Ask Uncle Niney.

Ask Uncle Niney. (Full Version)

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Ninebelowzero -> Ask Uncle Niney. (11/25/2011 5:20:04 PM)
Having been used as a sounding board for a number of important issues for you ladies in private I thought it time to open an official advice line. Just think Oprey with the word cunt used a lot. Now this is something that keeps being asked by lots of ladies. Parachuting. Can I do it naked? Well the answer is a definite yes. You can if you want to risk permanent hearing loss or the risk of needing facial reconstruction. So let's break this down. Although in a harness those of you with modest to grand boobage are going to haver a lot of love dumplings flapping in the wind, uncontrolled these can give you more facial slaps than 13 rounds with Mike Tyson in the back of his Limo. This might work for the masochistic types out there but not the sadists. hearing Loss. Yes ladies nakid freefalling will result in you whistling on the way down. Zero velocity will achieve such high frequencies that your eardrums will puncture & dogs will howl for no apparent reason. As an addendum I would also add that those ladies of a certain age with labias like spaniels ears stand the risk of permanent stretching. Like Jack Nicholsons the Joker at best or a basking sharks mouth at worst. Remember ladies I'm here to help.

tolovetolaugh -> RE: Ask Uncle Niney. (11/25/2011 5:26:56 PM)
Dear Unky Niney, All my friends seem to enjoy hitting me. Am I just abusable, or are my friends assholes?

Ninebelowzero -> RE: Ask Uncle Niney. (11/25/2011 5:28:47 PM)
are your friends assholes what exactly? I feel your pain & confusion. quote: ORIGINAL: tolovetolaugh Dear Unky Niney, All my friends seem to enjoy hitting me. Am I just abusable, or are my friends assholes?

tolovetolaugh -> RE: Ask Uncle Niney. (11/25/2011 5:29:29 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Ninebelowzero are your friends assholes what exactly? I feel your pain & confusion. quote: ORIGINAL: tolovetolaugh Dear Unky Niney, All my friends seem to enjoy hitting me. Am I just abusable, or are my friends assholes? So do I!

MissKittyDeVine -> RE: Ask Uncle Niney. (11/25/2011 5:31:57 PM)
A strange man has been perving on my profile. He looks a lot like you. Do you have a twin or a doppleganger?

Ninebelowzero -> RE: Ask Uncle Niney. (11/25/2011 5:33:32 PM)
A strange man perving you say? I resemble that remark! quote: ORIGINAL: MissKittyDeVine A strange man has been perving on my profile. He looks a lot like you. Do you have a twin or a doppleganger?

LadyHibiscus -> RE: Ask Uncle Niney. (11/25/2011 5:50:26 PM)
Can you come over and make my webcam work?

Ninebelowzero -> RE: Ask Uncle Niney. (11/25/2011 5:53:39 PM)
Alas I am crap with electric voodoo shizzle.

Delilya -> RE: Ask Uncle Niney. (11/25/2011 6:15:10 PM)
How many studs do you think is acceptable for one stable?

RexDarcy -> RE: Ask Uncle Niney. (11/25/2011 6:55:50 PM)
One if that stud is Me.

DesFIP -> RE: Ask Uncle Niney. (11/25/2011 7:12:51 PM)
One, otherwise they spend all their time trying to make the others submit to them instead of doing what you want them to do.

MadAxeman -> RE: Ask Uncle Niney. (11/25/2011 9:25:44 PM)
Dear uncle 9. I have received a bunch of saucy pictures from beautiful and kinky women. It's not really a problem as such. Just wanted to tell someone.

MissImmortalPain -> RE: Ask Uncle Niney. (11/25/2011 9:51:57 PM)
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation? And... Like me, are you bothered by the fact that doctors call what they do "practice" ?

LanceHughes -> RE: Ask Uncle Niney. (11/25/2011 9:58:25 PM)
Dear "Uncle" Niney (btw, that's what the "friend" of my 4th grade Math teacher wanted me to call him - "Uncle" Jim.) Anyway - - - Dear "Uncle" Niney; Please tell us the story "behind" your username. Regards, Lance P.S. If we sit at your knee, head in your lap, does the story get "longer"?

MadAxeman -> RE: Ask Uncle Niney. (11/25/2011 10:25:33 PM)
Ninebelowzero are a kickarse mod band. They took their name from a Sonny Boy Williams song. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6X01NnAbyIg

tazzygirl -> RE: Ask Uncle Niney. (11/25/2011 10:33:50 PM)
Uncle Niney, what do you call a man who must brag about his pictorial conquests to all and sundry?

LanceHughes -> RE: Ask Uncle Niney. (11/25/2011 10:36:40 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Delilya How many studs do you think is acceptable for one stable? It depends on how many stalls you want to build. Holding each of those 2-by-4s in place will probably take, I don't know.... 8 or so nails. Oh, wait,... the question was "studs per stable." Again, depands on how elaborate the stable. It's basically useless to try and make walls by covering the studs. Inside the house, of cousre that's what you want to do..... Oh, wait.... THAT kind of studs.... Well, for my stable, I've always thought ... one handy-man, one house-keeper / butler / valet, CHAUFFER - required, prep cook, .... pool-man (if there's a pool) Stable size = $ at hand. Will check lotto tickets Sunday and let you know. LOL!

LanceHughes -> RE: Ask Uncle Niney. (11/25/2011 10:41:45 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: tazzygirl Uncle Niney, what do you call a man who must brag about his pictorial conquests to all and sundry? tazzy, tazzy, tazzy.. I am SO sorry to be the one to tell you that that "man who must brag about his pictorial conquests" was NOT speaking of photos when he was saying "to all and sundry," that over the week-end he must have had at least three good shooting sessions.... and those were NOT gun-oriented either, but you're getting closer - at least the right shape of what he used to shoot with. LOL!

tazzygirl -> RE: Ask Uncle Niney. (11/25/2011 10:52:48 PM)
Huh? I was speaking about MadAxe.

MadAxeman -> RE: Ask Uncle Niney. (11/26/2011 1:57:43 AM)
'Sir' will do.

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