RE: Initial email approach (Full Version)

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Westwood -> RE: Initial email approach (7/26/2012 1:43:45 PM)

Thank you to all who replied.

I never think I am exceptional nor the exception and certainly never send cock shots nor mention anything sexual so at least I'm doing that right!!

And perhaps it was my scary face all along, thanks for the advice on pictures. Must try harder not to be visually creepy!!

Thanks also for the link to the thread on 'meeting women' - will check this out.

JHonP - well you must be doing something right so I hope it works out for you in the way you want.

CrazyML - thank you, some good points you make. Unfortunately the height if not the age is what I like (or need being a short arse myself!) so perhaps thats something I need to take into consideration. Or buy some Cuban heels.


Again, thank you all for replying, it is much appreciated.



crazyml -> RE: Initial email approach (7/26/2012 1:53:13 PM)

Hey,

Thank-you! That was a very nice thing to say. Naturally, as you come to know me better, you'll have plenty of opportunity to witness my capacity for being a snarky jackass too.

kalikshama... as for you, you should certainly know me better!



kalikshama -> RE: Initial email approach (7/26/2012 1:54:58 PM)

"Wit" is "snark" with a British accent [;)]



crazyml -> RE: Initial email approach (7/26/2012 1:59:06 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: kalikshama

Ya, OP - keep the blue pic for your avatar here and swap the smiling pic for your main profile pic.


Yeah I agree.



divi -> RE: Initial email approach (7/26/2012 2:01:06 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Westwood

Thank you to all who replied.

I never think I am exceptional nor the exception and certainly never send cock shots nor mention anything sexual so at least I'm doing that right!!

And perhaps it was my scary face all along, thanks for the advice on pictures. Must try harder not to be visually creepy!!

Thanks also for the link to the thread on 'meeting women' - will check this out.

JHonP - well you must be doing something right so I hope it works out for you in the way you want.

CrazyML - thank you, some good points you make. Unfortunately the height if not the age is what I like (or need being a short arse myself!) so perhaps thats something I need to take into consideration. Or buy some Cuban heels.

( notices i get no Ty for giving someone a complement ...hmmp)


Again, thank you all for replying, it is much appreciated.



Westwood -> RE: Initial email approach (7/26/2012 2:10:10 PM)

And I would just like to say, Divi, thank you very much for my compliment. I don't get many so it is appreciated!! Sorry for not naming you in my reply.

Also a big thank you in the same vein to Kalikshama who has replied to me before, and also for her kind offer to offer critique.

Thank you also OsideGirl, LadyPact, ChatteParfaitt for their thoughtful contributions.

This is the closest I will ever get to an Oscars thank you.

Hopefully, I've mentioned everyone now!!

Thank you all again!!



crazyml -> RE: Initial email approach (7/26/2012 2:15:53 PM)

Dude! <ppssst!> you've got to thank your Mummy for making you the sensible, presentable chap you are to day.




divi -> RE: Initial email approach (7/26/2012 2:27:24 PM)

You're welcome:)



Westwood -> RE: Initial email approach (7/26/2012 2:35:33 PM)

Damn, knew I'd forgotten someone important!! I'll just tell Mummy that Billy Crystal cut me off...!



kalikshama -> RE: Initial email approach (7/26/2012 2:38:06 PM)

And have you taken my suggestion to use fetlife or informedconsent to find groups and events and try networking in person? [8D]



JhonP -> RE: Initial email approach (7/26/2012 2:40:47 PM)

quote:

Naturally, as you come to know me better, you'll have plenty of opportunity to witness my capacity for being a snarky jackass too.


My comment to you came from a sincere respect for the logic and intellect represented in those of your posts I observed and had absolutely nothing at all to do with hidden agenda, snark or disguised sarcasm.

Unfortunately, it was misperceived.



divi -> RE: Initial email approach (7/26/2012 2:40:51 PM)

baby steps lol



crazyml -> RE: Initial email approach (7/26/2012 2:43:07 PM)

Oh no! I was being light-hearted.

Thanks for the compliment, sincerely!



NiceButMeanGirl -> RE: Initial email approach (7/26/2012 4:37:21 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl
The best advice I can give is:

1) Don't think you're the exception to what some one has posted in their profile. It's arrogant and rude.

2) Treat them like a person first. If your first email contains references to sex, genitals and BDSM acts....you're probably going to get deleted.

3) One line emails like "how are you?" most likely will be deleted.

Please understand that sending an email is much like a solicitor knocking on my door. I'm under no obligation to answer just because you've knocked.

Most of the women here have been conditioned to not reply if they're not interested. A "no thank you" will 9 times out of 10 prompt a return email demanding an explanation, telling us we're fat & ugly, or telling us we're fake.

This. ^^^^ ALL of it. Every bit of it.

Yeah, when I remind someone of my search parameters listed in my profile and that they don't match them, I get called a fat bitch/whore/cunt, but it's like....hey, who wrote to who here first? hahahaha

NBMG



poise -> RE: Initial email approach (7/26/2012 4:47:13 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Westwood
I have taken a hopefully friendly, gently humorous approach to sending mails to people, as I think a respectful approach
as though trying to make a new friend is the most appropriate. So perhaps paying a compliment re:their picture,
mentioning a shared interest etc has been my MO. The one decent reply I did get, the profile was deleted the next day.

While it sounds like you have a good handle on how to make the initial approach, I'm wondering if you are targeting
the wrong audience? The impression I get from your profile is that you aren't looking for a specific relationship with one
special person, but more that you are looking to make friends with a variety of women and that they could potentially
lead to being play partners.

This isn't a judgement call. In fact, I find it commendable that you are upfront and honest about what you're
looking for, but perhaps you are finding interest in women who are looking for more than that?

I agree that switching your photo to the smiling one might open a few more doors.
Best of luck!



PeonForHer -> RE: Initial email approach (7/26/2012 6:08:23 PM)

FR

I think that when one first approaches a woman, here as elsewhere, one has to develop the language of gentleness, sensitivity, and poetry. One has to tease, gently; joke and make the lady smile with one's finest language of romance and seduction. That is the art of Love; it has been thus for an eternity, and it will always be thus. It beats the hot steaming shit out of me why more men don't understand that, to be honest.



kalikshama -> RE: Initial email approach (7/26/2012 6:09:19 PM)

quote:

My comment to you came from a sincere respect for the logic and intellect represented in those of your posts I observed and had absolutely nothing at all to do with hidden agenda, snark or disguised sarcasm.

Unfortunately, it was misperceived.


I read him as sincerely thanking you while being self-deprecating.



CRYPTICLXVI -> RE: Initial email approach (7/26/2012 6:09:44 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: searching4mysir


quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl


quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

I thought 9 out of 10 of you were, we see enough threads about it out here not to lend it some serious credence.


Well, I know I'm fake. I get told that over and over......



I'm frequently told I'm a "fat cunt". Is that supposed to be a bad thing?



No, it should definitely only be used as a term of endearment.

ETA: To the OP. Hell if I know but I do know that if you continue the approach in an honest manner, be your self and recognize that anything "online" is definitely a numbers game amped... and don't take anything personal. I haven't bothered checking out your profile, but from the responses here, it sounds as if you are doing okay.

Also, the last person that I have definitely developed an interest in... and am getting to know, came from this side of the site and not the "market" side, so just hanging out, allowing people to get to know you, that can absolutely work to your favor as well. Okay, unless your an asshole...oh, sorry, that's me, not you.

Cryptic




ILustAfterPeon -> RE: Initial email approach (7/26/2012 6:26:08 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

FR

I think that when one first approaches a woman, here as elsewhere, one has to develop the language of gentleness, sensitivity, and poetry. One has to tease, gently; joke and make the lady smile with one's finest language of romance and seduction.

Which leads to hot and steamy LUST, and scrotum worshipping.



PeonForHer -> RE: Initial email approach (7/26/2012 6:45:22 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: ILustAfterPeon


quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

FR

I think that when one first approaches a woman, here as elsewhere, one has to develop the language of gentleness, sensitivity, and poetry. One has to tease, gently; joke and make the lady smile with one's finest language of romance and seduction.

Which leads to hot and steamy LUST, and scrotum worshipping.



[:D] I've *missed* you, lovely ILAP!




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