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RE: How to handle someone who doesn't get it? - 12/3/2011 1:10:23 AM

Ninebelowzero

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I hope she got her tits out for ya.

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RE: How to handle someone who doesn't get it? - 12/3/2011 6:56:40 AM

LadyHibiscus

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quote:

ORIGINAL: FrostedFlake

I mention I'm Qualified Submarines?
FF
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The former love of my life was a nuke!

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RE: I don't understand why a Domme got upset at my offe... - 12/3/2011 10:10:34 AM

LafayetteLady

Posts: 7683
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Northern New Jersey
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As the others said,

By your post, you determined a woman's profile was (terrible), and so decided to offer to rewrite it. Eventually she wrote back to you, insulted that you did such a thing. You didn't understand why.

Do you always behave so inappropriate in a social setting?

Do you think so highly of yourself that you think people are all anxious to get offers of "assistance" from you?

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RE: I don't understand why a Domme got upset at my offe... - 12/3/2011 1:24:25 PM

FrostedFlake

Posts: 3084
Joined: 3/4/2009
From: Centralia, Washington
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@Lady Hibiscus

I am sorry about the 'former' part.

Finding the person that is 'for you' is what we all dream of. (Edit : Most of us, anyway.) They say it is better to have loved and lost, but I wonder if that is really so.

And hope not to find out.
FF

< Message edited by FrostedFlake -- 12/3/2011 2:14:13 PM >

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RE: I don't understand why a Domme got upset at my offe... - 12/4/2011 3:08:27 AM

AriesHausdorff

Posts: 33
Joined: 7/11/2010
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Thank you all for your replies.

If it might have swung the responses in my favour if I'd have mentioned that the profile in question was to be written in german, my native language, or not is mostly a philosophical question I guess.

According to the overall feedback the fault is with me, so I shall need to decide more carefully on future issues.

Sincerely
Aries

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RE: I don't understand why a Domme got upset at my offe... - 12/4/2011 3:14:59 AM

AriesHausdorff

Posts: 33
Joined: 7/11/2010
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Addendum:

I was sure to had selected "Notify me via email" - Accordingly I was stumped when a rather large number of people flocked all over my profile two days later.
That's why I poked back for once.
The other thing is that I normally use BBS or NNTP boards, where there are no profiles.
So it took me right up to this threads finalization to realize that there is a very tight interconnection between the web-profiles and the forums for most.

Lastly, I consider it polite to welcome people that take the time to go for a peek, but, again, perception varies accordingly.

Sincerely
Aries

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RE: I don't understand why a Domme got upset at my offe... - 12/4/2011 3:23:37 AM

LadyPact

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I dont' think it would have swung the responses in your favor. From the sound of it, you still poked your nose in where it didn't belong. Then, once you had, you failed to follow through. Your original question asked about "shouldn't a Dominant....."? Well, doesn't the same apply? Shouldn't a Dominant follow through on what they say they are going to do? Obviously, you didn't or you wouldn't have received the follow up emails in the first place.

If all you were going to do was a simple translation to German, how long could that seriously take?

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RE: I don't understand why a Domme got upset at my offe... - 12/4/2011 5:13:42 AM

kalikshama

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quote:

If it might have swung the responses in my favour if I'd have mentioned that the profile in question was to be written in german, my native language, or not is mostly a philosophical question I guess.

Yes, I think your OP could have been better constructed. I think a lot of us focused on "bitchy" and "so-called."

Is this what happened - you offered to help her translate, she accepted, and then get angry with you because it took you a long time?

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RE: I don't understand why a Domme got upset at my offe... - 12/4/2011 5:20:14 AM

kalikshama

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Here's some admittedly unsolicited profile advice for you -

1. You've learned the lesson about triggering the spam filter - do remove that graphic and journal entry.

2. The picture of you is quite nice - I recommend making it your main profile picture.

3. The other pictures baffle me - you could create context by mentioning them at the bottom of your profile.

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Post #: 29

RE: I don't understand why a Domme got upset at my offe... - 12/4/2011 9:08:10 AM

AriesHausdorff

Posts: 33
Joined: 7/11/2010
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Dear Madam kalikshama,

as to 2) , well, that particular statement is one I by now sincerely disdain, as it belongs in the same category with "Lets just be friends" or other such classicals.
When I'd be interested in "quite nice" I'd just stick to plushies and cosy slippers and would stop carign about issues such as health and weight and education and all the lot, for a "quite nice" life can be achieved with a lot less effort than what I am doing.
As for 3) , you see, I replaced a lot of pictures. For some the context is / was in my profile. For the rest there is now no longer any reason for context, as they are just trying to be beautiful, and little else.
As for 1) I am currently trying but the system seems to ignore my actions. Maybe there is time needed to update the graphics.

As to you, LadyPact:
A three day period does not seem to be too hilariously long a time to do something beside the lines which is beyond somebody elses skills, so when as the next step pretty hilarious insults came into the inbox, little did I have then any further wish to proceed with my work and instead scrapped what I did so far.
Insulting people might be acceptable when it is part of enacting somebodies kinks and fetishes, but in everyday life abusive and abrasive useage of speech is considered impolite at least.

A question as to the state of things, or a mild reminder that there was some definite timeframe expected is one thing. A fit of tantrum is something different.
Translating a garbled german profile first into complete sentences and then translating it to english so that the implied wordplays remain is not totally trivial.

Otherwise I'd be puzzled why translators are earning quite a bit.

Sincerely
Aries

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RE: I don't understand why a Domme got upset at my offe... - 12/4/2011 10:44:38 AM

FrostedFlake

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I thought you said a Dom should be able to control himself.

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RE: I don't understand why a Domme got upset at my offe... - 12/5/2011 3:21:27 PM

AriesHausdorff

Posts: 33
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Should. Correct.
Failure to do so is not exclusive to myself or to others.
When it happens one should be aware of it. And not bask in it.

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RE: I don't understand why a Domme got upset at my offe... - 12/6/2011 12:40:19 PM

Succi

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Quite right. They should bask in OTHER people's failings and make them public like an asshole. Hear, hear.

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RE: How to handle someone who doesn't get it? - 12/7/2011 5:08:12 AM

MistressEsmeUK

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I'm late to this one but if you contacted me telling me you will rewrite what I have already written etc etc, I would take offence especially if I never asked for help in the first place. However the lady in question accepted so there is a part of this story that is clearly missing. She would not get pissed for no reason. Like someone previously said, maybe you said all that and never followed through or were just taking too long. As you only gave half a story how do you expect to get proper advice.

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RE: How to handle someone who doesn't get it? - 12/9/2011 2:57:29 AM

AriesHausdorff

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As I got a few mail in my Inbox I think I ought to clarify one more thing:
I do not criticize kalikshama, but do explain why I do not act according to her well meant and wise suggestions.
That, as a matter of fact, is part of what my OP was about:
Explaining or stating one's opinion is one thing. But a message reading like a incoherent babble of insults without any particular references is something difficult to react upon, as it is not even clear what in particular is being criticized.

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RE: How to handle someone who doesn't get it? - 12/9/2011 8:05:57 AM

orchid77

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One way to handle someone else...is to handle oneself first.

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RE: How to handle someone who doesn't get it? - 12/9/2011 8:52:56 AM

CBTinDALLAS

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You come off as being obnoxious and abusive...just sayin'

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RE: How to handle someone who doesn't get it? - 12/9/2011 11:02:07 AM

NiceButMeanGirl

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From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
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quote:

ORIGINAL: CBTinDALLAS

You come off as being obnoxious and abusive...just sayin'

This. ^^^

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RE: How to handle someone who doesn't get it? - 12/9/2011 3:29:03 PM

PeonForHer

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quote:

ORIGINAL: CBTinDALLAS

You come off as being obnoxious and abusive...just sayin'

True, but I've seen some femdoms' profiles that are bloody appalling. I can't recall the subject ever coming up here, but maybe it should. A thread started by someone who enjoys playing hopscotch on minefields more than I do, though. ;-)

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RE: How to handle someone who doesn't get it? - 12/9/2011 3:48:08 PM

MissToYouRedux

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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

quote:

ORIGINAL: CBTinDALLAS

You come off as being obnoxious and abusive...just sayin'

True, but I've seen some femdoms' profiles that are bloody appalling...