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new sub female looking for help - 12/18/2011 4:30:01 PM   
chocolateeyes46


Posts: 1
Joined: 12/18/2011
Status: offline 		I am currently under consideration by a very worthy dom and am here to learn more about the D/s lifestyle and where this leads me (I am totally new). I have no interest in talking to any men, only females to get their advice, answer questions and gain perspective from their point of view. Any help you would offer?

< Message edited by chocolateeyes46 -- 12/18/2011 4:42:02 PM >
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: new sub female looking for help - 12/18/2011 4:31:20 PM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline 		lol, I'm a guy, so I wont even bother wishing you an insincere good luck.

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to chocolateeyes46)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: new sub female looking for help - 12/18/2011 4:38:48 PM   
DaddySatyr


Posts: 9381
Joined: 8/29/2011
From: Pittston, Pennsyltucky
Status: offline 		Funny, there may be some people that are vagina-deficient that might have some good ideas for you.

Here's my suggestion: Discrediting half of the population limits your potential. Welcome.



Peace and comfort,



Michael

< Message edited by DaddySatyr -- 12/18/2011 4:45:33 PM >

_____________________________

A Stone in My Shoe

Screen captures (and pissing on shadows) still RULE! Ya feel me?

"For that which I love, I will do horrible things"

(in reply to mnottertail)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: new sub female looking for help - 12/18/2011 4:45:16 PM   
poise


Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: chocolateeyes46

I am currently under consideration by a very worthy dom and am here to learn more about the D/s lifestyle and where this leads me (I am totally new).
I have no interest in talking to any men, only females to get their advise, answer questions and gain perspective from their point of view. Any help you would offer?


I would first ask you how you can determine his worth as a dominant if you are so very new
to the lifestyle. Have you met him in person? Do you know how he treats his mother, his children,
or animals?

I would also caution you to not assume that being under consideration is some lofty position,
as it often means someone has their hands in quite a few pieces of pie already, and use that
term as a way to keep them all eagerly awaiting his next word.
Remember, he is also under your consideration until you decide to give him authority over you.
He has to earn that right just as much as you do.

This site is a great place to interact with others and learn more not only about the lifestyle, but
also about yourself and what you may want out of it. I hope you enjoy your time here.


_____________________________

When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to chocolateeyes46)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: new sub female looking for help - 12/18/2011 4:48:19 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		Wonder if her worthy dominant foresaw the reality she would find here, especially from the females.

No offense to the men... but if her dom was afraid of someone domly stealing her away... he should now know that he had more to fear from the females. lol Lesson for them both.


_____________________________

No matter how old a woman gets, some men will think she was born yesterday! ROFL... I love this place!


(in reply to poise)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: new sub female looking for help - 12/18/2011 4:51:30 PM   
DaddySatyr


Posts: 9381
Joined: 8/29/2011
From: Pittston, Pennsyltucky
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: poise

Do you know how he treats his mother, his children, or animals?



Wow! I'm screwed! LOL I haven't talked to my mom in 11 years, My boys are all grown (and it's the old story of my opening line in every phone conversation being: You never call me, anymore) and I hate rats!



Peace and comfort,



Michael

_____________________________

A Stone in My Shoe

Screen captures (and pissing on shadows) still RULE! Ya feel me?

"For that which I love, I will do horrible things"

(in reply to poise)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: new sub female looking for help - 12/18/2011 4:54:18 PM   
tazzygirl


Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: chocolateeyes46

I am currently under consideration by a very worthy dom and am here to learn more about the D/s lifestyle and where this leads me (I am totally new). I have no interest in talking to any men, only females to get their advice, answer questions and gain perspective from their point of view. Any help you would offer?


Im curious as to why you would discount the advice of men. Many who post to these threads have partners and arent looking for another. Many of the women here, myself included, value their opinions. Quite a few are flirts, but they do respect the property of others.

Btw, I miss Charlotte. Great city!

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to chocolateeyes46)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: new sub female looking for help - 12/18/2011 4:54:42 PM   
searching4mysir


Posts: 2757
Joined: 6/16/2011
Status: offline 		FR

Dear OP,

Being "under consideration" is BS. Sorry, but it is true. It is the equivalent of dating in the vanilla world. There is no commitment on his part, so frankly there shouldn't be on yours either. Test him just as much as he tests you. Don't give in to sub frenzy and just take the first guy that seems to take a liking to you. Watch his feet, not his lips (actions speak louder than words).

You are new to the lifestyle? Pick up a copy of "The Loving Dominant" or "Screw the Roses".

(in reply to Lockit)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: new sub female looking for help - 12/18/2011 4:57:20 PM   
poise


Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DaddySatyr


quote:

ORIGINAL: poise

Do you know how he treats his mother, his children, or animals?



Wow! I'm screwed! LOL I haven't talked to my mom in 11 years, My boys are all grown (and it's the old story of my opening line in every phone conversation being: You never call me, anymore) and I hate rats!



Peace and comfort,



Michael


It's never too late. :)

_____________________________

When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to DaddySatyr)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: new sub female looking for help - 12/18/2011 4:59:21 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline

_____________________________

No matter how old a woman gets, some men will think she was born yesterday! ROFL... I love this place!


(in reply to poise)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: new sub female looking for help - 12/18/2011 5:31:48 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline 		Your profile says that not only do you not wish to talk to men, you don't want to talk with Dommes either.

That said, I disagree with searching4mysir about being under consideration.  To me, it's analogous to living together prior to marriage - a trial prior to real commitment.  Searching4mysir may have been alluding to the fact that some "Doms" will place women under consideration to keep them off the market while they themselves play the field.

I'd advise you to read up in this forum and the Ask a Master forum, as well as General BDSM.  Follow the discussions.  If you have any questions, I'd advise you going through your Dom to get his take. The basic situation is that what you and your Dom agree upon, is what really matters.  However, make sure he knows what he's doing if he tries alcohol enemas, fire play, whips, or other things that require a high level of skill to keep safe.

Welcome to the lifestyle.


_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to Lockit)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: new sub female looking for help - 12/18/2011 5:52:24 PM   
poise


Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline 		I just got a delightful email from the OP, and she assures me, with a few examples, that this man has good intentions.
She also addressed the other concerns regarding isolating her interactions with just female submissives, but as she spends
more time here on the boards, she will come to realize that isnt an easy task, as all of us post just about anywhere, regardless of gender.

Welcome again to the message boards, chocolateeyes, I'm sure you will enjoy it here.

_____________________________

When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: new sub female looking for help - 12/18/2011 6:23:01 PM   
tazzygirl


Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
Status: offline 		Good to hear poise. Seems a little pointless to start a discussion then not join in.

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to poise)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: new sub female looking for help - 12/18/2011 6:35:23 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		LOL Ridiculous. Just fucking ridiculous.

_____________________________

No matter how old a woman gets, some men will think she was born yesterday! ROFL... I love this place!


(in reply to tazzygirl)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: new sub female looking for help - 12/18/2011 6:52:32 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: poise

I just got a delightful email from the OP, and she assures me, with a few examples, that this man has good intentions.
She also addressed the other concerns regarding isolating her interactions with just female submissives, but as she spends
more time here on the boards, she will come to realize that isnt an easy task, as all of us post just about anywhere, regardless of anything whatsoever.

Welcome again to the message boards, chocolateeyes, I'm sure you will enjoy it here.


Fixed.


_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to poise)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: new sub female looking for help - 12/18/2011 7:08:02 PM   
searching4mysir


Posts: 2757
Joined: 6/16/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

To me, it's analogous to living together prior to marriage - a trial prior to real commitment. 




DS - I don't live with anyone without a real commitment. But I agree, it is more or less used to take someone off the market while still "dipping their pen in any well that will let them".

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: new sub female looking for help - 12/18/2011 7:16:36 PM   
EmilyRocks


Posts: 357
Joined: 5/5/2011
Status: offline
quote:

That said, I disagree with searching4mysir about being under consideration.  To me, it's analogous to living together prior to marriage
I'm sorry, you're usually very sensible, but that was a stupid thing to say. Really, really, really stupid.

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: new sub female looking for help - 12/18/2011 9:29:14 PM   
LafayetteLady


Posts: 7683
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Northern New Jersey
Status: offline 		Certainly, it is nice to know it would seem her potential dominant has decent intentions, but it also sounds as though she posted here, so people could respond and she could pick and choose who she wanted to respond to through an email.

Not the most productive use of the boards to say the least.  It also means that a good number of people might not respond at all to her posts if she is never going to respond in the thread.

(in reply to poise)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: new sub female looking for help - 12/18/2011 10:31:48 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		How many men pose as women on this site? Lots. I see no reason why an adult cannot communicate with anyone and handle whatever might happen. Isolating submissive women... who can take care of themselves... still seems a little odd to me. You don't even know that you are talking to a submissive woman.

That may not be what is happening here... but can you see where the questions might come up?

An adult should be able to communicate with people in general on the boards... and then be able to handle themselves in an adult world... whether they are new to something or not. Submissives are not lost children that need to be guided. Coming in wanting help to see something the way another submissive views it... may be totally wrong for someone else. Why would a dom send someone out to learn about things from strangers that could give information he would totally reject? Hell, I would be all over teaching my way and view and then saying... go the boards.. read some things and would be with them and review it all... but isolate other submissives? I think not. I can see where learning how other submissives feel about things is of worth... one can search the boards and can also make some friends.. but walking in the door... expecting to call some shots on how, with whom and all that....

Maybe I am jaded or expect a lot... but something just stinks to high heaven to me about this.

< Message edited by Lockit -- 12/18/2011 10:57:38 PM >

_____________________________

No matter how old a woman gets, some men will think she was born yesterday! ROFL... I love this place!


(in reply to LafayetteLady)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: new sub female looking for help - 12/18/2011 11:05:27 PM   
FrostedFlake


Posts: 3084
Joined: 3/4/2009
From: Centralia, Washington
Status: offline
quote:

ChocolateEyes
I have no interest in talking to any men, only females to get their advice, answer questions and gain perspective from their point of view.


Hmmmm...

quote:

Lockit
How many men pose as women on this site? Lots.


Hmmm...

Checking...DAMN! Well, see you in the funny papers!

(in reply to Lockit)
Profile   Post #: 20
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