Submission is a gift!!!??? (Full Version)

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meatcleaver -> Submission is a gift!!!??? (6/9/2006 3:10:25 AM)

I keep coming across this phrase 'submission is a gift'. To me it is arrant nonsense, if submission is a gift then domination is a gift. At best submission is a loan while a relationship is sound.

The sub wouldn't be submitting if s/he isn't getting anything out of a relationship in return, it takes two to tango so basically what is happening is an exchange of favours.

Am I right or am I wrong?



cuddleheart50 -> RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? (6/9/2006 3:16:38 AM)

I agree with you, it is an exchange of favors.  Thats why I don't submit to a vanilla guy, there is no exchange going on there.



slavejali -> RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? (6/9/2006 3:18:39 AM)

I've never seen submission as a special gift, if its part of your personality all you are doing is expressing and sharing your self with another.

Saying that though, when someone smiles at me, I see that as a gift....so perhaps any positive thing we share of ourselves is a gift to the recipient.

I know to be in a relationship with a dominant person is a gift to me..and they are just sharing themselves too...if it had to be manufactured and became too much like hard work sharing their dominant personality with me and so the person saw it like some gift they were giving that took some terrible great effort...I wouldnt see that as a gift at all but a burden they were laying me with..wouldnt be conducive to a healthy relationship in my book.




ExistentialSteel -> RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? (6/9/2006 3:28:28 AM)

For the sake of discussion, MeatCleaver, I won’t answer with the obvious…no. A chicken or egg question this early in the morning making this rooster crow.

If a sub wants to look at is as a gift in box that she gives to me, I can accept that. It makes her feel better that she is giving me something valuable. Maybe it is her way of validating her service. In a way it is a gift even if it is one of her ingrained behavior. She chooses to give that behavior to me. If I don’t accept it, she may be walking around in a crowded, bustling place called life feeling more and more withdrawn with a gift box that becomes heavier and heavier.



agirl -> RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? (6/9/2006 3:28:55 AM)

Hello meatcleaver,

No, I don't view it as a gift either....in fact the whole phrase makes me squirm.

agirl





ExistentialSteel -> RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? (6/9/2006 3:32:18 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: agirl

Hello meatcleaver,

No, I don't view it as a gift either....in fact the whole phrase makes me squirm.

agirl



Wow, we got to see you squirm. Meatcleaver, keep posting things like that. You are onto something here.



Level -> RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? (6/9/2006 3:41:26 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: ExistentialSteel

quote:

ORIGINAL: agirl

Hello meatcleaver,

No, I don't view it as a gift either....in fact the whole phrase makes me squirm.

agirl



Wow, we got to see you squirm. Meatcleaver, keep posting things like that. You are onto something here.


Not much as good as seeing a beautiful woman squirm, agreed. [:D]
 
As for the OP.... I don't see it as a gift, because a gift is, or should, be a permanent thing, not a loan lol. But I do see what jali meant, as well, that it's something positive given to one, like a smile.



KatyLied -> RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? (6/9/2006 3:42:51 AM)

Read my sigline, I'm a strong believer, it's not a gift.  Saying that "submission is a gift" is silly lifestyle speak.



Aileen68 -> RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? (6/9/2006 3:43:37 AM)

To me, submission is just a natural aspect of my personality.
If it's a gift, then so is bitchiness, friendliness and so on and so on.
It's part of who I am, just as all the other parts of my personality are, 
and it definitely influences how I interact with people.
But no, it's not a "gift."



darkinshadows -> RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? (6/9/2006 3:47:38 AM)

 
 
oh no - am I arrogant for posting those?[;)]
 
Submission IMO isnt a 'gift' to the dominant.  But it is a gift to me.  Just like I have a gift to paint.  I share it with those I love and respect and it is good to let others indulge in it's beauty, even if they may not always like the way it is presented.  Just like art.
But I am not about to rave about how great this gift is.  I wouldn't throw it into someones face either.  It is personal.  It is unique.
 
Peace and Rapture



ExistentialSteel -> RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? (6/9/2006 3:53:27 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: cuddleheart50

Thats why I don't submit to a vanilla guy, there is no exchange going on there.


That is a thought provoking line.



SirCumsSlut -> RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? (6/9/2006 4:02:11 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: meatcleaver

I keep coming across this phrase 'submission is a gift'. To me it is arrant nonsense, if submission is a gift then domination is a gift. At best submission is a loan while a relationship is sound.

The sub wouldn't be submitting if s/he isn't getting anything out of a relationship in return, it takes two to tango so basically what is happening is an exchange of favours.

Am I right or am I wrong?


Agree with you to an extent...........Sir gifted me with his guidance and wisdom in order to release the submissive within me, and for that gift I will always thank the good Lord above for bringing Sir into my life...........my submission to him is not a loan.....He owns me body, heart, mind and soul, I will go to my grave as his slave as he will go to his as my Sir..........
 
The "gift" part to me is when you find that right One that can release the real inner you......and when that release is found, then yes it is a gift........a gift from a Master to his or her sub or slave



sabswife -> RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? (6/9/2006 4:04:28 AM)

i suppose i don't look at my submission is being a gift, as it is just me, who i am... nothing spectacular on that front because as a submissive i can't comprehend totally why it is supposed to be so special.  if that makes sense...?

on the flip side of this, to me, Dominance is a gift, my Dom enables me to complete who i am.  its something that i personally am incapable of, so i view it as a special talent, gift to Him, and to me.  so i suppose i could see how some view submission as a gift.



slavejali -> RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? (6/9/2006 4:08:07 AM)

I guess a gift is only a gift when its freely given without any expectation of anything in return.



feastie -> RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? (6/9/2006 4:10:53 AM)

No, submission is not a gift.  It's part of my personality, what defines me as a person.  Doncha wanna hunt down and kill the person that made that line up?  I can see how some people think it's a gift though.  A submissive opens a door to the deepest parts of herself and invites her dominant in to share it with her.  That's pretty special, because not many people get the invitation.  Of course, if things are as they should be, he does the same. 

No, it's not a gift, it's just sharing who you are.



agirl -> RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? (6/9/2006 4:25:30 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: ExistentialSteel

quote:

ORIGINAL: agirl

Hello meatcleaver,

No, I don't view it as a gift either....in fact the whole phrase makes me squirm.

agirl



Wow, we got to see you squirm. Meatcleaver, keep posting things like that. You are onto something here.


I really must choose my words with more care......lol

agirl



RavenMuse -> RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? (6/9/2006 4:31:15 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: meatcleaver

I keep coming across this phrase 'submission is a gift'. To me it is arrant nonsense, if submission is a gift then domination is a gift. At best submission is a loan while a relationship is sound.

The sub wouldn't be submitting if s/he isn't getting anything out of a relationship in return, it takes two to tango so basically what is happening is an exchange of favours.

Am I right or am I wrong?


I don't agree with you particulary often, but here is one of those rare occassions where I do.

"Submission is a gift"? Really? WTF happens to most gifts? The person it is given to smiles, pats the giver on the head a few days later the gift ends up at the back of the cupboard taken for granted for a couple of years before ending up down the charity shop!

My girl didn't give me a 'gift' of her submission.... 'gift' doesn't imply responcibility.... She offered her submission I TOOK UP the responcibility for that submission.

As you say meatie, an exchange with both partys benifiting from it.



twicehappy -> RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? (6/9/2006 4:35:36 AM)

I have to agree with you here it is not a gift, it is an exchange. To me people who carry on about it being a gift are like the wives who "give" you that occasional sex as a gift, when in reality that is also supposedly an exchange.



bandit25 -> RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? (6/9/2006 4:41:51 AM)

I don't get that phrase either.  It isn't any more a gift than most other things.



smilezz -> RE: Submission is a gift!!!??? (6/9/2006 4:48:15 AM)

Submission is no gift.  That's my thought.  There are also many threads on this topic as to why/why not. 

Happy Friday y'all..

~smilezz~



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