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RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? - 6/14/2006 8:57:57 AM   
txpet


Posts: 200
Joined: 4/29/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: puella

Being submissive is a part of one's personality.

Submission, itself... the act and giving over a total surrender and the depths of who you are, and all that implies?

Some might consider that a gift to receive from someone, some may claim it as their right by virtue of their ability to draw that kind of profoundity from the person begging so eagerly, and some might just take it for granted.

Nothing is a gift unless the person who receives it considers it such.... otherwise, it might very well just be another burden.


i was going to jump in on this thread but the above is exactly what i wanted to say.
::SMILE::
Thank you, puella!

_____________________________

Ken's dirty girl,
txpet jennie

(in reply to puella)
Profile   Post #: 101
RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? - 6/14/2006 12:01:15 PM   
MrDiscipline44


Posts: 1776
Joined: 1/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: hizgeorgiapeach
Nope - one free gift per customer, no exchanges or substitutions allowed, applicable only to new account registrants.  Suffer with what you're given, and be glad you get a freebie at all!   (After all, you can't exchange that "free gift for opening an account" that the bank gives you.  Heck,  ya can't even get grandfathered and get the gift later if you already had an account with them when the program started!)
Ah, but when you open an account with Home Depot, you get to choose from an array of gifts. Why not just do that. That way, you can see the gift for what it really is and know if your going to like it or not. I guess this isn't a good time to say that I'm not above re-gifting to family members. LOL

_____________________________

If you love somebody, you have to be willing to break them.

Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach.

Have you slapped your slave today?

(in reply to hizgeorgiapeach)
Profile   Post #: 102
RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? - 6/14/2006 12:16:05 PM   
iliv2servher


Posts: 228
Joined: 5/17/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: meatcleaver

I keep coming across this phrase 'submission is a gift'. To me it is arrant nonsense, if submission is a gift then domination is a gift. At best submission is a loan while a relationship is sound.

The sub wouldn't be submitting if s/he isn't getting anything out of a relationship in return, it takes two to tango so basically what is happening is an exchange of favours.

Am I right or am I wrong?


Well, too bad that you got out of bed that morning on the wrong side.  But in reply to your question, it depends upon who you are talking to.  Most of the dom/dommes who I know would never submit to extreme pain, or even moderate pain, which is why they are dominant and not submissive.  When you submit to someone you are giving that person a special part of you.  It doesn't matter if they are getting something out of it or not.  They are still allowing someone else to use them in that way.  But I do agree that we wouldn't be doing anything without some sort of reward.  Again, some people view it as a gift and some do not.  What's the big deal anyway?

< Message edited by iliv2servher -- 6/14/2006 12:17:26 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 103
RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? - 6/14/2006 12:35:31 PM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline 		Submission IS a gift...she surrenders control over her happiness to you, the fact that you derive pleasure from that control is gravy

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Profile   Post #: 104
RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? - 6/14/2006 12:45:37 PM   
ObsidianTeddy


Posts: 4
Joined: 9/30/2005
Status: offline 		This is my very first post on the boards but i figured this was a good topic if any to start. i have been interested in d/s for a very long time, i'd have to say for 20 years. 5 of those years i had no idea it was actually called anything at all. i have never had a real Master, although i hope that one day i will be blessed by one. i wait with patience while reading about other peoples opinions, how they cope and what they feel each aspect of submission and dominance means to them. i have learned a great deal.One thing i have learned over everything is d/s is what you make of it. There is no true right even though there just might be some pepperings of wrongs here and there.

Do i consider submission a gift? Yes. Is submission a part of who i am? Yes. But if you think i am about to submit to every dominant male who gives me the time of day, who pets me and says i am a good girl, then you have another thing coming. i might submit to a choice, i might concede and allow someone to choose my food for me, i might fall behind a step or two and be lead instead of do the leading but that is not a giving of my actual submission that i think is being asked here. my understanding of submission is one that is earned, and when that understanding of one another, the bond that ties one to the other is woven tightly through friendship, emotion, trust and honesty, then that gift can be given FULLY. Then it's no longer me conceding or allowing someone else to take the reigns, it is me acting naturally and giving the other what they earned and deserve.

And that to me is gift giving. An exchange of gifts. Because i know once i have reached that point i will be so very thankful for the gift the other has given me too.

(in reply to iliv2servher)
Profile   Post #: 105
RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? - 6/14/2006 12:50:47 PM   
Rapture^


Posts: 19
Joined: 10/11/2005
Status: offline 		Submission a <cough> gift....

Let us clear a few things up... In the context of bdsm there is no actual submission as the word implies. Are there a few exceptions? Sure, yet these exceptions are very very very very very rare indeed. You cannot have any type of submission if you if the "dom" negotiates with the "sub". That is EXACTLY what you are doing making a "contract" - quid pro quo or conditions to which girl "A" will "submit" to "Dom" "B". This is not submission. This is just as it is.. just lets have sex and do this or dont do this.. THAT is what THAT is.

If the relationship is not totally on the dominates terms then you dont have submission-you have the above. Anything else is just kinky sex. Is kinky sex wrong? Of course not. But dont say kinky stuff is submission because it really isnt.

Now, lets talk about the relationships for a moment. In society yes society as a whole "empowers" people. If you take away society er government what do you have left? Male and Female. Half you mouthy girlys wouldnt be so mouthy if you couldnt call 911 to make a cop or in the like kind cum to your defense. It would be up to your so called Dom's to protect your ass. Frankly, most and not all, wouldnt last two seconds in an actual challenge. Why? Most but not all are just do not have the skill set to actually make someone submit or even hardly defend themselves.

Do not miscontrue the above, I am just making a point in that the bdsm as it is commonly known today as is not about actual submission. Frankly, you dont need all of the neato toys to have a person submit-you do though have to have a certain skill set, charisma, etc etc etc etc...

Rapture

(in reply to PlayfulOne)
Profile   Post #: 106
RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? - 6/14/2006 12:54:25 PM   
Rapture^


Posts: 19
Joined: 10/11/2005
Status: offline 		PS.

Oddly enough most of the people I have encountered over the years as in females complain about not having a "Dom" to Dom them, then turn around and want things their way. Well... submission is not burger king and you dont get to have it your way.

So submission is not a gift..... it is taken in one fashion or the other else not submission.

Rapture

(in reply to Rapture^)
Profile   Post #: 107
RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? - 6/14/2006 1:38:43 PM   
hizgeorgiapeach


Posts: 1672
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Rapture^
Now, lets talk about the relationships for a moment. In society yes society as a whole "empowers" people. If you take away society er government what do you have left? Male and Female. Half you mouthy girlys wouldnt be so mouthy if you couldnt call 911 to make a cop or in the like kind cum to your defense. It would be up to your so called Dom's to protect your ass. Frankly, most and not all, wouldnt last two seconds in an actual challenge. Why? Most but not all are just do not have the skill set to actually make someone submit or even hardly defend themselves.


Bzzzzz!  Wrong answer, but we Thank You for playing "You Bet Your Life."  A person who posseses the strength to hand over control to someone else is Hardly someone who can't fend for themselves or handle an "actual challenge" without someone there to play CYA for them.
 
Call 911?  Pppphhhtttttt.  Why waste time calling 911 when I have weapons both conventional and Not so conventional to bring to my own defence in a Much shorter time span than it would take the cops to show up on premesis? (Face it, a well aimed cast iron skillet grabbed from the kitchen counter works Just as well as the .44 under the matress - and both are available to me.) Calling 911 waits until Afterwards - when I can let them know to bring a body bag with them.
 
Wait for my dominant to protect me?  Hrmph.  I've had more than one verbal tiff in the past with dominant partners who became incensed that I didn't wait for them to do so For Me. They felt I had usurped their perogatives and/or broken some sort of universal protocol that says I have to be incapable of standing on my own two feet.
 
The male/female thing is truely out of place in today's world.  1000 years ago, when the highest level of technological achievement was to face off at arm's length with an 8lb sword while wearing 60lbs of chain and plate armor - yes, it had a significant impact.  10,000 years ago when the species was still primarily hunter/gatherer, and eatting depended on the strength of someone's arm to bring down game, it was even more significant.  These days,  owning a decent rifle with a good sniper's scope, the development of pepper spray, and various defencive martial arts techniques have made that manner of thinking completely moot.  This arguement also blatantly ignores those situations where the submissive is male and the dominant is female, or couples who are same gender.

< Message edited by hizgeorgiapeach -- 6/14/2006 1:40:53 PM >

_____________________________

Rhi
Light travels faster than sound, which is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
Essential Scentsations

(in reply to Rapture^)
Profile   Post #: 108
RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? - 6/14/2006 2:16:50 PM   
ObsidianTeddy


Posts: 4
Joined: 9/30/2005
Status: offline 		It is my understanding and belief that being a submissive does not equal being a doormat. Just as i do not recall d/s relationships having to do with just simply sex. If i go into a d/s relationship looking for someone to protect me from the big and bad in the world then something is wrong.

After speaking with tons of submissives and slaves i have noticed that the ones i admire the most are rather capable of standing on their own without the Dominant/Master in their lives. They have opinions, they have their own loves, likes, dislikes, their own minds. And yes, some can be mouthy. Some are a challenge. I am one of them. I am very capable of defending myself physically and verbally, doesn't make me a lesser submissive because of this.

(in reply to Rapture^)
Profile   Post #: 109
RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? - 6/14/2006 3:03:36 PM   
iliv2servher


Posts: 228
Joined: 5/17/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Rapture^

Submission a <cough> gift....

Let us clear a few things up... In the context of bdsm there is no actual submission as the word implies. Are there a few exceptions? Sure, yet these exceptions are very very very very very rare indeed. You cannot have any type of submission if you if the "dom" negotiates with the "sub". That is EXACTLY what you are doing making a "contract" - quid pro quo or conditions to which girl "A" will "submit" to "Dom" "B". This is not submission. This is just as it is.. just lets have sex and do this or dont do this.. THAT is what THAT is.

If the relationship is not totally on the dominates terms then you dont have submission-you have the above. Anything else is just kinky sex. Is kinky sex wrong? Of course not. But dont say kinky stuff is submission because it really isnt.

Now, lets talk about the relationships for a moment. In society yes society as a whole "empowers" people. If you take away society er government what do you have left? Male and Female. Half you mouthy girlys wouldnt be so mouthy if you couldnt call 911 to make a cop or in the like kind cum to your defense. It would be up to your so called Dom's to protect your ass. Frankly, most and not all, wouldnt last two seconds in an actual challenge. Why? Most but not all are just do not have the skill set to actually make someone submit or even hardly defend themselves.

Do not miscontrue the above, I am just making a point in that the bdsm as it is commonly known today as is not about actual submission. Frankly, you dont need all of the neato toys to have a person submit-you do though have to have a certain skill set, charisma, etc etc etc etc...

Rapture


What the f*uck are you talking about?


_____________________________

Dating sucks!

(in reply to Rapture^)
Profile   Post #: 110
RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? - 6/14/2006 3:05:01 PM   
iliv2servher


Posts: 228
Joined: 5/17/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Rapture^

Submission a <cough> gift....

Let us clear a few things up... In the context of bdsm there is no actual submission as the word implies. Are there a few exceptions? Sure, yet these exceptions are very very very very very rare indeed. You cannot have any type of submission if you if the "dom" negotiates with the "sub". That is EXACTLY what you are doing making a "contract" - quid pro quo or conditions to which girl "A" will "submit" to "Dom" "B". This is not submission. This is just as it is.. just lets have sex and do this or dont do this.. THAT is what THAT is.

If the relationship is not totally on the dominates terms then you dont have submission-you have the above. Anything else is just kinky sex. Is kinky sex wrong? Of course not. But dont say kinky stuff is submission because it really isnt.

Now, lets talk about the relationships for a moment. In society yes society as a whole "empowers" people. If you take away society er government what do you have left? Male and Female. Half you mouthy girlys wouldnt be so mouthy if you couldnt call 911 to make a cop or in the like kind cum to your defense. It would be up to your so called Dom's to protect your ass. Frankly, most and not all, wouldnt last two seconds in an actual challenge. Why? Most but not all are just do not have the skill set to actually make someone submit or even hardly defend themselves.

Do not miscontrue the above, I am just making a point in that the bdsm as it is commonly known today as is not about actual submission. Frankly, you dont need all of the neato toys to have a person submit-you do though have to have a certain skill set, charisma, etc etc etc etc...

Rapture


What the f*ck are you talking about???


_____________________________

Dating sucks!

(in reply to Rapture^)
Profile   Post #: 111
RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? - 6/14/2006 3:11:46 PM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline
quote:

What the f*ck are you talking about???


I think he's saying that unless he gets to set all the rules then it isn't submission, and therefore only a 100% no-limits submissive is a true submissive worthy of serving a "Real" dom like him....but then again I could be wrong, but I doubt it.

_____________________________

Big man! Pig Man!
Ha Ha...Charade you are!

Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

CM's #1 All-Time Also-Ran


(in reply to iliv2servher)
Profile   Post #: 112
RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? - 6/14/2006 3:11:54 PM   
givemyall


Posts: 620
Joined: 12/3/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Rapture^

PS.

Oddly enough most of the people I have encountered over the years as in females complain about not having a "Dom" to Dom them, then turn around and want things their way. Well... submission is not burger king and you dont get to have it your way.

Rapture


It all makes sense to me now!  The last time I went to burger king and asked for a burger with plenty of pussy munching and multiple orgasms they looked at me very oddly.... thank you for clearing this up for me - im just a thicko submissive that knows no better, and I bow to your greater understanding 

(in reply to Rapture^)
Profile   Post #: 113
RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? - 6/14/2006 3:14:36 PM   
PlayfulOne


Posts: 1047
Status: offline 		A submissive is like a chicken nugget

K

(in reply to givemyall)
Profile   Post #: 114
RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? - 6/14/2006 3:19:07 PM   
givemyall


Posts: 620
Joined: 12/3/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PlayfulOne

A submissive is like a chicken nugget

K



I'd rather be an empty chicken nugget box and get stuffed full everyso often 

(in reply to PlayfulOne)
Profile   Post #: 115
RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? - 6/14/2006 3:22:22 PM   
PlayfulOne


Posts: 1047
Status: offline 		Not dipped in sauce and licked?

K

(in reply to givemyall)
Profile   Post #: 116
RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? - 6/14/2006 3:24:38 PM   
givemyall


Posts: 620
Joined: 12/3/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PlayfulOne

Not dipped in sauce and licked?

K



OMG Noooooo  that would make me a pervert!


(in reply to PlayfulOne)
Profile   Post #: 117
RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? - 6/14/2006 3:30:08 PM   
PlayfulOne


Posts: 1047
Status: offline 		and we all know perverts don't make good gifts,  "grins"

K

(in reply to givemyall)
Profile   Post #: 118
RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? - 6/14/2006 3:32:51 PM   
iliv2servher


Posts: 228
Joined: 5/17/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig

quote:

What the f*ck are you talking about???


I think he's saying that unless he gets to set all the rules then it isn't submission, and therefore only a 100% no-limits submissive is a true submissive worthy of serving a "Real" dom like him....but then again I could be wrong, but I doubt it.


Yeah, well, those who think that their reality is the only reality, are destined to be doomed.  If someone wants to make the rules, then they should find a universe that will accept those rules.  Frankly, they do not play well here.  There is enough confusion in this world without having to deal with demi-gods, who's only purpose is to further their own beliefs with the exception of all others.


_____________________________

Dating sucks!

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Profile   Post #: 119
RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? - 6/14/2006 3:49:24 PM   
givemyall


Posts: 620
Joined: 12/3/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PlayfulOne

and we all know perverts don't make good gifts,  "grins"

K


Perhaps its because this pervert likes to choose her own wrapping..... Oh no, not another submissive with a mind of her own!

Down bitch and pray forgiveness from the Burger King

(in reply to PlayfulOne)
Profile   Post #: 120
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