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RE: Two Profiles, One Dominant? - 10/11/2011 7:27:46 AM

windchymes

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People have their quirks. He probably got burned somewhere in his past, and he decided creating multiple profiles to check up on his potential partners would keep him "safe". I agree that it's dumb and takes way more effort that I myself would have the time or energy for.

One time, I was meeting someone I had briefly emailed, and we decided to meet and have dinner, since we lived in the same town. As soon as we were seated, he pulled his drivers license out of his wallet and literally tossed it across the table to me. He thought he was doing a nice thing, so I could see his name & address and feel comfortable. But yes, I found it a little weird, it made me more uncomfortable than comfortable, and sure enough, other little weird things appeared on the next....and last.....date we had.

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Post #: 21

RE: Two Profiles, One Dominant? - 10/11/2011 8:08:03 AM

LadyHibiscus

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From: Island Of Misfit Toys
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quote:

ORIGINAL: HannahLynHeather

i think its a pretty fucking scummy thing to do.

Agreeing with Heather. I have run into this similar issue with sub males, sometimes they will return to the other side with a new profile and act as if we have never met... it's tacky shit, and I have no trouble dropping them.

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Post #: 22

RE: Two Profiles, One Dominant? - 10/11/2011 8:32:33 AM

Hisprettybaby

Posts: 781
Joined: 4/13/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

quote:

ORIGINAL: HannahLynHeather

i think its a pretty fucking scummy thing to do.

Agreeing with Heather. I have run into this similar issue with sub males, sometimes they will return to the other side with a new profile and act as if we have never met... it's tacky shit, and I have no trouble dropping them.

That is so crappy! And such bad behavior!!

~Hisprettybaby~

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)

Post #: 23

RE: Two Profiles, One Dominant? - 10/11/2011 12:09:26 PM

kalikshama

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Joined: 8/8/2010
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quote:

I am going to a munch this weekend. (Yikes - but that's for another thread, which there just was one like that, so I'll just pipe down.) I live outside of Boston - if I can't meet someone through getting a bit more into (or, a bit at all into) some of the groups there, then I suppose I'm not trying hard enough.

I see you are North of Boston - I am South - but which munch are you going to? Let me know if you've started that other thread.

I met a couple online here who live in NH. They go to all the local munches and might be able to help you network. PM me if you'd like their contact info.

Regarding your OP - yeah, creepy.

(in reply to Kaliko)

Post #: 24

RE: Two Profiles, One Dominant? - 10/11/2011 3:27:10 PM

Kaliko

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quote:

ORIGINAL: windchymes

As soon as we were seated, he pulled his drivers license out of his wallet and literally tossed it across the table to me. He thought he was doing a nice thing, so I could see his name & address and feel comfortable.

LOL - I would have appreciated that, actually. So yes...to each his/her quirks, I guess.

(in reply to windchymes)

Post #: 25

RE: Two Profiles, One Dominant? - 10/11/2011 3:32:45 PM

windchymes

Posts: 9410
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Kaliko

quote:

ORIGINAL: windchymes

As soon as we were seated, he pulled his drivers license out of his wallet and literally tossed it across the table to me. He thought he was doing a nice thing, so I could see his name & address and feel comfortable.

LOL - I would have appreciated that, actually. So yes...to each his/her quirks, I guess.

It was the way he did it, not the act itself, I guess. I mean, we were barely in our seats and still had our coats on, the hostess was hovering, passing out menus.....and he was tossing the DL across the table at me, like I was carding him, lol.

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Post #: 26

RE: Two Profiles, One Dominant? - 10/11/2011 5:04:33 PM

SailingBum

Posts: 3225
Joined: 12/10/2007
From: Sailin the stormy sea
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Kaliko

quote:

ORIGINAL: SailingBum

Turn off the CPU and go out... I can guarantee that what you described will never happen nor the other stupid shit that befalls ppl who do online dating. My actual weight is... My actual age is .... My personal fav...Actually I'm a guy.

I am. Online is beginning to lose its appeal in a big way, now that I am much more seriously looking than before, when I wasn't quite sure I was ready to move on.

I am going to a munch this weekend. (Yikes - but that's for another thread, which there just was one like that, so I'll just pipe down.) I live outside of Boston - if I can't meet someone through getting a bit more into (or, a bit at all into) some of the groups there, then I suppose I'm not trying hard enough.

YEP Yep good idea... thou you don't have to hit a munch to find ppl to go out with. I can think of one time in my life that I hooked up with someone online or thru a kink site <she was local> The point being that all the smoking hot bitches Ive gone out with I met in the "traditional" way. Playing sports, hanging out with friends ... you get the idea.

BadOne

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Post #: 27

RE: Two Profiles, One Dominant? - 10/11/2011 5:44:21 PM

Kaliko

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Joined: 9/25/2010
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SailingBum

YEP Yep good idea... thou you don't have to hit a munch to find ppl to go out with. I can think of one time in my life that I hooked up with someone online or thru a kink site <she was local> The point being that all the smoking hot bitches Ive gone out with I met in the "traditional" way. Playing sports, hanging out with friends ... you get the idea.

BadOne

Yes....but....I know pretty specifically what I need in a man right now. Maybe not forever, but...right now. And I know that my chances are increased by staying within circles where those interests are prominently displayed and talked about on his part. That way...there's no guessing...no time wasting...just fucking do it to me. (Not sex. Jeez...I'm not a slut.....well...not always.)

If I were judging by looks, or sense of humor, or a compassionate demeanor, then yes...I could meet someone anywhere, anytime. I know that. But what I want done to me is quite specific. I know where to look. I think.

Ironically, the reason I know what I so badly want is due to a man I met not through kink avenues...though he most definitely is involved.

Oh, Bad One...I will probably wind up meeting the man of my dreams while I'm on line in the post office. Until then...I'm going to a munch.

ETA - I don't expect to find the man I need at a munch. I've read enough to know not to expect that. I just hope to meet people who know people who know people....

< Message edited by Kaliko -- 10/11/2011 5:50:04 PM >

(in reply to SailingBum)

Post #: 28

RE: Two Profiles, One Dominant? - 10/11/2011 8:59:01 PM

StrongSpirit

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Joined: 4/10/2005
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OK, it's time to tell you the truth. This entire website is a fake that I put up to talk to women. There are no other men on this web site, just me. Not only am I both of the men you mentioned, but in fact I am all the men on the entire website.

:D

Seriously, not all men lie. If you exclude white lies (particularly if white lies include silly things like 2 inches/5 lbs - both are about 1/30th of normal values), then most tell the truth. If you think all men are untruthful, then one of four things are going on.

a) You are the unluckiest person in the world.
b) You are self-selecting for dishonest people - probably by ignoring all the reasonable men and concentrating on the unreasonable ones. If you only talk to Ferrari owners, it's no surprise that you think all men are liars.
c) You consistently mistake honest men for liars.
d) You are counting silly crap like when a men tells you no, you don't look fat in that dress. Tell me, do you refuse to wear make up because it is deceptive? Did you never lie about your age or weight? Do you tell your boss you were late because you got drunk last night?

Humans are one race. Men are no worse (or better) than women. The differences between us are cultural, no genetic, and culture is more about how you do stuff than about what you do.

If you think you found a difference, chances are the real issue is you, not them. It took me years to figure that out - I kept blaming women for being too assertive. Eventually I realized that I was dominant and needed a woman that was unusually submissive.

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 29

RE: Two Profiles, One Dominant? - 10/11/2011 10:17:33 PM

HannahLynHeather

Posts: 2950
Joined: 4/4/2011
From: where it's at
Status: offline

quote:

ETA - I don't expect to find the man I need at a munch. I've read enough to know not to expect that. I just hope to meet people who know people who know people....

there ya go, that's the fucking idea. get your ass to that munch and network, network, network.

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i hope you enjoyed the post, and as always my friends....have a nice day

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Post #: 30

RE: Two Profiles, One Dominant? - 10/11/2011 11:46:11 PM

Contentment

Posts: 63
Joined: 5/27/2011
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: StrongSpirit

OK, it's time to tell you the truth. This entire website is a fake that I put up to talk to women. There are no other men on this web site, just me. Not only am I both of the men you mentioned, but in fact I am all the men on the entire website.

:D

That is the exact joke response I was thinking while reading this thread.

But seriously, don't allow one example of a person control your mood. Your strong, don't let it get to you.

Yeah, got a guy with extra profiles. Probably means he determined he'd have better luck with quantity rather than quality. Just means he probably isn't worth your time.

Dunno, might be a great guy, I'm not really trying to convince you whether he's good or bad, that's your own decision.

Hope you have a better day tomorrow and hope you find your man.

(in reply to StrongSpirit)

Post #: 31

RE: Two Profiles, One Dominant? - 10/12/2011 5:25:40 AM

Tristan

Posts: 330
Joined: 5/31/2004
Status: offline

I used to notice several duplicate profiles from submissive women in my area. The profiles had different names and pictures. However, the ages and locations were the same, and I would notice these pairs of profiles consistently logging in at very similar times.

I have no idea what the purpose of these duplicate profiles were. I did not contact any of them because I assumed they were all fakes.

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 32

RE: Two Profiles, One Dominant? - 10/12/2011 7:57:55 AM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: StrongSpirit
b) You are self-selecting for dishonest people - probably by ignoring all the reasonable men and concentrating on the unreasonable ones. If you only talk to Ferrari owners, it's no surprise that you think all men are liars.

Humans are one race. Men are no worse (or better) than women. The differences between us are cultural, no genetic, and culture is more about how you do stuff than about what you do.

If you think you found a difference, chances are the real issue is you, not them. It took me years to figure that out - I kept blaming women for being too assertive. Eventually I realized that I was dominant and needed a woman that was unusually submissive.

Agree with the first point. We tend to go for what is familiar. Familiar as in replicates patterns from our family of origin. If your father was not interested in you, odds are you'll pick a guy who is emotionally and/or physically distant as well in the hopes that this time it will come out right. It won't.

Re the second point. Actually we're not the same. Men are better liars and women are better at detecting lies. This comes from the male drive to spread sperm around among multiple women while women need to be able to detect that in order to pick a partner who will be there and help support offspring.

Now nothing says that this guy wasn't just an accident you encountered. If most of the people you talk to are honest but just not compatible, that's the norm. As far as why he did this? I agree it's likely that it is in response to some woman in his past who lied to him so he became obsessive about checking to see if he was being lied to. And that he couldn't see that this behavior caused his relationships to fail. Because any woman who said "No prob, you can lie to me repeatedly but I'll be honest with you" is not a healthy individual.

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Post #: 33

RE: Two Profiles, One Dominant? - 10/12/2011 11:09:09 AM

Contentment

Posts: 63
Joined: 5/27/2011
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP
Re the second point. Actually we're not the same. Men are better liars and women are better at detecting lies. This comes from the male drive to spread sperm around among multiple women while women need to be able to detect that in order to pick a partner who will be there and help support offspring.

Sounds like you've only encountered a percentage of men. Or perhaps, your just worse at detecting lies in men.

Personally, I find men and women to be so diverse in nature that any sort of generalization isn't really accurate (which could include this one).

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 34

RE: Two Profiles, One Dominant? - 10/12/2011 11:23:20 AM

LillyBoPeep

Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
Status: offline

i don't believe men are better liars and women are better at detecting lies.
women are more likely to kill people by poisoning, usually through something made with "love and care" -- that's a pretty big lie. =p
and how many times do women fall for the "i'm sorry baby, i'll change!" line? haha

but, in all seriousness, i have to agree with Contentment -- there are SOME generalizations that you can point at, but i don't think you should use them pre-emptively in basic interactions or to judge people you don't even know.

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(in reply to Contentment)

Post #: 35

RE: Two Profiles, One Dominant? - 10/12/2011 9:34:03 PM

tj444

Posts: 7574
Joined: 3/7/2010
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Contentment
Yeah, got a guy with extra profiles. Probably means he determined he'd have better luck with quantity rather than quality. Just means he probably isn't worth your time.

Ummm,... or maybe one time when this site had a glitch and he couldnt log on, he made another profile to see if that worked. Lots of people have done that, especially if they come to the forums mostly. The last time there was a glitch it lasted several days, longer for some people too, I think.

Or it could be that he didnt like his profile name or it no longer fit him and since you cant change that, you have to set up a whole new profile in the better name but you might still have friends from your old profile so while transitioning to the new one, forget which one you were logged in as.. That happens too.

Now those are two perfectly innocent situations which also could account for why said guy talked to the OP mostly from one profile and he had no problem telling her both were his. Perhaps he didnt think it was odd and if the OP didnt ask why, then who knows what the actual story is.

I personally think everyone lies about something, the question is, to what level do they lie and is it acceptable to you or not. I sometimes like to watch people and play with them online and see their reaction. Like the guy that hasnt read my profile but he says in his first email that he likes what I said in it.. So,.. if i ask him what he liked about my profile, then he has got to read it and find something to tell me. LOL I find that rather humourous and predictable (since human nature does tend to be fairly predictable).

Imo, people lie more online than perhaps they would in real life since online is not real until you do meet. And its anonymous and especially for longer distances, the chance of meeting for real are less. So, its little white lie after little white lie... For me, certain lies turn me off and cause me to distrust everything the person says... which might very well mean we never meet since i am turned off too much by then.

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Post #: 36

RE: Two Profiles, One Dominant? - 10/13/2011 8:42:31 AM

kalikshama

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quote:

Like the guy that hasnt read my profile but he says in his first email that he likes what I said in it.. So,.. if i ask him what he liked about my profile, then he has got to read it and find something to tell me. LOL

Ya, I'd get that. At the time he wrote, he hadn't viewed my profile, then after I asked him what he liked about it, he shows up in my viewed list. Then he doesn't have the balls to admit it and the conversation ceases.

(in reply to tj444)

Post #: 37

RE: Two Profiles, One Dominant? - 10/13/2011 9:49:53 AM

hlen5

Posts: 5890
Joined: 3/2/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: kalikshama

quote:

Like the guy that hasnt read my profile but he says in his first email that he likes what I said in it.. So,.. if i ask him what he liked about my profile, then he has got to read it and find something to tell me. LOL

Ya, I'd get that. At the time he wrote, he hadn't viewed my profile, then after I asked him what he liked about it, he shows up in my viewed list. Then he doesn't have the balls to admit it and the conversation ceases.

I thought the same thing, but couldn't your profile be one that pops up when they sign on? Personally the first thing I ask is "What did you like about it?", too!!

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(in reply to kalikshama)

Post #: 38

RE: Two Profiles, One Dominant? - 10/13/2011 3:48:42 PM

kalikshama

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Joined: 8/8/2010
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That's not reading the profile, that's reading the snapshot, which I consider LAZY.

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Post #: 39

RE: Two Profiles, One Dominant? - 10/13/2011 4:09:36 PM

tj444

Posts: 7574
Joined: 3/7/2010
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quote:

ORIGINAL: hlen5

quote:

ORIGINAL: kalikshama

quote:

Like the guy that hasnt read my profile but he says in his first email that he likes what I said in it.. So,.. if i ask him what he liked about my profile, then he has got to read it and find something to tell me. LOL

Ya, I'd get that. At the time he wrote, he hadn't viewed my profile, then after I asked him what he liked about it, he shows up in my viewed list. Then he doesn't have the balls to admit it and the conversation ceases.

I thought the same thing, but couldn't your profile be one that pops up when they sign on? Personally the first thing I ask is "What did you like about it?", too!!

I know you can be signed in and on the first page is a list of profiles and you can send a quick note/email to the person at the top but still, there isnt much on that page that tells anyone much about you. And if they then have to look at it again to tell you what they liked, well, they sure forgot fast why they emailed you in the first place. Some of those emails from guys also have that bright red spam warning attached which of course doesnt bode well for them either. lol

If you are going to email someone from the first page, you should still take the one minute to look at their complete profile first anyway imo.. How serious can they be if they dont?

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Post #: 40

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