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[Poll]

prostitution/integrity poll


prostitute = no integrity
  14% (13)
no corelation
  85% (76)


Total Votes : 89
(last vote on : 10/8/2012 7:45:41 PM)
(Poll will run till: -- )
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RE: prostitution/integrity poll - 8/19/2011 10:47:14 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Icarys
Ya know...my sense of humor has me wanting to say something here. :)

Anyway to the rest. I enjoy baking and such but you won't find me serving you anything. People at my house fend for themselves. Besides, You'd probably get TOO MUCH enjoyment out of it and therefore, will not receive it from me.

So put your own dab of ice-cream on your own piece of blueberry pie. The plate and fork are in the cabinet and the pie/ice-cream are in the fridge.


Sounds like it works pretty much the same as it does in My house.  First time, you're a guest.  After that, you know where the stuff is in the kitchen.  I'm old fashioned and if you're in My house, you know where the food is kept.  If you're hungry..... Eat.  Pretty simple, huh?
quote:

ORIGINAL: Icarys
I was homeless when I was 15, never once did I think of doing something like that to survive. I realize that situations can very greatly but to go that route to me says low self worth. I did however think of stealing... I didn't do it but I thought of it.

I was young and stupid once, too, but I was 19 at the time.  I always was lucky enough to find odd jobs when I needed them.  A few times, I just lucked out and somebody gave Me a plate or a bed.  Best meal I ever had was in New Hampshire when I was at the end of My rope.  A trucker took Me in, paid for My food, got Me a hotel for the night. I think he might have been the best human being I've ever met.


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RE: prostitution/integrity poll - 8/19/2011 11:22:50 AM   
PeonForHer


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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact
]I was young and stupid once, too, but I was 19 at the time. 



Whereas now you're older, LP.

And that's to your credit!

:-)




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RE: prostitution/integrity poll - 8/19/2011 11:47:24 AM   
mummyman321


Posts: 2102
Joined: 10/31/2005
From: Dusseldorf
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Hillwilliam

I wish someone would explain to me the difference between a woman who gives it up for an hour for $50 and a woman who gives it up for a lifetime for a nice car and clothes and vacations.


Well I hope the answer to this would be simple one word answer LOVE

To the OP:
Personally I see nothing wrong with Prostitution if both parties are in agreement of what is being willingly exchanged. I have known people who used it during tough times, to pay for college, and those who have made a very lucrative living off it. Just as I have no problem with ProDommes charging for a service. Again if both parties agree on what they are getting, I see no issue what that. Actually if the person can make a living out of it, I sorta of have to give them credit. Running your own business is not easy.

I will state a few caveats here. The assumption is the person is willingly doing this and not part of a drug ring, being pimped/abused by another, having a gambling problem etc.

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RE: prostitution/integrity poll - 8/19/2011 1:49:37 PM   
Hillwilliam


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quote:

ORIGINAL: mummyman321


quote:

ORIGINAL: Hillwilliam

I wish someone would explain to me the difference between a woman who gives it up for an hour for $50 and a woman who gives it up for a lifetime for a nice car and clothes and vacations.


Well I hope the answer to this would be simple one word answer LOVE

To the OP:
Personally I see nothing wrong with Prostitution if both parties are in agreement of what is being willingly exchanged. I have known people who used it during tough times, to pay for college, and those who have made a very lucrative living off it. Just as I have no problem with ProDommes charging for a service. Again if both parties agree on what they are getting, I see no issue what that. Actually if the person can make a living out of it, I sorta of have to give them credit. Running your own business is not easy.

I will state a few caveats here. The assumption is the person is willingly doing this and not part of a drug ring, being pimped/abused by another, having a gambling problem etc.

What I was talking about was not love. Strictly for the lifestyle, cars and vacations.

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RE: prostitution/integrity poll - 8/19/2011 1:56:12 PM   
gungadin09


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Icarys
As the man hater puts it sorta. That is an intimate thing for me between people and it does mean something when I do it. It means I care enough about the person to share that part of myself with them and that I respect them for it as well.

Sex for money kinda dirties that up on many levels.


Okay, but if You thought that then, You were wiser than most 15-year-olds.

pam

(in reply to Icarys)
Profile   Post #: 225
RE: prostitution/integrity poll - 8/19/2011 2:00:05 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: tj444


quote:

ORIGINAL: Icarys
Sex for money kinda dirties that up on many levels.


going out to a movie and dinner and the guy paying dirties it up, to me in the same way. I never went out for dinner with a guy that wasnt already my boyfriend. I just didnt want to be bought and certainly not so cheaply. lol But if a guy spends money on a girl, at some point he wants to be paid back.. so i dont see the difference.


Really? Huh...I've never once had that happen to me. Maybe because I've gone on so very few dinner dates because I've always been extremely careful about the type of men who I would allow even want to do so with. Now there have been men who bought me a drink in a bar who expected that but of course they expected that...that's what bars are for.

I've always found it endearing and gentlemanly for a man to take me out on a date and buy me dinner. Then again I'm old fashioned and well...I kind of expect it with a gentleman as part of the art of seduction.



< Message edited by littlewonder -- 8/19/2011 2:02:20 PM >

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RE: prostitution/integrity poll - 8/19/2011 2:13:02 PM   
LadyConstanze


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quote:

ORIGINAL: tj444


quote:

ORIGINAL: Icarys
Sex for money kinda dirties that up on many levels.


going out to a movie and dinner and the guy paying dirties it up, to me in the same way. I never went out for dinner with a guy that wasnt already my boyfriend. I just didnt want to be bought and certainly not so cheaply. lol But if a guy spends money on a girl, at some point he wants to be paid back.. so i dont see the difference.


To be honest, I never felt "bought" if a guy pestered me to go out with him to get to know him, and even as a student I would rather pay for the whole bill and live the next month of boiled potatoes than give him the feeling he could "buy" me. If a guy assumes a dinner will buy him my favors, he'd better be Brad Pitt and he would get it anyway, dinner or not.

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Profile   Post #: 227
RE: prostitution/integrity poll - 8/19/2011 2:26:09 PM   
ChatteParfaitt


Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
Status: offline 		Now see I am exactly the opposite. I'll go out to dinner with any male who appears to be a good dinner companion, and yes if he invites me I expect him to pay. But it's dinner, nothing more to me, and I make that so clear up front.

If I said I've been out to dinner with hundreds of men, I don't think it's an understatement. Some I have invited, which means I have paid. There have been a few who have tried to preempt that, but I make arrangements with the wait staff upfront so I pay and then they get a marvelous (and usually well earned) tip.

The only exception to this is with my sub, I invite us out, he pays, but this is a long standing tradition, and he knows what to expect. (Also, he is one of the few males I specifically cook for on occasion.)

I don't see someone paying for my dinner being an act of prostitution, since the chances of me putting out are quite nil.

< Message edited by ChatteParfaitt -- 8/19/2011 2:42:13 PM >

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RE: prostitution/integrity poll - 8/19/2011 2:26:20 PM   
Icarys


Posts: 5757
Status: offline
quote:

Sounds like it works pretty much the same as it does in My house. First time, you're a guest. After that, you know where the stuff is in the kitchen.

That's not what I said in the least.

I said...I'll point you (general) towards the kitchen with an explanation where, that which you want is but you're on your own.

quote:

I was young and stupid once, too, but I was 19 at the time.

Not that I didn't make some dumb moves...but moving out at that age wasn't one of them. I look back with pride on that. it was rough but it also helped to shape me into the independent, can do person I am today. Not much in life I fear to any great degree. I've often put myself in difficult situations for the challenge and the potential learning I would get from it. Yada.


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Profile   Post #: 229
RE: prostitution/integrity poll - 8/19/2011 2:36:22 PM   
gungadin09


Posts: 3232
Joined: 3/19/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Icarys
I was homeless when I was 15, never once did I think of doing something like that to survive.


i'm sure many prostitutes had other options, but is it possible that not all of them did? Or at least not all of them had the good judgement to see that they did?

quote:

ORIGINAL: Icarys
I realize that situations can very greatly but to go that route to me says low self worth. I did however think of stealing... I didn't do it but I thought of it.


Is low self worth the same as low integrity? Is foolishness the same as low integrity?

quote:

ORIGINAL: Icarys
As the man hater puts it sorta. That is an intimate thing for me between people and it does mean something when I do it. It means I care enough about the person to share that part of myself with them and that I respect them for it as well.

Sex for money kinda dirties that up on many levels.


Is it possible that some people see it differently? Not as an expression of intimacy and respect between two people, but as hormones and lubricated nerve endings, a purely physical act that has no greater significance, and therefore isn't "cheapened" by exchanging it for cash?

pam

(in reply to Icarys)
Profile   Post #: 230
RE: prostitution/integrity poll - 8/19/2011 2:49:00 PM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline 		I think it boils down to what a person finds acceptable, and I doubt that gays who are willing to buy find pimply 15 years as attractive as straight guys with a yen for young girls find 15 year old girls.

A woman might be able to switch off from what she sees as a purely physical act in exchange for money, most women wouldn't pay an underage guy money for sex, too many guys offering it for free, so you have an added stigma or barrier there.

Now if a woman decides it is what she wants to do and can do, who am I to tell her what she can or can't do with her body? Wouldn't that be the hyporcritical to the extreme? Call boys who make a living from only female clients are extremely rare, and I would assume stunning in the looks department, skilled lovers, brilliant escorts and conversationalists, most guys don't manage that throughout their whole lives, never mind with 15 when they got raging teenage hormones....

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Profile   Post #: 231
RE: prostitution/integrity poll - 8/19/2011 2:52:55 PM   
Iamsemisweet


Posts: 3651
Joined: 4/9/2011
From: The Great Northwest, USA
Status: offline
quote:


quote:


quote:

ORIGINAL: Hillwilliam

I wish someone would explain to me the difference between a woman who gives it up for an hour for $50 and a woman who gives it up for a lifetime for a nice car and clothes and vacations.


Well I hope the answer to this would be simple one word answer LOVE



What I was talking about was not love. Strictly for the lifestyle, cars and vacations.


Sounds like a good gig.  How do you get it?
Seriously, I think there is usually more to marriages or relationships than just exchanging sex for lifestyle, cars and vacations. Just because a woman (or man) marries well and doesn't have to work doesn't make them remotely like a prostitute, even if they aren't in love with their spouse.  Usually they need to do more to earn the lifestyle, cars and vacations.  Take out the garbage once in a while, for example.  And usually a man (or woman) wealthy enough to provide such things for their spouse will expect a lot more than just sex too. 


< Message edited by Iamsemisweet -- 8/19/2011 2:55:40 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 232
RE: prostitution/integrity poll - 8/19/2011 2:59:26 PM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt

Now see I am exactly the opposite. I'll go out to dinner with any male who appears to be a good dinner companion, and yes if he invites me I expect him to pay. But it's dinner, nothing more to me, and I make that so clear up front.

If I said I've been out to dinner with hundreds of men, I don't think it's an understatement. Some I have invited, which means I have paid. There have been a few who have tried to preempt that, but I make arrangements with the wait staff upfront so I pay and then they get a marvelous (and usually well earned) tip.

The only exception to this is with my sub, I invite us out, he pays, but this is a long standing tradition, and he knows what to expect. (Also, he is one of the few males I specifically cook for on occasion.)

I don't see someone paying for my dinner being an act of prostitution, since the chances of me putting out are quite nil.


To be honest, I do not think we are so opposite in that, I feel the same way and I make it clear in advance that I do not think about "putting out", if I ask somebody out for dinner I don't expect the person to "put out" - I invite them because I enjoy the company and like them. I did pay a few times as a student because of some sense of pride and the guy acting as if I owed him favors, sorry but not for a dinner, no matter how fancy, that's a bit of an insult and I didn't mind living frugally just for paying the bill and flashing the finger without flashing the finger. In case I invite somebody it's just that, pleasure of the company, no hidden agenda and if somebody invites me I expect the same. Seriously, the idea that I "owe" somebody because I took time out to go to dinner with him, that just strikes me as arrogant and deluded. Do I really look like I couldn't afford to feed myself?

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RE: prostitution/integrity poll - 8/19/2011 3:03:08 PM   
tj444


Posts: 7574
Joined: 3/7/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

quote:

ORIGINAL: tj444


quote:

ORIGINAL: Icarys
Sex for money kinda dirties that up on many levels.


going out to a movie and dinner and the guy paying dirties it up, to me in the same way. I never went out for dinner with a guy that wasnt already my boyfriend. I just didnt want to be bought and certainly not so cheaply. lol But if a guy spends money on a girl, at some point he wants to be paid back.. so i dont see the difference.


Really? Huh...I've never once had that happen to me. Maybe because I've gone on so very few dinner dates because I've always been extremely careful about the type of men who I would allow even want to do so with. Now there have been men who bought me a drink in a bar who expected that but of course they expected that...that's what bars are for.

I've always found it endearing and gentlemanly for a man to take me out on a date and buy me dinner. Then again I'm old fashioned and well...I kind of expect it with a gentleman as part of the art of seduction.

That is how i feel with someone i dont know yet. It might partly come from growing up poor and not wanting to "owe" anyone anything.

I never actually had any problem either but that was cuz until I left my ex a few years ago, from 17 until then i was in a relationships with very little down time, and it was my boyfriend that took me out, although i seem to recall most of the time we went dutch.

The guy not paying for anything didnt mean guys didnt try to bed me regardless tho, I just felt a greater right and strength in saying no.

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RE: prostitution/integrity poll - 8/19/2011 3:06:56 PM   
tj444


Posts: 7574
Joined: 3/7/2010
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze
To be honest, I do not think we are so opposite in that, I feel the same way and I make it clear in advance that I do not think about "putting out", if I ask somebody out for dinner I don't expect the person to "put out" - I invite them because I enjoy the company and like them. I did pay a few times as a student because of some sense of pride and the guy acting as if I owed him favors, sorry but not for a dinner, no matter how fancy, that's a bit of an insult and I didn't mind living frugally just for paying the bill and flashing the finger without flashing the finger. In case I invite somebody it's just that, pleasure of the company, no hidden agenda and if somebody invites me I expect the same. Seriously, the idea that I "owe" somebody because I took time out to go to dinner with him, that just strikes me as arrogant and deluded. Do I really look like I couldn't afford to feed myself?

the bit in bold.. did you go into and agree to the date knowing that he was gonna want a return on his investment/dinner or did you find that out later while eating?

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Profile   Post #: 235
RE: prostitution/integrity poll - 8/19/2011 3:07:44 PM   
Icarys


Posts: 5757
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: gungadin09

quote:

ORIGINAL: Icarys
As the man hater puts it sorta. That is an intimate thing for me between people and it does mean something when I do it. It means I care enough about the person to share that part of myself with them and that I respect them for it as well.

Sex for money kinda dirties that up on many levels.


Okay, but if You thought that then, You were wiser than most 15-year-olds.

pam

At 15 it was a mix of hormones and wanting to feel a strong connection. I don't believe I've ever went after a girl with just sex in mind. I can't say especially when I was younger that visual attraction didn't play a more prominent part for me but as I got older but still early on (around my early 20's) and I had watched others, I began to see the troubles associated with sex and dating. People made things complicated. They thought that they were simplifying when in fact they were missing some very important parts that sometimes might not have always shown up right away. I began to formulate stronger ideas about what was more important in life. I began to pay attention to all of the potential "costs" associated with relationships.

Since I have never felt good about people using others for "any reason" (Of course someone will come in and try and get all philosophical about using people..My use of it is based on ill intent) I find sex for money just as bad as I do friends with benefits. There are always costs to anything you do.



< Message edited by Icarys -- 8/19/2011 3:11:14 PM >

_____________________________

submission - the feeling of patient, submissive humbleness - the state of being submissive or compliant; meekness.

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RE: prostitution/integrity poll - 8/19/2011 3:15:07 PM   
tj444


Posts: 7574
Joined: 3/7/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Iamsemisweet

quote:


quote:


quote:

ORIGINAL: Hillwilliam

I wish someone would explain to me the difference between a woman who gives it up for an hour for $50 and a woman who gives it up for a lifetime for a nice car and clothes and vacations.


Well I hope the answer to this would be simple one word answer LOVE



What I was talking about was not love. Strictly for the lifestyle, cars and vacations.


Sounds like a good gig.  How do you get it?
Seriously, I think there is usually more to marriages or relationships than just exchanging sex for lifestyle, cars and vacations. Just because a woman (or man) marries well and doesn't have to work doesn't make them remotely like a prostitute, even if they aren't in love with their spouse.  Usually they need to do more to earn the lifestyle, cars and vacations.  Take out the garbage once in a while, for example.  And usually a man (or woman) wealthy enough to provide such things for their spouse will expect a lot more than just sex too. 

yeah, like wanting kids. I have seen a few ads, on craigslist (I sometimes go there for a laugh), the 40 something guy is successful, house, blah blah blah and he wants a younger woman to marry and have a family with "right now".

Now, imo, that lasts only until she stops having kids and is older, bossy, no longer a size 0, and stops putting out... seriously, how long is a rich guy gonna go without when he knows he can buy a (new) girl with the lifestyle?

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RE: prostitution/integrity poll - 8/19/2011 3:33:38 PM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: tj444


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze
To be honest, I do not think we are so opposite in that, I feel the same way and I make it clear in advance that I do not think about "putting out", if I ask somebody out for dinner I don't expect the person to "put out" - I invite them because I enjoy the company and like them. I did pay a few times as a student because of some sense of pride and the guy acting as if I owed him favors, sorry but not for a dinner, no matter how fancy, that's a bit of an insult and I didn't mind living frugally just for paying the bill and flashing the finger without flashing the finger. In case I invite somebody it's just that, pleasure of the company, no hidden agenda and if somebody invites me I expect the same. Seriously, the idea that I "owe" somebody because I took time out to go to dinner with him, that just strikes me as arrogant and deluded. Do I really look like I couldn't afford to feed myself?

the bit in bold.. did you go into and agree to the date knowing that he was gonna want a return on his investment/dinner or did you find that out later while eating?


Found out during dinner and wasn't going along with it, and rather ate basic food for the rest of the month than let him pay and think he did me that favour, you know kinda "Fuck you, I think you are an arse but I can pay for your dinner and call me a cab now" while knowing it would mean living extremely frugally, maybe it was stupid pride but at the time it felt good and was worth it.

I would not ever go to dinner with anybody if I would think they want a return, not even with my other half, if it feels like I HAVE to pay back in "kind" it's a no go. Other half doesn't mind, he says if I jump him he knows it's not because he took me to dinner. We have this odd relationship, he likes to pay for nights out or dinner, in exchange I just fill up the fridge or the car. I don't think it makes me weaker if a guy pays for dinner, but I want to be clear that dinner is not for "services rendered"

_____________________________

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Those who do and those who don't!

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(in reply to tj444)
Profile   Post #: 238
RE: prostitution/integrity poll - 8/19/2011 3:44:09 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		Oh I dunno. I think I'd still allow a guy to pay even if I thought he wanted something in return. Instead after he paid I'd stand up and say "I have a long day ahead of me tomorrow..gotta get my beauty sleep. Had a great dinner though! Have a great night!" and walk out leaving his mouth gaping lol.

Then again I've done just that just over coffee....probably one of the reasons why I've always met guys for coffee...let them pay for a cup of coffee and then he's only out a couple bucks.



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Profile   Post #: 239
RE: prostitution/integrity poll - 8/19/2011 3:49:41 PM   
tj444


Posts: 7574
Joined: 3/7/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze
Found out during dinner and wasn't going along with it, and rather ate basic food for the rest of the month than let him pay and think he did me that favour, you know kinda "Fuck you, I think you are an arse but I can pay for your dinner and call me a cab now" while knowing it would mean living extremely frugally, maybe it was stupid pride but at the time it felt good and was worth it.

I would not ever go to dinner with anybody if I would think they want a return, not even with my other half, if it feels like I HAVE to pay back in "kind" it's a no go. Other half doesn't mind, he says if I jump him he knows it's not because he took me to dinner. We have this odd relationship, he likes to pay for nights out or dinner, in exchange I just fill up the fridge or the car. I don't think it makes me weaker if a guy pays for dinner, but I want to be clear that dinner is not for "services rendered"

see thats the thing, i didnt want to go to dinner with a guy and find out he expects sex after, I would be ticked off having to sit thru dinner if that was the case, whether i paid for mine or not, I would just be pissed off with the guy and wouldnt enjoy the dinner anyway. So i just avoided those situations entirely.

If i were in a relationship and he wanted to take me for dinner or buy lingerie, its entirely different. And just like with you, i would reciprocate with him in other ways. But no one is keeping score and both of us would be happy, motivations are very different then.... pure..

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Profile   Post #: 240
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