RE: Real Life vs Online Slavery

RE: Real Life vs Online Slavery (Full Version)

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NuevaVida -> RE: Real Life vs Online Slavery (8/1/2011 1:35:59 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: poise Many of you are so busy being blinded by labels and policing those that don't fit into them. Screw that. Label me happy. Touche'. I'll join you in that happy label. [:)]

Mayvena -> RE: Real Life vs Online Slavery (8/2/2011 7:18:54 AM)
I haven't read the entire thread (I will, I'm just too sleepy now). However in the beginning there were some opinions, claiming that the online slavery cannot be a substitute for the real thing. I actually do not completely share this opinion. Not always the real thing is possible; and especially in BDSM it takes time for the sub to start trusting his master enough. So I as a Master am willing to give that extra time, not rushing things. Actually I myself would prefer to have a few months of online relationship before the real thing.

Rochsub2009 -> RE: Real Life vs Online Slavery (8/2/2011 11:54:09 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Mayvena Actually I myself would prefer to have a few months of online relationship before the real thing. Is that true even if the potential sub is local to you? I generally assume that people choose on-line because the other person is not local. It never occurred to me that someone might prefer on-line even if the other person lives nearby (unless they're married or in a serious relationship, and are only seeking on-line kink with no intention of ever actually meeting). Would you still prefer a few months of on-line before the real thing if your partner only lived 2 miles away from you? Just curious.

leadership527 -> RE: Real Life vs Online Slavery (8/2/2011 12:19:42 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Rochsub2009 Would you still prefer a few months of on-line before the real thing if your partner only lived 2 miles away from you? Just curious. Answering for myself, I'm not sure that I would "prefer" that. But if I had met someone online that I was interested in, I suspect that it would be a bare minimum of two months from the time I determined baseline interest to the time we met. I don't think I'd be preferring anything and if she wanted to meet, I wouldn't prevent it. I think that I would be going at my normal sedate pace when it comes to relationships and just allowing it to develop in the context it started before I really made up my mind about swapping contexts. Of course, I tend to be pretty reactive to the actual reality of the moment. So me predicting how a generic "online interest" might develop bears no resemblance to what might actually happen in any given circumstance. I'd always sworn that I would NEVER, EVER, pick up a woman while I was business travelling -- what a cliche! And then there was Carol....

HannahLynHeather -> RE: Real Life vs Online Slavery (8/2/2011 1:13:18 PM)
quote: I haven't read the entire thread (I will, I'm just too sleepy now). However in the beginning there were some opinions, claiming that the online slavery cannot be a substitute for the real thing. I actually do not completely share this opinion. Not always the real thing is possible; and especially in BDSM it takes time for the sub to start trusting his master enough. So I as a Master am willing to give that extra time, not rushing things. Actually I myself would prefer to have a few months of online relationship before the real thing. i got this crazy fucking idea here. how about you do this. date a while, move on to fucking as well as dating, then start adding in some kink to the dating and fucking, then start adding aspects of d/s to the dating and kinky fucking, then, if everything is all hunky dory at this point you go ahead and go whole hog. it wouldn't really take longer, but fuck me if it wouldn't be a lot more fun than sitting staring at a screen thinking "i wonder if she has fucking halitosis or not?" don't you think you'd like to find the answer to that one as soon as possible?

NuevaVida -> RE: Real Life vs Online Slavery (8/2/2011 2:04:08 PM)
That order wouldn't work for me. I have to feel the D/s part (prior to dating and then during dating) in order to even think about the sex and kink. Sex and kink aren't gonna happen if I don't sense his dominance over me.

Mayvena -> RE: Real Life vs Online Slavery (8/2/2011 3:10:51 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Rochsub2009 quote: ORIGINAL: Mayvena Actually I myself would prefer to have a few months of online relationship before the real thing. Is that true even if the potential sub is local to you? I generally assume that people choose on-line because the other person is not local. It never occurred to me that someone might prefer on-line even if the other person lives nearby (unless they're married or in a serious relationship, and are only seeking on-line kink with no intention of ever actually meeting). Would you still prefer a few months of on-line before the real thing if your partner only lived 2 miles away from you? Just curious. The simple answer is "yes". My last relationship started exactly this way - we met online, talked a lot, but did not meet in person for a couple of months (well, if I have to be exact - ot was a week short than two months), although we lived at a distance of about 5 kilometers. By the time we met, we were both convinced that we wanted to start a relationship in real life. quote: ORIGINAL: HannahLynHeather quote: I haven't read the entire thread (I will, I'm just too sleepy now). However in the beginning there were some opinions, claiming that the online slavery cannot be a substitute for the real thing. I actually do not completely share this opinion. Not always the real thing is possible; and especially in BDSM it takes time for the sub to start trusting his master enough. So I as a Master am willing to give that extra time, not rushing things. Actually I myself would prefer to have a few months of online relationship before the real thing. i got this crazy fucking idea here. how about you do this. date a while, move on to fucking as well as dating, then start adding in some kink to the dating and fucking, then start adding aspects of d/s to the dating and kinky fucking, then, if everything is all hunky dory at this point you go ahead and go whole hog. it wouldn't really take longer, but fuck me if it wouldn't be a lot more fun than sitting staring at a screen thinking "i wonder if she has fucking halitosis or not?" don't you think you'd like to find the answer to that one as soon as possible? Actually this is what usually happens - I've never looked for a sub; I've always looked for a nice person, then transforming her in a sub. Looking for a sub now is a precedent in my life.

LadyPact -> RE: Real Life vs Online Slavery (8/2/2011 3:12:09 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Mayvena I haven't read the entire thread (I will, I'm just too sleepy now). However in the beginning there were some opinions, claiming that the online slavery cannot be a substitute for the real thing. Well, I won't speak for anybody else, but I believe that some are saying that it is only a substitute for the real thing.

Rochsub2009 -> RE: Real Life vs Online Slavery (8/3/2011 8:44:38 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Mayvena quote: ORIGINAL: Rochsub2009 quote: ORIGINAL: Mayvena Actually I myself would prefer to have a few months of online relationship before the real thing. Is that true even if the potential sub is local to you? I generally assume that people choose on-line because the other person is not local. It never occurred to me that someone might prefer on-line even if the other person lives nearby (unless they're married or in a serious relationship, and are only seeking on-line kink with no intention of ever actually meeting). Would you still prefer a few months of on-line before the real thing if your partner only lived 2 miles away from you? Just curious. The simple answer is "yes". My last relationship started exactly this way - we met online, talked a lot, but did not meet in person for a couple of months (well, if I have to be exact - ot was a week short than two months), although we lived at a distance of about 5 kilometers. By the time we met, we were both convinced that we wanted to start a relationship in real life. That's interesting. I've always found that I'm only able to gauge "chemistry" in a face-to-face encounter. So I've always pushed to meet as quickly as possible. I've experienced situations where the on-line communication was good, but the chemistry simply wasn't there when we met face-to-face. Moreover, I've come across people who could play the dominant role well on-line, but when I actually met them face-to-face, they were shy and timid. I'm sure that there are people who could successfully fool me even in a face-to-face meeting. But I can probably sniff out 95% of the bullshitters if given the opportunity to sit down and look in their eyes and have a conversation with them. That's why I would never spend 2 months getting to know someone on-line when they live in the same town as me. I would feel like I was wasting time, when I could simply meet them for coffee and answer most of my questions in a very short period of time. But that's just how I prefer to do things. There are obviously a myriad of different approaches to WIITWD. Your method of getting to know someone differs greatly from mine. But it apparently works for you, so that's all that matters.

HannahLynHeather -> RE: Real Life vs Online Slavery (8/3/2011 9:10:50 AM)
quote: Actually this is what usually happens then where did the 2 months of fucking online first bullshit come from?

thursdays -> RE: Real Life vs Online Slavery (8/3/2011 9:28:56 AM)
oops

HannahLynHeather -> RE: Real Life vs Online Slavery (8/3/2011 11:55:37 AM)
no idea if i agree with you or not, but i fucking LOVE your screen name, and your profile rocks too. hope you find her man. no joke, i really do.

thursdays -> RE: Real Life vs Online Slavery (8/5/2011 5:40:20 AM)
thanks

atticus4 -> RE: Real Life vs Online Slavery (8/5/2011 5:43:28 AM)
I've recently stopped searching for online 'relationships', I find that the excitement rapidly decreases and, what I am actually longing for is that physical connection between two people. Online 'sessions' I have learnt are an actual waste of time for people with a truly dedicated soul.

LadyConstanze -> RE: Real Life vs Online Slavery (8/5/2011 5:54:44 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: atticus4 I've recently stopped searching for online 'relationships', I find that the excitement rapidly decreases and, what I am actually longing for is that physical connection between two people. Online 'sessions' I have learnt are an actual waste of time for people with a truly dedicated soul. Personally I don't find just online a bit strange, a bit "2nd life" if you will, but for some people it's an escape and possibly fulfillment, so if it's right for them, more power to them.

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