RE: The wonderful world of stalkers - (Full Version)

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Karmastic -> RE: The wonderful world of stalkers - (4/15/2012 3:38:31 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Marini

Question, just for the hell of it.

What is the difference sometimes, between a "stalker", and getting involved in a relationship, with a fucking crazy person?

I tend to worry more, about allowing an unstable psychopath into my life and opening the fucking door to madness, a lot more than being stalked by a stranger.

I read a thread earlier about people that run out and meet others from the internet real quickly, I thought to each their own, that ain't me!

I don't meet anydamn body male/or female off the internet, until I have known them a good long time, and they seem to be someone that I am willing to meet, and "possibly"allow into my life.

By the way, I met my ex-husband on-line in 1997, dated, married him and moved to Florida.
We are divorced, but still great friends, in fact I am a Godmother to his child.

I think the issue here, is not just stalkers, it's about also about allowing nut cases, and crazy asses into our lives, sometimes a little bit too quickly.

Peace


i didn't want to say that, but you're right, glad you were bold enough to raise that. There might be other factors that makes a person attract a certain type of person (i.e., people with victim mentalities attract abusers, and vice-versa). so it's not all random, and a person has to take some responsibility for what they're putting out into the universe, for what comes back.

DESPITE THAT - I'm sure sometimes you just can't tell no matter what, since some sociopaths are that good. But I'm also sure we've all decided to overlook a warning sign because "s/he's sooo cute", or whatever it was we liked enough to ignore our head and listen to our hearts (or other organs below the belt). pardon my French, but stiff dicks have low IQs, and wet lips make slippery slopes ;)




ResidentSadist -> RE: The wonderful world of stalkers - (4/15/2012 3:38:45 PM)

Yes.

Met her on CollarMe, dated for two months, moved her and her brood in for 90 day trial. Before I moved her in, she was perfect slave with perfectly obedient children.

Within a month, wanted posters of kids hung in local stores for shop lifting. The school sent kids home for cheating, stealing from other lockers etc.
The kids ran up a $1,600 cable bill and stuck someone else with $150 long distance bill. They stole $60 cash out of my wallet & etc...

I had a teachers meeting and discovered forged papers the teachers thought they had sent home about the kids conduct and performance. So I set up an accountability system with the teachers. Implemented a signed homework log. I took off work early and helped kids with homework at 4pm everyday.

The kids improved but not much. They tried new ways to cheat. Mom came to admit she had not taught the kids discipline. I put my foot down and said if the kids didn't shape up in 6 months, I was going to pay for a summer at a special military school where they would learn discipline.

At the 90 day point, mom said she wouldn't enforce the house rules or discipline the kids. I said that was unacceptable. I said the relationship wouldn’t work and offered to help her. I offered to move out and let her take over the cheap lease ($1,100/mo) on my huge house with several acres on a lagoon in a ritzy area. We still had passion for each other and I had to go out of town on business the next day. I offered her the house to stay as long as she liked and think about what she wanted to do. She said "I can't do that, you've been too generous already” packed her shit and left. Then I had to leave on business for 10 days.

10 days later I come home to a broken window, house trashed... I mean TRASHED like a 1000 people had dance rave in the joint. The place was cleaned out except for all the old office and sports gear in the garage. You see, I still had all the equipment from my poly house when she moved in. Things like 2 clothing irons and several toasters so hot toast can be served to 6 or 8 people. With her there, we now had 3 irons. She stole everything... the food canisters, furniture, beds, computers and the irons. WTF does a women want with 3 irons???

My ex (ChristyCougar) saw the mess and said "you can't live like this, come live with me for a while". So I did. I turned everything over to my friend Lucivar, sold the 1970 Olds 98 convertable I was restoring to Gethan, loaded a truck full of office equipment and I was moved in and living in Daytona Beach 72 hours later (thanks guys).

Friends would call warning me about the crazy girl I left behind. Said she was hanging around drinking and talkin' shit, posting crazy crap on forums etc. Turns out she has a real history of mental illness. I new she was “all broken up” about a previous relationship failure at one time. What I didn’t know was that “all broken up” didn't mean she spent the weekend crying in her beer… it meant she was locked up in the loony hatch and the kids were taken away.

After 4 years of not having phones or bills linked to my real address, a few months ago I finally turned my Facebook back on etc. Figured I could get back to normal… I was wrong. Within a week that crazy bitch was perving my CM profile.

I do believe that officially counts as having been stalked doesn't it?




Mupainurpleasure -> RE: The wonderful world of stalkers - (4/15/2012 3:39:28 PM)

I think internet chat has a high percentage of unstable folks in relation to the real world . It's a place for them to be something they are not. I guess as a guy and not a little guy I don't have the same sense of a need to be super cautious. I figuire as long as someone doesn't know where I live the worst they can do is make me use an ignore feature. I wouldn't let anyone know where I lived till I was quite sure they weren't going to be standing in the rain at 3am throwingrocks at my window.... a roommates experience when I was younger and he had a bitch of a time shaking her




Marini -> RE: The wonderful world of stalkers - (4/15/2012 3:40:52 PM)

Great post!! This is from the Violet Crimes against women website!

They said, only a few stalkers, suffer from a diagnosed mental illness!
I would venture to say, I bet many "stalkers" have jobs, and are living
fairly good lives.

Combat Violence/Crimes against women

According to statistics, many perpetrators are not clinically mentally ill, of course there are certainly some that are, the statistics state many are not mentally ill.

From the website, information about perpetrators/stalkers:

The majority of stalkers are not mentally ill. A minority (usually stranger stalkers) suffer from mental health disorders (such as paranoid schizophrenia or manic depression) and exhibit delusional thought patterns or behaviors.





ChatteParfaitt -> RE: The wonderful world of stalkers - (4/15/2012 3:41:30 PM)

Yes.




Marini -> RE: The wonderful world of stalkers - (4/15/2012 3:47:48 PM)

My point is Resident Sadist, you were not stalked by a stranger.

You opened the door and entered into a relationship, with a crazy assed bitch.

She was not a stranger.

At some point, people have to accept that everyone in the world, is not a nice person, and maybe we allowed ourselves to enter into a relationship with someone that lied to us, and turned out to be a crazy mother fucking bitch/or bastard.

My father{my hero}, told me 25 years ago, something I hope to never forget:

He said you can make the choice, but you can not choose the consequences.

Sometimes we choose to become involved with crazy mother fucking bitches.

The crazy, high on all manner of drugs, psycho asshole, bitch that put a fucking gun to my head when I was 18, was someone that I chose to fucking deal with.

I learned my lesson early, call me paranoid, call me whatever you want, I have not had any similar experiences with men, that I KNOW, since that time.

It takes me a long time, to become involved with someone, especially intimately, and I love that about me.
Peace




ChatteParfaitt -> RE: The wonderful world of stalkers - (4/15/2012 3:49:15 PM)

Oh believe me, once you have been through it, you are more than willing to accept that the person was crazy and your judgement was off.

More than willing.




ResidentSadist -> RE: The wonderful world of stalkers - (4/15/2012 3:56:32 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt

Yes.

I used to work with stars in the music industry... my story is very mild so I wasn't really sure. Police were involved but no one got shot. I never got a dedicated fan's severed genitals in the mail proclaiming they would only have sex with me. Stuff like that is what I grew up with since my late teens when I got into the industry. In fact, it was from rock star Patti Smith that I learned you could use a PO box for bank accounts and checkbooks. Basically I learned how to disappear from famous musicians.




Marini -> RE: The wonderful world of stalkers - (4/15/2012 3:56:49 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt

Oh believe me, once you have been through it, you are more than willing to accept that the person was crazy and your judgement was off.

More than willing.



Group huggles, and if we are smart, we are a lot more careful about who we let into our lives, forever more.

[;)]




ChatteParfaitt -> RE: The wonderful world of stalkers - (4/15/2012 3:59:30 PM)

Sweetie, I *am* smart. And discerning. And careful. And it happened to me.

Blanket statements like be smart are useless when you come up against a predatory sociopath.

They prey on weakness. Now tell me, who among us has no weakness?




ResidentSadist -> RE: The wonderful world of stalkers - (4/15/2012 3:59:50 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Marini

My point is Resident Sadist, you were not stalked by a stranger.

You opened the door and entered into a relationship, with a crazy assed bitch.

She was not a stranger.

At some point, people have to accept that everyone in the world, is not a nice person, and maybe we allowed ourselves to enter into a relationship with someone that lied to us, and turned out to be a crazy mother fucking bitch/or bastard.

My father{my hero}, told me 25 years ago, something I hope to never forget:

He said you can make the choice, but you can not choose the consequences.

Sometimes we choose to become involved with crazy mother fucking bitches.

The crazy high on drugs bitch that put a fucking gun to my head when I was 17, was someone that I chose to fucking deal with.

I learned my lesson early, call me paranoid, call me whatever you want, I have not had any similar experiences with men, that I KNOW, since that time.

Peace

So you are saying I may have been stalked, but she wasn't a stalker because she wasn't a stranger like the anonymous fans of a rock star?




MissToYouRedux -> RE: The wonderful world of stalkers - (4/15/2012 4:01:55 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Marini

My point is Resident Sadist, you were not stalked by a stranger.

You opened the door and entered into a relationship, with a crazy assed bitch.

She was not a stranger.



Mine was through work. Absolutely true not a stranger, but not (and never had been) a personal relationship.

"Opening the door" just means interacting with human beings who may or may not turn out to be crazy (not necessarily in the clinical sense of the word).




ResidentSadist -> RE: The wonderful world of stalkers - (4/15/2012 4:01:59 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt

Sweetie, I *am* smart. And discerning. And careful. And it happened to me.

Blanket statements like be smart are useless when you come up against a predatory sociopath.

They prey on weakness. Now tell me, who among us has no weakness?


Apparently I have a weakness for "perfect" sexy young fully trained slaves seeking a Master to build a family with.




ChatteParfaitt -> RE: The wonderful world of stalkers - (4/15/2012 4:02:47 PM)

You were stalked, I was stalked. It's not our fault. Being smart or whatever has nothing to do with it when you are dealing with a sociopath.

They are good, they are really good. It's only in the end you realize how badly you are taken. Anyone who thinks it can't happen to them needs to think again.




Mupainurpleasure -> RE: The wonderful world of stalkers - (4/15/2012 4:04:35 PM)

The real dangerous ones will be invisible. it is a trait of a sociopath to "act" normal. They don't stand out, they are charming, they are often funny and they present the facade of what you seek. Abnormal pysh 101. They are the dangerous stalkers not the nuisance ones




JanahX -> RE: The wonderful world of stalkers - (4/15/2012 4:05:30 PM)

Key word -

quote:

sociopath.




Marini -> RE: The wonderful world of stalkers - (4/15/2012 4:09:30 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: JanahX

Key word -

quote:

sociopath.



JanahX, I really don't think many people understand what a sociopath IS.
That is something that is really scary.

I love your signature line.




Karmastic -> RE: The wonderful world of stalkers - (4/15/2012 4:12:21 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Marini

Great post!! This is from the Violet Crimes against women website!

They said, only a few stalkers, suffer from a diagnosed mental illness!
I would venture to say, I bet many "stalkers" have jobs, and are living
fairly good lives.

Combat Violence/Crimes against women

According to statistics, many perpetrators are not clinically mentally ill, of course there are certainly some that are, the statistics state many are not mentally ill.

From the website, information about perpetrators/stalkers:

The majority of stalkers are not mentally ill. A minority (usually stranger stalkers) suffer from mental health disorders (such as paranoid schizophrenia or manic depression) and exhibit delusional thought patterns or behaviors.



I think it should be recognized as a mental illness. they know right from wrong and may not be legally insane, but they are clearly ill. i'm not defending them or arguing for any legal get out of jail free cards, i just think stalkers are ill. i've dealt with a few online in a different setting.




ChatteParfaitt -> RE: The wonderful world of stalkers - (4/15/2012 4:12:26 PM)

You do realize, even expert psychologist can't always point out the sociopaths, right?

They are so good, so charming, so exactly what you want/need them to be, you really don't have a clue until it is too late.

I met this man in person. We spent a week together at my house When he left, I would have staked my life on him being for real, he was that good. And I have always thought I was a good judge of character, in fact career wise I am known for my ability to pick good hires.

The sociopath can mimic good social interaction so well, it's only over time you can determine they are not what / who they say they are. And by over time I am talking years, not months.

They can fake it for months no sweat.

I have known many people who like you think picking out a sociopath is easy and that getting involved with one means you are stupid or somehow flawed.

I disagree.





Mupainurpleasure -> RE: The wonderful world of stalkers - (4/15/2012 4:15:12 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt

You do realize, even expert psychologist can't always point out the sociopaths, right?

They are so good, so charming, so exactly what you want/need them to be, you really don't have a clue until it is too late.

I met this man in person. We spent a week together at my house When he left, I would have staked my life on him being for real, he was that good. And I have always thought I was a good judge of character, in fact career wise I am known for my ability to pick good hires.

The sociopath can mimic good social interaction so well, it's only over time you can determine they are not what / who they say they are. And by over time I am talking years, not months.

They can fake it for months no sweat.

I have known many people who like you think picking out a sociopath is easy and that getting involved with one means you are stupid or somehow flawed.

I disagree.



exactly, you won't see them. They go through life giving an academy award performance every second others can see them. they are the dangerous ones too because if having human emotion makes us human they are not human




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