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Relyfe Programming. What do you think? - 7/30/2011 3:08:47 PM   
VanillaXIX


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Hello CM,

This is my first posting here (ok my second as I posted on the introduce yourself board) so please be nice if I am getting this a little wrong.

So to the point.

I have seen that a number of Subs/Slaves have expressed an interest into being ‘used’/’trained’ under the influence of Relyfe Programming.

Now when I was finding my feet in the realms of BDSM (oh so many years ago) I was given the advice that:

“You should never play under or with someone under the influence of drink, drugs or mess with hypnotism.”

So in short both you and the person(s) you are playing with should all be Compos mentis at all times or stop play. Please feel free to tell me I am wrong.

I also think that if someone (a Sub/Slave) needs a stimulate (Drug, drink or programming etc.) to allow themselves to experiment, loosen up and/or go past their own mental boundaries then surly they should go to a state-licensed hypnotherapist and/or counselling instead of trusting some guy (Person, sorry ladies), they may or may-not know, to use Relyfe Programming on them (the Sub/Slave), that they (The Dom) probably learnt out of a book that is marketed (in my humble opinion) to men that can’t get laid, and is probably not trained to deal with any of the mental heath issues that might arise from such Programming techniques?
Anyone here remember NLP (and for those who don’t have a look here http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neuro-linguistic_programming) at least they offer person to person training.

I mean have a look at the disclaimer they have on their web-site:

"Notice and Disclaimer - Hypnosis can have an adverse effects on the mental and emotional state of the subject (listener).  In purchasing this CD you do so with the understanding that it is intended for use with subjects who are of sound mental condition and you agree to not use the files clandestinely (that is to say, you agree to notify the listener of the intent of the files prior to asking her to listen to them.  ReadReadBooks.com and the publisher, Blue Deck Press have provided this material for the purposes of entertainment and sexual enjoyment of the listener, and neither Blue Deck Press nor ReadReadBooks.com encourage or promote white slavery or brainwashing of any kind."

(As found on http://www.readreadbooks.com/servlet/the-10/The-Ultimate-Submission-Hypnosis/Detail on the 08-30-2011).

I ask you where is the greater social responsibility it that (I see the legal side and don’t quote the First Amendment at me I did not say they could not print their work).

Anyway I have had my say now it’s over to you.


Yours,

Matt x. 



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RE: Relyfe Programming. What do you think? - 7/30/2011 3:17:16 PM   
leadership527


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My say? "No."

I'm not even about to lookup what "Relyfe programming" is.

Insofar as NLP... I'm not going to try to argue against it. It's too fashionable. But a quick trip to the COLLEGE library and some reading of some ACTUAL SCHOLARLY reviews of it is very enlightening. The mere fact that the site uses the term "brainwashing"... A Singer concept that was debunked... along with her, long ago.. speaks volumes.

Then again, I readily admit that I'm a science guy not a faith guy. Voodoo works too within limits so long as everyone believes.

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

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RE: Relyfe Programming. What do you think? - 7/30/2011 5:43:14 PM   
Muttling


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quote:

ORIGINAL: VanillaXIX

I have seen that a number of Subs/Slaves have expressed an interest into being ‘used’/’trained’ under the influence of Relyfe Programming.





With all due respect, I've been active in the BDSM community for a very long time and active on CM for many years.    However, this is the first that I've never heard of Relyfe Programming and you have a grand total of 3 posts on this forum.  

Give me something worthy of respect and I will give it to you.


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RE: Relyfe Programming. What do you think? - 7/30/2011 6:02:17 PM   
LastThoughts


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Within the lines of "all due respect".

I'm actually quite familiar with relyfe as well as the book you mention in the link.

Keep in mind two things: 1) women often ask for things that roam their mind and 2) it's your job to determine which of those are safe. /lol/

There will always be quite a few people who find messing around with someones line of logic off limits or more strongly - out of bounds.  However, this is no different than watersports, breath play and needles.  One submissives' limits is anothers kink as they say.

Relyfe - AKA erotic hypnosis does work.  I started using it myself a good number of years ago having had a partner with a past written from the pages of DeSade.  She had almost no trust in men (other than myself which seems even more odd), let alone a psychologist.  It works. .  and without going into detail enhancing, or sometimes correcting, the minds licentious natures via the business end of the whip, or the tip of a tongue has little difference.  There are even a good number of self hypnosis mp3's out there for those savvy enough to look.

It's all reprogramming and in all honesty, there are a great many people who enjoy mental bondage.  I myself am one of them.  Again, I would stress that unlike a flesh wound, mental processes do NOT automatically heal themselves.  When you alter mental flavors you are in essence going into the harder side of BDSM / D/s.

Still, not everything broken is meant to destroy.

_LT

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RE: Relyfe Programming. What do you think? - 7/30/2011 6:13:18 PM   
leadership527


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quote:

ORIGINAL: LastThoughts
There will always be quite a few people who find messing around with someones line of logic off limits or more strongly - out of bounds.

Or more strongly, flatly abusive. This is, hands down, the most frequent reason I get accused of being an overbearing, domineering, abusive asshat. The only difference is that with me I just cut to the chase and tell Carol how I want her to think or feel or value things or see the world or whatever. At least for us, we have no need for the pageantry. It's a pretty simple dominance thing.


_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

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RE: Relyfe Programming. What do you think? - 7/30/2011 6:27:45 PM   
VanillaXIX


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Dear Muttling,

Thank you for taking the time to have a look at my posting and then the time to post a comment on it.

I must say with due respect that if this is the as you put it "the first that you have never heard of Relyfe Programming". Then I am not surprised as this has nothing to do with the number of posts I or anyone else for that matter has put up on this or any forum. (NB I have put the link to the distributor’s own web-site in my earlier posting)

I would like to pass this comment to you.
That just because one makes a lot of posting it does not mean that one knows or understands anything only that one have to much time on ones hands to post a lot of nothings. In short it is not the quantity but the quality that counts.

And for those good people who do a lot of well thought out and meaningful postings I take my hat off to you and I would not dare dream of including you with the one(s) mentioned in my pervious sentence.

As I have seen a growing number of Subs/Slaves asking for Relyfe Programming, I looked at what was already posted and found non-of these postings asked or answered the question I have put here. So if you have a well thought out and meaningful comment then please have your say.
And with all due respect please think before you type as a silly question I don't mine.
But Flaming, stupidity and ignorance I do not entertain.

Yours,

Matt x.


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RE: Relyfe Programming. What do you think? - 7/30/2011 6:55:53 PM   
HannahLynHeather


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you want my opinion on relyfe programming or "erotic hypnosis"? well here it is.
anybody who fucks with somebody's head that way removes consent and is therefore no longer a dominant, they become an abusive predator. and personally, anybody who tries that shit on anybody i care about will know exactly where jimmy hoffa is, if you get my drift.

you can seriously fuck up a person for life with that shit, its no fucking different in my books than a pimp who gets his whores on crack or horse to keep them in line.
it interests you? then go for it buckwheat, but know that if you do you are a fucking rapist, abuser, and molester of the worst sort.

and that; you horsey bastard, is my well thought out, carefully considered, and meaningful reply.

oh yeah: welcome to the boards.


_____________________________

clique? i don't need no stinking clique!

fuck a duck ~w. disney

My Twitter: http://twitter.com/HannahFuck

i hope you enjoyed the post, and as always my friends....have a nice day

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RE: Relyfe Programming. What do you think? - 7/30/2011 7:10:17 PM   
leadership527


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quote:

ORIGINAL: HannahLynHeather
anybody who fucks with somebody's head that way removes consent and is therefore no longer a dominant, they become an abusive predator.

ROFL... the point I made to Lastthoughts exactly. Foolishly I unhid you because I was curious about your response on this thread. How predictable that your response would be calling me an abusive predator. Carol would find that terribly amusing once she got done being really angry about it.

Conveniently for Carol and I, we don't deal in 'consent' so that's not really a concern. We deal in dominance and submission.


_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to HannahLynHeather)
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RE: Relyfe Programming. What do you think? - 7/30/2011 7:11:44 PM   
VanillaXIX


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Dear HannahLynHeather,

I could not agree with you more as I said in my opening post:

Now when I was finding my feet in the realms of BDSM (oh so many years ago) I was given the advice that:

“You should never play under or with someone under the influence of drink, drugs or mess with hypnotism.”

So I would just like to point out that I am trying to find out why anyone would want to put themselves in such bad spot instead of seeking qualified medical help/intervention.

Yours,

Matt x.



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RE: Relyfe Programming. What do you think? - 7/30/2011 7:26:56 PM   
HeatherMcLeather


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quote:

How predictable that your response would be calling me an abusive predator.
Except for the one small detail that she said nothing of the sort.

She wasn't talking about what you do, she didn't address it in any way. She was talking about using hypnosis.

You say you and Carol don't deal in consent. That sounds very impressive and quite domly, I actually find it romantic and hot, but it is a fiction, and you know it. You know it because you do deal in consent. Carol always has the option to refuse. It may end the relationship, but she has the option. And therefore she consents. You may not like the word, but that really doesn't matter. Every time you tell her to do something, she has a choice of whether to obey or not. If she chooses to obey, she consents.

Assuming this hypnosis is real, then that option is removed. The submissive no longer has the option to refuse. So, as you can see, unless you hypnotize Carol, Hanners wasn't referring to you in even the most oblique manner.

You are a pretty intelligent man, Jeff, but this time you just made yourself look very silly. I for one expected better from you.

This is a weekend for sensible posters to go batty I guess. <le sigh>


< Message edited by HeatherMcLeather -- 7/30/2011 7:29:13 PM >

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RE: Relyfe Programming. What do you think? - 7/30/2011 7:27:34 PM   
LastThoughts


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@Hannah:  I'm pretty surprised to hear you take such a strange stance on this.  I've read a few of your posts while wandering through here. . . normally siding on logic.

Any asshat with the destruction of another human being on his mind armed with a whip, a closet, a knife, a gun or directed mental expression (hypnosis) can do damage.  I'm not sure why you're blaming the bullet and not the person who pulled the trigger?

Fact: every person in the world uses some form of suggestion be it consciously or not.  Even children.  About 10% of all top end firm lawyers have had training in hypnosis and suggestion.

Any idiot can swing a whip till a submissive loses consciousness, at least mental bondage has an IQ requirement.  It just won't make sense to most asshats.  It takes time, patience and understanding of your partner.  And by partner I don't mean the chick you sent one email to and now you're going to meet in the lobby of a nearby hotel.

I'm not going to post again, but I've got my smores - let the flames begin. /lol/

_LT

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RE: Relyfe Programming. What do you think? - 7/30/2011 7:30:23 PM   
leadership527


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quote:

ORIGINAL: VanillaXIX
So I would just like to point out that I am trying to find out why anyone would want to put themselves in such bad spot instead of seeking qualified medical help/intervention.

Simple answer.

Carol and I are fairly hedonistic so the whole "altered mental states" thing just goes with the show for us. We do it because we like it. Carol submits to my dominance of the shit inside her head because I demanded that she do it... simple, neh?

I suspect the fact that it's working out well for her helps a lot to motivate her to continue the effort. Fundamentally, Carol sees me as VERY qualified. If nothing else, she knows that I understand my own limitations and will seek outside assistance at the drop of a hat if it's needed.

You're assuming this is a "bad spot" and for us it is not. She is mine... to mold and shape inside and out as I deem appropriate and necessary... period... end of story. Then again, we're in a TPE relationship and to me, total means... "total".


_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to VanillaXIX)
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RE: Relyfe Programming. What do you think? - 7/30/2011 7:38:09 PM   
HannahLynHeather


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quote:

Hannah:  I'm pretty surprised to hear you take such a strange stance on this.
then you haven't even begun to fucking comprehend me. but then again, you like hypnosis, you like fucking over a person's ability to consent or not, to you its a kink. well, i know what you are.

quote:

About 10% of all top end firm lawyers have had training in hypnosis and suggestion.
and the bard was right, they should be the first fuckers against the wall. lawyers are scum, they are the most visible symptom of what is wrong with this world. the fact <assuming it is a fact> that so many of the best of them do this, is ample evidence that i am right and only the lowest scummiest of scumbags would do it.

enjoy your smores, i hope you choke on them, its more than you deserve.


_____________________________

clique? i don't need no stinking clique!

fuck a duck ~w. disney

My Twitter: http://twitter.com/HannahFuck

i hope you enjoyed the post, and as always my friends....have a nice day

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RE: Relyfe Programming. What do you think? - 7/30/2011 7:40:43 PM   
Aynne88


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Jesus fucking christ. . I agree with Hannah.

Ok in all seriousness, that is just some fucked up shit. I can't even fathom thinking that is ok in any realm. Really.


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As long as people will shed the blood of innocent creatures there can be no peace, no liberty, no harmony between people. Slaughter and justice cannot dwell together.
—Isaac Bashevis Singer, writer and Nobel laureate (1902–1991)



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RE: Relyfe Programming. What do you think? - 7/30/2011 7:53:17 PM   
HannahLynHeather


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ok, that settles it, if aynne and i agree, then we simply have to be on the right fucking track. because she and i can't even agree to disagree.



_____________________________

clique? i don't need no stinking clique!

fuck a duck ~w. disney

My Twitter: http://twitter.com/HannahFuck

i hope you enjoyed the post, and as always my friends....have a nice day

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RE: Relyfe Programming. What do you think? - 7/30/2011 8:02:44 PM   
Aynne88


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Well....I think we just did. Holy apocalypse  

_____________________________

As long as people will shed the blood of innocent creatures there can be no peace, no liberty, no harmony between people. Slaughter and justice cannot dwell together.
—Isaac Bashevis Singer, writer and Nobel laureate (1902–1991)



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RE: Relyfe Programming. What do you think? - 7/30/2011 8:15:34 PM   
BitaTruble


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quote:

ORIGINAL: VanillaXIX

Please feel free to tell me I am wrong.


Okay, you are wrong. "Never" and "should" usually are.

First of all, I am not going to let anyone tell me who, what, where, when, why or how to play. That's up to me. I'm an adult. Tell your minor children what they should do or what they should never do and you'll stand a chance of getting some compliance on the issue.

But, let me take your 'never' scenario at face value and see if I can't find a few exceptions to it.

I'm going to have a couple of beers, then use a sharps marker on my bottom and draw funny faces on her. Afterwards I'm going to laugh like a mad clown and enjoy myself at her expense. She may be humiliated (especially because I can't draw a straight line to save my life) or she may join in the laughter. Doesn't matter.. I'm doing it for my entertainment.. not hers. Okay or not okay?

I'm going to have my bottom drink a couple of beers then do a slow, sensual flogging on her ass with my softest deer skin flogger before we fuck our brains out. Okay or not okay?

Both of us are going to smoke a joint and I'm going to get a mad case of munchies so I order her to the kitchen to get me a bag of Balsamic Sweet Onion potato chips. She is to bring them to me while crawling on all fours with the bag firmly between her teeth. Okay or not okay?

You know, not every form of SM or D/s involves ritual blood letting, dude and not every command requires that much thoughtful consideration.

There is heavy-duty and light-weight alike. There is serious and deadly as well as fun and fluffy.

What do I think? I think I can tell the difference between the two and if I'm not playing with 'you', then you shouldn't worry about it. I draw my lines.. you are free to draw your own .. but don't even attempt to erase mine and redraw them to meet your expectations.

I used to feel quite the opposite and would never, ever have advocated drinking and playing but I've expanded my mind since then because I was wrong. That's due in part because of the time I've lived in Europe. They are miles and miles beyond the America's in terms of BDSM. It's downright prudish here and a completely different mindset then over there.

I gotta say that if you've never played Sharps markers Up at 5 paces after sharing a bottle of wine with your lover.. you really haven't lived. It's just like fencing.. only different.

One last thing.. if you continue to play with your bottom after they are in subspace.. there's not a whole lot of difference between that and playing with someone on drugs.

Just sayin'.






_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


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RE: Relyfe Programming. What do you think? - 7/30/2011 8:26:26 PM   
Awareness


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  I hate to break it to you, shagnuts, but what the fuck do you think 'training' is?

Fundamentally, most conceptual ideas of slave or sub training are pretty much conditioning in action.  And that involves messing with people's heads.  What you're essentially saying is that doing so with techniques which cut to the chase are somehow more immoral than those which don't.

Frogshit.

Now don't get me wrong.  I've no desire to pick up a broken sub with the aim of fixing her.  That's a lot of work for me and it's fraught with peril because this shit is not an exact science.  I leave that to the professionals.  However I have encountered those who were unable to work with professionals because - and this seems rather common - those professionals were completely incapable of establishing the rapport necessary to allow therapeutic intervention to occur.  And I suspect a lot of this has to do with the reality that professionals are on the clock and that fact is hammered home every time they say "time's up".

In those circumstances, I might do what I can to nudge away their aversion to seeking further professional help.

In every interaction between two people, there is always one whose reality is stronger than the other's.  And the stronger reality dominates.  Always.  The degree of difference between influence via conventional means; slave/sub training; and trance-based deep change work is far less than most people realise.

The notion of consent is implicitly tied into the notion of free will.  And there are very clear indicators that suggest that free will is an illusion.  That essentially much of what we do is influenced by DNA, peers, upbringing and the various routines we've incorporated into ourselves through the accumulation of experiences.  There's also evidence to suggest that our reasons for decisions are actually post-decision rationalisations we construct for ourselves AFTER having made the decision.  Which suggests that - to a large degree - our decisions may actually be driven by the unconscious parts of our mind and it's our need for identity which insists that we actually choose.

I'd hate to believe that, but I think to a large extent it could be true.  I think it takes a tremendous effort to wake up from the autopilot state which most people spend their lives in.  I believe conscious decision IS possible, but it requires a high degree of self-awareness and honesty which is rare.

Point is, you're bleating about the removal of consent.  I'm saying consent is nebulous anyway and it's not the technique which matters, it's the intent.  If a sub expresses a desire to change in a particular way but feels powerless to do so, is it abusive if I use what I know to enforce that change at a deep level?

There's a rather large difference between creating a physiological dependency via drugs and using trance states/hypnosis.  The drug addiction is about control.  Explicitly.  Trance states are a means to make many things happen - and yes, it's possible to create associations which increase control, but that's a personality issue, not a technique issue.

When a sub is dropped deep into subspace, consent becomes something of a non-issue, doesn't it?  Do you have a distaste for subspace because the sub has no self-determination in that state?  Or is it okay that the state is only temporary?  Wouldn't such a stance seem a tad hypocritical?

I have no stake in this, because what you believe really isn't my concern.   It's just apparent to me that you haven't thought this through and your reaction is an emotive one, not a logical one.


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RE: Relyfe Programming. What do you think? - 7/30/2011 8:31:51 PM   
HannahLynHeather


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as usual sheep shagger, you're wrong. i have thought this through. as long as the ability to refuse exists, then its all fucking cool. but the moment you remove that, when consent is removed from the picture, then yes you are no longer doing d/s, you are doing abuse.

the sub must always retain that ability, the ability to say "fuck this shit" and walk away.


_____________________________

clique? i don't need no stinking clique!

fuck a duck ~w. disney

My Twitter: http://twitter.com/HannahFuck

i hope you enjoyed the post, and as always my friends....have a nice day

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RE: Relyfe Programming. What do you think? - 7/30/2011 8:37:12 PM   
Awareness


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A)  Tell me how they do that in subspace.
B)  The simplest method of bypassing consent is to make your sub fall in love with you.

Think again.  You missed some.

_____________________________

Ever notice how fucking annoying most signatures are? - Yes, I do appreciate the irony.

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