RE: Subs and boredom.

RE: Subs and boredom. (Full Version)

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Buzzzz -> RE: Subs and boredom. (11/30/2011 5:28:10 AM)
I am not a sub but I'll give my opinion anyway. When I start to get bored, I go to what I like to do ( my hobby/ex job) It is what I like to do and it is "in me:. The boredom is gone in an instant. Relationship-wise, any sub of mine isn't supposed to "entertain"me . The end result will be me being entertain, but it isn't the start of whatever activity we are about to do ( grocery shopping, walking or whatever we are doing at that time). Being in eachother's company is what I like ( and I hope she does too!!).

NuevaVida -> RE: Subs and boredom. (11/30/2011 6:36:41 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: myotherself I'm an extrovert submissive. I have friends and plenty of hobbies to keep me amused and entertained. And when we're together, Master and I keep each other entertained. This is pretty much the case with me. I'm rarely bored. I have great friends, a lot of various interests and activities, and happen to enjoy my own company. [:)] I wasn't bored when I was single, and I'm not bored now. And when we're together, it's an automatic dual entertainment situation. We love each others company, whether we're having fun or just sitting around doing nothing.

OsideGirl -> RE: Subs and boredom. (11/30/2011 7:17:42 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ilearn expect the dominant person in the relationship to keep them entertained. No, I don't.

Kana -> RE: Subs and boredom. (11/30/2011 7:22:41 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ilearn What is your boredom threshold? Most submissive people have low boredom thresholds and expect the dominant person in the relationship to keep them entertained. Oh glory me. I would pay hard cash to see her come up and say, "I'm bored, entertain me," Oh ko, you would be able to hear her vastly and abundantly entertained screams miles away.

MariaB -> RE: Subs and boredom. (11/30/2011 7:33:09 AM)
Perhaps its got something to do with being on a BDSM forum but I got the impression the op was pacifically meaning S/m and D/s boredom. The bottom who acts up so the top will spank her and if the top doesn't spank her she sits there pouting [8\|] I didn't know we were talking boredom from not having enough to do to pass the day or not enough friends coming round to visit.

stacey4u2luv -> RE: Subs and boredom. (11/30/2011 8:12:28 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Kana quote: ORIGINAL: ilearn What is your boredom threshold? Most submissive people have low boredom thresholds and expect the dominant person in the relationship to keep them entertained. Oh glory me. I would pay hard cash to see her come up and say, "I'm bored, entertain me," Oh ko, you would be able to hear her vastly and abundantly entertained screams miles away. ha ha i like that comment. i can just see it. lol Bottom line is i think a Dom/Sadist is entertaining himself when using a sub/masochist anyhow and a sub/masochist should have sufficient entertainment by being used. Really what would be boring maybe is being locked in a cage in a basement with nothing/nobody around for a great extended period of time. Corner time not boring as a subs mental abilities knows her Master is watching over her and anticipation is building up in her mind etc... But, even at that those locked in cages for extended periods of time i do not think they expect to be entertained.

anniezz338 -> RE: Subs and boredom. (11/30/2011 8:31:15 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ilearn What is your boredom threshold? Most submissive people have low boredom thresholds and expect the dominant person in the relationship to keep them entertained. lol...quite the opposite actually. i entertain Him the way He sees fit. Boredom in a relationship? my first thought is are needs being filled? Possible.

LaTigresse -> RE: Subs and boredom. (11/30/2011 8:34:22 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ilearn What is your boredom threshold? Most submissive people have low boredom thresholds and expect the dominant person in the relationship to keep them entertained. Is that a pretty much the standard fare? No. Not in MY house. I am not here to serve anyone by keeping them entertained or in any other way. As for bored.......I seriously don't have a clue about that mindset. To ME, only boring people get bored. I don't spend time with boring people.

Arienos -> RE: Subs and boredom. (11/30/2011 8:44:15 AM)
quote: What is your boredom threshold? Most submissive people have low boredom thresholds and expect the dominant person in the relationship to keep them entertained What troubles me is the use of the word “most” how is it one can define and under what standard do you establish most? I of course can only speak for myself but it is rare that I find enough time in any one day under any circumstance, to become bored. As a man or even as a submissive man I expect, no demand of myself to be challenged, creative and innovative during working hours and those precious times I have the opportunity to serve. For me boredom is simply not measuring up to my own expectations and that I will not allow.

MadamDouceVoix -> RE: Subs and boredom. (11/30/2011 8:45:44 AM)
I am easily bored but I have an armful or two of things to which I can refer to stimulate and pique my own interests. I don't fancy interacting with subs who cannot foster and sustain their own interests. I believe that often times people enter into our lifestyle with misconceptions and misplaced expectactions of each other's roles. I'm not in the business of being anyone's dancing monkey and if you get bored, I think the onus is largely on you to un-bore yourself. Now...if you crawled up to Me with doe eyes, full pouty lips and respectfully requested the pleasure of fucking me...I would happily oblige you...[:D] If you're sitting on your ass whining about not having something to do, I'll prob. chuck a cuff and dust you out of My way :P

NiceButMeanGirl -> RE: Subs and boredom. (11/30/2011 9:01:00 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ilearn What is your boredom threshold? Most submissive people have low boredom thresholds and expect the dominant person in the relationship to keep them entertained. Is that a pretty much the standard fare? I'm not sub, but I used to be and I was never bored. There was always something to do and I was doing it. Now, if I have a sub that says he's bored, he will find himself with plenty to do. Maybe not "fun" stuff, but there will be plenty to keep him occupied. There's always something to do. hehe NBMG

LillyBoPeep -> RE: Subs and boredom. (11/30/2011 9:08:16 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MariaB Perhaps its got something to do with being on a BDSM forum but I got the impression the op was pacifically meaning S/m and D/s boredom. The bottom who acts up so the top will spank her and if the top doesn't spank her she sits there pouting [8\|] I didn't know we were talking boredom from not having enough to do to pass the day or not enough friends coming round to visit. I think you're right, and there are those types... "He's not a good Dom cuz he won't play every day" types. :p I think that comes back to expectations like you said earlier. Maybe there was a lapse in communication when it came time to express those expectations, oooor the partners got together thinkinng they could change each other, or weren't really listening to each other... or... weren't really honest.

DesFIP -> RE: Subs and boredom. (11/30/2011 10:53:31 AM)
If I want play and we don't have a house full of kids, I ask him to do that. In general, I just pick up a book and I'm fine.

Lockit -> RE: Subs and boredom. (11/30/2011 11:24:36 AM)
I entertain children, by teaching them how to entertain themselves in certain things. I do not entertain adults. I interact with them. Its a two way street there. However, a part of me says... a bored submissive... needs something to do. Find something or I will. I don't mean to be glib about that, but really, they may need to expand a few things, whether it be personal interests or learning about themselves. Someone continuously bored... I would consider depressed, a possible health issue or simply needs to develop within.

LaTigresse -> RE: Subs and boredom. (11/30/2011 11:27:56 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LillyBoPeep quote: ORIGINAL: MariaB Perhaps its got something to do with being on a BDSM forum but I got the impression the op was pacifically meaning S/m and D/s boredom. The bottom who acts up so the top will spank her and if the top doesn't spank her she sits there pouting [8\|] I didn't know we were talking boredom from not having enough to do to pass the day or not enough friends coming round to visit. I think you're right, and there are those types... "He's not a good Dom cuz he won't play every day" types. :p I think that comes back to expectations like you said earlier. Maybe there was a lapse in communication when it came time to express those expectations, oooor the partners got together thinkinng they could change each other, or weren't really listening to each other... or... weren't really honest. Lilly, I think you really hit the nail on the head. To ME, it seems to be all about expectations. People go into a D/s or M/s relationship with unrealistic expectations. They don't think about the regular, real life, day to day, crapola that we ALL have to deal with to some degree or other. It isn't always just about the slap tickle.....sometimes you've gotta change a kid's shitty diaper, do the laundry, pay the bills and figure out what's for dinner.

agirl -> RE: Subs and boredom. (11/30/2011 11:52:00 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ilearn What is your boredom threshold? Most submissive people have low boredom thresholds and expect the dominant person in the relationship to keep them entertained. Is that a pretty much the standard fare? No idea. M/s bdsm wise there's not a chance in hell. I don't have to do a single thing to entertain M, just having me in the room is enough for him to entertain himself. I wish he was a bit more boring at times, I'd like to at least watch a film without sucking cock, getting whacked, tickled, pinched or generally razzed during the advert breaks. This is why I have a deep affection for the BBC, DVD's and memory sticks. agirl

littlewonder -> RE: Subs and boredom. (11/30/2011 12:20:08 PM)
ooohh...I so know the feeling agirl!

TheFireWithinMe -> RE: Subs and boredom. (11/30/2011 2:22:54 PM)
On the other side of things I WISH I knew the feeling <sighs>

agirl -> RE: Subs and boredom. (11/30/2011 2:36:22 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: littlewonder ooohh...I so know the feeling agirl! a kindred soul..........lol

ilearn -> RE: Subs and boredom. (11/30/2011 5:41:19 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: domincalifornia quote: ORIGINAL: ilearn What is your boredom threshold? Most submissive people have low boredom thresholds and expect the dominant person in the relationship to keep them entertained. Is that a pretty much the standard fare? If you have to keep someone constantly entertained, it's not a relationship -- it's a performance. If you just want to have occasional kinky fun with someone, that's no problem. If you truly want a relationship, which to me means spending time where you are talking about and doing things that are non-BDSM related, I think you need to enjoy each other's company while you're just being yourself. If you feel pressure to constantly be entertaining, that won't work/ But to answer your main question, I have never noticed that submissive people have a different boredom threshold than anyone else. That was insightful. I think I could honestly say that I tried too hard.

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