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ORIGINAL: Kaliko

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ORIGINAL: Iamsemisweet

Why is 4.2 million dollars punitive for this severe of an injury, even by your justification? This is a teenager who will be in a wheelchair for the rest of his life. I have a partner with a spinal injury. He constantly suffers from pressure sores, that have on occasion reached the bone. He has bladder infections twice a month that he cannot detect, so it often reaches his kidneys. He had one kid, then became sterile. His wife has to insert a catheter twice a day for him to urinate. He has to wear diapers and a urine bag. He requires nonstop assistance. How much would you have to be paid to live like that for 30-40 years? Oh yes, his life expectancy is much shorter than a normal person, also. Calling that lucky is one of the more ignorant things I have heard anyone say.

Criminal negligence charges against the school? It is a municipal corporation, and i doubt any one person was culpable enough to go to jail. They would have have paid a fine to the state, at most. Personally, I would rather see this poor bastard get the money.

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ORIGINAL: Kirata


I am not sanguine about the way these cases are approached. In my view, an award of damages in the amount of the victim's medical treatment and psychological recovery costs suffices for the civil component of redress. The punitive component should be manifest in criminal negligence charges, not a winning lottery ticket for the "lucky" victim and his family.

K.

I don't know much about lawsuits and the like (thank goodness) but I have a hard time reconciling an award like that when the intent wasn't there. The boy who did the punching didn't do it with intent to put the other in a wheelchair. The knowledge was not even there, I'm sure, that it could happen. Seems to really be kind of a rare event, given the number of punches to the stomach that happen that don't result in paralysis.

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ORIGINAL: Kaliko

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ORIGINAL: DarqueMirror

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ORIGINAL: tweakabelle
There will always be bullies if people adopt your proposals. Why? Because nothing you have offered even attempts to change the bullys' behaviour.

If we can agree that the problem is the behaviour of bullies, then obviously the solution is to change their behaviour.

What fantasy world do you live in? It sure sounds nice. You can no more change the behavior of every bully on the planet than you could stop all crime. Criminals are criminals because they break the law. Bullies are bullies because they can be and no one shows them otherwise. You simply cannot mandate how someone raises their child. Some get raised thinking it's cool to push people around, some don't. The only thing you can do is pull the victim aside and tell him to stand up for himself. Take away the easy targets and you take away the bully's power.

Bullying prevention programs focus on exactly that - taking away the bully's power. It's not about running to the teacher every time a student gets his feelings hurt. Bullying prevention programs teach children to recognize bullying for what it is, to remove the social support for the bully (the bystanders), and removing the ability for the bully to hold power over another student.

So, correct, we can't change the behavior of all the bullies on the planet. We can, though, teach bystanders and would-be victims to remove the satisfaction of power and support that the bully receives as a result of his actions.

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ORIGINAL: kalikshama

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What needs to be done is to teach the victims not to be victims.

It works for women against would-be rapists, doesn't it? Go into a women's self defense class and tell THEM they shouldn't be learning self-defense to stand up to a potential attacker. Same concept...just another form of 'bullying.' The point -- make yourself as hard a target as possible and you won't be a victim.

I agree that the school was negligent and so the verdict just but also believe that teaching kids not to be victims is essential to anti-bullying campaigns. Not sure how to go about that because I don't advocate reacting to violence with violence at school and also I don't see what a victim of cyber bullying could do other than report.

http://www.stopcyberbullying.org/prevention/index.html

Preventing cyberbullying

Educating the kids about the consequences (losing their ISP or IM accounts) helps. Teaching them to respect others and to take a stand against bullying of all kinds helps too.

How can you stop it once it starts?

Because their motives differ, the solutions and responses to each type of cyberbullying incident has to differ too. Unfortunately, there is no "one size fits all" when cyberbullying is concerned. Only two of the types of cyberbullies have something in common with the traditional schoolyard bully. Experts who understand schoolyard bullying often misunderstand cyberbullying, thinking it is just another method of bullying. But the motives and the nature of cybercommunications, as well as the demographic and profile of a cyberbully differ from their offline counterpart.

What is the school's role in this?

When schools try and get involved by disciplining the student for cyberbullying actions that took place off-campus and outside of school hours, they are often sued for exceeding their authority and violating the student's free speech right. They also, often lose. Schools can be very effective brokers in working with the parents to stop and remedy cyberbullying situations. They can also educate the students on cyberethics and the law. If schools are creative, they can sometimes avoid the claim that their actions exceeded their legal authority for off-campus cyberbullying actions. We recommend that a provision is added to the school's acceptable use policy reserving the right to discipline the student for actions taken off-campus if they are intended to have an effect on a student or they adversely affect the safety and well-being of student while in school. This makes it a contractual, not a constitutional, issue.

What's the Parents' Role in This?

Parents need to be the one trusted place kids can go when things go wrong online and offline. Yet they often are the one place kids avoid when things go wrong online. Why? Parents tend to overreact. Most children will avoid telling their parents about a cyberbullying incident fearing they will only make things worse. (Calling the other parents, the school, blaming the victim or taking away Internet privileges.) Unfortunately, they also sometimes underreact, and rarely get it "just right." (You can read more about this in "Not Too Hot, Not Too Cold! Goldilocks and the CyberParents")

Parents need to be supportive of your child during this time. You may be tempted to give the "stick and stones may break your bones, but words will never hurt you" lecture, but words and cyberattacks can wound a child easily and have a lasting effect. These attacks follow them into your otherwise safe home and wherever they go online. And when up to 700 million accomplices can be recruited to help target or humiliate your child, the risk of emotional pain is very real, and very serious. Don't brush it off.

Let the school know so the guidance counselor can keep an eye out for in-school bullying and for how your child is handling things. You may want to notify your pediatrician, family counselor or clergy for support if things progress. It is crucial that you are there to provide the necessary support and love. Make them feel secure. Children have committed suicide after having been cyberbullied, and in Japan one young girl killed another after a cyberbullying incident. Take it seriously.

Parents also need to understand that a child is just as likely to be a cyberbully as a victim of cyberbullying and often go back and forth between the two roles during one incident. They may not even realize that they are seen as a cyberbully. (You can learn more about this under the "Inadvertent Cyberbully" profile of a cyberbully.)

Read more: http://www.stopcyberbullying.org/prevention/parents_role.html

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Far be it for me to agree with tazzy and tweak, now I have crushed my image. See what you've done

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ORIGINAL: lovmuffin
Law suits such as defamation of character might go a long way to combat cyber bullying against some bully kids parents with deep pockets. I wonder if this has been tried.

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Far be it for me to agree with tazzy and tweak, now I have crushed my image. See what you've done

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Wow, how illiterate kitkat...you've clearly not read any of my other posts (or at least failed to comprehend them). I've already detailed more than once how I was, in fact, bullied as a kid....until *I* stopped it.

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ORIGINAL: Moonhead

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ORIGINAL: lovmuffin
Law suits such as defamation of character might go a long way to combat cyber bullying against some bully kids parents with deep pockets. I wonder if this has been tried.

It'd surely be more effective against kids whose parents don't have deep pockets.
(Assuming that it can be proven in court that such and such an internerd presence is such and such a child, which could be well nigh impossible in a lot of cases.)

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ORIGINAL: lovmuffin

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ORIGINAL: Moonhead

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ORIGINAL: lovmuffin
Law suits such as defamation of character might go a long way to combat cyber bullying against some bully kids parents with deep pockets. I wonder if this has been tried.

It'd surely be more effective against kids whose parents don't have deep pockets.
(Assuming that it can be proven in court that such and such an internerd presence is such and such a child, which could be well nigh impossible in a lot of cases.)

I would certainly think you could at least pin it down to an address or iphone/pad or whatever.

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ORIGINAL: Owner59

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ORIGINAL: lovmuffin

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ORIGINAL: Moonhead

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ORIGINAL: lovmuffin
Law suits such as defamation of character might go a long way to combat cyber bullying against some bully kids parents with deep pockets. I wonder if this has been tried.

It'd surely be more effective against kids whose parents don't have deep pockets.
(Assuming that it can be proven in court that such and such an internerd presence is such and such a child, which could be well nigh impossible in a lot of cases.)

I would certainly think you could at least pin it down to an address or iphone/pad or whatever.

Until recently,it was next to impossible to get a police dept. to take up a case or do something about cyber-bullying.

I heard one account where some jerks made a fake facebook page,with photos and all of a guy......who would then be approached bt total strangers demanding to know why he was saying horrible things about them on his facebook page.

At the time,he did even have his own FB page.Took a half a year and help from the cable company w/ police, to track the offenders down......who turned out to be a former buddy who lived across the street and his pals.......having a blast fucking this guy`s life up.

Girls can be quite vicious too,especially with the mental/emotional abuse......like targeted shunnings and mass "everyone hates you" messages.Kids don`t always have the tools on their own,to handle these things.

My dad had a 'suck it up' responce when I told him I was being bullied......which I never really forgot.Parents at the very least should listen to their kids and better,be pro-active and curious about what`s going on.

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ORIGINAL: thishereboi
Yes, you did. You said your parents were bullies.

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ORIGINAL: thishereboi
I am also guessing that is why you decided to start lifting weights so you could defend yourself.

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ORIGINAL: thishereboi
And now you think all kids should be raised with this approach? Sorry, but to me it's just sad.

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ORIGINAL: angelikaJ
I am glad I wasn't like the assholes who bullied me.

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ORIGINAL: lovmuffin

The ladies and Castle are right for the most part Darque. Standing up worked for you and me and does so whatever percentage of the time. But as was stated on some posts above when one victim stands up to solve his individual problem then the bully goes on to the next kid. And as I've stated before some kids are not capable. If ya can't get the bully to change the behavior then put him in a school for problem kids or expel the SOB or whatever. I don't have all the answers but many of these little fuckers just grow up to be criminals and there's no hope for them anyway. What ever it takes to get rid of them I'm all for it.

Far be it for me to agree with tazzy and tweak, now I have crushed my image. See what you've done

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ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

DM

You were never bullied.. your posts all scream that fact very clearly. You are simply here to stir the pot. Thats when you show up, and all your posts are aimed at pissing as many people off for as long as you can. You claimed to have lifted weights in middle school, then changed your story to high school. Inconsistencies will catch you every time.

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When I was in middle school I had *no one*. I was picked on routinely until someone pushed me too far. A few bruised jaws and a weight-lifting class later -- no one fucked with me anymore.

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ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

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When I was in middle school I had *no one*. I was picked on routinely until someone pushed me too far. A few bruised jaws and a weight-lifting class later -- no one fucked with me anymore.

http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=4096444

No problems on my end... you seem to forget what you write.

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ORIGINAL: DarqueMirror

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ORIGINAL: lovmuffin
The ladies and Castle are right for the most part Darque. Standing up worked for you and me and does so whatever percentage of the time. But as was stated on some posts above when one victim stands up to solve his individual problem then the bully goes on to the next kid. And as I've stated before some kids are not capable. If ya can't get the bully to change the behavior then put him in a school for problem kids or expel the SOB or whatever. I don't have all the answers but many of these little fuckers just grow up to be criminals and there's no hope for them anyway. What ever it takes to get rid of them I'm all for it.

Far be it for me to agree with tazzy and tweak, now I have crushed my image. See what you've done

True, not all kids can stand up for themselves, but don't you think it'd be easier to get one that could to stand up for one that couldn't? Certainly easier than changing all the bullies' behavior.