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RE: To truly please a Lady - 2/3/2012 4:03:59 PM

LadyHibiscus

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It's all a matter of tone, innit.

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RE: To truly please a Lady - 2/3/2012 4:20:07 PM

PeonForHer

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

It's all a matter of tone, innit.

No. I don't give a rat's bottom if someone offers me a solution to a problem. I'll know that they're just trying to help and being sympathetic in the process. Women are a lot more sensitive to the thought of being patronised, I've found. In odd little ways, I've learned that I have to dodge and dance around the egos of femdoms, especially. I don't mind, though. It's fun, really.

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RE: To truly please a Lady - 2/3/2012 4:21:45 PM

LadyHibiscus

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Well, that's good, I think.

Women get patronised a great deal, and it's annoying as fuck from strangers. I am not interested in tolerating it from someone who should know better. I get enough of that at home.

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Post #: 63

RE: To truly please a Lady - 2/3/2012 4:38:13 PM

PeonForHer

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Well, that's good, I think.

Women get patronised a great deal, and it's annoying as fuck from strangers. I am not interested in tolerating it from someone who should know better. I get enough of that at home.

I probably get patronised quite a lot, Lady Hib, but I barely notice it. Why should I care? Quite often, if I register it at all, I'll smile and think, 'Ah right. I'll straighten you out when I feel like it'.

Stephen Potter, Oneupmanship. You must read this book post-haste. ;-)

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Post #: 64

RE: To truly please a Lady - 2/3/2012 4:46:19 PM

LadyHibiscus

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Mostly I don't notice it, really. The things men say rarely make an impression on me, except as reasons to stop paying attention to them. How else could I tolerate CM?

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Post #: 65

RE: To truly please a Lady - 2/3/2012 4:51:29 PM

PeonForHer

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Mostly I don't notice it, really. The things men say rarely make an impression on me, except as reasons to stop paying attention to them. How else could I tolerate CM?

Indeed. I've always thought you were a very clever lady in that way, Lady Hib. Almost as good as a chap, in many ways.

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RE: To truly please a Lady - 2/3/2012 4:52:51 PM

LadyHibiscus

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Indeed! It's been suggested that I might in fact be a Secret Bloke, but my lady parts beg to differ!

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Post #: 67

RE: To truly please a Lady - 2/3/2012 4:57:47 PM

seekingOwnertoo

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quote:

ORIGINAL: captivebeast2

What is the most intimate act a slave can perform for his Domina. That she'll know he truly adores and worships her. A closeness so shared that the emotional bond cannot be broken.

No way on earth any of us can answer the highlighted question.

It all varies based on the Lady and how you relate.

As others have said before me ... listen to her ... react to her ... and learn what SHE THINKS ...

Every Lady is different and what she likes will vary ... and it depends on your relationship, too!

Not an answer .. but you have to figure it out on an individual basis ... just as we all do.

Good luck ...

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RE: To truly please a Lady - 2/3/2012 4:58:02 PM

PeonForHer

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Indeed! It's been suggested that I might in fact be a Secret Bloke, but my lady parts beg to differ!

You couldn't be a bloke, Hibbie. You're too short.

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Post #: 69

RE: To truly please a Lady - 2/3/2012 4:59:23 PM

LadyHibiscus

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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Indeed! It's been suggested that I might in fact be a Secret Bloke, but my lady parts beg to differ!

You couldn't be a bloke, Hibbie. You're too short.

Well, since I can't imagine a more horrible fate than being male, it's all good!

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RE: To truly please a Lady - 2/3/2012 5:08:49 PM

thishereboi

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Indeed! It's been suggested that I might in fact be a Secret Bloke, but my lady parts beg to differ!

They obviously have never met you then.

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RE: To truly please a Lady - 2/3/2012 5:32:58 PM

LadyHibiscus

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quote:

ORIGINAL: thishereboi

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Indeed! It's been suggested that I might in fact be a Secret Bloke, but my lady parts beg to differ!

They obviously have never met you then.

Cant see me being a drag king, eh! :)

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RE: To truly please a Lady - 2/3/2012 7:50:36 PM

NiceButMeanGirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Hillwilliam
Listen to her.

and

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit
He gives her his heart without reservation.

and also, don't treat her like you think she's stupid.

NBMG

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RE: To truly please a Lady - 2/4/2012 4:20:05 AM

LaTigresse

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And that, to me, is what it CAN feel like when you are telling someone about a difficult situation and what you get back is "You should......." "You should have......" or "Well I would have...."

The are in effect saying that they feel the way you are handling something, or did handle something is less effective than they would.

I've rarely had a woman do the above. I've rarely had a man NOT do the above. Men, on the whole, tend to only hear the issue, then go into problem solving mode and stop listening. It's bloody annoying. Which is why I've developed the annoying (to G.D. anyway) habit of just not saying anything. I don't want to hear his opinion because quite frankly the issue is probably already resolved which if he LISTENED he would know.

So yes, I sincerely believe that listening is going to be the greatest thing anyone can do for a woman. Anyone that takes the time to really hear what she is saying, pay attention to her, is going to be sooooooooooo far ahead of the game. It is a life skill that few really have. Those that do, will always have an advantage in life and all sorts of relationships. If you pay attention, most people will tell you things, even they do not realize they are communicating.

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RE: To truly please a Lady - 2/4/2012 4:40:40 AM

thishereboi

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

quote:

ORIGINAL: thishereboi

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Indeed! It's been suggested that I might in fact be a Secret Bloke, but my lady parts beg to differ!

They obviously have never met you then.

Cant see me being a drag king, eh! :)

Not a very convincing one, no. Sorry 'bout that

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RE: To truly please a Lady - 2/4/2012 5:08:09 AM

FrostedFlake

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This has become a very worthwhile thread.

Thanks Ladies. Hib. LaTigresse.

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RE: To truly please a Lady - 2/4/2012 6:37:16 AM

LadyHibiscus

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Is it at all meaningful that LaT is a lesbian and I wish I were?

I hope that I, at least, haven't come across as man-bashing. I really think that men and women are different at a very deep level, and much unhappiness results when we expect one or the other to automatically behave in ways opposite to what we are. It doesn't mean that one or the other is "superior"--though of course, Grrrls R Better--, it's just a different way of interacting with the world. There are things that I do not *expect* from men, ever. I know better. We can learn each others ways, we can adapt, but we're not the same, whatever the reason.

There was a time when I had close male friends, indeed when the person I considered my "best friend" was a man. Right now...there are men in my life that I respect, whose company I enjoy, that I care about, that I lust after, that I dream about, but I wonder if I will ever consider a man a friend in the same way I consider a woman a friend. The very definitions have changed for me.

Thinky thoughts. Writing will happen later, maybe I'll post it on Fetl and my happily married submissive female friends can set me straight, or validate me, or both.

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RE: To truly please a Lady - 2/4/2012 7:18:30 AM

PeonForHer

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

And that, to me, is what it CAN feel like when you are telling someone about a difficult situation and what you get back is "You should......." "You should have......" or "Well I would have...."

The are in effect saying that they feel the way you are handling something, or did handle something is less effective than they would.

I think I might get that more from male friends than female friends but, again, it rarely bothers me. My ego seldom gets involved and there's no voice in me saying, 'Ah, so you think you're more competent than I am, are you?'' . I don't feel that they're saying, in effect, that they'd have done x or y better than I would have done. I just feel that they're offering an alternative way of doing something. I don't know a male friend who's ever expressed the complaint that you have about other males' listening/advice skills to them, actually.

< Message edited by PeonForHer -- 2/4/2012 7:22:04 AM >

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RE: To truly please a Lady - 2/4/2012 7:25:06 AM

PeonForHer

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus
I hope that I, at least, haven't come across as man-bashing. .

Of course not, Lady Hib! When you say things like "The things men say rarely make an impression on me, except as reasons to stop paying attention to them. How else could I tolerate CM?", your warmth and love for everything male radiates out of you.

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RE: To truly please a Lady - 2/4/2012 7:25:35 AM

LadyHibiscus

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Thank you, Darling. It's good to be understood.

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