RE: Is doing all household tasks worth a person's living expenses TO YOU? (Full Version)

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MissAsylum -> RE: Is doing all household tasks worth a person's living expenses TO YOU? (9/25/2011 10:54:35 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

I do think the fantasy is fabulous. Lord knows I would love to come home from work, take care of my animals (because that is MY thing) and then do whatever the hell I wanted on evenings and weekends.

But yeah, I am a big picture kinda person. I demand that I prepare as best I can for worst case scenarios. Illness, forced retirement, just everything. I know that while I could feed, clothe, and house another person......I cannot afford a health insurance policy for them, I cannot afford to insure another driver with....? driving record. I cannot afford to create another nest egg/retirement plan.

And, I know that caring for me and mine is NOT a full time position. There is only so much cleaning this cute little house on the hill needs. I suppose I could demand they trim 3 acres of lawn with scissors or shovel the lane with a soup spoon but that really isn't my kink.


This was a point that I had attempted to drive home in the other thread.

If I were to clean my house (3 bed room, 2.5 bath) from top to bottom, it takes around 5 hours (I probably took a break to eat and watch "Mad Men" at some point), and its clean for the rest of the week.

I also have a live in boyfriend and my younger brother staying with me. We use a lot of dishes, by they only need to be done every other day. And the house rule is, "you fuck it up, you clean it up".

Outside care, maybe 3 hours every other week, which my boyfriend or brother does.

apparently I'm a weird woman, but I actually enjoy cooking.

So really, what is there for another person to do besides take up space?



agirl -> RE: Is doing all household tasks worth a person's living expenses TO YOU? (9/25/2011 10:59:28 AM)

Possibly it'd be worth it for ME.

I've managed to support my lanky 6' sons and not had them at my beck and call to run around cooking, cleaning, gardening or house maintainance. I'd consider it a lodger who's board and bed was paid for in *kind*......and there's a lot of *kind* to be done here....lol

Of course, I'm not a dom and not interested in a relationship, but if I was, I can't see why it seems so dreadful. It depends entirely on what's important to you and as a UK resident I don't have this obsession with healthcare.

I'd happily board one of my son's friends if I got that return from it.

agirl



LaTigresse -> RE: Is doing all household tasks worth a person's living expenses TO YOU? (9/25/2011 11:06:27 AM)

As I said.........I do understand the benefits most certainly. However because I do think long term and big picture, there is a great deal more to it than just health care.

I cannot afford to set up another house and provide for a person indefinitely,, until they find another job. Which is exactly what I would feel my responsibility would be, IF I had a person dependent upon me to the extent we are discussing, and they had no other financial safety net, and one or both of use decided US was not working out.



Awareness -> RE: Is doing all household tasks worth a person's living expenses TO YOU? (9/25/2011 11:29:56 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse
No it is you who's perspective is skewed.

I am devoting a thread to trying to understand a mindset of a desired reality. It has nothing to do with fantasy.
  Oh really.  You've been in the lifestyle how long and all of a sudden you're trying to understand M/s?  And here I was thinking Kev baby had provoked you into making a thread so you can validate your dislike of him by gathering support from your fellow sycophants here.



HisPet21 -> RE: Is doing all household tasks worth a person's living expenses TO YOU? (9/25/2011 11:34:35 AM)

I'm going to agree with Topaz, here. If all the supposed live-in maid needs to do is clean a small home and cook a few simple meals, then the cost of sustaining the live-in maid would far exceed the benefits. But if the live in maid is going all out in the interest of service, and the dom can afford it, I really don't see the problem. I believe that, if done right, service can be a full time job, especially if you own a rather large house. And if the live-in maid has a relationship with, or is married to, the dom, the dom isn't really PAYING for the sub. The dom and sub are working as a team, one providing one resource to the household (money) and the other providing another service (all the chores, cooking, errands, scheduling, DONE).

If the sub wakes you up, every morning, with some nice kisses and a hot breakfast in bed, complete with a perfectly brewed cup of tea, with beautiful music playing in the background, that takes time. If you then have your clothes, nicely ironed and ready to go, along with your briefcase, that takes time. Washing your car weekly, so that it smells nice, has its oil changed, and has plenty of gas each day of each week...that takes time. Cleaning the house to perfection, decorating it nicely (especially for the holidays),and managing all the daily chores takes time. Learning how to cook a wide variety of four course meals, ready for your dom when he/she comes home every evening, takes time. Learning how to properly massage your dom takes time. Drawing and setting up a luxurious bath takes time. Learning how to give professionally done pedicures and manicures, if your dom so desires, takes time. Landscaping a gorgeous garden, and keeping it up, veggies, flowers, herbs, trees and all takes time.

Its all about what people want and if they can afford what they want. If they can, why the hell not?



needsaroom -> RE: Is doing all household tasks worth a person's living expenses TO YOU? (9/25/2011 11:35:53 AM)

I'm male. Providing for a wife is a given. Wife and kids eat free. It's in the manual. Taking from women and children is not allowed. That is on the next page of the manual. I don't know what but something bad happens if you violate the directives. I think maybe the world as we know it ends. I don't want to find out. BDSM doesn't qualify as an excuse, either.

Quid pro quo doesn't belong in personal relationships. Give because you can, not as a part of a transaction in order to get something. What you get by giving is, you get to give. If that is not a reward in and of itself, don't do it. Watch TV instead. That is why God make couches. Are you a man or a potato?

Paid work is different. Now we're talking about wage slaves. Then it's just a job no matter what else you pretend it is. If I was thinking about work being worth the money I would be considering an employment situation and not a personal relationship. Maid or butler, something like that. I would have to see the uniform before making a decision.



JstAnotherSub -> RE: Is doing all household tasks worth a person's living expenses TO YOU? (9/25/2011 11:38:52 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

To derail a derail......

Do you (whomever you are and whatever your part of the power exchange/service dynamic) feel that having a person entirely devoted to caring for.....home, personal affairs, whatever... is worth the expense of properly providing for that person.

If yes, why and how? If no, why and how?


I have seriously dreamed of having some one who would do all the stuff around the house.  To come home and have housework done, laundry done, supper ready, all that, would be bliss.

But, as a upper class of the lower class chickie, or maybe a lower class of an upper class chickie, I am betting it aint never gonna happen.

Nice to dream though.



agirl -> RE: Is doing all household tasks worth a person's living expenses TO YOU? (9/25/2011 11:39:57 AM)

I suppose I don't see it much differently than if M lived with me and saw to all the hideous amounts of work that needs doing. If our relationship ended, I'd expect him to sort himself out. I wouldn't feel obligated to sort him out and look after him, he would have thought about that before he chose to do it.

agirl 



zephyroftheNorth -> RE: Is doing all household tasks worth a person's living expenses TO YOU? (9/25/2011 12:04:21 PM)

quote:

I have seriously dreamed of having some one who would do all the stuff around the house.  To come home and have housework done, laundry done, supper ready, all that, would be bliss.

But, as a upper class of the lower class chickie, or maybe a lower class of an upper class chickie, I am betting it aint never gonna happen.

Nice to dream though


Heh I know what you mean, it would be nice wouldn't it. Since I live in a 2 1/2 room apartment, I would really find it hard to justify but yes the lazy/overworked part of me would love it.



agirl -> RE: Is doing all household tasks worth a person's living expenses TO YOU? (9/25/2011 12:11:25 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

I cannot afford to set up another house and provide for a person indefinitely,, until they find another job. Which is exactly what I would feel my responsibility would be, IF I had a person dependent upon me to the extent we are discussing, and they had no other financial safety net, and one or both of use decided US was not working out.



Just read this part again.

They aren't dependant on YOU. They would have made a rational and positive choice to be in the situation.  When the situation ends, their welfare is where it always was........with themselves.

Both have got what they wanted from the arrangement and neither *owes* the other anything. Furthermore, if I couldn't trust someone to make that kind of decision I wouldn't be trusting them with my washing machine and my whites.......lol

agirl



Epytropos -> RE: Is doing all household tasks worth a person's living expenses TO YOU? (9/25/2011 12:21:13 PM)

Frankly I don't give that many shits about house work. Cooking would be nice, but the one time I had someone live-in to do all my cleaning I went nuts in about 2 weeks because it was all so goddamn sterile and forbade her to clean any more. Actually that applies quite broadly - virtually anything that requires maintenance I just straight up don't like. Especially grass. Whose idea was that? Lawn grass is one of the absolute ugliest plants in the world and by far the most labor-intensive of the common landscaping stuff, yet it is almost universally used. It boggles the fucking mind.

So I suppose the question doesn't really apply to me - the majority of domestic chores actually sap my inner peace when carefully attended to, even by someone else, and what little is left is hardly worth the upkeep.

ETA: That being said, if a slave could do the full personal assistant bit - keep track of vehicle maintenance, appointments, phone calls, filing, general errands, driving me from place to place, and all the rest of that Pepper Pots shit that makes my day worse that would be closer to worth it. I would probably be willing to support a slave if that stuff took up enough of her time that she couldn't reasonably work and I had the cash to do it.



tj444 -> RE: Is doing all household tasks worth a person's living expenses TO YOU? (9/25/2011 12:27:13 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Awareness

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse
No it is you who's perspective is skewed.

I am devoting a thread to trying to understand a mindset of a desired reality. It has nothing to do with fantasy.
  Oh really.  You've been in the lifestyle how long and all of a sudden you're trying to understand M/s?  And here I was thinking Kev baby had provoked you into making a thread so you can validate your dislike of him by gathering support from your fellow sycophants here.

Ya know,.. if Kev baby would be willing to get knocked up, spit out kiddies and take care of them 24/7.. then it might just be worth it.. [:D]



agirl -> RE: Is doing all household tasks worth a person's living expenses TO YOU? (9/25/2011 12:27:54 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: zephyroftheNorth

quote:

I have seriously dreamed of having some one who would do all the stuff around the house.  To come home and have housework done, laundry done, supper ready, all that, would be bliss.

But, as a upper class of the lower class chickie, or maybe a lower class of an upper class chickie, I am betting it aint never gonna happen.

Nice to dream though


Heh I know what you mean, it would be nice wouldn't it. Since I live in a 2 1/2 room apartment, I would really find it hard to justify but yes the lazy/overworked part of me would love it.


I live in an 8 roomed Victorian town house with a big garden. There's always plenty of grotty maintainance to be done. I'm not well off but if I can keep a 19 yr old and a 17yr old, who don't do those things, now that the elder one has moved off into independant life, I'd actually be better off! :-)

agirl



LadyHibiscus -> RE: Is doing all household tasks worth a person's living expenses TO YOU? (9/25/2011 12:35:08 PM)

Would I have a househusband? If I could afford it, maybe. I am self employed, sothe health insurance costs would be staggering, and the retirement issue...well, let's say I don't expect I will ever be able to afford it!

A house slave would have to work outside the home, to provide for his/her social security credits, at least! We have a decent house, but we manage just fine without help, other than the lawn service.




Hisprettybaby -> RE: Is doing all household tasks worth a person's living expenses TO YOU? (9/25/2011 12:36:27 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Awareness

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse
No it is you who's perspective is skewed.

I am devoting a thread to trying to understand a mindset of a desired reality. It has nothing to do with fantasy.
 
Oh really.  You've been in the lifestyle how long and all of a sudden you're trying to understand M/s?  And here I was thinking Kev baby had provoked you into making a thread so you can validate your dislike of him by gathering support from your fellow sycophants here.


Shit! I had to look up that word in Dictionary.com.
syc·o·phant [sik-uh-fuhnt, -fant, sahy-kuh-] Show IPA
noun
a self-seeking, servile flatterer; fawning parasite.

You certainly are flattering, aren't you. What makes you so special and superior? Just because she wants to find out the answer to a legitimate question, what's the big deal about why she wants to know?

~Hisprettybaby~





Arpig -> RE: Is doing all household tasks worth a person's living expenses TO YOU? (9/25/2011 12:36:42 PM)

Isn't that the definition of a housewife?



LadyHibiscus -> RE: Is doing all household tasks worth a person's living expenses TO YOU? (9/25/2011 12:38:15 PM)

A sycophant? [:D]



Hisprettybaby -> RE: Is doing all household tasks worth a person's living expenses TO YOU? (9/25/2011 12:40:49 PM)

Forget it. Oopsie.



agirl -> RE: Is doing all household tasks worth a person's living expenses TO YOU? (9/25/2011 12:51:21 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig

Isn't that the definition of a housewife?


Pretty much.

I was one, with a baby and a pre-schooler. My husband wouldn't consider moving out so I found a small cottage to rent and moved out with the children. I childminded four other children to keep us and my husband paid a little toward the children.

Just because you've been in a live-in situation doesn't mean you're pathetically unable to sort out the situation if needed.

agirl



agirl -> RE: Is doing all household tasks worth a person's living expenses TO YOU? (9/25/2011 12:56:38 PM)

Out of curiousity, and because I hear so much ooing and ahhing about *health insurance costs*........ why would any of you be liable for someone that didn't see to their own insurance? What happens to people that don't have health care insurance? Are they refused hospital treatment or medication from GP's if they are poorly?

agirl

edited to add..... Not the right place to ask this, I realise.



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