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Arturas -> RE: 1st visit of my new 24/7 slave (10/18/2011 11:32:55 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Farido
Hi,
After many months of playing with occasional/part-time subs and slave girls, I finally met a slave girl who is flying soon to my place for test leading to 24/7 arrangement. She is in her 20s, we spent a couple of months of long distance relation and now she is ready to fly to my place for a couple of test/training-weeks..... If things go on well she will be collared and will stay with me permanently.
I need the help of the Doms/Dommes, Masters/Mistresses who are experienced with the 24/7 arrangements, with the following question:
How do I treat my new slave during the first 24 to 48 hours to make her feel relaxed and welcome while keeping those lines between the master and his slave well defined.
This is going to be our first face-to-face meeting together and we didn't have the chance to meet outside in person before.
thank you.
You will have some familiarity but not very much since your only contact is online so treat her first as a simply a person without any label or predefined role at first. How long? No pat answer but since she is away from her home territory, make her first feel welcome and secure as women first seeks safety and security and then just relax and let her relax. And treat this more like a blind date rather than a slave job interview, take her to dinnner after picking her up or meeting her or she drives up or whatever, and as you share a meal together, use it to really get to know her before you even start with the master - slave thing, perhaps you might not even like her in person or perhaps you both hit is off well and you begin moving into the dominate role slowly watching her reactions, being yourself. My first face to face is usually in public while dinning and I remember in on instance I tested her by ordering for one and feeding her from my hand as I ate and it went very well as I could sense beforehand it would. Another instance I met her Christmas Eve at Starbucks and we shared coffee and cocoa in front of a warm fireplace and then ended up driving back to the house and put up a tree and shared a warm fireplace there for the evening and into the next day, a memorable Christmas indeed. There were more, but they all follow the tried and true pattern, meet, learn about each other, be comfortable with her and she with you before going further and believe me submissives will signal you clearly and you don't have to wait long for those signals also. About testing, she will test you later as you move into the Master/slave relationship and we learn from experience that one cannot tell if she is testing or resisting so don't try to, instead, when that time comes, take that power from her by informing her of the "save" or "stop" word, up front, letting her know she may stop anything she is uncomfortable with using just the word. I'm not taking about BDSM play safe words but a work she can use you stop anything you do or instruct her to do, and given this, she can no longer test your determination because you have just taken complete control over this necessary phase in developing the relationship cause you can safely ignore her tears and cries of "no" or "stop" or my favorite, "Not here, please oh please don't make me do this!". And it works. And it works everytime. And she ends up appreciating it because it also tells her you know what the hell you are doing.
Ok, this is the way it has worked with me on the first visit with the new 24/7 potential slave. No theory. Just experience. I assume you came here to "ask a Master" to get that. Be real. Be true to yourself and her. Take care of her. Good luck.
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