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ORIGINAL: femdomlover72

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I could also never be slave to someone who sees me as "less" than them, or someone who doesn't find my thoughts, feelings, and well-being (physical and mental) to be of utmost importance. Nor could I be slave to someone if I was not also his lover.

I respect your views RaspberryLemon, but I subscribe to a different belief in D/S. I need to believe that the Mistress I serve is better than me. Call it what you want, maybe it is a limitation of my character, but She has to be better, and most importantly, She has to relish domination. For me the sex is not important. I won't lie and say that it hasn't crossed my mind, but it wouldn't be the same. She is above me, and serving Her brings its own reward

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ORIGINAL: Lockit
Maybe in the findom world this is true... but anyone that is lifestyle... god, I hate these titles, but there isn't any other way of explaining it... to allow a submissive to be so insecure that he had to be the best because he could be replaced, rather than be the best for his domina and the relationship... is cruel and doesn't work towards or sustain trust.

Your profile is hidden so I cannot know where you might be coming from in this, but other than the op whom has made his unwise choice, I sure don't want other male submissives to believe that this is what they must do for the reason you gave. Your reasoning in my opinion is unacceptable.

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ORIGINAL: femdomlover72

That's just it. I don't believe there has to be. She is as true a Domme as any who call themselves as lifestyle. She is both pro and lifestyle. She lives it everyday. I have seen it and I know it is not just an act. I don't believe or expect that it must be this way for every Femdom relationship, but serving such a Mistress is every bit as real and valid as serving someone who is stuck on the title "lifestyle".

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ORIGINAL: femdomlover72

I am experiencing something I have dreamed of my entire adult life. I am a live in slave to one of the most gorgeous Dommes anywhere. For the sake of discretion I won't mention Her name, unless She gives me permission. I don't really care if people believe this post or not. I am living it, it is so real now, it doesn't matter to me what others think. She regularly humiliates me in front of Her roomates. I am made to serve in front of Her lover, Her friends, anyone who happens to be in the house. It is very different from what I imagined, and so like what I imagined. It is far more intense, and deep than I thought it would be. It runs way beyond fantasy, and fetish. I have served Her for over a year, but this has changed all the dynamics of our relationship.

Some things hurt, like being shown what my place is in Her eyes. Yesterday, I noticed Her doing something with strangers she said she would not do, and never with me. Nothing sexual or BDSM related, but significant to me just the same. I asked her about it because it hurt my feelings. She blasted me, and made it very clear that I was beneath Her and that it did not matter what I felt or thought. That hurts, but I accept it. She made it very clear what my place was, what my role was. I realize now that I was wrong. The rules, what She says, and does, can change at anytime, and even contradict what She says and I must accept that if I am to be Her slave. I thought about it, and I accepted it because I do want to be Her slave, more than anything in life. I know, more than ever now, that I am simply Her slave, meant to serve and amuse Her at Her whim. She is not overly concerned with my feelings, and does not want to talk about them most of the time. Some of the realities of being a real time live in slave can be painful, but I am finding that I am willing to accept them for the privilege of serving Her.

Maybe you believe me, maybe you don't, I just need an outlet to express what I am going through. Even though I have been Her slave for over a year now I am still new to many things. There are so many things that you don't consider when you dream about being a personal slave. Be careful what you wish for, in my case I got it. More than I ever dreamed possible, and I love it, even when it hurts.

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So without further comment, I give you.... go to her web site, go to reviews, click on here in the last paragraph and that will take you to where it says...

massage VIP only massage quality VIP only sex VIP only s&m VIP only blow job VIP only cum in mouth VIP only touch pussy VIP only lick pussy VIP only kiss VIP only anal VIP only two girl action VIP only will bring second provider VIP only more than one guy at a time VIP only full, no-rush session VIP only multiple pops allowed VIP only rimming VIP only

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ORIGINAL: LizDeluxe

The supply and demand numbers are not in favor of the submissive male. That is simple mathematics - not my personal opinion.

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ORIGINAL: femdomlover72

No, at first I paid for sessions with Her, but no longer. She owns me completely, all my money already belongs to Her. I am trying to be completely submissive to Her. Isn't that what all slaves should do for their Dommes/Doms? Trust has always been an issue for Me. However, I can say this. I have been completely at Her mercy several times. She could have vanished and left me stranded out of state many times, but never did. She has always kept me around. I am not wealthy, She has slaves that make much more money than me, I am not ugly, but I am not really all that attractive either. I ask myself many times why does she keep me around if she doesn't care for me? There must be a reason why she does keep me. I have asked her but she never answered. I used to be so scared She was gonna clean out my bank account and vanish. She never has. Once She was late in coming to get me to take me to the bus station so I could return home and catch a flight for a business trip. She drove 16 hours so I could make that flight, and she did not have to do that. THat spoke volumes to me. She does tell me things sometimes that makes me feel very good. She once told me that if she ever married that the person would be marrying both of us. That made me feel so wonderful. She told me just 2 weeks agon that I was more than a slave, but a friend as well. Contrast those things with Her recent treatment of me and it doesn't add up. I struggle with trusting Her alot, but I figure that is my own shortcoming, and that after all we have been through I should trust Her without question. Despite the fact that She doesn't want to talk about Her feelings, I feel She shows them indirectly. I don't think that is healthy, and I am trying to break through that barrier. It is not easy now that She says "Speak only when spoken to", but I hope that is just a phase.

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In a certain sense, that's a thrilling discovery, isn't it? :-) It was for me because it told me, in no uncertain terms, that what I was experiencing was real. Real enslavement, not a role-play pretense where I get all my fantasies fulfilled. Painful, difficult, but deeply inspiring reality is so much better than dull pleasant fantasies where everything goes our own way. Instead, things are going her way and you must simply comply. The rarity of your relationship, in my eyes, is not the beauty of your mistress, however stunning she may be, it's in her Reality.

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By "add up" do you mean things are not fair? Or do you mean something is confusing you?

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Well, to tell you the truth, there is sincere honest questioning and then there is "my evil mistress won't do things my way and I will show her with my questions how unfair she’s being to me."

Do you see what I mean? Which one of these is you?

Of course, if she doesn't want you doing any sort of questioning then you have your answer. If you really care about serving her above all else, then just don't ask questions. Why? For the simple reason that it pleases her when you do not.

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The truth as I have experienced it is this: if you are enslaved to the right person, someone who really knows how to master you, you can be replaced easily because such a person is very strong and committed to being a mistress/master. They do not allow affection or other emotional ties to prevent them from doing the right thing. And sadly, sometimes the right thing to do with a slave is to dismiss them. These aren’t romantic relationships in the conventional sense, you know.

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Now let me address this from the other perspective. If she is the one who took on a new lover that you intentionally introduced her to with her pleasure in mind, then why do you feel so bad? When a new person comes into somebody’s life, they initially need a lot of attention and time. The relationship-establishment period is very intense, it takes a while. In the early days, it is very vulnerable and needs a lot of care and attention. Unfortunately, that means that other slaves or relationships must be put on a back burner for a while, but it doesn’t sound like she’s abandoned you completely. She may get some cruel pleasure from making you wait knowing she is spending time with the new person, but that’s one of the reasons you love her and love this relationship, isn’t it? Because you cannot influence her? Patience is needed. Think of how happy and involved she is in getting to know the new person, and, if they are to be a slave, training them. Doesn’t that give you a warm glow?

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I seriously don't understand why this bothers you. It singles you out as something very special. Who else would she do this to except someone she completely controlled? Think of the pleasure and the pride it likely brings her to treat you in this fashion. Think of how it makes her happy; not about how it makes you unhappy. Why do you wish to be on the same level with a mere vanilla lover? Do you think that for a really dominant woman a vanilla relationship is anywhere near as satisfying as owning a slave? Her not allowing that sort of exchange with you, as hard as it may be at times, underlines how thoroughly she regards you as her actual property.

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When a master or mistress can relax around you that much and just be themselves it means something very good about the relationship. It means she's very comfortable with you, she doesn't feel like she has to suck up to you or flatter you or treat you like she might a client.

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ORIGINAL: femdomlover72

She is a hard person, and She does not cling to emotional attachments.

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Do you mean she has no emotional attachments to anyone? To me, this screams sociopathic tendancies and unhealthy.

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ORIGINAL: femdomlover72

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Do you mean she has no emotional attachments to anyone? To me, this screams sociopathic tendancies and unhealthy.

No, that is not what I mean. What I mean is that She is not going to waste time sorrowing over a failed relationship.

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Once She was late in coming to get me to take me to the bus station so I could return home and catch a flight for a business trip. She drove 16 hours so I could make that flight, and she did not have to do that.