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RE: Renaming slaves - 11/26/2011 11:09:31 PM   
MistressDarkArt


Posts: 5178
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SAMHAIN09

I've been wondering about this I mean is it common to give your slave a new name or to just address them as somthing else like a number or just slave?



I ask a new partner to pick a name that triggers him to feel submissive when I address him by it. Both Cabin Boy and 'boy' named themselves. 'S' is the first letter of another partner's given name. One sub fell into role as soon as he heard 'michael' or 'm' though his name was something completely different. Another picked 'pet'.

So while I could name my submissives, I would rather they do the work for me.

(in reply to SAMHAIN09)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Renaming slaves - 11/26/2011 11:25:47 PM   
WinsomeDefiance


Posts: 6719
Joined: 8/7/2007
Status: offline 		Hi Samhain,

When I was a collared slave, the Master I was collared to did give his slaves new names. I can tell you that for me, personally, I was not prepared for how very deeply I felt the loss of identity when I was told my knew name. I hated it. However, the intensity of emotion that I felt over something I'd taken for granted (my name/identity) was a valuable experience for me. Not an experience I'd welcome again, but not one I regret either.

I don't know how common this is, but most of the M/s relationships I've known personally - the slave was given a slave name or pet name. Only one, that I know of, actually legally changed her name. I have a friend that I met when we were both collared to the same household, and though she hasn't been Cinna in a long time, I and my kids still call her that.

It isn't so odd a question, just different strokes for different folks and all that.

I admire your quest for knowledge and interest in learning. Don't let yourself get discouraged.

WinD

(in reply to littlewonder)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Renaming slaves - 11/27/2011 12:29:43 AM   
Kirata


Posts: 15477
Joined: 2/11/2006
From: USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SAMHAIN09
quote:

ORIGINAL: JanahX

Have you ever looked into GOR?

It does interest me actually.


Well then, here's my view...

Your given name is used in many different situations that call for different responses. It has little real connection with who you are inside. It's just what people call you in all your different roles in life.

A slave name, on the other hand, is intimately associated with a core aspect of who you are. It is special. Your family and friends and co-workers don't call you that. They may not even know that you are a slave. But you know you are, and now you have a name.

I will normally call a slave by her given name in front of her family. But if I do use her slave name, she immediately knows what kind of response is expected. The sound of her slave name, itself, evokes it. And if questioned we just say it's a "nickname" I sometimes call her.

Among Goreans, the giving of a slave name is commonly part of taking a slave. "What is your name, girl?" For a slave being collared, the only possible answer is: "Whatever you wish, Master."

K.

< Message edited by Kirata -- 11/27/2011 12:37:43 AM >

(in reply to SAMHAIN09)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Renaming slaves - 11/27/2011 2:33:42 AM   
LillyBoPeep


Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
Status: offline 		That's very well expressed Kirata.

I don't have any experience with having my name legally changed, and I only know of onne girl, via the webbernetz, whose name was legally changed. But when I was with M, I rarely ever heard my "real" name. It didn't make me feel bad that he hardly used it. When we'd have gotten married, my last name would've changed, so I don't really see changinng your first name as all that odd, either. I imagine it's a tedious process at other times, though.

Like littlewonder said, changing your last name at marriage is a separation from family and the past, in a way - it's just so commonplace now, most people rarely even think about it. And obviously you can still have relationships with those family members, in spite of that separation, can't you? It doesn't have to be as negative and drastic as people tend to assume it is.

M wanted to created a little separation from mine because he thought I was stuck in negative patterns with some of them. Having his outside perspective helped me understand that he was right. It wasn't about dragging me off to a dark basement never to be seen again (and while I may not be Gorean, it's annoying to me that Gor is used towards hausboy in a disparaging way), he cared about and valued family, but also cared about what we were doing together, and where our own road might take us, even if it meant leaving family behind. If we'd moved where he wanted, neither of us would hardly see our relatives, but people move far away from home everyday.

Do these things suddenly become negative ideas just because M/s might also be involved?

< Message edited by LillyBoPeep -- 11/27/2011 2:46:17 AM >

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(in reply to Kirata)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Renaming slaves - 11/27/2011 2:38:56 AM   
stellauk


Posts: 1360
Status: offline 		Sorry to be a wet blanket here, but you've come here starting this thread on renaming slaves and another asking about books on BDSM.

You admit to not reading stuff due to skimming and whatnot.

Are you sure about all this?

I mean, it's not like you're going down to Ikea to pick up a couple of kitchen units, is it?

Oh please don't get me wrong, ask questions and stuff, that's what all this is here for.

But slaves are human beings, people. They require relationships. And that requires first hand experience and face to face contact.

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Usually when you have all the answers for something nobody is interested in listening.

(in reply to SAMHAIN09)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Renaming slaves - 11/27/2011 3:22:16 AM   
SuzeQ


Posts: 253
Joined: 10/16/2011
From: Under her wing
Status: offline 		We all call Heather "Fuckbunny", does that count?

(in reply to stellauk)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Renaming slaves - 11/27/2011 3:26:11 AM   
Ninebelowzero


Posts: 3134
Joined: 8/5/2011
Status: offline 		Works for me Suze.

Where is the old girl?
quote:

ORIGINAL: SuzeQ

We all call Heather "Fuckbunny", does that count?



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Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Renaming slaves - 11/27/2011 4:48:43 AM   
tazzygirl


Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
Status: offline
quote:

Among Goreans, the giving of a slave name is commonly part of taking a slave. "What is your name, girl?" For a slave being collared, the only possible answer is: "Whatever you wish, Master."

K.


QFT



_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to Kirata)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Renaming slaves - 11/27/2011 7:14:50 AM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline
quote:

hausboy


psst - same avatar, different person

(in reply to LillyBoPeep)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Renaming slaves - 11/27/2011 7:17:30 AM   
LillyBoPeep


Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
Status: offline 		Oh my, it would seem you are correct. Hardy har hay
SAMHAIN not hausboy.

_____________________________

Midwestern Girl

"Obey your Master." Metallica


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Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Renaming slaves - 11/27/2011 7:29:32 AM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline 		It's really confusing, I know!

(in reply to LillyBoPeep)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Renaming slaves - 11/27/2011 11:13:30 AM   
HeatherMcLeather


Posts: 2559
Joined: 5/21/2011
From: The dog house
Status: offline
quote:

Where is the old girl?
I'm still here. I'm just stealth posting.

< Message edited by HeatherMcLeather -- 11/27/2011 11:21:33 AM >

(in reply to Ninebelowzero)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Renaming slaves - 11/27/2011 11:30:59 AM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14442
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: JanahX
I am WICKED JEALOUS OF your slave that you are going to RENAME OR NUMBER.
Yeah, except he doesn't have one...

OP, I'm going to make the suggestion that instead of planning everything out for a sub/slave that you don't have yet, focus on finding a person you connect with and see how the relationship flows. You're making cookie cutter plans and looking to force a fit.


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The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to JanahX)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Renaming slaves - 11/27/2011 3:02:54 PM   
JanahX


Posts: 3443
Joined: 8/21/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Kirata


quote:

ORIGINAL: SAMHAIN09
quote:

ORIGINAL: JanahX

Have you ever looked into GOR?

It does interest me actually.


Well then, here's my view...

Your given name is used in many different situations that call for different responses. It has little real connection with who you are inside. It's just what people call you in all your different roles in life.

A slave name, on the other hand, is intimately associated with a core aspect of who you are. It is special. Your family and friends and co-workers don't call you that. They may not even know that you are a slave. But you know you are, and now you have a name.

I will normally call a slave by her given name in front of her family. But if I do use her slave name, she immediately knows what kind of response is expected. The sound of her slave name, itself, evokes it. And if questioned we just say it's a "nickname" I sometimes call her.

Among Goreans, the giving of a slave name is commonly part of taking a slave. "What is your name, girl?" For a slave being collared, the only possible answer is: "Whatever you wish, Master."

K.


exactly. Thats why I asked him. It just sounded to me, like this is the ave. that might work best for what he is looking for or has an interest in.

< Message edited by JanahX -- 11/27/2011 3:09:34 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Renaming slaves - 11/28/2011 9:20:04 PM   
MalcolmNathaniel


Posts: 1394
Joined: 9/20/2010
Status: offline 		I have always given my girls new names.

Always it's been from something I saw in their eyes.

I have not given them names that I expected them to introduce themselves as.  The names were just for us or other lifestyle people.

(in reply to JanahX)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Renaming slaves - 11/28/2011 10:20:17 PM   
LafayetteLady


Posts: 7683
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Northern New Jersey
Status: offline 		FR

I understand the concept behind the whole "new name" thing, but I don't agree with it many cases. I also don't believe an older adopted dog should get a new name unless there is a valid reason beyond the new owners not like the name or wanting to name the animal themselves. Personally, I wish kids came prenamed like cabbage patch dolls, because trying to name my son with my husband was so much of a hassle I finally gave up and let him name him whatever he wanted (there was one he couldn't use though). Having said that I have re-named I had. One was a dog named Amigo. Pretty sure he didn't know English and damn sure he didn't know his name. I called him Ox. It was the only thing he answered to. The other was my current cat. She was a local stray that the people in the complex fed (including me) and they called her "Mittens." I hated the name and she didn't respond to it. One day I looked at her, asked her what she thought of the name Socks. She looked at me and meowed in her rolling purr meow and she has been socks every since.

I'm going to be 48 this year, and it took me a long time to get used to my name and its variations. I'm not giving it up just because someone wants to give me a new one.

(in reply to MalcolmNathaniel)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Renaming slaves - 11/29/2011 1:49:23 AM   
LillyBoPeep


Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
Status: offline 		I'm not horribly attached to my name... most people don't say it very well, so I keep it shortened to minimize the damage. Haha
Actually a guy who can make it sound good rolling off his tongue gets MAJOR points with me.

_____________________________

Midwestern Girl

"Obey your Master." Metallica


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Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Renaming slaves - 11/29/2011 10:39:12 AM   
MasterSlaveLA


Posts: 3991
Status: offline 		 
Anything but SNOOKI, dammit!!!




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It's only kinky the first time!!!

(in reply to SAMHAIN09)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Renaming slaves - 11/29/2011 11:26:30 AM   
MariaB


Posts: 2969
Joined: 4/3/2007
Status: offline 		Personally I don't get the name change. I think its ok for nicks on fet sites or out in a fet club but behind four walls I want my sub to have the same name he was born with. I don't see his past as something to be left behind, I see it as a part of him and that part of him has an interesting past and a place where his personality developed into the beautiful mind it is today. Why would I want to leave all that behind?
In a fet club I am happy for my sub to have a nick name. If I am the only one who holds his real name then that makes his real name more special to me.
At the end of the day I am a realist. I don't like words like Mistress or Master either. If a sub needs to call me that then he is not the sub for me.

(in reply to MasterSlaveLA)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Renaming slaves - 11/30/2011 8:33:38 AM   
MadamDouceVoix


Posts: 17
Joined: 11/23/2011
Status: offline 		I use pet names as terms of endearment and very seldom address a sub by their given name unless we're being sexually intimate.
I'm not going to have someone legally change their name though...that's a little sodding ridiculous...lol.

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Always for the Love, sometimes for the money...
Voice to make you solid, blades to make you bleed...
Always for the Pleasure, never for the greed...

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Profile   Post #: 40
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