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RE: how to know a true master and a fake - 3/30/2012 4:18:37 PM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline 		Here's the reality. People are people. We can dress it all up with fancy clothes and specific words, but in the end it's just a couple of folks getting together to see if my zing matches your zang. You, OP, need to be careful because you are "fresh meat." Just like in college where some unscrupulous upperclassmen will try to take advantage of your lack of knowledge, so too is it true here in this subgroup. Be smart, go to some events, make people prove themselves, prove yourself, go slowly, and if it's not fun, it's not right.

That's all I got.
best,
sunshine


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Profile   Post #: 41
RE: how to know a true master and a fake - 3/30/2012 7:10:17 PM   
LanceHughes


Posts: 4737
Joined: 2/12/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Kirata
quote:

ORIGINAL: TNDommeK
Don't forget the hat.

Absolutely. The importance of hats cannot be overestimated.

K.

Especially when used to hide one's baldness, right, Kirata?

_____________________________

"Train 'em the right way - my way." Lance Hughes
"Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer, but wish we didn't." Erica Jong

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50 nz points

Member: VAA's posse

(in reply to Kirata)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: how to know a true master and a fake - 3/30/2012 7:16:25 PM   
LanceHughes


Posts: 4737
Joined: 2/12/2004
Status: offline 		Thread jack apology!  Back to OP - - -

I'm going to answer in YOUR terms, OP.

If he is using you for his fantasies, he is NOT a Master that you want to be around.  "True" Masters have concern for ALL their property.  A slave is a Master's property.  A man with a Master's outlook would probably NOT put his cat into the micro-wave just because that's a fantasy he has.

In your terms, and from the tone of your question, this guy is NOT for you.  RUN, don't walk!

_____________________________

"Train 'em the right way - my way." Lance Hughes
"Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer, but wish we didn't." Erica Jong

10 fluffy points
50 nz points

Member: VAA's posse

(in reply to LanceHughes)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: how to know a true master and a fake - 4/1/2012 1:44:01 PM   
Englishcrumpet


Posts: 43
Joined: 2/28/2012
Status: offline 		is he fulfilling youre fantasies too.

dont fall into the trap that says you cant have a little of what you fantasise about too.

to some extent subs are all about fulfilling their Dominants needs, but there is so much more to it than that, to fulfill his needs it needs to fulfill you too, if only that you take pride in youre submission to him.  if there is no pride and no pleasure, no fulfillment of youre submissive needs and the terms 'use' and 'submission' feel interchangeable with abuse and subjection and you are not comfortable with that then there is a chance that youre not with the right person.

maybe the first step is to talk to him about what you were hoping for, the things that you have always hoped for in a Ds relationship.  this is something you should have done at the start, expressed youre needs and hopes, submission isnt about losing those things its about finding them with someone who has similar needs and hopes.

(in reply to LanceHughes)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: how to know a true master and a fake - 4/1/2012 3:12:01 PM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline
Englishcrumpet, may I congratulate you on having the best femsub's nickname I've *ever* seen on CollarMe? :-)

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Profile   Post #: 45
RE: how to know a true master and a fake - 4/1/2012 6:37:56 PM   
Lislee


Posts: 3
Joined: 2/16/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Oh boy. That's a tricky one. I know one man I consider a Master who imposes his fantasies on his slaves and play partners and has them wear chains around his house. I know some wankers who say they are masters who say that women will never wear panties around them. Imposition of fantasies is not by itself a disqualifier.

My own ideas (feel free to accept them or not) is that a Master will engage you on multiple levels. He will try to figure out what makes you tick, what your strengths are and your weaknesses, and work to use your strengths and reduce your weaknesses. He will think of what is best for you, best for him, and best for the two of you together. He will be someone whose lead you will WANT to follow.

The above Master once told me that his plans for his slave included teaching her about money management, getting her to quit smoking, and getting her in shape. He had a clear idea of where he wanted her to be, and he pushed her to get her there.

Does that help?


WOW!!! This is exactly how I feel a master should be...you have described Him perfectly!!!

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: how to know a true master and a fake - 4/1/2012 6:49:55 PM   
ILustAfterPeon


Posts: 39
Joined: 5/28/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer


Englishcrumpet, may I congratulate you on having the best femsub's nickname I've *ever* seen on CollarMe? :-)


(in reply to PeonForHer)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: how to know a true master and a fake - 4/1/2012 7:17:59 PM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline

OK, the *second* best.

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Profile   Post #: 48
RE: how to know a true master and a fake - 4/4/2012 9:10:25 PM   
tsatske


Posts: 2037
Joined: 3/9/2007
From: Louisville, KY
Status: offline 		As to why you are now vanilla: because you have 5 posts. the symbols and the title that goes with the symbols are CMs little way of recognizing forum involvement. Although I deleted my profile, went away for 3 years, came back - and it remebered me. So I'm not sure what you mean by 'a long time'

< Message edited by tsatske -- 4/4/2012 9:12:00 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 49
RE: how to know a true master and a fake - 4/4/2012 9:29:16 PM   
xssve


Posts: 3589
Joined: 10/10/2009
Status: offline 		The chair is a good sign, but the real indication is leather chaps - all true doms have leather chaps.

And mirror sunglasses.

Seriously, forget about domliness, it's like any other guy you've ever dated: do you want to see him again? If not, c'est la vie.

The real ones will simply hypnotize you into doing whatever they want anyway, you'll probably wake up bald headed and pole dancing in Indonesia.

Oh wait, that's roofies.

But - seriously, again, one good test is that if you say you're not sure you want to see him again, he doesn't slash your tires, harass you at work, or nail your cat to the door - he may still not be the one, but he has potential.

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Walking nightmare...

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Profile   Post #: 50
RE: how to know a true master and a fake - 4/5/2012 6:49:15 AM   
Mr4sg


Posts: 99
Joined: 9/2/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: temujin11

Define "fake"



#Define "fake" 1



For those who dont get it: its a geek joke.

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Profile   Post #: 51
RE: how to know a true master and a fake - 4/7/2012 8:04:50 PM   
Zensualista


Posts: 41
Joined: 3/18/2012
Status: offline 		Has he mastered himself? Does he want to lose 10 lbs. or quit smoking? If someone can't take control of themselves, then they shouldn't be in control of others.

(in reply to bitchdog4master)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: how to know a true master and a fake - 4/9/2012 10:35:42 AM   
wholelyhis


Posts: 5
Joined: 3/18/2012
Status: offline 		I like what DarkSteven had to say. A Master is much more than what the fantasies are about. It is very difficult to ascertain who is "real" and who is not, but it is truly up to you to decide. Who do you want to follow? More importantly, does He want to lead you in that direction. Communicate with this person and make sure that He is what You want. This is a game for some and a reality for others. If you want fun and games, well there is plenty of that going on. If you want something more, then I guess it is out there too. Only you can decide.

wh

(in reply to submissivejas22)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: how to know a true master and a fake - 4/11/2012 6:05:39 PM   
sweetkasia


Posts: 5
Joined: 2/10/2012
Status: offline 		i find this very odd, if i were to come on and question the validity of my Master , i would expect my ownership to be gone,, having said that , what is reality to one is not necessarily to another , it is us who make it real not anyone elses perception of reality, their opinion matters not the only truth is how we feel and please each other, we always make sure our actions match our words, in that there is no question of our committment and devotion and to hell with what anyone else thinks

(in reply to bitchdog4master)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: how to know a true master and a fake - 4/15/2012 12:32:08 PM   
Arturas


Posts: 3245
Status: offline 		What does a Master say?

Test Him.


Arturas

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Profile   Post #: 55
RE: how to know a true master and a fake - 4/15/2012 5:42:33 PM   
lilcracker


Posts: 243
Joined: 4/14/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

Personally, I have never come across a man or woman on here who was a 'fake'.

I have come across those who could be compatible, and those who could not.

But fake?

Nope.

I don't have to write a thing---Irish Mist said it all

(in reply to IrishMist)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: how to know a true master and a fake - 4/16/2012 7:29:41 AM   
thishereboi


Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
Status: offline 		nm

< Message edited by thishereboi -- 4/16/2012 7:32:21 AM >

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Profile   Post #: 57
RE: how to know a true master and a fake - 4/30/2012 6:21:18 PM   
MasterVernon


Posts: 4
Joined: 4/19/2010
Status: offline 		there are several ways..first do some reading on the web...google the submissive woman..that will pull up a lot of really good sites...find groups of subs..places were you can meet and chat on line and R/T and be cautious...the first rule of this life is Respect always Respect..start by learning the difference between submissive and slave..and decide which you choose to be

(in reply to submissivejas22)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: how to know a true master and a fake - 4/30/2012 7:38:54 PM   
JanahX


Posts: 3443
Joined: 8/21/2010
Status: offline 		Respect? Respect whom? I always thought respect was earned ----> by BOTH parties. Especially when it comes to online strangers that can say they are whatever they want to present themselves to be. Shit - 99% the " MASTERS " Ive communicated on here and other similar sites are all a bunch of talk - and just want wank off sessions.

OP - just screen really good - and you'll know if the right person is for you. Good Luck.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterVernon

there are several ways..first do some reading on the web...google the submissive woman..that will pull up a lot of really good sites...find groups of subs..places were you can meet and chat on line and R/T and be cautious...the first rule of this life is Respect always Respect..start by learning the difference between submissive and slave..and decide which you choose to be



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The second rule of Fight Club is you do not talk about Fight Club.


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Profile   Post #: 59
RE: how to know a true master and a fake - 4/30/2012 10:17:44 PM   
Arturas


Posts: 3245
Status: offline 		A master has mastered themselves.

_____________________________

"We master Our world."

(in reply to submissivejas22)
Profile   Post #: 60
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