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Chatting-Slaves - 10/17/2004 6:55:04 PM   
MDdesiree


Posts: 6
Joined: 9/30/2004
Status: offline 		Good Day.

I was wondering, if the subject of : slave's freedom on the Internet, has already been discussed. I made some research for treads, but I could only find subject about Online relationship, but not about the Freedom of a slave on the Internet.

So I am curious, because I find a lot of slaves & sub chatting ( I don't know if this is freely or not ). Are you Masters/Mistresses/Mentors always with Your slave-sub when they chat ? If You live in a seperate houses, do You restrain the Internet-Session that they can have per day ?

I guess my question can also be reverted. There is a lot of Masters/Mistresses/Mentors online...what do You intend to do once You find your slave(s) ? Will You keep on being on the Internet or drop it ? I know that in order to get together, Internet can be usefull ( not 100 % necessary of course ).

Just like any beginings of relationship, You will probably stop chatting for a while, but then the need to get back online comes again for many. How do You cope with that ?

Thank You

desireeMD

------------------------------------
Again, note that my English is not that great when it comes to grammar so if A/anybody needs clarification, I will be more than please to find other words in order to help Y/you.



Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Chatting-Slaves - 10/17/2004 7:13:59 PM   
jillwfsub4blkdom


Posts: 375
Joined: 7/2/2004
Status: offline 		my Dom allows me to chat online. i know the restrictions and expectations He has in regards to it and would never go against them. We aren't currently living together but in separate cities.

jill

_____________________________


"It's the moment that transcends
Our physical into a more spiritual level of understanding" - Musiq

(in reply to MDdesiree)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Chatting-Slaves - 10/17/2004 7:19:41 PM   
EStrict


Posts: 729
Joined: 1/11/2004
Status: offline 		I am well known for not only chatting, but for being outspoken. It is a trait that Master doesn't *tolerate* but rather appreciates. He sought a stong, self confident woman who was totally able to care for herself but admited her deep need to be controlled by a strong self assured man.

I am not one that *plays* online.

I personally feel that a dominant that has trust in his slave would have few issues with her being online. Actually, I will go as far to say that with few exceptions, I have found that the dominants who do worry a lot are showing insecurity in their own ablities to control. Sorta like the married men I know who don't want their wives chatting online because they know they are *looking* and figure she must be too (or vice versa).

Granted, I have been told that he would like me to stop on boards when he feels they are interfering with my ability to get my chores done, or to complete other tasks. But even then he allows me mail with family and friends.

_____________________________

Sandy

Don't take life too seriously, no one gets out alive anyway...

(in reply to MDdesiree)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Chatting-Slaves - 10/17/2004 7:38:27 PM   
belesclave


Posts: 2
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		i am r/l with my Master and i am permitted to chat.He does have certain rules for me while i am online,but i cant chat.
i do know a few sub/slaves r/l that are not permitted to chat online.but in my opinion that is wrong..why shouldn't someone be permitted to chat? is the Dom/me affraid the sub/slave might learn something?
in my opinion its good to chat with O/others and learn more. and see what different things O/others have exsperienced.

bel_esclave

_____________________________

bel_esclave_CJ

http://www.asubmissivesjourney.com

(in reply to EStrict)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Chatting-Slaves - 10/17/2004 8:47:03 PM   
realophelia


Posts: 168
Status: offline 		I don't do a lot of chatting but I do post (here and on bondage). I also do some emailing related to my profile. My Master is okay with this. I don't have any restrictions. He will ask me what I'm up to from time to time but only because I've gotten a little carried away with online in the past.

He spends time online as well. He talks to me, his family, does some surfing, etc. He told me he doesn't talk to any other subs because he doesn't have any interest in doing that. But that's not to say he never will.

We do live in separate houses, btw. So I'm on the honor system.

Take care :)
Ophelia

(in reply to MDdesiree)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Chatting-Slaves - 10/17/2004 8:52:31 PM   
perverseangelic


Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline 		I'm a communication freak and I -love- talking online, especially to other kinky people. It's just something I enjoy.

My partner has certain rules he expects me to follow, but beyond that I am free to do as I see fit online. He has approved the pictures that I share with people, but I have the choice to share a picture or not.

Sometimes he's here and sometimes he's not when I chat. The rules are the same no matter what.

Honestly, I think his rules are great, because they remove some of the stuff I find irritating on the net (ie- I am not allowed to veiw webcams or pictures of people without clothes. I am not allowed to refer to anyone that he has not instructed me to with a title...)

_____________________________

~in the begining it is always dark~

(in reply to realophelia)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Chatting-Slaves - 10/17/2004 9:06:38 PM   
realophelia


Posts: 168
Status: offline 		I just wanted to clarify something in my last post. When I said, no restrictions, I meant he allows me to use my own judgement. I don't cam or chat with other Doms, exchange pictures, etc. Also when I said I got carried away with online in the past I meant in terms of time. Long weekend (but nice) and I'm not being as clear as I should be.

Take care :)
Ophelia

(in reply to perverseangelic)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Chatting-Slaves - 10/17/2004 9:16:31 PM   
EStrict


Posts: 729
Joined: 1/11/2004
Status: offline 		I also wanted to add that I live with my master, but even those I have been involved with in the past always trusted me enough to not try to restrict my online chat. After all, if they can't trust me online, how can they trust me at all?

_____________________________

Sandy

Don't take life too seriously, no one gets out alive anyway...

(in reply to realophelia)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Chatting-Slaves - 10/18/2004 1:02:22 AM   
GoddessDustyGold


Posts: 2822
Joined: 4/11/2004
From: Arizona
Status: offline 		I will just quietly slip in here, if no one minds. As a Mistress I have found that each case needs to be taken individually. If online time is interfering with service to Me, it will be cut back or stopped. I believe in sharing and learning together. But I did have a live-in who is no longer with Me, and he had a bad habit of "cybering" and I even caught him having phone sex one night on My telephone with a phone card I was not aware of. Punishments did not do the trick. He wanted what he wanted, and would sneak to get it if he had to.
Also, at the beginning of a committed and contracted live-in relationship, I do instruct no email from BDSM sites, or I read it. There are those out there (unfortunately) who do not respect the commitment, and can cause some confusion on the part of a new slave who is still learning his Mistress's rules and regs. I monitor.

< Message edited by GoddessDustyGold -- 10/18/2004 1:05:12 AM >

_____________________________

Dusty
They that give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety
B Franklin
Don't blame Me ~ I didn't vote for either of them
The Hidden Kingdom


(in reply to MDdesiree)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Chatting-Slaves - 10/18/2004 5:03:55 AM   
wetrope


Posts: 117
Joined: 8/9/2004
From: GATINEAU, PQ
Status: offline 		I allow my sub to chat quite freely, because she likes to do that. I do not restrict her, do not prevent her, and I do the same. After all it is how we met.
She is required however to report all sexual activity to me, ex. if she talks to a guy and turns him on, if she gets wet, if she plays with herself. If she wants to have coffee with him she must ask first, or if she wants to talk on phone she must ask first. This way I can keep things under control. It does require a lot of trust between us and that is only built in time, but it works. If she does something outside the boundaries then she is punished, sometimes she does that on purpose, oh she is a brat.

_____________________________

Wetrope

(in reply to MDdesiree)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Chatting-Slaves - 10/18/2004 10:32:07 AM   
proudsub


Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline 		This is an issue with me and Hubby. I love chatting with all kinds of people, many from my game site, a few from here, and a lot of my real life friends. Hubby doesn't like it but i do it anyway, guess that makes me a bad subbie. I don't cyber anymore but do chat about sexual things a lot. I enjoy it and learn from it. I have learned to type very quietly when He is in the room LOL. Please no lectures on this, i get enough of that from Him. His biggest worry is that i will give away too much personal informatioin and become vulnerable to identity theft, but i don't think i do that.

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan


(in reply to MDdesiree)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Chatting-Slaves - 10/18/2004 11:02:08 AM   
EStrict


Posts: 729
Joined: 1/11/2004
Status: offline 		Hi Proud,

Is there any chance that somewhere deep down he worries because he knows you submitted online in the past and that is where you first explored? I know you too are very happy, and from things in the past you have written know that it was a hard time. I don't want you to think I'm suggesting he would have reason to worry, just that I know that once a trust is broken, it's hard to totally forget about on all levels.

_____________________________

Sandy

Don't take life too seriously, no one gets out alive anyway...

(in reply to proudsub)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Chatting-Slaves - 10/18/2004 12:23:39 PM   
proudsub


Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline
quote:

Is there any chance that somewhere deep down he worries because he knows you submitted online in the past and that is where you first explored?




It all started way before my affair. About 6 years ago i gave out my phone number to a guy i was just friends with online and he called and left a message that Hubby heard. After that He said no more chatting. I stopped for a few months but almost went crazy because i had made so many online friends in my game site and i didn't want to lose them. He does allow me to chat with real life friends. What He doesn't know is how many real life friends i now have that were originally online friends. LOL I've probably met about 25 from my game site, a few local but most from a cross country trip i took a few years ago. He has met two of them and likes them, but still doesn't want me meeting people. My online friends are part of my life and i don't want that to change. So please don't anyone tell Him about cages LOL.

< Message edited by proudsub -- 10/18/2004 12:24:26 PM >

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan


(in reply to EStrict)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Chatting-Slaves - 10/18/2004 2:44:50 PM   
INSIDEYOURMIND


Posts: 483
Status: offline 		This lifestyle is based on trust, if there is distrust, then the basic element of your relationship , vanilla, D/s, whatever is gone.
I encourage my sub to chat, she has made good friends with folks online, I think the difference is she understands real from online.
I trust her completely.
When I met her, I changed my profile as did she, we are no longer looking.
We may at some point entertain another sub, but strictly as a play partner, and friend.

_____________________________

If I got smart with you.................
How would you know?

(in reply to proudsub)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Chatting-Slaves - 10/18/2004 5:37:31 PM   
IservBlkKingPaPa


Posts: 84
Joined: 8/17/2004
From: Long Island NY
Status: offline 		this slave is allowed to chat online to whom ever she chooses to as long as she does not neglect her duties. she is trusted to obey orders. it is known that she is not to send out X rated pictures of herself without permission or speak on the phone to anyone without permission. Other than that she is free to enjoy the internet



@}PaPa's}slave}--
Every Rose has her Thorns...

(in reply to INSIDEYOURMIND)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Chatting-Slaves - 10/18/2004 8:08:00 PM   
velvetvixen


Posts: 378
Joined: 1/19/2004
Status: offline 		I know this is in the Ask a Master section, but I will beg forgiveness and post-- I am free to use the internet so long as it does not interfere with the performance of my chores. I do not live with Master, but it is and always has been real time.

(in reply to MDdesiree)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Chatting-Slaves - 2/21/2006 6:56:41 AM   
MrMarkito


Posts: 3
Joined: 1/4/2005
Status: offline 		Although I've had more submissives than true slaves I'd say it's a very individual thing. Also, such an indulgance may have more to do with timing than anything else. In the beginning of a relationship, when I'm training a girl there is more drudgery and stress and she would be more likely to get distracted. Later, when she has more time and is more confident in her place I would be less concerned about her chatting. Still I would set some guidelines--especially ones related to protecting her person and our identities.

(in reply to velvetvixen)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Chatting-Slaves - 2/21/2006 7:14:35 AM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline 		If I were looking and found the kajira I'd want, she would be encouraged to chat and I'd probable be on line at the same time too. I've found in the past many people who I still keep in contact with and learn from them about a diverse range of subjects......

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to MrMarkito)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Chatting-Slaves - 2/21/2006 7:16:00 AM   
Wolfspet


Posts: 143
Joined: 1/11/2004
Status: offline 		Wolf couldn't care less what I do online. Our relationship was forged before the internet came into existance.

(in reply to MrMarkito)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Chatting-Slaves - 2/21/2006 7:22:55 AM   
MHOO314


Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline 		I promised him I would never keep him from his friends, his family, his convictions---I trust him completely.

As for what happens--I found him here, W/we are a RT couple currently miles apart. but living together in mind and spirit and making plans for his move to Me.

_____________________________

SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor


(in reply to MDdesiree)
Profile   Post #: 20
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