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Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas - 6/4/2006 7:50:58 PM

dogobedience

Posts: 536
Joined: 3/30/2006
Status: offline

I am constantly learning, I lead by example and seek out and accept ideas and comments FROM ANYONE. The other day a girl made a comment to me on an email, it was good advise, she then began to rant about topping from the bottom. To me it was like my PA saying something great, then becomming the boss........yea right! To accept advise is one thing, to let YOUR girl attempt to control you is another.

Many girls attempt this in one way or another, topping from the bottom. Doms who are weak/new/careless/stupid/in it for only kinky sex, will never know and or care!!

I believe upon the first attempt to top from the bottom a good dom NEEDS TO TAKE CHARGE. The girls need that, otherwise you are shown to be weak.

Comments/ideas/rants/replies

_____________________________

I start and/or reply to posts to further my abilities and share my experiences in this fantastic lifestyle.

I hope I am an intellectual instigator, making people think and or laugh and nothing more.

Tiger, proud owner of kali aka Tigerproperty

Post #: 1

RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas - 6/4/2006 7:55:00 PM

dogobedience

Posts: 536
Joined: 3/30/2006
Status: offline

To sum it up taking ideas is great, it is different than not being in control.

_____________________________

I start and/or reply to posts to further my abilities and share my experiences in this fantastic lifestyle.

I hope I am an intellectual instigator, making people think and or laugh and nothing more.

Tiger, proud owner of kali aka Tigerproperty

(in reply to dogobedience)

Post #: 2

RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas - 6/4/2006 8:07:42 PM

leakylee

Posts: 747
Joined: 7/2/2004
Status: offline

Maybe this is a no brainer, maybe not. But the whole topping from the bottom concept is one that I never truly got. Me thinks I might glean something on this one..

thank you
love and light
lee

_____________________________

I am so not right, that I left..

(in reply to dogobedience)

Post #: 3

RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas - 6/4/2006 8:21:39 PM

CrappyDom

Posts: 1883
Joined: 4/11/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline

If you are shopping for advice, try this free tidbit. Try dropping the act...rather than sitting their sounding like a pompous ass and thumping your chest. That works in chat rooms but you have people here who have been doing this since before you hit puberty and just might already know this simple minded prattle you keep posting.

Of course, I am just in this for the kinky sex and cheap thrills!

(in reply to leakylee)

Post #: 4

RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas - 6/4/2006 8:27:07 PM

Tikkiee

Posts: 1099
Joined: 4/6/2006
Status: offline

Well hell; the only reason why I am in it is for the kink.

/shrug

Such a shame that in the last 5 years Chris could not become a manly man like you and take charge of me.

What in the world were we thinking?

_____________________________

~~@ cass @~~

(in reply to CrappyDom)

Post #: 5

RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas - 6/4/2006 8:28:48 PM

enigmabrat

Posts: 2383
Joined: 8/1/2004
Status: offline

LOL
Topping from the bottom is one of the funniest things ever because it doesnt realy exist just because a sub says something or does something that may seem as takeing charge well.. Ill sbhut up befor I cause trouble

_____________________________

Leather strap $85.00 on Master card
Wooden paddle $50.00 on Master card
ratten cane $48.00 on Master card

a Master that can use them all Priceless

(in reply to CrappyDom)

Post #: 6

RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas - 6/4/2006 8:40:59 PM

dogobedience

Posts: 536
Joined: 3/30/2006
Status: offline

I love a dom ATTEMPTING to top from the bottom as well.........nice

_____________________________

I start and/or reply to posts to further my abilities and share my experiences in this fantastic lifestyle.

I hope I am an intellectual instigator, making people think and or laugh and nothing more.

Tiger, proud owner of kali aka Tigerproperty

(in reply to dogobedience)

Post #: 7

RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas - 6/4/2006 8:46:18 PM

dogobedience

Posts: 536
Joined: 3/30/2006
Status: offline

Dom's what do you do when this is attempted on you. For most it happens only in the early stages, the trial part on both parties. If the girl has any experience she will try, even if by accident.

How do YOU take control.

_____________________________

I start and/or reply to posts to further my abilities and share my experiences in this fantastic lifestyle.

I hope I am an intellectual instigator, making people think and or laugh and nothing more.

Tiger, proud owner of kali aka Tigerproperty

(in reply to dogobedience)

Post #: 8

RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas - 6/4/2006 8:46:28 PM

Lashra

Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CrappyDom

If you are shopping for advice, try this free tidbit. Try dropping the act...rather than sitting their sounding like a pompous ass and thumping your chest. That works in chat rooms but you have people here who have been doing this since before you hit puberty and just might already know this simple minded prattle you keep posting.

Of course, I am just in this for the kinky sex and cheap thrills!

Wow and I thought it was just my nerves he was starting to get on with the girls this and the girls that. THUMP THUMP Glad I'm not alone

Gimme dat kinky sex and cheap thrills boys..

And yes you must teach boys not to attempt to Top from the bottom otherwise boys think they have the upper hand then you have to take a blackjack and pop the boys in the back of their damn head to get the boys attention and show him who the boss really is. Otherwise boys can be quite stubborn and boys well, they must be put in a boys place.

~Lashra

(in reply to CrappyDom)

Post #: 9

RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas - 6/4/2006 8:50:29 PM

dogobedience

Posts: 536
Joined: 3/30/2006
Status: offline

Not sure if that was toward me, if so, oh well............if not, then he has a right to his opinion AS DO I.

Relax, smile, have fun, I DO.

_____________________________

I start and/or reply to posts to further my abilities and share my experiences in this fantastic lifestyle.

I hope I am an intellectual instigator, making people think and or laugh and nothing more.

Tiger, proud owner of kali aka Tigerproperty

(in reply to Lashra)

Post #: 10

RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas - 6/4/2006 8:59:12 PM

BitaTruble

Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline

I've always been of the firm belief that if you can't take the whip out of my hand, I am going to beat you with it. Is that topping from the bottom? I guess it depends on perspective. If someone wants me to bottom to them, they'll need to get the permission of Himself (who won't give permission for that activity).. and I don't submit to anyone but Himself and while I truly believe he would be perfect if he were an S/m switch and an M/s Master, I accept his flaws

and am content to practice my sadism on those who allow it. I'm what you could term.. spunky.. although not bratty in anyway because my spunky personality is all for his entertainment. As soon as the line is crossed, he pulls me back to exactly where he wants me and with him it doesn't take much pulling because I want him to be pleased with me. I keep him laughing, so I figure it's all good.

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."

(in reply to dogobedience)

Post #: 11

RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas - 6/4/2006 10:15:20 PM

Vancouver_cinful

Posts: 1911
Joined: 2/3/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble

I've always been of the firm belief that if you can't take the whip out of my hand, I am going to beat you with it. Is that topping from the bottom?

ROFLMAO You and me both. Anybody can claim to be a dom and bark orders, but I got the Teacher Look and that trumps Pompous Ass Bark anyday.

_____________________________

Cin

quote:

My Karma Account is huge, but I just can't seem to make a withdrawal!!

http://cinful.wordpress.com

(in reply to BitaTruble)

Post #: 12

RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas - 6/5/2006 12:45:12 AM

HarryVanWinkle

Posts: 1720
Joined: 5/8/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CrappyDom

Of course, I am just in this for the kinky sex and cheap thrills!

Why is it that on a website for perverts so many people seem to have something against kinky sex and cheap thrills?

(in reply to CrappyDom)

Post #: 13

RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas - 6/5/2006 1:15:26 AM

juliaoceania

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

you know what gets on my nerves? Doms who bottom from the top....

Really people should just relax and enjoy their partner whether they be on top or bottom. Maybe some think this is a vanilla idea, but all this sooooo serious "I am the dom and you shall bow wow before me" is a little tiresome. I know my role, he knows his... this is a given... now lets just play and when we aren't playing then lets be there for each other. Gosh, it doesnt have to be analyzed like this does it?

I know this may sound strange, but some doms actually ask their subs how they feel, what they wanna do, what they think.. it isnt a sign of weakness for crying out loud,... it is how their dynamic works... If a dom likes his sub to top once in awhile from the bottom whats it to you? Are you the lifestyle cop? Does it make them any less D/s that they communicate differently than you chose to? Who decides when the line is crossed between giving ideas and topping from the bottom? Do you have some topping from the bottom checklist or something? Enough, I got an email to write before I hit the sack, peace.

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to dogobedience)

Post #: 14

RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas - 6/5/2006 1:56:00 AM

irishbynature

Posts: 551
Joined: 5/11/2006
Status: offline

This has been an issue for me. In the past, I've attempted to "top from the bottom" to get my way and recognized that I was using it to be manipulative. Also, I recognized that perhaps my former did not realize my needs or else I wouldn't have been playing those kinds of games. I would hope that a (future)Dom would work with me on that issue. It me, it was a bad habit, period.

*smiles*
Irish

_____________________________

What seems nasty, painful, or evil, can become a source of beauty, joy, and strength, for those who have the vision to recognize it as such. Henry Miller

(in reply to juliaoceania)

Post #: 15

RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas - 6/5/2006 2:05:41 AM

timeoutgurlie

Posts: 588
Joined: 3/21/2006
Status: offline

I have no idea how you personally separate the two, what's your defining line in the sand?

I'd think with every person this standard would be different.

Personally, I know my place and would never step outside of it out of respect for him and the fact that he is my Master because he's earned that title. However, if I ever feel that he is not working in my best interest and is not caring for & protecting me as I feel he should and as he promised to...I'm not going to abide by my promise to obey him.

As his slave, I've chosen to submit to him because I trust him enough to, and if I'd have to 'top' and take control...obciously that means I feel liek he's showing me he can't be responsible for me any longer. I'd head toward a release if the situation lasted more than I could tolerate; make my feelings known to him, see if things change, and either stay or leave.

(in reply to irishbynature)

Post #: 16

RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas - 6/5/2006 2:13:20 AM

Sirandlittle1

Posts: 538
Joined: 12/22/2005
Status: offline

Well, he maybe spouting crap, but its commonly held crap. This sounds like its just out of a 'how to' book. What works in one relationship, is THEIR interpretation of D/s or M/s or whatever! It wont work that way for the next couple. Your knowledge is only current time period only.
So nobody, can say 'this is the true way' but they can share their own subjective experience of this lifestyle. It was once, with one particular couple, the right way.
little1

(in reply to timeoutgurlie)

Post #: 17

RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas - 6/5/2006 2:18:40 AM

darkinshadows

Posts: 4145
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: UK
Status: offline

You say topping from the bottom like its a bad thing.

I would suggest you are confusing t-f-b with a submissive personalities testing of limits. Yup - newsflash - even Dominants types have limits. I often find that dominant personalities who profess to know 'Topping from below' are usually only doing so out of frustration at not being able to control the situation they are in themselves. And they often define dominants who they assume are topped from below as weak or new or careless or 'just in it for the kink'. So what if someone is in it for the kink... does that make them less of a person?

A good dominant personality doesn't need to take charge - a s-type will submit - pure and simple. If your suffering from a lack of ability to control a person, it is because they haven't submitted to you. That isn't a sign of weakness, thats just a fact.

Oh, and for your information, not all s-types are girls. Many are women. Many are Men. And equally - there are some boys as well...

Peace and Rapture

_____________________________

.dark.

...i surrender to gravity and the unknown...

(in reply to dogobedience)

Post #: 18

RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas - 6/5/2006 2:18:50 AM

timeoutgurlie

Posts: 588
Joined: 3/21/2006
Status: offline

Personally, I think he felt a lil emasculated (spelling, sorry

) and now he's tripping on this like it's the girl's issue?

I don't personally believe he *should* feel this way, I believe a good individual is constantly learning and accepting, and to take advice or listen to others can only benefit you. I can't explain it, I just get a vibe like it turned into a blow to the ego and the walls of defense came up ad turned it into a match of good sub vs. sub who wants to Top.

(in reply to Sirandlittle1)

Post #: 19

RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas - 6/5/2006 2:21:03 AM

Reflectivesoul

Posts: 1777
Joined: 4/25/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CrappyDom

If you are shopping for advice, try this free tidbit. Try dropping the act...rather than sitting their sounding like a pompous ass and thumping your chest. That works in chat rooms but you have people here who have been doing this since before you hit puberty and just might already know this simple minded prattle you keep posting.

Of course, I am just in this for the kinky sex and cheap thrills!

*applauds n exits*

_____________________________

ooooo..I bet THATS gonna leave a mark!!!!

Equal opportunity pisser on-er ... heh..

Gimme some crayons, I want color and I want it now DAMNIT!

(in reply to CrappyDom)

Post #: 20

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