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Is BDSM a choice? - 11/23/2011 7:25:26 AM

MrBukani

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Is BDSM hereditary, genetic or just a preference?

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RE: Is BDSM a choice? - 11/23/2011 7:43:48 AM

Delilya

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Well I Have run across other family members here, including one of my children. shrugs. No, they did not know until grown that Mom lived outside the box.

< Message edited by Delilya -- 11/23/2011 7:44:41 AM >

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RE: Is BDSM a choice? - 11/23/2011 7:50:11 AM

LillyBoPeep

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I've wondered about this. =p Not excessively, but just in like a passing fancy sorta way.
Like my fantasies were how they were when I was younger, even though I was pretty sheltered and not allowed to watch certain movies and TV channels. So where did they come from? I dunno. =p

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RE: Is BDSM a choice? - 11/23/2011 7:54:11 AM

anniezz338

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I do not think there is a BDSM gene, at least not one i have heard of. I wouldn't make this a blanket statement but i feel some environments can contribute. Preference...yes.

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RE: Is BDSM a choice? - 11/23/2011 8:06:16 AM

coookie

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I think it is a combination of biology, environment, and personal preferences. You see some animals out of the womb that show more submissive or dominant traits than others. Environment does play a part in that how we are raised plays into how we respond to it.

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RE: Is BDSM a choice? - 11/23/2011 9:05:24 AM

littlewonder

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environment and preference. I don't think it has anything at all to do with genetics.

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RE: Is BDSM a choice? - 11/23/2011 10:35:06 AM

HisPet21

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For me, submission is a choice. I strongly believe in making your partner the focus of your life, so I choose to submit to my partner in an attempt to make him as happy as I can. Kinkyness, on the other hand, is straight up genetic (I think). I was having submissive/masochistic fantasies before I even knew what sex was, so I am pretty sure its hard wired into me.

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RE: Is BDSM a choice? - 11/23/2011 10:45:45 AM

DesFIP

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I'm curious if the op is talking about d/s or kink.
And what's the difference between hereditary and genetics?

Like everything else, it's a mixture of all possible factors: nature and nurture, environmental factors, hormones, early exposure that imprints it on your mind, and a dozen other things.

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RE: Is BDSM a choice? - 11/23/2011 10:49:06 AM

MrBukani

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http://www.guardian.co.uk/science/2011/nov/14/gene-raises-suicide

Just stumbled upon this link. I do think genetic make up defines a lot, about who we are and what we like. It doesn't eliminate the freedom to choose and preferences we develop, Just like surroundings and environment make up a lot of who we are and become. But I do believe genes have more influence on who we are, in every aspect the mind. When talkin about physical appearance, we all know genes play the most definitive role. The brain is different of course, because it develops much more...
If we want to succeed in life. Be our true self and happy.
What is really a choice? And what is defined from birth.
And if some day all genes are defined. Would I want to know?.

< Message edited by MrBukani -- 11/23/2011 11:20:19 AM >

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RE: Is BDSM a choice? - 11/23/2011 11:04:27 AM

MrBukani

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D/s and kink in general.
D/s is kinda bound to genetics IMO.
Kink is not defined yet as a genetic or an hereditary thing
Difference between genetics and hereditary is that genetics has more variables. We do not inherit every gene of our parents. We do have greater chances to inherit certain things if it runs in the family. I know it's a bit hard to differentiate. Hope this helps

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RE: Is BDSM a choice? - 11/23/2011 11:12:46 AM

straponprincess1

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Preference for sure

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RE: Is BDSM a choice? - 11/23/2011 11:27:17 AM

GreedyTop

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I think, mostly, submission is a choice. Look at all the submissives that are alphas outside of their relationships...

I think maso/sado stuff is hardwired.

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RE: Is BDSM a choice? - 11/23/2011 1:41:39 PM

LafayetteLady

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The dominant/submissive portions would be genetic and somewhat environmental. Similar to people who are introverted/extroverted. The kinky activities, I don't believe have any genetics involved at all. Just like most people in the world fall somewhere on one side or the other with being introverted or extroverted, likewise people will fall on one side or the other with dominance or submission.

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RE: Is BDSM a choice? - 11/23/2011 2:11:21 PM

MrBukani

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I know its a subject wich doesn't have a final anwer yet. Why I said hereditary, is because it is proven in alcoholism to be true. It can travel through generations. And its not like a disease. It's a condition, it's a choice to drink or not...It can alter your mindset and also someones genetic make up in a way.. I dont wanna compare bdsm to an addiction nor a disease. But most research is done in that field, so it's the only reference to speculate on. Cleaning out my ancentral house, I found some kinky stuff belonging to my parents and I had one other hint. Never really expected it. But it brought me to this thought.

So it could be we are mutating ourselves, in our own lives and pass it on to our children.
Not just with food but also with thoughts.

I think all components are involved, Genes, ancestors and personal preference evolving in surroundings.

< Message edited by MrBukani -- 11/23/2011 2:16:06 PM >

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RE: Is BDSM a choice? - 11/23/2011 2:54:22 PM

Suleiman

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MrBukani

Is BDSM hereditary, genetic or just a preference?

Yes.

We choose to act on our impulses, based on experience ("nurture"), but our basic impulses often come from some deeper level. In some instances, the drive towards fetishistic behavior is overpowering and dysfunctional - choice, in such a situation, is abrogated, if not suspended. For the rest of us, we choose.

I presume, from the use of 'hereditary' and 'genetic' in the original post, that inheritance in this instance implies childhood background, rearing, and enculturation, as opposed to an inborn predisposition towards certain behaviors, yes?

fetish can be learned, through what is essentially behavioral conditioning. Fetish can be preferred, either as a rejection of heteronormative mainstream culture, or simply because the trappings of kink are enjoyable. Both principles are more effective when dealing with someone who is predisposed, but predisposition is not nessesary. If you have the time, the skills, and an utter lack of humanity, you can "teach" someone who is otherwise ultra-vanilla, with no desire or predisposition whatsoever, to enjoy any fetish you like. They'll be a soul-damaged brainwashed shell carrying the scars of your violation to the end of their days, but you can do it.

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RE: Is BDSM a choice? - 11/23/2011 3:13:53 PM

ResidentSadist

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Technically, just about everything voluntary is a choice. So I would ask if BDSM was voluntary or not.

Is it genetic or hereditary? I know my parents were lifestyle and tried their best not to influence my lifestyle, but look at me now. At the least, I would say BDSM is … well, I I would say it’s contagious.

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RE: Is BDSM a choice? - 11/23/2011 3:53:43 PM

TheFireWithinMe

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Which choice will get me a good long beating?

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RE: Is BDSM a choice? - 11/23/2011 3:55:54 PM

Madame4a

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I don't think its any of those things... its an orientation for me, just like being a dyke is... not something I chose or a preference...

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RE: Is BDSM a choice? - 11/23/2011 4:39:33 PM

MissImmortalPain

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MrBukani

Is BDSM a choice?

Yes, it is.

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RE: Is BDSM a choice? - 11/23/2011 7:13:38 PM

caelestis

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Well... I think biology can certainly effect how our bodies respond to certain things. For instance, I have cushing's sydrome, which increases the level of my adrenocorticotrophic hormones and in turn, raises the levels of my endorphins. I openly admit that I love the endorphin rushes, I always have, even before I knew what they were. Early in my life it was through exercising, now it is through pain, danger, and arousal. While I've always been a more submissive person, I think I came to this through the allure of pain.

I don't think it was really much of a choice for me. Long before I was consciously going after dominant men, I was subconsciously seeking it out in the guys that were around, and it led me to some dangerous situations, because I wasn't being smart about it. At all.

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