Arpig -> RE: Playing with Sub when your away (9/5/2011 3:50:09 PM)
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She told me her marriage is basically over "there is nothing there for me anyomore", Except financial support, a comfortable home, and a husband who is dedicating himself to providing a home for her and their kids. quote:
She has already decided she wants to get a divorce but wants to get the children raised before doing so. So she has decided that her ease and financial well being is more important that the well being of her children. quote:
It is a difficult situation for her, apparently she has decided the childrens well being is more important to her than her own happiness. I see absolutely no evidence of this whatsoever, in fact just the opposite. She is putting her happiness ahead of her husband's and her kids' well being. And you are placing your happiness ahead of their well being and ahead of hers as well. quote:
I don't know all the details but I assume the household is stable and functional but she has fallen out of love with her husband. Exactly! You don't know the details. And just an FYI....in this context "fallen out of love" actually means "I'm a bored." quote:
I am not stealing her from her husband. You are doing exactly that. quote:
Not an ideal situation and I'm looking for someone I can have a real connection with to share my newly exposed dominant traits. Assuming that what you have posted on this thread is indeed how you feel, then what you have newly exposed is the antithesis of any "dominant traits". You are so undominant, that you engage in actions you know to be immoral and harmful to your partner purely for the purposes of fulfilling your own tawdry erotic fantasies. A dominant is first and foremost a leader who guides himself and his partner on a path for their mutual betterment. You, on the other hand, are being led down the proverbial garden path. I can't help but wonder if it was painful getting that nose ring installed. quote:
I am not going to be able to see her for almost 3 weeks, it might be a good oppurtunity for me to think about what I am doing and decide if it's worth it. It's not worth it. Period, end of story. quote:
I didn't seek her, she found me. Completely and utterly of no relevance. It takes two to tango...you chose to dance, so it's 100% your fault. Nobody else's. It's called taking responsibility for one's actions, this is another one of those "dominant traits" you wish you had...but don't.quote:
It is wrong and I know it, but it's my problem and my struggle. If you know it is wrong then there can be no struggle, Spike Lee told you the answer to your self-induced "problem" back when you were in college....Do The Right Thing. quote:
Like some of you, I'm not sure staying in a bad marriage is good for the kids. It's not. It is harmful to them, you are deliberately hurting her children. You are enabling a child abuser. quote:
But ending it by finding out she is cheating sure won't be a good outcome. You are correct, it wouldn't be. So stop being part of that cheating. quote:
I really don't want to talk to her about all this, but it's starting to sink in, that is exactly what I need to do. Of course you don't want to talk to her about it, you don't want to lose your weekly fuck. As far as needing to talk to her about it, you're right. Here's what you need to say to her: "What we are doing is wrong and I will have no further part of it. I strongly advise you to seek professional marriage counseling. Do not contact me again in any manner. Good bye and good luck." quote:
If I let her know that I don't feel good about what we are doing, I'm pretty sure she will realize she doesn't feel right about what she is doing either. Sure she will.[8|] Oh BTW, email me with your dealer's number, because I want some of what you're smoking...it must be some seriously good shit. quote:
I would like ideas to turn her thoughts to her husband. Good. There is only one way to do this. Tell her what she is doing is wrong and end the relationship. You are in no position, morally, professionally, intellectually, or in any other way imaginable to do anything more for her. Pull a Pilate...wash your hands and walk away. quote:
If I just dump her, she will just find someone else. quote:
It's the excitement of the BDSM games she likes, not me... Correct. She'll just go find her "random dick on the side" elsewhere, you are of no importance to her whatsoever. How does it feel being a dildo...because that's what you are to her. quote:
I know this isn't really my problem, but I got myself involved and I always like to try and fix things. Wonderful. I refer you to the advice of the vast majority of those who have posted on here...say goodbye. That will minimize the damage, and that is the only thing you can do to fix what you have done. That's right...you did it. You and you alone are responsible for this situation. I doubt you will ever be a dominant or much of a man, but at the very least try, rather than being just one more in a long line of pathetic horny little embarrassments to humanity.
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