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The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 5/31/2006 9:53:54 AM

Reflectivesoul

Posts: 1777
Joined: 4/25/2006
Status: offline

I thought I had seen it all so far in e-mails I have recieved and I was SOOOOOOO wrong lol. This one just takes the cake... I'm not going to name names but I am going to post the e-mail and my reply....

For those of you that have gotten this type of e-mail ( I know theres a lot ) but is it really a wonder why people stop responding to messages sheesh... maybe the ones bitching that people dont reply should stop sending messages like this :

<deleted>

My reply... :

quote:

( this is his entire profile)
Iam an alpha male seeking a ltr w/ a naturally submissive fenale who is not a brat. Please be disease and drug free and serious about a real time power exchange. Iam a professional educated male and dont have the time nor desire to just meet anyone; please be real, clean, loyal, and open minded.

Do you not see a problem with your own profile? and why in the hell would you think that just because you jump in my e-mail box professing to be a Dominant that I'm going to just hand over my information... are you dumb or just stupid?

[Mod Note: email deleted. Please don't paste email you have received into forum posts]

< Message edited by ModeratorEleven -- 5/31/2006 1:34:35 PM >

_____________________________

ooooo..I bet THATS gonna leave a mark!!!!

Equal opportunity pisser on-er ... heh..

Gimme some crayons, I want color and I want it now DAMNIT!

Post #: 1

RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 5/31/2006 10:05:06 AM

lisa1978

Posts: 224
Joined: 5/19/2006
From: Kansas City
Status: offline

You do not now the answer to that? It is because until you talk to him how will you ever know if he is not the perfect person for you! After all he is the only real person on the site and if you are not prepared to talk to him how will you ever find someone on here.

LOL

_____________________________

It hurts sometimes more than we can bear. If we could live without passion, maybe we'd know some kind of peace. But we would be hollow. Empty rooms, shuttered and dank. Without passion, we'd be truly dead.

(in reply to Reflectivesoul)

Post #: 2

RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 5/31/2006 10:05:33 AM

NCSilverWolfs

Posts: 6
Joined: 5/31/2006
Status: offline

LMAO... before deleting other name a few minutes ago.... I had one just like that...he or his buddies sure get around

_____________________________

Wisdom is knowing what to do next, Skill is knowing how to do it, and Virtue is doing it.

(in reply to Reflectivesoul)

Post #: 3

RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 5/31/2006 10:05:40 AM

Reflectivesoul

Posts: 1777
Joined: 4/25/2006
Status: offline

ok... now I know I am not the only one that has gotten e-mail like this..... pfffttt lol

please be my guest to share your "favorite" stupid e-mails

<edited to say.....> lisa!! lol omg rolls... thats too funny...

NCSilverWolfs.... they should come with warning labels ... "Warning idiot mail enclosed" or something

< Message edited by Reflectivesoul -- 5/31/2006 10:08:22 AM >

_____________________________

ooooo..I bet THATS gonna leave a mark!!!!

Equal opportunity pisser on-er ... heh..

Gimme some crayons, I want color and I want it now DAMNIT!

(in reply to Reflectivesoul)

Post #: 4

RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 5/31/2006 10:07:16 AM

Dustyn

Posts: 1044
Joined: 4/5/2006
Status: offline

I don't get emails on this site, per se, but I have gotten ads in my inbox for the pill and breast pumps... being male, these just aren't much use to me...

_____________________________

Mother is the name for God on the lips and hearts of all children.

Murderer?! Murderer! Let me tell you something about murder. It's fun; it's easy; you gonna learn ALL about it. - Tin Tin

Can you be more amusing?

(in reply to Reflectivesoul)

Post #: 5

RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 5/31/2006 10:11:36 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

Well I agree that having a spotless profile is something to strive for, having a single typo doesn't negate being an intelligent person. My ex master was a "true" genius in many ways, but couldn't type to save his life.

The issue is more than he sent a fairly vague form trolling letter. However, maybe he actually got someone's number out of it and started talking?

Considering some of the emails people get, I'd say this is pretty darn tame and generic.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to Reflectivesoul)

Post #: 6

RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 5/31/2006 10:14:08 AM

MyCaptainsPet

Posts: 219
Joined: 1/22/2006
Status: offline

i feel very let down because i don't get any stupid emails.. i mean, i've gotten the one liners "hi, how are you " things.. but never anything else... LOL maybe my profile is just TOO perfect???

*smirks*

_____________________________

SLRN 896-781-943

(in reply to Reflectivesoul)

Post #: 7

RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 5/31/2006 10:14:45 AM

Reflectivesoul

Posts: 1777
Joined: 4/25/2006
Status: offline

if he did manage to get someones number from the lack of information in the profile and the tactis used, I'd say the person giving up the information needs their head examined....

_____________________________

ooooo..I bet THATS gonna leave a mark!!!!

Equal opportunity pisser on-er ... heh..

Gimme some crayons, I want color and I want it now DAMNIT!

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 8

RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 5/31/2006 10:15:17 AM

zumala

Posts: 1121
Joined: 6/16/2005
Status: offline

*shrugs* Most of the messages I get here are of that ilk. Currently I have someone who wants me to 'prove' I'm really a submissive female and not a faker by showing a second picture. Now, I ask you... When you're dealing with a media like the internet, how on earth is a second photo going to prove anything at all? What is to prevent a faker from having more than one photo of the same girl?

I told him that I can tell fakers from real people through conversation over time. He seems to think that's a waste of time. Oh well.

zuma

(in reply to Dustyn)

Post #: 9

RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 5/31/2006 10:15:26 AM

cariad

Posts: 943
Joined: 9/25/2004
From: Calgary, Alberta
Status: offline

oh oh oh.............girl's favorite email is: "Marry Me?"

good Goddess do they think girl is so stupid to say ok no prob sure when are You willing to relocate? ohhhhhhhhhhh boy just when she thought she had thought she saw it all that came to her inbox a while back LOL

_____________________________

The Path To Being A Good slave Takes Hard Work, A Willingness To Learn, Ability To Take Criticism and the Ability To Take Punishments Well. i Am Still Learning So Please Be Patient With me, As i Walk the Path to Being A good slave. SLRN: 742 958 000

(in reply to Dustyn)

Post #: 10

RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 5/31/2006 10:15:45 AM

Reflectivesoul

Posts: 1777
Joined: 4/25/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MyCaptainsPet

i feel very let down because i don't get any stupid emails.. i mean, i've gotten the one liners "hi, how are you " things.. but never anything else... LOL maybe my profile is just TOO perfect???

*smirks*

*raises hand n bounces around* oh oh pick me pick me... I can send you a good stupid e-mail lol lol lol

_____________________________

ooooo..I bet THATS gonna leave a mark!!!!

Equal opportunity pisser on-er ... heh..

Gimme some crayons, I want color and I want it now DAMNIT!

(in reply to MyCaptainsPet)

Post #: 11

RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 5/31/2006 10:36:06 AM

losttreasure

Posts: 875
Joined: 12/17/2005
Status: offline

I've received a few interesting emails... got the "Marry me" one as well. While the one liners are usually amusing, it's often the intent behind the message that gets me to wondering. One of my favorite tactics is the message that closes with, "if you are REAL and a TRUE submissive, you will respond to me right away". Of course, if I don't, it just confirms to him that I'm not. *laughs* Blackmail isn't a very effective come-on with me.

(in reply to Reflectivesoul)

Post #: 12

RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 5/31/2006 10:40:12 AM

Reflectivesoul

Posts: 1777
Joined: 4/25/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: losttreasure

I've received a few interesting emails... got the "Marry me" one as well. While the one liners are usually amusing, it's often the intent behind the message that gets me to wondering. One of my favorite tactics is the message that closes with, "if you are REAL and a TRUE submissive, you will respond to me right away". Of course, if I don't, it just confirms to him that I'm not. *laughs* Blackmail isn't a very effective come-on with me.

* runs off to muh e-mail *

I got something like that a while back... dont remember if I deleted it or kept it to laugh at.... hmmm lets see lol brb

ok I cant find the " if you're real" one but I just loooved this one *eye roll*

<deleted>

this one was good too... and I edited it to take out the given e-mail addy ...

<deleted>

[Mod Note: email deleted. Please don't paste email you have received into forum posts]

< Message edited by ModeratorEleven -- 5/31/2006 1:36:38 PM >

_____________________________

ooooo..I bet THATS gonna leave a mark!!!!

Equal opportunity pisser on-er ... heh..

Gimme some crayons, I want color and I want it now DAMNIT!

(in reply to losttreasure)

Post #: 13

RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 5/31/2006 10:42:38 AM

wytchywoman

Posts: 510
Joined: 2/27/2006
From: Southeastern Michigan
Status: offline

quote:

please be my guest to share your "favorite" stupid e-mails

I just got this one today. I can't say it's my favorite, but it's the most recent "what cay I say " one that I've received:

<deleted>

He obviously didn't read my profile. Not even the threat of a virtual hex deterred him.

[Mod Note: email deleted. Please don't paste email you have received into forum posts]

< Message edited by ModeratorEleven -- 5/31/2006 1:37:05 PM >

_____________________________

Nothing is at last sacred but the integrity of your own mind.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

(in reply to Reflectivesoul)

Post #: 14

RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 5/31/2006 10:46:51 AM

MsMacComb

Posts: 808
Joined: 3/30/2005
From: My Mothers womb.
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: wytchywoman
"I would love to enjoy you for an evening and willing to help you financially if you are interested. I am a sadist and would love to use you for one night. I am serious, could be very good for you financially if you are interested lets talk."

(That sounds like the same ad I ran when I hired my maid.

)

_____________________________

Not looking for anyone for anything, any time.

(in reply to wytchywoman)

Post #: 15

RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 5/31/2006 10:53:46 AM

Emperor1956

Posts: 2370
Joined: 11/7/2005
Status: offline

For those of you poor submissives who lack definitive junk email (and for those of you who just get a kick out of it), worry no more:

Dear [insert your submissive, snively, self here]:

I read your profile on CollarMe and I found your profile unique, notwithstanding I am sending this to 186 other women who caught my eye TODAY. I am the ONE TRUE DOMINONT MASTER on this computer board and I have selected YOU to be MY slave.

To show ME your true submission, you will fall to your nees NOW, and MASTRUBRATE while calling out MY name (which you will find at the foot of this message). I WILL WAIT FOR YOU TO CUM.

... ... ...

OK Now that we have that done. I hope it was as good for you as it was FOR ME. I am a well educated single male who is currently evaluating MY career options as the POST OFFICE has recently had a riduction in forze. I AM TOTALLY AND COMPLETELY DOMINANT except for that 14 year marriage to the EXBITCH WIFE which we won't talk about. I can relocate so long as I tell MY mom a bit before I move so she can rent out the guest room again. Wait...let me clean off the keyboard.

**** squick ****

OK. NOW SEND ME YOUR NAKED PICTURES AND YOUR PHONE NUMBER TO PROVE YOU ARE A TRUE SUBMISSIVE. IF YOU DO NOT DO THIS IMMEDIATELY YOU ARE A PLAYER AND A PHONEY WHO DOES NOT UNDERSTAND TRUE SUBMISSION.

(EDITED: I FORGOT THIS): You will NEVER tell ME you have limits. YOU ARE A SUBMISSIVE I AM MASTRER! Subs have NO Limits. Do not insult ME by claiming to have them.

[optional paragraph for those who state in their profile the want only a monogamous relationship] you may be monogamous. I will NOT because I am MASTRER and I have needs and desires you can not handle. After we have been together 3 weeks I expect you to get a hot sub girlfriend for ME too.

[Optional paragraph for women who have stated that they want a Dominant near their age]. you are mistaken in not seeking a MAN who is older and wiser as WE MAKE THE BEST LOVERS AND THE ONLY TRUE DOMS. YES I am almost 50 and you are 19, but I assure you ONLY I CAN teach you what real DOMINATS is. DO NOT BE WORRIED THAT I COULD BE YOUR FATHER. I'm not. But I have a daughter your age....and that thought should leave you wide awake and scared tonight.

I EXPECT MY SUBMISSIVE TO SUPPORT ME IN EVERY WAY. Send ME your credit card numbers, now.

Oh, and be disease free, and I only play SSC.

FONDLY, YOUR ONE TRUE MASTER. <--- my real name. My parents KNEW I was the ONE.
_______________

God I have to get some work done *GRIN* -- E.

< Message edited by Emperor1956 -- 5/31/2006 11:07:09 AM >

_____________________________

"When you wake up, Pooh," said Piglet, "what's the first thing you say?"
"What's for breakfast? What do you say, Piglet?"
"I say, I wonder what's going to happen exciting today?"
Pooh nodded thoughtfully.
"It's the same thing," he said.

(in reply to Reflectivesoul)

Post #: 16

RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 5/31/2006 10:57:39 AM

impishlilhellcat

Posts: 4379
Joined: 3/26/2006
Status: offline

OOOO I should have saved some of the classics I have gotten. Today I got called a fatty after I was barked at and order to immediately submit my yahoo id... Even though he emailed me I was told if I interested in speaking to him I would live by his terms.. When I told him thanks but umm no thanks I was interested he insulted my logic and called me a fatty.

<sniffles> I think my feelings should be hurt.....
Well I guess it's a good thing I don't have any of those <grins>

_____________________________

Anyone who says they have only one life to live must not know how to read a book - Unknown

(in reply to Emperor1956)

Post #: 17

RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 5/31/2006 11:06:06 AM

Reflectivesoul

Posts: 1777
Joined: 4/25/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Emperor1956

For those of you poor submissives who lack definitive junk email (and for those of you who just get a kick out of it), worry no more:

Dear [insert your submissive, snively, self here]:

I read your profile on CollarMe and I found your profile unique, notwithstanding I am sending this to 186 other women who caught my eye TODAY. I am the ONE TRUE DOMINONT MASTER on this computer board and I have selected YOU to be MY slave.

To show ME your true submission, you will fall to your nees NOW, and MASTRUBRATE while calling out MY name (which you will find at the foot of this message). I WILL WAIT FOR YOU TO CUM.

... ... ...

OK Now that we have that done. I hope it was as good for you as it was FOR ME. I am a well educated single male who is currently evaluating MY career options as the POST OFFICE has recently had a riduction in forze. I AM TOTALLY AND COMPLETELY DOMINANT except for that 14 year marriage to the EXBITCH WIFE which we won't talk about. I can relocate so long as I tell MY mom a bit before I move so she can rent out the guest room again. Wait...let me clean off the keyboard.

**** squick ****

OK. NOW SEND ME YOUR NAKED PICTURES AND YOUR PHONE NUMBER TO PROVE YOU ARE A TRUE SUBMISSIVE. IF YOU DO NOT DO THIS IMMEDIATELY YOU ARE A PLAYER AND A PHONEY WHO DOES NOT UNDERSTAND TRUE SUBMISSION.

(EDITED: I FORGOT THIS): You will NEVER tell ME you have limits. YOU ARE A SUBMISSIVE I AM MASTRER! Subs have NO Limits. Do not insult ME by claiming to have them.

[Optional paragraph for women who have stated that they want a Dominant near their age]. you are mistaken in not seeking a MAN who is older and wiser as WE MAKE THE BEST LOVERS AND THE ONLY TRUE DOMS. YES I am almost 50 and you are 19, but I assure you ONLY I CAN teach you what real DOMINATS is. DO NOT BE WORRIED THAT I COULD BE YOUR FATHER. I'm not. But I have a daughter your age....and that thought should leave you wide awake and scared tonight.

I EXPECT MY SUBMISSIVE TO SUPPORT ME IN EVERY WAY. Send ME your credit card numbers, now.

Oh, and be disease free, and I only play SSC.

FONDLY, YOUR ONE TRUE MASTER. <--- my real name. My parents KNEW I was the ONE.
_______________

God I have to get some work done *GRIN* -- E.

omg lol lol that about sums it up too lol lol

<edited cause SOMEONE ( not naming names ahem E cough cough) forgot some stuff lol >

< Message edited by Reflectivesoul -- 5/31/2006 11:39:53 AM >

_____________________________

ooooo..I bet THATS gonna leave a mark!!!!

Equal opportunity pisser on-er ... heh..

Gimme some crayons, I want color and I want it now DAMNIT!

(in reply to Emperor1956)

Post #: 18

RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 5/31/2006 11:13:23 AM

lisa1978

Posts: 224
Joined: 5/19/2006
From: Kansas City
Status: offline

Maybe not the stupidest but by far the laziest was one I got a couple of days ago from a guy. He did not have anything written in his profile and his message was only and I mean only his email address.

The type that piss me off the most, probably because it really insults my brain, are from men who tell me they were so impressed with me that they took a long time to write this message and that I should appreciate the effort they made and at the very least start up communication because of this. Then the rest of the message, while long, is totally generic and a clear copy and paste mass mailing message. Most of them cannot even bother to put my name on top.

They also always write me back after I respond and call them out on it, and they all refuse to admit it was the case and it did not matter becasue I am not real and they are already talking to 5+ woman anyway.

_____________________________

It hurts sometimes more than we can bear. If we could live without passion, maybe we'd know some kind of peace. But we would be hollow. Empty rooms, shuttered and dank. Without passion, we'd be truly dead.

(in reply to impishlilhellcat)

Post #: 19

RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 5/31/2006 11:17:01 AM

NCSilverWolves

Posts: 123
Joined: 5/31/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Emperor1956

For those of you poor submissives who lack definitive junk email (and for those of you who just get a kick out of it), worry no more:

Dear [insert your submissive, snively, self here]:

I read your profile on CollarMe and I found your profile unique, notwithstanding I am sending this to 186 other women who caught my eye TODAY. I am the ONE TRUE DOMINONT MASTER on this computer board and I have selected YOU to be MY slave.

To show ME your true submission, you will fall to your nees NOW, and MASTRUBRATE while calling out MY name (which you will find at the foot of this message). I WILL WAIT FOR YOU TO CUM.

... ... ...

OK Now that we have that done. I hope it was as good for you as it was FOR ME. I am a well educated single male who is currently evaluating MY career options as the POST OFFICE has recently had a riduction in forze. I AM TOTALLY AND COMPLETELY DOMINANT except for that 14 year marriage to the EXBITCH WIFE which we won't talk about. I can relocate so long as I tell MY mom a bit before I move so she can rent out the guest room again. Wait...let me clean off the keyboard.

**** squick ****

OK. NOW SEND ME YOUR NAKED PICTURES AND YOUR PHONE NUMBER TO PROVE YOU ARE A TRUE SUBMISSIVE. IF YOU DO NOT DO THIS IMMEDIATELY YOU ARE A PLAYER AND A PHONEY WHO DOES NOT UNDERSTAND TRUE SUBMISSION.

(EDITED: I FORGOT THIS): You will NEVER tell ME you have limits. YOU ARE A SUBMISSIVE I AM MASTRER! Subs have NO Limits. Do not insult ME by claiming to have them.

[optional paragraph for those who state in their profile the want only a monogamous relationship] you may be monogamous. I will NOT because I am MASTRER and I have needs and desires you can not handle. After we have been together 3 weeks I expect you to get a hot sub girlfriend for ME too.

[Optional paragraph for women who have stated that they want a Dominant near their age]. you are mistaken in not seeking a MAN who is older and wiser as WE MAKE THE BEST LOVERS AND THE ONLY TRUE DOMS. YES I am almost 50 and you are 19, but I assure you ONLY I CAN teach you what real DOMINATS is. DO NOT BE WORRIED THAT I COULD BE YOUR FATHER. I'm not. But I have a daughter your age....and that thought should leave you wide awake and scared tonight.

I EXPECT MY SUBMISSIVE TO SUPPORT ME IN EVERY WAY. Send ME your credit card numbers, now.

Oh, and be disease free, and I only play SSC.

FONDLY, YOUR ONE TRUE MASTER. <--- my real name. My parents KNEW I was the ONE.
_______________

God I have to get some work done *GRIN* -- E.

falling to my knees...............laughing my ass off.... submitting to the sheer sense of humor some people have............thank you so much!!!!!!! I needed this.

_____________________________

Wisdom is knowing what to do next, Skill is knowing how to do it, and Virtue is doing it.

(in reply to Emperor1956)

Post #: 20

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