: 57
Joined: 11/15/2006
Status: offline 		Shakes head. Another person who declares something she doesn't get to be just a fantasy.

(in reply to littlewonder)
Profile   Post #: 88
RE: I Admit It I........ - 7/27/2011 9:20:48 AM   
LafayetteLady


Posts: 7683
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Northern New Jersey
Status: offline 		No, my point about you holding your assets and such, is that because you KNOW things may not last forever, if you are totally "broken" and "reigned in," guess what? You no longer will be able to revert back to being an independent human being.

You have been here 5 years and haven't found anyone who wants what you want that you find "suitable." Doesn't that tell you something?

By the way, the reason that such locks are able to be "gotten out of" (for lack of a better phrase) is because of the safety issue. If this master you seek locks you to a chain in a room and leaves, what happens if there is an emergency such as a fire or you having a heart attack? Guess it's ok for you to burn up, or have the paramedics investigate why you were chained to the floor and have your master arrested. Because THAT is the potential reality.

The point is that it isn't all about YOU.

(in reply to PainCompliant)
Profile   Post #: 89
RE: I Admit It I........ - 7/27/2011 9:32:56 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PainCompliant

Shakes head. Another person who declares something she doesn't get to be just a fantasy.



I have a serious question, the GPS tracking would tell her or him where you are, so how does that stop you from just getting another mobile and binning the old one when you have enough? How does that make you more obedient because if you were somewhere else then what if you'd get punished and you don't like the punishment? What would stop you from just walking? How does GPS tracking give somebody more control unless that person is a stalker who wants to show up where you are?

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to PainCompliant)
Profile   Post #: 90
RE: I Admit It I........ - 7/27/2011 9:36:15 AM   
kuppykake


Posts: 125
Joined: 7/22/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LafayetteLady

No, my point about you holding your assets and such, is that because you KNOW things may not last forever, if you are totally "broken" and "reigned in," guess what? You no longer will be able to revert back to being an independent human being.

You have been here 5 years and haven't found anyone who wants what you want that you find "suitable." Doesn't that tell you something?

By the way, the reason that such locks are able to be "gotten out of" (for lack of a better phrase) is because of the safety issue. If this master you seek locks you to a chain in a room and leaves, what happens if there is an emergency such as a fire or you having a heart attack? Guess it's ok for you to burn up, or have the paramedics investigate why you were chained to the floor and have your master arrested. Because THAT is the potential reality.

The point is that it isn't all about YOU.



well stated.  being submissive isn't about being submissive for yourself, but someone else... and in reality, trust is extremely important in any type of relationship.  We're talking about human lives here, slave or not.  Thinking about your desires is completely different from acting them out....once you start acting out your thoughts (which is what fantasies are) you may begin to think differently.  Thinking is easy...taking action isn't so much.  That's why trust is such a big issue.  There's trust and then there's ignorance.  Both are CHOICES. 

(in reply to LafayetteLady)
Profile   Post #: 91
RE: I Admit It I........ - 7/27/2011 9:39:42 AM   
kuppykake


Posts: 125
Joined: 7/22/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze


quote:

ORIGINAL: PainCompliant

Shakes head. Another person who declares something she doesn't get to be just a fantasy.



I have a serious question, the GPS tracking would tell her or him where you are, so how does that stop you from just getting another mobile and binning the old one when you have enough? How does that make you more obedient because if you were somewhere else then what if you'd get punished and you don't like the punishment? What would stop you from just walking? How does GPS tracking give somebody more control unless that person is a stalker who wants to show up where you are?



obedience isn't forced, and true submission isn't involuntary.

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 92
RE: I Admit It I........ - 7/27/2011 9:47:37 AM   
PainCompliant


Posts: 57
Joined: 11/15/2006
Status: offline 		So you're saying that I would be helpless if broken and reined in and then discarded?  I'd submit that humans will rebound, at least to some degree, once the controlling sphere is removed and I'm certain I would do much better if I were not penniless.

"Five years and have not found someone permanent." You know so much, yet so little.  For a long time I was looking for and found intense periods of control for set periods of time.  It is only relatively recently that I have decided to try to take what works for me to 24/7.  And quite candidly, because I am 65 and looking for male to male, it is going to be tougher to find someone. However rather than roleplay at something that is not fulfilling for me, I'll take my chances on connecting with someone looking to impose the level of control I seek.

Unless your house burns down on a regular basis, I accept the risk of being restrained by a chain.  Same with a heart attack. Shit happens. As long as the person with the key and the person being restrained understand and are willing to accept such a risk, it is our decision.  The same informed decision someone makes when engaging in a similar risky situation such as flogging.

The point is, it is about me.  Duh.  I know what I need and will work for me. Maybe I'll find someone. Maybe I won't. But at least I won't be wasting two persons' time by trying to come off as someone I am not just to meet another person's expectations.

(in reply to LafayetteLady)
Profile   Post #: 93
RE: I Admit It I........ - 7/27/2011 9:57:01 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kuppykake


obedience isn't forced, and true submission isn't involuntary.



If you don't mind, I would like to get the OP's take on this.

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to kuppykake)
Profile   Post #: 94
RE: I Admit It I........ - 7/27/2011 10:00:26 AM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PainCompliant

"Five years and have not found someone permanent." You know so much, yet so little.  For a long time I was looking for and found intense periods of control for set periods of time.  It is only relatively recently that I have decided to try to take what works for me to 24/7.  And quite candidly, because I am 65 and looking for male to male, it is going to be tougher to find someone.


Jesus fucking christ, did it ever occur to you that there are reasons you could find it for short periods of time? Hell, I could probably use a male submissive for a short period of time, might even get off on a bit of control, throw in some cuckholding, cleaning and lubing the bitches ass with your tongue knowing you are gay might be fun.

However, again, what is in it for your partner? Controling someone like you desire is work. Fucking someone works up a sweat but there is usually a payoff in the "end" so to speak. I like control, it was hot for me to take my partner to the piercer and her finding out afterwards how I wanted her clit pierced! However, if I had to make every decision, physically spend my time keeping her from begging for cock, she would soon, like you, find herself single, assuming, if like you, that cock she was begging for wasn't mine.

So let me ask you again, what is in it for your partner? Control? The people who most need the control you want are insecure nutjobs not quality dominants.

Take my example of the piercing above. Do you think I hadn't given it a ton of thought? Seriously considered what would work for her? How it would affect her job, her career, her kids? Quality dominants who want long term relationships KEEP those relationships for two reasons, both of which you seem utterly blind to.

Here is another question, have you seen a long term relationship like the one you want, by long term, lets go easy and say something over 4-5 years? Do yourself a favor and read Ask The Man Who Owns Him. Its about a number of gay leather masters in long term 24/7 Master/slave relationships, I actually know two of the couples personally. It might open your eyes a good bit.


(in reply to PainCompliant)
Profile   Post #: 95
RE: I Admit It I........ - 7/27/2011 10:10:03 AM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline 		Pain.. don't sweat it. You came here with a very specific question. You've gotten a lot of good suggestions on how to make it happen. You don't have to justify your kink or style to anyone here. Go out and seek your bliss, dude.. at your age you already know that 'life' is going to teach you the lessons you need. Try to be patient because your pool is probably going to be very small but that doesn't mean it's empty or that once you find what you want that you'll want to keep it.

Best thing.. keep an open mind, adjust as needed and embrace what works. If you don't get there, you don't.. so be happy with who and what you are as you seek who and what you want.

Good luck.



_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to PainCompliant)
Profile   Post #: 96
RE: I Admit It I........ - 7/27/2011 10:16:47 AM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble

Pain.. don't sweat it. You came here with a very specific question. You've gotten a lot of good suggestions on how to make it happen. You don't have to justify your kink or style to anyone here. Go out and seek your bliss, dude.. at your age you already know that 'life' is going to teach you the lessons you need.


Bita? Serious? You know damn well those "lessons" you speak about are going to teach him that what he wants won't work. Or at the very least that looking at what he needs with a broader perspective and opening himself up to expanding his horizons will greatly increase the potential for success.

(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 97
RE: I Admit It I........ - 7/27/2011 10:22:20 AM   
PainCompliant


Posts: 57
Joined: 11/15/2006
Status: offline 		Simply Michael,

Yeah, there are not that many people looking to impose the level of control I seek.  There are some and, I assume, they get off on the power it gives them.  To suggest that those who do are "nutjobs" is the same as someone in the vanilla world asserting that you are a "nut job" for what you seek.

Yes, I have seen such a relationship.  And, back when I was seeking short term experiences, I was offered such a relationship on a few occasions.  At the time I wasn't ready to consider that and we all moved on. I have no interest in the cliche gay s/m relationship. I wouldn't last an hour.

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
Profile   Post #: 98
RE: I Admit It I........ - 7/27/2011 10:39:32 AM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline 		Hopping in late, and most likely waaaaay off topic with the current discussion, I am all for GPS tracking-not cuz I don't trust her, but because I just think the idea is hawthawthawt.
Grins.
Course, when the lilone and I were talking about it last night I did mention that if I chipped her, I'd want to have an electric shock option(like dog collars have) that I could remotely activate from anywhere.
Hehehehehehehehe.
That would be so much fun.



(She, ahem, shockingly felt differently)


_____________________________

"One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die. "
HST

(in reply to PainCompliant)
Profile   Post #: 99
RE: I Admit It I........ - 7/27/2011 10:45:42 AM   
Hillwilliam


Posts: 19394
Joined: 8/27/2008
Status: offline 		It might be fun Kana but it also might be dangerous. If she was driving?

_____________________________

Kinkier than a cheap garden hose.

Whoever said "Religion is the opiate of the masses" never heard Right Wing talk radio.

Don't blame me, I voted for Gary Johnson.

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Profile   Post #: 100
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